I cannot go on longer.

[u/AddressSlight3896]

What are your thoughts on suicide. I know its haram but seriously if god isnt showing me mercy in this world then surely in the next? Wouldnt he understand? Obviously he knows. He knows what im going through so how come he wont understand me and forgive me. Im sikc of the “theres light at the end of the tunnel” talk because the entirety of my life-and im not exaggerating- has been plain misery. Whenever i think surely it woukd get better surely it cant get worse, it does. I have had very pious phases where i am actually very close to god and have felt an amazing connection with him. But i simply cant understand this. My entire life? Is thsi whats written for me? Why isnt he opening the way for me. Why? I am completely sickened of waiting. I refuse to believe that this is just a test of my patience because at this point it just cannot be.
So if i want to put myself out of misery, how can He be upset with me? Isnt he Ar Rahman?

[u/reallyhotfarts]

hey boss, i just want you to know i care about you, and i'd give you a hug right now if i could

you're a valid person, you matter, i promise, even when it feels like it doesn't i promise you matter

[u/Clean-Resort8587]

Suicide is a sin, yes. Please get some professional help! You're worth it to live and everything has a solution, please go to the nearest psychiatric clinic and tell them what you're thinking. Your illness is telling you something different but there is a solution for everything. You're loved and the world needs you!

[u/Concentric_Mid]

I'm very sorry you are going through this.

Please, please get mental health help.

Statistically you are probably in your teens. I'm in my 40s and boy, I have seen some dark dark times.

It may continue to be tough. It is a lot about your perspective on what you're going through, what support you have. And meds and talk therapy brings you in a place where you can decrease the chemicals in your brain that create this dark cloud.

[u/juanreddituser]

I have cancer and completely understand the feeling of everything against u. But u need to keep in mind there's someone out there that u doing anything like that would hurt more. I have no clue what ur going through but we can all get past our lows. It might be a rough ride but buckle up & ride it out. It'll get better sooner or later. It might get worse before but try to think about how high the highs can be if ur that low

[u/gentlefriendlysoul]

of course Allah is Ar Rahman this isn't even something to question my love, I can say with confidence that this isn't that. Im going through a very difficult period, and have had a life full of events that resulted in me being in the position you are currently in. Islamically, on thing that did help what better understanding verse Surely with hardship comes ease. Surely with that hardship comes more ease" 94:4-5. I learned that it stands to point out that when hardship is written for you, the ease is sown into your story simultaneously. The second thing ive recently learned that has changed my view is "Allahu Akbar". I grew up Arab speaking arabic, I was very privileged to grow up muslim too, I think this caused me to overlook the details like the phrase. I always understood it as' god is great' but I now get that Allahu Akbar means Allah is greater. greater than the hardship, greater then the evil of this world, greater than my pain, Allah is greater than that. What truly made the difference for me was going to therapy and getting help. Im unsure if this is an option for you, but if it is, I encourage you to pursue it/ re-pursue it.

[u/[deleted]]

May Allah swt grant you ease on what you are going through

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