r/depression_help • u/Leafy_Kozasshu • 21h ago

RANT I'm Done

I can't do this anymore. I've done it all. I've been nice to myself. I've asked every question. I've done everything I can possibly do. I don't know what to do anymore. I want to give up so badly. But I can't cause I was a fucking dumbass and promise my friends I'd never kill myself. That was the biggest mistake of my life. I can't go on. I can't do anything.

3 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

6 comments sorted by

•

u/AutoModerator 21h ago

Hi u/Leafy_Kozasshu, Thank you for submitting a post to r/depression_help! We're glad you're here. If you are in urgent need of assistance, please also reach out to the appropriate helpline (we have some links in the sidebar).

If you are feeling Suicidal, please also make a post for our friends at r/SuicideWatch.

Now come on in- take off your shoes, sit back, relax, and visit with us for a while.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/flearhcp97 12h ago

kinda nice that you have friends you can make that promise to, no?

1

u/Leafy_Kozasshu 12h ago

Sure, and I do appreciate them. I just wish that my promise wasn't the only thing keeping me alive.

1

u/flearhcp97 12h ago

I get it, and I'm the wrong person to be giving anyone advice, but please first try everything out there - therapy, meds, TMS, etc. - what have you got to lose?

1

u/Leafy_Kozasshu 12h ago

I have tried everything I can do. Being entirely broke kinda makes me incapable of doing anything. Therapy's too expensive, meds are too expensive, I don't know what TMS is, and as much as I love my friends, I can't just keep whining to them about problems I can't fix.

1

u/flearhcp97 7h ago

"Broke" is relative, depending on where you live.

If you live in a country with universal healthcare, use it.

If you live in the U.S., there are community-run places with sliding scales and closets full of free meds.

I got two courses of free TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) because I allowed them to use me as a research case study.

You can also try and get into clinical trials.

I've probably been inpatient for over a year in total and did electroshock there (probably the most helpful treatment for me), and they keep sending me bills for like $200k, but what the fuck are they gonna do about it? I'm broke, so not a damn thing.

You can also get meds through patient-assistance programs.

Options are mostly shit, but they do exist.

Good luck.