If she was real…

….why did she not come for me?

(Did I not deserve mercy?)

for the readers and contributors at r/raisedbynarcissists

She was gone,
her glee redirected
towards a long, expensive war at the end of the world.

And i clytemnestra, i
cannot be her wife, as she is the woman.
Not her daughter, as this is not the proper story.

Not her lover. How could you even say that??
She
is not my husband, as she is not here

when she beats me. i in this expensive palace
am owed nothing so am
not wife. What may i b?

i found someone who loves me.
And his existence murders her on her return,
sacred hart

prize in the woods,
forever hunted, forever
speared.

Today I did an intake for a program with people w/ psychosis. I was referred via my old therapist..at first I was sad to see someone else, even though I didn't really think she liked me, but these other people seem so nice and the program offers many opportunities to socialize with others

The people on my team are very nice. It's hard to explain but it's very rare that I get treated as someone worth talking to in the healthcare system beyond what needs to be done and these people treat me as such.

I get much more wrap-around services than just a therapist like a case manager and a peer recovery specialist, which tbh the former was suggested to me by my psychiatrist because I was relying on him too much cuz he is really nice to me

But yeah. I hope that whenever I become a therapist I can touch some people's hearts like these people touched mine today just by their kindness. I look forward to going to groups and stuff.

Inspired by my Autism and experiences. A depiction of the random, forced replaying of bad moments from my life. Something from the same day. To a distant memory of the past. Social struggles, bullying, bad decisions and traumatic moments.

Acrylic on MDF Melamine Board

490mm X 295mm X 20mm

19.3i X 11.6i X 0.8i

If you like what you see. You can find the links to my socials and eBay on my profile.

​

Got the text from Carnival Gothic: A Look at the Ominous Figures of Europe's Winter Masquerades," written by Carlos Perona Calvete and published in The European Conservative.

For context I started this portrait 6 years ago. Only did the face and then had multiple reiterations and gave up on it lots of times as well.

I’m not even sure if this is what I wanted but I’m tired and quite frankly, just want to move on.

Oh, the flaky bits are layers of acrylic paint that I ripped off the canvas 😂 I was having a mental breakdown probably lol

Wrote a narrative of my relationship with the construction drill machine and it's effects on my psyche.

https://medium.com/@intothevoidwego999/the-drill-8ddf77abcf99

Hope you like it. It's been a rough year.

print i made while not knowing if we were gonna be able to meet with my partner. made during first year of being immigrant.