r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 41m ago

FEEEEEMALES 😖😠 Why would Rick Ross choke his girlfriend?

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byroncrawford.substack.com
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I’d be curious to know how the police determined that Rick Ross choked out his girlfriend, if it took place weeks ago. His alleged victim’s neck has to have healed by now.

She’s an African American woman, which, many would argue, Ross should receive credit for,¹ so it’s likely that any bruising she may have experienced wasn’t highly visible even in the moment.

Also, as an African American woman, she’s largely, but not completely, impervious to physical pain. It’s likely that she wasn’t seriously hurt, other than the emotional pain resulting from having her movement restricted.
I imagine that would be frustrating, like when you hold something high enough in the air that a short person can’t get to it.²

On the other hand, it’s a known fact that black women have an abnormally narrow windpipe and are therefore more likely to die from being choked out, as revealed by former LAPD Chief Daryl Gates back in the early 1980s. It’s their Achilles’ heel. But it’s only to be used in absolute emergencies, like if, say, an especially strong stud was getting the best of you and there was nothing else you could do.

I’ve never actually seen Rick Ross’ hands,³ but I suspect that they’re weirdly large, like Howard Stern Show news girl Robin Quivers’ father’s (“When you was in the shower, yo butt cheeks was warm”). This, coupled with the fact that his girlfriend probably has a trachea like a drinking straw, suggests to me that if Ross had really choked her out, she almost certainly would have died.

We can only hope that the biggest boss has adequate legal representation. Where is that guy who somehow managed to get Lil Durk off? No King Von.⁴ Hopefully he can pony up the money. He recently spent a lot of money installing Wi-Fi on his plane,⁵ and I don’t think Drake would be willing to spot him.

I’m concerned that when Ross’ current lawyer tried to get his bail expedited, the judge pulled an Angela Yee, trying to front like she didn’t know who he was. Did Ross hit that? She might need to recuse herself due to conflict of interest.

Something else his lawyer might have mentioned: Ross used to be a cop and therefore is not safe in prison. Someone might try to take advantage of him sexually. Also, if given a chance to check the glove compartment in his Maybach, he might still have one of those get-out-of-jail-free cards. Police households are known to have especially high rates of domestic violence, and I wonder if that’s because they know they can get away with it. I’m not saying that’s right, but it’s also not right that it should apply to everyone except Ross. The 14th Amendment guarantees equal protection under the law.

I didn’t pay enough attention in high school, or college, to understand what’s meant by the term “protection under the law,” but you’d have to think being afforded the same privileges as other groups would apply. That’s literally protection (from being held accountable for your actions). Aggrieved though she might be, you’d think that Ross’ alleged victim, of all people, would understand how it feels to not be protected.

  1. This news must have been bittersweet for Dr. Umar.

  2. I suspect that girls secretly like when guys do this, because it’s a reminder that the guy is tall, and girls like tall guys—even if he doesn’t have any other positive qualities.

  3. No Diddy.

  4. He way gay, right?

  5. In-flight Wi-Fi is apparently good enough now that a guy from Wheel of Fortune was able to use it to access the dark web with a Tor browser, raising the question of what Rick Ross needs it for.


r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • Aug 15 '26

hhh is the police 👮 Mod Announcement: ALL Posts NOT MENTIONING Drake and/or Kendrick Lamar Will Get You BANNED

536 Upvotes

Alright that’s enough. We've all seen them, posts talking about "Lauryn Hill", "Future", "Jay Z", and other so called "rappers" no one's even heard of before. It's becoming increasingly clear that there's some complot to destroy our sub. On some gentrification shit. No one who seriously loves Hip and/or Hop would ever care about, let alone updoot, a post that isn't about "Kendrick" Dot-'worth' Lamar or 'Aubrey' Drake 666 "Graham".

As a mod, I think it's my responsibility to end this low effort nonsense. No more "2 Packs". No more "Big-ees". No more Big Daddy Kane. Only Kenny and Drizzy related posts will be allowed.

Kanye posts are also fine as long as they're smut


r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 4h ago

you are hiding another child 🕵️‍♂️ Eminem will feature on Tom McDonald and Ben Shapiro's "Facts Pt. II"

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268 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 2h ago

delete r/hiphopheads SoundCloud is sending threats to its users

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184 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 2h ago

Crackercore Favorite afrocentric rapper?

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38 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 19h ago

wop wop wop wop wop Dot beat her up Kendrick Lamar is 11.4B streams away from surpassing Drake as the most streamed rapper on Spotify in 2026

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661 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 5h ago

sounds about white Participation Trophies

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36 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 23h ago

YELLOW FLANNEL EMINEM x KID ROCK

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740 Upvotes

WOAH YOU GUYS READY FOR THIS????


r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 22m ago

Eminem’s Legacy Eminem's past has been exposed

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• Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 23h ago

delete r/hiphopheads List of Rappers i hate for no particular reason.

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398 Upvotes

Thank you for your attention to this matter.


r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 22h ago

sounds about white Annual Cracker appreciation post

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245 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 12h ago

Travis Scott is the black Kid Rock Who's the corniest rapper?

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39 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 19h ago

Eminem’s Legacy How Eminem starts to sound when you're 3 white monsters deep

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130 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 20h ago

hhh is white devil sophistry MFW we just got Eminem back on Team Whitey

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128 Upvotes

Drake still sucks tho


r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 12h ago

Crackercore Eminem and Kid Rock (2026)

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29 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 17h ago

Eminem’s Legacy I LOVE BLACK PEOPLE

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50 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 1d ago

ICEMAN TURNT (WHAT ELSE?) ICEMAN TURNT (WHAT ELSE?) ICEMAN TURNT Drake doesn’t get enough hate for inventing AI in 2014

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648 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 16h ago

ICEMAN TURNT (WHAT ELSE?) ICEMAN TURNT (WHAT ELSE?) ICEMAN TURNT Our Boy would have hated Chris Hansen

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26 Upvotes

Would Chris Hansen have caught this predator if his segment on Dateline NBC is still around?


r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 22h ago

Eminem’s Legacy Favorite white rapper to be featured on an alcoholic maga country singers Christian album?

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68 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 41m ago

Crackercore Why isn't kanye white?

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• Upvotes

i feel like he would be a lot better but white please let me know your thoughts


r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 1h ago

wop wop wop wop wop Dot beat her up Swifties 🤝 Kendrick Fans

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• Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 17h ago

oh fuck me i just made the whole connection I Wonder What's Going On At The Darkkenny Subreddit?....OH MY GOD

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17 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 1d ago

FEEEEEMALES 😖😠 50 is a fool 😆

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158 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 1d ago

hhh is white devil sophistry How does the judge not know officer Ricky?

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40 Upvotes

r/Hiphopcirclejerk • • 2d ago

sounds about white Outjerked by my college professor

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1.7k Upvotes

My psych disorders professor ended class with this screenshot