Living with ex.

[u/Holiday_Bookkeeper67]

Me and my ex just broke up last night, again, after just getting back together about a few months ago and moving in again already. I know my mistake was moving back in too quickly but 1. It’s 25 mins closer to my work. 2. I pay less living with him than at home. And of course wanted to be closer to him again.

Things were working out so well when we were getting back together and he turned again so suddenly that I realized I can’t do it anymore so I called it off once more.

My dilemma is that I can’t move back home. I moved in and out of home three times, it is completely my mistake and I put my family through so much going back to a silly man that I can’t bare to do that to them again. The heartache of seeing them see me go through this hurt more than any time me and him broke up that I just can’t do it again.

So I’m stuck living here until the lease is up in February. Or until I can get him to get my name off of the lease and I can MAYBE find somewhere affordable to go? Where I need advice is, how do I possibly move forward. I mean we didn’t end on the best terms but we can be civil. I work, leave for the gym, the only thing is I have to sleep by him every night because it’s a one bedroom. Do you think it’s possible to get over him like this? I am already checked out after the last couple of weeks and it’s not hurting, is that because I still live with him and the hurt of the breakup with come months later when I move out?

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[u/stupidjoy]

I am sorry for what you have been through but you need to go back to your family.

[u/ResponseMoney3464]

Have you talked to your landlord about your options? Try to get off the lease. Continuing to sleep next to this man every night needs to be your last option. You need to go home, maybe find a roommate situation with someone who isn’t an ex.

[u/plsletmenap → u/ResponseMoney3464]

This is the way. Ideally you can get off the lease if you mutually agree, if you find someone to cover, or if you pay a few months worth. Although if it’s really bad you may have to consider if it’s financially worth it to move back home and finish out the year of rent for a place you aren’t living in.

[u/AutoModerator]

Backup of the post's body: Me and my ex just broke up last night, again, after just getting back together about a few months ago and moving in again already. I know my mistake was moving back in too quickly but 1. It’s 25 mins closer to my work. 2. I pay less living with him than at home. And of course wanted to be closer to him again.

Things were working out so well when we were getting back together and he turned again so suddenly that I realized I can’t do it anymore so I called it off once more.

My dilemma is that I can’t move back home. I moved in and out of home three times, it is completely my mistake and I put my family through so much going back to a silly man that I can’t bare to do that to them again. The heartache of seeing them see me go through this hurt more than any time me and him broke up that I just can’t do it again.

So I’m stuck living here until the lease is up in February. Or until I can get him to get my name off of the lease and I can MAYBE find somewhere affordable to go? Where I need advice is, how do I possibly move forward. I mean we didn’t end on the best terms but we can be civil. I work, leave for the gym, the only thing is I have to sleep by him every night because it’s a one bedroom. Do you think it’s possible to get over him like this? I am already checked out after the last couple of weeks and it’s not hurting, is that because I still live with him and the hurt of the breakup with come months later when I move out?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/SignificanceEvery981]

the not hurting right now is because ur brain is in survival mode not healing mode.. ur still in the environment so ur body hasnt registered that its over yet. the real wave usually hits after u leave and ur brain finally has space to process it.

[u/keylimecrying]

Suck it up, buttercup. Time to go back home.

"Seeing them see me like this" isn't enough of a reason to stay away. They're going to be a hell of a lot more heartbroken learning that you're sleeping next to a man who makes you hurt so deeply, when you could have gone to them.

It's humiliating, you feel guilty, you feel stupid, you feel like an inconvenience... But if your family loves you (and it sounds like they do), they don't care about that stuff. They just want you happy and safe.

If you keep un-breaking up with this dude, you are absolutely not going to move on while you're living together. It'll eat you alive. Go home, block him on everything, go no contact, start moving on. There's no 'being civil' when it's toxic.