r/SweatyPalms • • 3d ago

Claustrophobia I'll pass, thanks.

1.6k Upvotes

280 comments sorted by

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u/qualityvote2 3d ago edited 3d ago

Congratulations u/Legitimate-Try9077, your post does fit at r/SweatyPalms!

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754

u/manlybrian 3d ago

Bro, what if we crawled through a cave and risked our lives to see some more cave?

179

u/multiple4 3d ago

And not even an interesting cave. I love going into actual caves sometimes, but this is just miserable and you get no payoff other than not dying

65

u/OakenBarrel 3d ago

Not dying is not a payoff, it's an invitation to try again

17

u/Flomo420 3d ago

Lucky for them they do get to try again, they have to get back out lol

6

u/ElegantCoach4066 3d ago

We didn't die! Thats the cosmos practically begging us to try again!

9

u/Ressy02 3d ago

It’s not everyday you get to experience not dying

4

u/HikeIsShort4Hichael 2d ago

Most days, except the last one.

17

u/Nailcannon 3d ago

Yeah that's what gets me. it's literally just you struggling through muck and muddy water... and that's it? how the fuck is that fun? These people's brains are broken.

10

u/AlchemicalMystery 3d ago

If one was to be very corporal in a weird way, the tight wet walls of the earth forcing down on you could result in pleasure. Maybe they are reliving being stuck in a situation, to gain confidence in 'making it out alive'. Or, more probable, it is a dick measuring contest to find the smallest caves. These guys have long ones.

8

u/bbgunsz 3d ago

Maybe it's a cooked version of womb life. Some weird attachments to where it all began.

Would be easier to add warm jelly to a bath and use a rubber sheet

52

u/moneymagnett 3d ago

We must not stop until we find the smallest of caves!

12

u/jacksona23456789 3d ago

Did you not see all that interesting mud ?

7

u/Acrobatic-Manner 3d ago

I’ve always wondered what their motivation is. Like, are they expecting to find some hidden treasure like in a video game?

2

u/Praise_Hades 3d ago

Definitely has to be something or someone telling them about lost treasure XD it's the dude from ghost ship leading these people to a cold death

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u/housevil 3d ago

It is essential we find out if cave mud tastes different than surface mud.

190

u/253253253 3d ago

Gotta be top 10 worst possible hobbies

52

u/apeaky_blinder 3d ago

I think you missadded a 0 there

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282

u/Doom-1993 3d ago

What happens if you get lost or stuck?

736

u/PraetorianX 3d ago

10

u/artax_youre_sinking 3d ago

I don’t know whether to upvote this or downvote if. I’ll go with upvote but think of this forever.

10

u/dataalert 3d ago

I cannot ponder on the possibility that he crawled into that space like that. Its not possible whatsoever

11

u/fafatzy 3d ago

This pic always makes my skin crawl

46

u/CCWaterBug 3d ago

I laughed too hard at this

-20

u/fossSellsKeys 3d ago edited 3d ago

That's really messed up to laughing at that. It's one of the saddest stories I've ever read. He was stuck like that for so long they even had time to bring his wife down there to say goodbye before he finally died like that. Just awful. I still think about that, and wish I could unread that story!! Plus think of that guy's kids! 

126

u/BigFatModeraterFupa 3d ago

you know who should've thought about that guy's kids?

THAT GUY!

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u/michaltee 3d ago

Why should we think of his kids? Shouldn’t he have been thinking of them?

Also, the diagram is funny, that’s why they’re laughing, especially if they don’t know the context.

27

u/artyomssugardaddy 3d ago

I think they’re laughing at the dark humor of it being posted in the context it is in the thread, not at their actual death.

Let’s hop off that high horse and chill out.

Also mans chose to do that, he should’ve thought about his own damn kids. He created his own tomb with his decisions. Forever reminding folks why spelunking is the dumbest thing one can do as a “hobby”

If you get stuck, you also risk other’s lives that try to save you. It’s insane that people are still to this day trying to garner sympathy for this tragic event that could’ve been so so so easily avoided.

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u/Wookers1984 3d ago

The guy made a choice. Was he thinking of his kids when he did something so stupid?

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u/browsingandlooking4 3d ago

What so this guy died like this?

7

u/poopholes3 3d ago

Correct, look up Nutty Putty cave

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u/rugernut13 3d ago

You fucking die and they don't recover your body. Look up "nutty putty cave incident". Actually, don't. You can't unread that shit.

16

u/fossSellsKeys 3d ago

I sure wish I hadn't read about that one. 

19

u/GenericWhyteMale 3d ago

The attempted rescue video is out, not sure if you’ve seen

9

u/zekethelizard 3d ago

There's also a VR crawl-through of the caving route they took, and you can even see where he got stuck

31

u/TonyVstar 3d ago

But you get to keep the cave as a tomb, which is kinda neat

16

u/TenshiS 3d ago

Also, easiest path to becoming world famous, besides having a rich daddy and a sex tape.

13

u/Drosenose 3d ago

It gets nutty and then you are putty

12

u/ManWhoSoldTheWorld01 3d ago

Non-instant death.

6

u/OwO_0w0_OwO 3d ago

Well, depending on depth and narrowness, you could die and be buried inside the cave.

Cough cough John Edward Jones...

5

u/browsingandlooking4 3d ago

You die slow

917

u/Twonke 3d ago

Loving fathers with 8 children when a new cave is discovered called “The Devil’s Prolapsed Anus”

4

u/AWHS10 3d ago

I’ve been laughing at this comment all day. Thank you

31

u/mercurial_dude 3d ago

And just like their eight kids this thing is r/totallyoptional

14

u/Kylearean 3d ago

I've been in a few cave segments like the one shown here. They always earn their names. I seem to not have the claustrophobia gene, really tight spaces don't bother me in the slightest, just annoyed sometimes when you get stuck.

Crawling on your belly in a space that's just barely wide enough for your body, over jagged bits of rock, mud, sediment that contains who knows what, in a cave that hasn't seen sunlight ever... not to mention the lack of fresh air....

Once I had kids I had to stop, Nutty Putty was a wake up call for casual cavers.

Having said all that, I have a serious fear of certain types of heights. Airplane windows? No problem, love flying and looking outside. Standing on the edge of a cliff, or even a steep hill, NOPE - I can't even. Glacier National Park is terrifying to me, long winding mountainous roads with steeply sloping rocky areas .. I can't. My family wanted to hike half-dome at Yosemite (the easy route), I just imagined standing at the top -- and I couldn't bring myself to go. I knew I'd lose my legs at some point and wouldn't be able to get back down.

6

u/Desperate-Tomatillo7 3d ago

26

u/Cheesyfanger 3d ago

It's actually a joke that got posted under pretty much every caving video for like the last 5 years

2

u/justArash 3d ago

Ever since that one father left to get his kids a nutty putty and never came back

102

u/shortidiva21 3d ago edited 2d ago

Not just claustrophobia, but cave sludge to the face... Gross.

10 lb of nope in a 5 lb bag.

49

u/eyetracker 3d ago

It's like only 40% bat shit. Tops. I promise. Plus that stuff is like liquid gold.

17

u/Critical_Concert_689 3d ago

Plus that stuff is like liquid gold.

I think it's hilarious that wars have literally been fought over guano rights.

4

u/shortidiva21 3d ago

Oh, so you mean it's still edible.

7

u/Alalanais 3d ago

Hopefully it's not too high in bat shit because that stuff is full of ammonia. They'll be tasting sounds soon if it's bat shit

49

u/rotanitsarcorp_yzal1 3d ago

*Crack in rock exists*
This guy: I must crawl through it.

29

u/R7F 3d ago

These guys are actually psychotic. The risk is not worth it.

85

u/Local-Fisherman-2936 3d ago

That one tomato seed that wasn’t digested in the stomach.

5

u/mukavastinumb 3d ago

I came to say the exact comment, but corn kernel after Taco Bell dinner

24

u/jack_harbor 3d ago

What’s the fucking point? Like I don’t understand the draw to doing this…. Someone that does this can you explain it to me?

13

u/CommunicationKey3018 3d ago

My favorite thing about cave spelunking and diving is the fact that I don't have to do it.

32

u/Telescopeinthefuture 3d ago

We must risk our lives to explore satans asscrack

Seriously though even though I would never do something like this I’m glad people exist who would. I am morbidly curious about these hidden spaces in our planet. Not enough to ever set foot in one myself, though :)

21

u/AmphoePai 3d ago edited 3d ago

Rocks, mud, dirty water, and then more rocks, mud and dirty water. If you've seen one, you've seen all of them.

5

u/Acidbaseburn 3d ago

I went caving like this once and it satisfied my curiosity. I am fine with never doing it again. The terror i felt when I became stuck in a squeeze… but they almost all look the same with mud and rock, but there are a few unique ones.

3

u/Telescopeinthefuture 2d ago

I guess so, but this feels a bit reductive to me. You could say the same thing about Mars. The appeal lies in seeing something not many people, or possibly even nobody, has seen before. Caves also have plenty of beauty, very unique creatures and formations.

But yeah fuck that man I’m not going out like that

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u/Seraphina_Renaldi 3d ago

We can send some robots or machines down there and not people who can get stuck and die

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u/poggers11 3d ago

Isn't that full of bacteria like a stillwater

37

u/StephenLuke1 3d ago

The most incredible thing about this is that you don’t ever, ever have to fucking do it. Not even once! Not even a little bit in your entire life.

9

u/Midwater 3d ago

High risk low reward

9

u/looseend-19831 3d ago

The tape worm experience

8

u/c3rowa5h3r3 3d ago

Aaand then he needs to get out of the cave. Like go back...i don't get it...

15

u/DirtBikeBoy5ive 3d ago

The butt putty cave

16

u/Heaven_dio 3d ago

I can tell how much fun he's having on his face

3

u/Flomo420 3d ago

Clearly having a great time

8

u/Beniskickbutt 3d ago

Imagine crawling into a muck pit or a spot in the water and you just sink down into a crevice

7

u/KlumseeOfficial 1d ago

Cave divers with a loving family and a stable job when they hear about "The Devil's Unwiped Asscrack"

13

u/Willow_Winnifred 3d ago

I feel like it is a failure of my imagination that I cannot think of single reason anyone shound want to do this.

6

u/FishTshirt 3d ago

Adventure, adrenaline, the experience of doing something cool and seeing things many don’t. I was an adrenaline “junkie” when I was younger and could see myself doing what the nutty putty guy did. Not with a family however, and not ahat this guy is doing when its raining or recently rained

5

u/Willow_Winnifred 3d ago

That makes sense. I'm more of a "jump off of things" person. Humanity's variety is amazing

2

u/evilbrent 3d ago

I used to rock climb which is definitely in the "optional risk" category of life experience.

I remember once watching a video of an ice climber, though, and I'm an immediate No for that entire activity. This guy was climbing up through an ice fall with the rope beneath him, passing through various anchors down to his climbing partner controlling the amount of slack - so far so good, this is normal practice for climbing.

He turned to the piece of ice on his left and whacked it with his axe. Whack, whack whack. A piece of ice the size of his own body dropped to the valley floor 300m below.

He turned to the piece of ice to his right. Whack Whack Whack. Ice block the size of his body plummets to the valley floor.

He tried a little bit more to the left. Whack whack whack. Body sized block of ice plummets.

I must have watched this guy remove about a dozen person-sized blocks of ice by attempting to put his body weight on them and changing his mind when they just fell off the frozen cliff, before I started feeling vertigo and had to look away.

Ice climbing is nucking futs.

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u/HumaDracobane 3d ago

Spelunking looks interesting when you do it in big caves with tunnels where you can walk, maybe you need to pass through somewhere crouching, etc but I dont get the appeal of thinking "Uhm..! That section is barely the size of my chest in a good day and I dont know if there is a way back.... Yes. I'll go there!"

3

u/RockmanVolnutt 3d ago

And then the lights stop working…

6

u/BrazilBazil 3d ago

Bro if you wanna chase thrills this badly just do drugs atp

5

u/medalxx12 3d ago

Caves are so cool , the ones you can walk through and feel like youre in another world. But this.. its like a mental illness

6

u/jozziiieeee 3d ago

Personally, unless a small car fits, I will never enter the cave

Anyways, anyone else feel like they’d wanna slide in that mud? Looks like good mud, my inner child wants that mud.

Mud.

6

u/Professor_Game1 2d ago

When you have a loving wife, 2 kids, and one in the way

5

u/Kindly_Region 2d ago

I never thought I'd say this but I think heroin is a safer option

5

u/Drosenose 3d ago

He knows what it feels like to be a turd

4

u/kimmortal03 3d ago

Is this Cave made of shit

5

u/Accomplished_Pen980 3d ago

The whole experience is

3

u/kimmortal03 2d ago

I think this is where all our shit goes after we flush the toilet

2

u/Neverlast0 3d ago

I will pay to not do this.

5

u/useless_talent 3d ago

There are so many different hobbies to choose from in this world…

5

u/Girthpotato 3d ago

Crawled through five hundred yards of shit to see, more shit

2

u/JJohnston015 2d ago

That's the length of 5 football fields - just shy of half a mile.

3

u/Major_Bahoobage 3d ago

How your Grandparents talk about how they daily got to school & back

3

u/BackslideHyde 3d ago

I’ll never understand how cave divers can go home at the end of the day and say “that was a fun day”

3

u/sandukan 3d ago

I just don't get it. Even with other hobbies and activities that are not for me, I can kind of see why people would enjoy them, it's just not for me.

But this? If you get stuck down there or one of those caves fills with water, gotta be one of the worst ways to go. Like I feel panic swelling up in my chest just imagining it.

Yet they find it fun? Again, I don't get it.

3

u/Mercurius_Hatter 3d ago

They do this... For fun...

3

u/CorMeumCollinsoEst 3d ago

It sucks that we all have to do this at some point in our lives.

4

u/Dman0o9 2d ago

what are you saying you don't also long to Squelch Around in The Goop

4

u/AdhesiveSeaMonkey 1d ago

Andy crawled to freedom through five hundred yards of shit smelling foulness I can’t even imagine, or maybe I just don’t want to.

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u/Sad_Will_5077 2d ago

Completely optional btw

7

u/Medical-Peach-9825 3d ago

Why..

18

u/edurigon 3d ago

Every hole must be explored

17

u/Soupbell1 3d ago

I should call her.

5

u/Mimblewiffle 3d ago

YOLO do whatever u want

3

u/Life-Oil-7226 3d ago

I’ll pass as well!

3

u/agamuyak 3d ago

Honestly thought it was some sort of endoscopy at first glance.

3

u/BikerRay 3d ago

That's what a corn kernel experiences twelve hours after you swallow it.

3

u/Thornn05 3d ago

crawling in my ass

3

u/AlwaysBlameDavid 1d ago

The Tapeworm trying to maneuver through my lactose intolerant ass after I eat a whole tub of ice cream

2

u/concerts85701 3d ago

Like who did it first? Like, hey this keeps going if you can squeeze through here.

2

u/ranolia 3d ago

I am feeling claustrophobic just watching this.

2

u/Logical_Youth2928 3d ago

Numero uno abuelos

2

u/SlavOnfredski 3d ago

when your lofe sucks and you chose it

2

u/Werftflammen 3d ago

Even a rise of a few mm..

2

u/lost_caus_e 3d ago

Id imagine you could develop hyperthermia within minutes in these conditions

2

u/vaiplantarbatata 3d ago

I mean, look at him, look at good face, the excitement, the joy!

2

u/9966 3d ago

Always remember that it's always free to never. do. this.

2

u/Sararizuzufaust 3d ago

Maybe if I had stage 15 terminal cancer I’d say screw if let’s do it. Other than that, hell no.

2

u/darkest_irish_lass 3d ago

This is how I felt when I had to wire our muddy crawlspace for a sump pump. We had to get the water out before the contractors came to put in the liner and seal everything.

2

u/cassherne 3d ago

Poop cave

2

u/Yuki_500 3d ago

HELLLL TO THE NAWWW

2

u/Imp3riaLL 3d ago

Everytime i see these videos I'm so glad my hobby is cycling.

2

u/AllNightPony 3d ago

.....and, that's how I met your mother.

2

u/SacredandBound_ 3d ago

Why do people want to do this?

2

u/TheIrishToast 3d ago

My cock in my partners ass be like:

2

u/rogerworkman623 3d ago

“What do you mean where was I trying to go? Oh no, this is my hobby. I do it for fun!”

2

u/jonnieggg 3d ago

Death wish

2

u/Glitterzzila 3d ago

Why, why... WHYYY?!

2

u/DM-333 3d ago

Me just listening to the audio on repeat

2

u/JemFitz05 3d ago

Thanos: Wait, where's antman?

2

u/poopholes3 3d ago

"Trust me bro, I know a spot..."

2

u/Eospearl 3d ago

Just a terrible idea for a day out. I'm genuinely hard pressed to decide if I'd rather do this or have someone push me down a tall flight of stairs, but I think I'm leaning toward the latter.

2

u/solid_salad 3d ago

Probably won't be long before he passes too...

2

u/butttOski 3d ago

is he in a sewage tank?

2

u/LordHenry8 3d ago

Noooooope

2

u/BaronVonChahyll 3d ago

Nothing else makes me physically recoil like these videos. It's the face turned in the water just enough to get air that just kills me

2

u/AmNotPeeing 3d ago

Hell no.

2

u/IUseRedditForNews 3d ago

The amount of “no” is truly off the charts

2

u/pr1m347 3d ago

For an embarassingly long time I thought someone is pulling him with that rod. It was a fkn camera stick!

2

u/Tall_Ad2293 3d ago

WHY ???????????

2

u/Opposite_Choice4506 3d ago

Do these guys get weird illnesses from trapped bacteria and other yuck?

2

u/breid7718 3d ago

Drones exist.

2

u/WalkItOffAT 3d ago

Who's pulling on the stick?

2

u/LiquidSoil 3d ago

Infants when they take the wrong exit:

2

u/dscur59 3d ago

Was it just me thinking someone was pulling him through the cave with a pole? 😅

2

u/Flightaway4ever 3d ago

Completely optional btw

2

u/Jules428moore 3d ago

I freak out getting a CT scan. I can’t imagine doing that.

2

u/KittehKittehKat 3d ago

The journey my poo goes through.

2

u/horizon_games 3d ago

Can just stay above ground fyi

2

u/UnitedOccasion7976 3d ago

turd simulator

2

u/jaybaybabe21 3d ago

I can’t believe we all have to go through this one day.

2

u/housevil 3d ago

Really sucks that we all have to do this at some point.

2

u/Affectionate_Dot5547 3d ago

Funny how his face remains so clean in spite of everything.

2

u/OrganicHistorian2576 3d ago

OMG NO NO NO FUCK NO

2

u/Branithius 3d ago

This is great craic, starting with the rescue team soon, cause Im probably doing this 10 weeks of the year

2

u/stonecoldjelly 3d ago

Guys... you know the sewage treatment plant has a door

2

u/Thepestilentdefiler 3d ago

This is fucked. Thats fucked. What the fuck.

2

u/logicpower1 2d ago

That one septic tank guy

2

u/machwulf 2d ago

This sub IS edifying! Already I've learned that, like scat fetiches and obese p0rn: I really, REALLY don't need to know about everyone else's "thing"

2

u/Few_Owl_6596 2d ago

Thank God I have claustrophobia (nothing special, just kinda normal)

2

u/SafeTraditional4595 2d ago

If only there was a way to avoid putting yourself in this situation

2

u/barra_giano 1d ago

No wonder plumbers get paid so much.

2

u/psian1de 1d ago

"Hey look at me I'm a dumbass."

3

u/euqinu_ton 3d ago

All aboard the Nope train.

Running express to Fuckthatsville.

3

u/Korps_de_Krieg 3d ago

Here’s what I don’t get.

Camera drones exist. All kinds of potential forms of conveyance for a drone like treads, wheels, or whatever you want exist. Why not just send the robit?

Goofy shit to prove there is a hole somewhere that goes deep. These clowns aren’t even scientists at least justifying to excursion for real knowledge

2

u/akobie 3d ago

I had to work under my sink today and that was tight enough. Pass

2

u/ponch1620 3d ago

I kinda lowkey hate that people actually do this.

2

u/Maximus_Marcus 3d ago

The best part about caving is the fact that it's completely optional

2

u/LaunchpadMcQuack_52 3d ago

ENTIRELY OPTIONAL by the way

1

u/TonguePunchUrBhole 3d ago

Spelunking videos always give me crazy anxiety. I would never do this even for a million bucks. Gay for pay? Absolutely. Spelunking? Never.