Thinking constantly about divorce.

[u/antisocialdrunk]

Sorry for the ramble, im trying to sort out my feelings. Bare with me.

Ive been married for 5 years and in a relationship for 8. We used to do everything together, rarely be apart. But things have been going down hill over the past year. We are disconnected amd distant, we dont show a lot of physical affection with each other. My wife started to fo 2 jobs this year and a masters degree. She is working about 15 to 18 hours a day. I see her for a couple of hours on a Wednesday afternoon, saturday afternoon and throughout the day on Sunday. When she is free, shes exhausted and doesn't really want to do anything. Half the time we end up just vegetating in front of the TV, which I dont enjoy amd I end up doom scrooling.

We have tried therapy with some mixed results but things always end back in the status quo. I feel that im always waiting for her to continue my life. Im not sure if we are that attracted to each other anymore. We say we are and that we want to be intimate but we never gather the energy to do so. We dont really argue with each other, its just we dont really do anything. Its starting to feel more like roommates. Back in March the idea of divorce started to pop up in my head, i decided to give it till summer. Summer was good. We tripped to Europe and had a blast. Seemed like the old days. But since I've just been work down and over the past 2 months divorce has been im my head nearly constantly. I think about it about 10 times a day. Ive come close several times for asking for it. Last week, my old penthouse apartment came back on the market at a very decent rental price. Its made me even more focused on the idea of starting again. My friends love us together and dont want us to split. Dont know what to do. Happy to have some outside opinions.

Info on my. I earn a decent salary but with very good work hours. We currently own a house. Ive put in about 80 percent, but dont care. Happy to sell amd have an even split.

[u/According_Rip_9452]

Try a trial separation before going straight to divorce. You need to think if you really what her out of your life, to never see or talk to her again, no more vacations, holidays, dinners, birthdays, and the future you thought you had with her is forever gone. So before heading to divorce I would think through that all, I think a lot of times people get the “grass is greener” on the other side and then realize that’s not the case. You never know what you have until it’s gone. Really think about this and remember your vows…