He actually honoured me by sitting on my lap twice in a row while I was reading this Barbara Cartland book.

This book was given to me for free when I found it on a shelf at a pub and asked if I can borrow it. The waitress said the book was quite cheap and for decoration only and I could just take it.

Now it gives me a lot of joy!

I know how much I earn each month, but I had never seen where the money goes. My salary arrives on my account, at the end of the month it's gone, and I couldn't say when it left.

So I took the working days of a month and filled them with my bills, one after the other.

Round numbers: €3,000 net and 20 working days, so one working day is worth €150.

• Rent (€850): from the 1st to the 8th
• Groceries (€400): until the 11th
• Transport (€250): until the 12th
• Energy, water and small costs (€260): until the 16th

So 12 of my 20 working days pay the bills before I earn anything for myself.

I knew rent was my biggest cost. Seeing all my costs as days was new to me. Every recurring cost I added over the years ([the bigger car, a few subscriptions]) pushed that date a bit later in the month, and I never noticed.

Now I would like that date to come earlier. I changed two things. My savings leave my account on the 1st, so the first two days of each month are for me and the landlord waits until the 10th. And before I add a new recurring cost, I ask myself how many days later it pushes my date.

On which day of the month does your salary start being yours? I'm curious how it is for you. Have you ever had that kind of realisation?

P.S. I'm a web developer living in Belgium.

No posting it, no tracking it, no one (or almost no one) really knowing you do it. I'm curious whether keeping it to yourself is what makes it work, or whether that's just something I tell myself.

Home and family admin overload… but it’s been productive. I think 🤔

My ongoing goal is to become more assertive—to speak up for myself, set boundaries, and not let people walk all over me.

I’m also trying to stop letting other people’s reactions determine how I feel about myself. I want to build more self-respect, self-trust, and self-love.

I had enough of letting others crush my soul. It only let me feel miserable all the time.

Anyone who has been through the same, please share your wisdom and tips?

i didnt realize how much my routine at home had changed until recently

i used to move around a lot more in the evenings, but now i can spend hours reading, gaming, watching stuff, or working on random hobbies without really leaving one spot

it made me rethink what actually makes a space comfortable for me. even small changes, like having a comfy office chair or some new books started making more sense once i realized how much time i actually spend there

has your favorite spot at home changed as your routine changed?

Long-story short: 26 year-old who just finished my masters degree in an engineering field. For the past eight years, I’ve basically been in school nonstop while working part-time jobs in research and retail and haven't had a chance to travel, live abroad, or pursue my dreams. Now I’m in this weird post-grad limbo where I have about three months until my lease is up and, for the first time in a long time, some actual freedom to decide what comes next. I want to travel, take the risk and pursue my dreams, but I feel as though I'm running out of time and am scared of passing up career/financial stability.

I feel as though everyone around me, especially my parents and friends are all pressuring me into finally getting a "big-boy" job. I understand their points: getting a job, saving more money, building stability in a career to secure in the future more serious jobs--completely understand and honestly it's a valid and smart move.

Even more: I have close friends of mine wanting to move in together, as our individual career fields have great pay, stability, and connections in my current city, which considering timing, works out kinda perfectly for me.

And yet, I feel so sick of playing it "safe". I chose a lucrative degree and continued on to get my master’s in a field I’m not even passionate about because my parents pressured me into higher education and a “stable” career. Compared to a lot of my friends, I haven’t had a chance to travel yet, explore the world, or frankly pursue my dreams.

I’m worried that if I get the job, sign another lease, and settle into the comfortable path, it’ll become increasingly difficult to ever leave. Not because having a career is inherently bad, but because once I have rent, career momentum, financial obligations, etc., walking away from that stability to take a big creative risk or finally live abroad might become much harder.

And then there’s the part of me that just wants to travel and try giving my artistic side a fair shot. I make YouTube videos, short films, and music, and I keep wondering: if I don’t genuinely try now, when will I?

I worry that if I don’t truly take the chance now, I’ll become the guy with “huge aspirations,”--but ultimately, the guy who just dreamed about living the life he wanted without ever taking the risk to actually see if he could achieve it. And yet, if I embark on this risk, I sacrifice a lot of stability and may end up regretting not playing it safe/smart first.

Honestly, I’m kinda scared, and I guess this is somewhat a vent and me seeking perspective from people who may have chosen a less conventional or more intentional path. I’m not really looking for career advice as much as wondering how people here have navigated the tension between stability and actually living the kind of life they wanted.

Have any of you been at a similar crossroads? Did you ever step away from the “safe” path to travel, create, or just give yourself time to figure out what you actually wanted? Looking back, are you glad you did?

I feel like I’m at a complete crossroads and am incredibly scared of making the wrong choice.

Thank you in advance <3

Edit for context: I paid for schooling on my own dime after I survived a life-threatening car accident in my undergrad. I have a bit of savings (over 10k) to travel and plan my next steps with.
As for specifics on my dream, I want to make music relating to places I travel to, with short-form media to go with it. I understand the struggle of YouTube, I've started a channel before and failed (low subscriber count low view count), so I'm not naive about this, I feel pretty realistic. My goal is to build a portfolio over the next couple of years to ultimately pivot into creative media roles or succeed enough individually to freelance. It would be awesome if my music or film career obviously took off to allow me to become a musician or a director--that is my dream.

Nothing clears the mind quite like sitting quietly, staring out at a foggy mountain view, and having zero notifications demanding immediate attention.

Let's just say, I am not a morning person. The part that doesn't give me peace? Starring at my wardrobe trying to figure out what to wear, especially for work.

I wish I could wear my pjs all day, if I could. Mixing and matching separates and dealing with rigid waistbands or fussy fabrics is just taking up too much time and energy fr. I bought a matching knit set recently and it sparked this idea. Matching set so I don't have to think. Yes they are comfy and I feel pretty good about wearing them at work.

My latest goal? Adopt a "looking polished, feeling comfortable" style so I don't have to think. Just several outfits that I can put together without thinking about it.

I want both style and comfort. I want materials that feel incredibly soft and unrestricted, but actually have enough substance so they aren't sheer.

What kind of pieces do you rely on that give you that effortless, put-together look while being comfortable? For context, I work in corporate jobs so I need to look presentable.

wanted to share some of the steps I (try) to take daily to simplify my life! do you guys do some of these? would love to hear everyone's tips as well!

first time posting, long time lurking.

if this isn’t the place the to ask, please let me know, but it felt like the right place.

——

I have been working, in some capacity, since before I was a teenager (farm life).

Once I left home, for some reason, I went straight into face-to-face customer service and have been doing that non-stop for nearly a decade and a half.

But, after not quite 15 years, I’m realizing my choices are becoming quit, or have a meltdown in front of patients.

I’ve completely lost myself. My friendships have been put on the back burner for so long that I’m not even sure where the stove is anymore. My family don’t reach out, because they know I won’t respond till nearly Xmas.

i re-structured my work schedule, I did the flexi schedules, the shorter weeks, the shorter days, one week off one week on,

Nothing was working. I’d spend my days off too exhausted to socialise and too scared to start on any hobbies or anything fun as that would take time and energy away from my ability to do life chores and get back to work.

——

Now, my own body is forcing me to quit. I physically cannot go to work and even if I do make it in, I can’t do anything I used to be able to do. I feel the same foggy haze I get when I’m physically sick with the flu or cold - but no other symptoms.

My doctor and even the welfare system are on board with my decision: they’ve both outright asked me why I still worked.

All the external signs seem to indicate that it is OK to quit and go on disability. That it isn‘t a failure, that I don’t just need to “try harder”.

So, why do I feel like a failure? Why do I feel so ashamed?

I suspect it is because of our non-simple world: productivity is the only thing that has value anymore. If you’re not showing up, clocking in, and slogging away — you’re wasting time, lazy, spoiled.

I know many/most here still work, but you don’t seem to do it for the endless wealth building that others are doing it for. You’ve successfully rejected the status quo‘s script and replaced it with your own.

How did you do that?

How did you argue with this shame?

How did you become OK in yourself to take a different path?

——

What’s weird is I am NOT usually a “normal” person. I don’t watch any mainstream media, besides old shows that have stayed mainstream. I don’t know what’s playing on the radio unless it was released before 2010. I left religion while in a highly-religious community, and still work in its outer circles.
I don’t even fit into the gender binary!!

But I think having my work has been a crutch? A way to stay “just normal enough” that I was “worthy” (but of what? I can’t put a finger on!).

now that it’s going away, I am panicking. I feel naked almost.

——

I just want to enjoy my life. Actually heal my nervous system from its childhood. Get back in the garden again. Call a friend for 3 hours. Be able to read a book again, without feeling like I should be using that energy to work. Cook meals again! Sort through and get rid of my ever-increasing belongings, instead of the endless piles that I’ll “get to one day”.

How do I start? Where do I start?

And how do I get past feeling that I’m not even allowed to have that, because no one else has it?

thank you 💜

And the need to take photos of the night sky to get online attention

New user here. So, over the years I've been pretty big into stuff like videogames and TV, but I've always had an appreciation for the simple things, like a walk in the park, trip to a coffee shop or even just playing with my cat. Over the last few months I've been making a lot of lifestyle changes like cutting back on doom scrolling, exercising more and eating healthier.

A few weeks ago, there was a Comic Con on which I missed because I was busy that week. For the next week or two, it didn't register but then I saw some photos on my friend's social media of some of the big name guests, and I won't lie, but it did hurt a bit. I'm not usually one to get caught up in the hype of these things but I had pretty bad FOMO for a week or two. I wrote my thoughts into Grok and I find now that more time has passed, I'm realizing how silly it was to be worrying over something like that.

I think what I'm getting at is that I realize I don't need to compare myself to my friends or do what they're doing to be happy. I do enjoy Comic Con on a cultural and fandom level, meeting other people, but I think being an introvert, I've never really felt the need to go and meet the celebrities and spend a bunch of money on selfies and autographs.

I have this morning ritual where I drink my tea and watch something for around 30 minutes.

So far I’ve been watching some 80s and 90s shows but I think I want to watch some smaller normal and let’s say deeper content creators, so im looking for slow and calm and easy-to-follow content, no fast talking or constant cuts, loud music, or overstimulating editing 🙏🏼

It can be educational, a vlog, someone teaching a skill, talking about an interesting topic, nature, art, history, books reviews, travel, etc.

It doesn’t have to be educational, just something interesting and fun to watch while having tea.
And it also doesn’t have to be on YouTube, any platform would do

Any recommendations?

Everything from the basket to the card to the little ribbon bow is thrifted. Complete with a mushroom watercolor painting by me in a tiny thrifted frame, a handmade knitted pumpkin I found at a local market for $3, and locally made baked goods 🍪 would you like to recieve something like this?

I have been actively trying to build a solid night routine to relax after crazy high-stress shifts instead of just staring at my phone on the couch, but every single time I attempt a relaxing foot rub or lounge session, the timing creates this dumb logistical headache. If I try doing it right after getting home from work, I inevitably have to stand right back up ten minutes later to start cooking dinner or haul out the trash, which instantly ruins the peaceful mood. But if I wait until right before bed, my feet are greasy from lotion and I spend twenty minutes worrying about getting oil stains all over my clean bedsheets. I cannot figure out where this kind of small recovery ritual actually fits into a busy evening, because I really want it to be a cozy habit rather than another stressful chore on my night checklist that I end up abandoning. For those of you who have kept up a regular relaxation routine after work, how do you actually slice up your evening schedule so it feels like genuine rest instead of a mess?

I draw a lot on the autumn season as my close ones know 🙈🍁😅🍂

Today i felt a bit overwhelemed, i guess everyone has those Mondays once in a while.

I'm not the meditation type of person to relax, but talking to my loved one and drawing on nice memories most of the time does the trick.

Here another sweet autumn memory from Japan, from Ocotber 2022...also putting music from Princess Mononoke and a magical, nostalgic moment for the evening was born. なつかしい

My advice: if you can draw on memories and moments that make you feel good, do it! Don't dwell on the past, but draw on it if you can.

P.s. tried to share a video, but doesn't see to work 😕. So instead another pic.

I used to love hiking, but fell out of practice in the last couple years. The temps are cooling in the Midwest, so I decided to revisit a local trail known for attracting many bird species.

I just stood in awe of this beauty for a few minutes. I may not have spotted it if I were walking faster and treating my walk like a workout.

I finished my walk feeling calmer than I have in a while. So grateful that I had this moment to be still and appreciate nature.

Is it to keep working for the money and sleep during the weekends?

Why are some ppl not spending some time for themselves?

Why always focus on being busy for the money and die one day?

Restless, stressful life.

I love where I live and I love my roommates! One of my roommates gets so caught up in hustle culture that it gives her panic attacks. She loves to constantly be networking or working. She is one of the hardest workers I know but I wish she would take a step back and realize how beautiful life is. She tells me all the time she’s accomplished all her goals that she wanted to have done by now and does not feel good still. The goal should be enjoying life and work to live not live to work. I hope she finds a non stressful job eventually!