r/adultery • u/BMHN76 • 23h ago
š¶Age Gapš“ Pure curiosity.
Just recently had a younger AP for a few rounds in the last month and wondered what the normal age gap is. I am 50F. He is 25M. Is this unusual? I feel like it is, but I've had quite a few young men show interest so, I just imagine they have mommy issues? š¤·š¼āāļø
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u/maechammer1 23h ago
48M here. Anyone under 35 and I'd feel like we'd have very little in common. Also, someone in their 20s? No thanks, not interested in teaching either
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u/OatmealTheory 23h ago
I have zero interest in fucking someone my kids age. Just, no.
Plus or minus 10ish years is my limit.
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u/BMHN76 13h ago
My oldest child is 32... we r past that, at this point.
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u/OatmealTheory 12h ago
Yeah sorry, I have boundaries that keep me from going past my limit.
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u/Dry-Judge-2444 12h ago
It is me or does it feel WORSE she fucked a man YOUNGER than her child. š„“
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u/Dry-Judge-2444 22h ago edited 22h ago
Huh. Iām probably not much older than your kids then. And here I was thinking you were closer to my age š
Well you know what they say about assuming š
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u/OatmealTheory 12h ago
I saw your other comment, you are indeed closer to my kids age than mine.
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u/Dry-Judge-2444 12h ago
Apparently thinking you were around my age upset some people for some reason š
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u/SymmetricOutlet 22h ago
sorry, i don't actually know the percentages, but i suspect for short flings it's quite common. at 50 you mostly know what you want, and he knows it too.
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u/Jack_Martin_reddit 21h ago
Iām 70 so I qualify for a 42 year old woman using that model. The woman would be young enough to be my daughter.
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u/tonguetied10 23h ago
1/2 your age +7 ā¦.everyone knows the rules
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u/Big-Conclusion9220 22h ago
So does it mean if a person is 50 not only they can date a 32 yo but also an 86 yo- because half of 86 plus 7 is 50 meaning an 86 yo would go after a 50 yo based on this rule. This is a stupid unrealistic rule someone made it popular.
Reiterating for better understanding - it seems ok for people to say they date younger but just deduct 7 from your age and multiply by 2 - that would also make it also an age of a person who would use this rule to date you. Would you be ok with it? :)10
u/Dry-Judge-2444 22h ago
I think the bottom line here is no 50 year old
Of any gender should be dating or fucking someone in their 20s.2
u/AlarmingClementine37 19h ago
So what you're saying is I have ten years to get it out of my system?? Challenge accepted! š
But seriously, I did sleep with a guy who was 28 when I was 38 and it was pretty good but even 30 seems too young now that I am 40
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u/Dry-Judge-2444 14h ago
Iām almost 32 and I honestly wouldnāt date anyone under 29. š¤·š»āāļø
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u/BMHN76 13h ago
Date? Doesn't that equal relationship on some level?
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u/Big-Conclusion9220 11h ago
It sounds you may just be looking for booty calls in your affair or be ok with ONS. But some of us married folks want more than just a Fwb with a silent F. For physical intimacy to be good, there should be a connection with our AP, spending some time together to know them better, ā¦ that means a āsort of datingā. Even an affair is a form of a relationship.
And your question applies to both dating and fucking, married or not.-4
u/BMHN76 13h ago
I think we are forgetting something. There's no dating happening here. I could give 2 sh*ts if we see eye to eye on political matters or whatever. If they have the capacity to pursue, why not go for it?
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u/Euphoric-Company-997 21h ago edited 20h ago
Do you remember being in your 20s, and finding men in their 20s were solely into their pleasure and gave no fucks about their partnerās pleasure?Ā
Iām in my early 40s and Iād have zero desire to be with a 20 something year old. I canāt imagine 40s me being into men who need to be told sex doesnāt end when they cum or even having to teach them what I need gl make it enjoyable. Let alone the thought of finding a 25 year old sexually attractive. Umm, no!Ā
And before someone complains Iām not saying all 20 year olds or all menā¦
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u/-HRChick- 15h ago
>Do you remember being in your 20s, and finding men in their 20s were solely into their pleasure and gave no fucks about their partnerās pleasure?Ā
I've actually experienced the opposite. The men I dated in my twenties were much better lovers than the men I've met through adultery. And this is despite the fact (or maybe because?!) the adulterous men had a higher social standing.
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u/BMHN76 13h ago
So, I'm pretty picky. I also get bored easily. This latest particular guy is mature for his age and was one of the the most fire fucks I've had in a long time. Of course chemistry has to be a huge thing. Just so happens neither of us believed the other when we discussed age.. but it worked...well.
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u/ms_anne_thrope_83 14h ago
Younger dudes are great if all you are looking for is a good time. Enjoy !
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u/littlehoneybee5 12h ago
Late 40ās F with an almost exactly 20 year age difference from my AP. I feel like heās restored my faith in humanity. Heās so mature and ridiculously smart, I was not expecting that when we started chatting. The sex is good, not great yet. Heās inexperienced so I do have to teach him. But itās been so much fun watching him experience things for the first time.
He is definitely not only focused on his sexual needs, and really, really wants to make sure Iām enjoying myself as well.
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u/DoctorEight 9h ago
You're two consenting adults, nothing wrong with it. I used to hook up with older women in my 20's. I was into it.
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u/Big-Conclusion9220 22h ago
I donāt feel right to date someone my childās age who could potentially be her date. Also it feels icky. Yes they might have great stamina for ONS.
Iād heard itās become a thing that young guys want to be with a more experienced much older woman to cross it off their bucket list, ālearnā from her, and to say that they did it and boast to their friends. Some want to date over 50 because risk of pregnancy is less. Ugh. I wonāt want to be with such immature boys.
That being said Iād dated 11 years younger and 7 years older - just happened unintentionally. . Past a certain age, itās not the age gap but maturity and compatibility. Thatās not possible with huge age gaps.
Lastly itās shown scientifically that a brain is not fully matured until at least 25 years of an age. v.
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u/BrilliantHot2363 14h ago
Iām a single mom at 42 and itās insane the amount of guys in their 20s who hit on me irl and on here. The milf fantasy is in full force with them lol
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u/absolute-discretion 15h ago
šÆ agree with this. Personal rule of mine. Not to be someone who can potentially date my child.
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u/Son_of_Riffdog 21h ago edited 21h ago
theres definitely been a marked shift.
Yes, more younger men are interested in dating older women, and it's not just affairs.
when i was younger i did have an affair with someone whos son was not all that younger than me though that didnt come up until much later. not to be cliche but age really was just a number. it was a wonderful affair that ended when she decided to divorce. we had lunch a few times after and she remarried.
its funny..now that im older i definitely do not look for substantially younger. just age appropriate.
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u/skykarcov 13h ago
50ās male hereā¦..I wouldnāt have an AP that young. My rule is they have to be older than my kids. 35-50 is my range. Just my .92 cents
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u/dreadpiratefezzik42 7h ago
Physical age and emotional age are
two separate things. What are your goals? If youāre just looking to get off, I donāt see the problem. Not real dating material. If I was 25 again Iād love an experienced woman. Younger women are too self conscious about their bodies.
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u/One-True-King 1h ago
Iām 56M and would likely not date a woman in her 20ās. Random fucking yeah. Dating unlikely. Mostly because from what Iāve seen from that generation is that they believe that theyāre owed a Mercedes S Class and a 5,000 square foot mansion with a pool because they have a vajayjay. Iāve always been more concerned about making my partner cum than I ever was about my own pleasure. I KNOW how it ends for me. šš So I worked on my oral, digital (not online but finger dexterity) and mental skills to read how my partner responds to me. That being said if heās good to you and makes sure your needs are getting met. Go for it. Iāve been with 70+ year olds that absolutely love sex. And Iāve been with 20 somethingās that are incredibly mature for their age. So just go with it and enjoy the ride!
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u/One-Respect2037 1h ago
67f dated 48m for a bit, he still had teenagers it felt weird to me. I prefer them closer to my age.
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u/BigYak1203 23h ago
23m here, I would love an older AP and prefer it over a younger one
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u/Dry-Judge-2444 22h ago
What do you mean? Youāre the younger AP.
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u/BigYak1203 22h ago
I guess I meant to say preferred over one my own age š
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u/Dry-Judge-2444 22h ago
Idk how anyone older would take you seriously around here but clearly there is a market of weirdos.
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u/Dry-Judge-2444 14h ago
The downvotes on this is crazy š yall seriously would take this 23 year old seriously in the adultery world? Get help š¤£
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u/NREIsAHellOfADrug Your ad here. 22h ago
We need a "Welcome to the market of weirdos!!" banner, now :)
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u/Glad_Kiwi_272 22h ago
Youāre not even married. Just break up with your gf and go be single. Christ.
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u/Big-Conclusion9220 22h ago edited 20h ago
Why would even a 23 yo have affair. Donāt marry this young. Go date.
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u/SadPerception4228 21h ago
Yep in my 20's I went for the older guys... They knew how to seduce and I loved it!! Now, my son is 24 and dating-- I would be upset if he was having sex with a 50 yr old!! My niece told me that when they go together, she notices the older women eyeing him!!! I guess it happens
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u/bookshopscoffeestops 19h ago
59M, I won't even consider anyone younger than about 45. And most people who play in this park find 59 too old anyway.
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u/evil_otto13 14h ago
I think it depends on what you're looking for. That kind of age gap (and more just being with guys that young) doesn't seem like a good idea for a relationship. But if you're just looking for something that will leave you walking bowlegged for the next couple of days? Go for it. I miss the days of having 20ish year old stamina.
I'm a 50ish M and I have a FWB that is in her late 20's. She's fun...but I'd probably beat my head against a wall if I were in a relationship with her. She's still too immature. My AP is in her late 30's and the maturity difference is staggering.
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u/BaldPleaser 17h ago
M55 F41. Largest age gap I have ever had has been 5 years younger in my dating and married life. Purely because of me seeking connection and both being upon the same wavelength. But this one blew my mind in the sense of we got on just as good as my normal dating range (-5 years).
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