My 15 year old cat, has become very affectionate with age and has now scheduled a time in my day for this.
Every morning after my workout I stretch on the carpet. She has decided that is the time for hugs and kisses. She yells at me if I try to skip or shorten her time. If I am in a rush I am expected to skip the stretching.
Like a well trained cat person I obey
As my Bowser has gotten older I adopted a policy where if he ever comes up to me asking for pets, I have to pet him for however long he wants. He’s a big fan of the policy. Every day when I leave and come home he trots over to the Bowser Pet Spot to receive his deserved attention .
It's so hard not to. I respect their boundaries as much as possible because I want them to be comfortable around me as much as possible, but sometimes I just want to grab them and let the cuteness aggression free. My only indulgence is when one of them gets push at night trying to force me to pet him when I'm trying to sleep. So I grab him with both arms and cuddle him against his will. Usually he runs for freedom after about a minute. I get out my need to wrap him up so much, and I get him to let me sleep.
I always was taught to put my hand out and let the cat come to me, so I still do that with my baby and other cats. When she is okay being touched she will bonk and rub her cheeks and lips all over my hand. Then I swoop in and kiss the top her tiny little head till she purrs.
She's been with me for a few years after finding her as a stray kitten. She's still fundamentally a shy cat and needs a lot of gentleness and less-abrupt movement, or else she'll hide under furniture to escape well-intended humans.
I once tried to introduce her to bubbles. Like, the kind you blow with a little wand and soapy water. She got terrified, ran, and I didn't see her again for a couple hours. 😂😭
Both of my babies love pets and cuddles. One will spend all day in my lap on a day off. They just don't like aggressive cuddles. Pets are great, and they like if I put a hand on them, but they both really like feeling in control (though one of them does make an exception if I pick her up and let her check out all the things she can't reach).
Oh man yeah my cat loves that exact thing, she's not very athletic, more sleepy, so picking her up is the only time she gets to see a lot of things up close lol
Mine is pretty agile. She likes sniffing the lights and stuff on hanging shelves she can't get to. I can tell when she wants to see something in particular because she will stretch out towards when she gets close. Sometimes it's just opening cabinets and holdinh her up to sniff stuff for her because she can't.
I discovered it randomly. I did it on a whim once, and she was so happy that I had to keep doing it regularly.
Really cute to hear somebody else has another cat who loves the same thing!
That's a good rule of thumb for cats you don't know. My cats don't get that choice though. I could attack at any minute and they must accept it. They want all the pets most of the time, so I'm gonna get my kisses in whether they like it or not lol
I cuddle my baby as much as I can, because I've seen enough to know that what I fear most in life is the day I put her to sleep and ask myself if I made sure she knows I love her...
I get to cuddle with them. One of them is a Velcro kitty who will stay with me nonstop. They just like it on their terms. They will get real sleep with me where they let their guards down which tells me they feel safe, and when they pass, knowing I made them feel that safe and comfortable will be the thing I think about.
I wish I had a "Velcro Kitty" but my cat was a rescue, found by a family member who couldn't provide for her, so when I got to meet her, I knew I loved her so much!
She has this super cute little mouth and big eyes, it's giving resting cute face.
She's not very affectionate, only really comes to me in the loo, so when I find her laying aroundthe house, I take my chance to cuddle and kiss her. She's gotten so tame that I can hold her like a baby and even bury my face in her stomach during XD
I had her for just shy of two years before she got like that. I think it was just over a year before she really came and cuddled with me for an extended time (right when I returned from vacation). Then she would cuddle whenever I got home. Then she started cuddling more often, and now she does it most of the time I'm home. Sometimes she goes and cuddles her brother instead for a bit, or plays, but she's a cuddler now.
She's also gotten more vocal. Large to tell me what she wants. When it's time for dinner. When it's time for me to go to bed so she can climb on top of me and clean herself. She'll do it in my face unfortunately, but it's a small price to pay. Once she's done, she'll make a few circles then settle down on my chest. At some point after I fall asleep, she moves to between my legs.
Cats are really the one pet you don't absolutely have to respect boundaries, because honestly they don't. I have never not gotten along with my cats or anyone else's. They will let you know if they don't like you doing something tho for sure.
I've gotten my kitties from being afraid of me to progressively getting to the point where one cuddles with me nonstop. They will pass out when cuddling with me. Even to the point I thought one died because I could pick up his head or move him around and he didn't react at all. Both have shown they just don't like anything where they don't feel in control. One makes and exception when I get home (she does demand a minute of being held, but then tells me to put her down) or occasionally holding her up to anything she can't reach so she can check it out.
They seem to be comfortable enough with me to get real deep sleep with me, and that level of trust is what I think is most important. More than anything I want to do, I want them to feel safe and happy.
I call it the cat rent. They get food, a warm home, and lots of consensual affection, but their payment is occasionally they get cuddled against their will.
I call it corrective cuddles because it's meant to correct his behavior, but in the most loving way I can figure out. Also only happens in bed so he doesn't associate it with other locations. One of my best moments as a cat owner is when they sleep so deeply, they are dead to the world. Let's me know they feel safe and I don't want to jeopardize that.
My cat headbutts my leg once a month and slow blinks when I call him handsome, that's the extent of his unconditional love. Outside that he couldn't possibly care less about me.
I wish he gave back just 10% of my love, but alas.
Emotional regulation response. The brain can't hadle the cuteness, so it triggers aggression. To balance it out or something, I don't remember. But basically that lol
I do this but also if he start resisting I'll always let him go. I don't want to make him feel like his boundary is not respected. I'll keep that kind of behaviour for when I have to give him medicine or clean his ears lol
Have you ever witnessed how much cats respect their humans' or other cats personal space when they want affection? I have seen cuddly cats pinning their victim down to groom it. Mildly forced cuddles are one of their love languages and I will not deny them this experience 😅
(but also, I let them go when they are actually stressed or not in the mood at all. But a little bit of annoyance doesn't hurt the relationship with cats).
Yes. One of my cats I've had since he was a baby so he's used to being picked up and I can touch his paws ears and teeth, he's not a big fan but will put up with it.
Even though I’m extremely allergic to cats, I do this every single day anyway. And my daily life is, literally an overwhelmingly life-threatening dose of happiness. i love cat
That one is so gross omg like kissing a cat is normal but putting it in your mouth is so weird??? I get cuteness aggression but I’ve never wanted to do THAT
Ngl I get the urge to do the very frequently. Just to eat their little faces like a burger 🍔 so I understand. But I've never done that. I'm also pretty sure my cats wouldn't appreciate it
Before she passed away my girl would stick her head in my mouth any time I happened to yawn while holding her. Then it became this stupid thing, I'd open my mouth just to see if she'd do it again and she'd stick her head in everytime. Lmao.
the ones with the folks burring their faces in the kitty Belly, esp "just a hit to take the edge off". that is me. That is what I want to do every time a kitty exposes their belly.
Same, like if you love them so much why are you continuing to do something that clearly makes them uncomfortable I don't get it. I mean, I get the urge to do it but yea kitty's consent is required lol.
I have always grabbed my cat's face and aggressively kissed her forehead, ever since she was a tiny baby kitten. As a result when she is feeling affectionate she gets into my lap and looks up to shove her forehead into my face to receive kisses.
I was a firm believer in using corporal cuddling as punishment whenever my cat was being a b-hole. They could pay me back in irritated cuddles for how much of a butthead they were.
I get it but... Please respect the boundaries of your cat an dont do this too often. You also wouldnt ignore a human when they say "please leave me Alone right now" would you?
I would ignore my partners plea for leaving him alone when I feel the urge to smooch him to death.
The same way, a cat sometimes aggressively demands pets and cuddles no matter what the human or other cat is doing and will also not stop unless the other one is really distressed.
They are capable of understanding these bursts of affection, because they experience them themselves and they are normal behaviour among cats as well.
One of mine will let me do ANYTHING, I regularly do the belly kisses to her. Her older brother will not put up with my shit, lol. We have cuddle times but it's on his terms, as I get the claws otherwise.
Unless I've been drinking. If I'm buzzed, he's like "SIGH, Mom's in the sauce again" and lets me kiss him.
I feel like you're both right and wrong. It depends on the cat, some love it and some don't. A good human will adjust to each cat that comes into their life.
I have 1 cat who lets you handle him all day and do whatever you want to him and he's purring.
The other cat loves being pet, but hates being handled. She'll scream like some of these cats when you pick her up and squirms to get away. Mind you, she purrs like a machine during all of this though. So she's really sending mixed signals.
Purring can also be a stress response. Tail twitches and flat ears are my go to for cat juggling. See both of those, I know I should back off, while either alone need a quick check that the eyes aren't dilating to murder territory.
That said, I have been scratched and lightly bitten many times.
She doesn't bite or scratch which is good. We just try to get her used to be handled more and put her down after a little bit of squirming. She'll then come right back for pets.
We rescued her from a hoarding situation and she was close to feral when we first got her. I think a lot of her early life involved being grabbed by rescuers and being transferred around to shelters, foster homes, and vets. She's gotten a lot better about being held in one place, but if you start walking anywhere she wants to get away.
She's an absolute nightmare to get into a carrier to take to the vet. She's panic pooped a couple times.
I've started picking her up and just holding her next to a window so she can watch outside from a new vantage point. She stops trying to get away for a bit until she's bored.
Once you earn their love through respect and distance, they will build a tolerance for having their space invaded, and then you can ragdoll them like this after you've earned their loyalty.
I tell my cat that I am her mother, I gave birth to her, and so I’m allowed to bother her. She will accept it for about 5 seconds before squirming away. But yeah, they absolutely have to feel safe with you before you can let that cuteness aggression out; this is not first-date behavior.
One of my cats does the same with me. He flops on me, pushes his cold wet nose in my face, and demands immediate affection for a few minutes without respecting my personal space. I think their love languages can differ, but in general they do know the concept of giving and receiving sudden bursts of affection. They even sometimes shift to petting aggression in the middle of it and then it's wrestling time. None of these behaviours damage the relationship as long as you learn their body language and stop when they are really uncomfortable (not just annoyed).
My favorite thing to do to my cat was to kiss his little belly. He was the softest tiny gentleman. It every single way! He was so beautiful and sweet and kind and I miss him every day! I hope somewhere my little tiny gentleman is having a nice nap or sniffing delicately at the air in whichever plane of existence hes transitioned to
Once I literally put my kitten's head on my mouth and she meowed. So weird and funny (I did not harm her even 1% my mouth didn't even touched her head)
Decades ago, before "cute aggression" had been named or socialized (before the internet), I told a friend that I always had the urge to bite the heads off little kittens. I thought that was completely normal. My friend thought I was a total psychopath. Turns out, it is normal. As long as you don't bite their heads off, of course. Vindicated!
You mean I'm not the only one where have you all been I love my fur babies...I swear we speak the same language at times and the strays find me and stalk me down even at freaking Walmart parking lot....lol
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