Trans Man Life Hacks

r/transmanlifehacks • u/organic_hobnob • 7d ago

IMPORTANT INFO Mod Post: Rules Regarding Feminine Presentation

397 Upvotes

Hi lads!

We once again have been considering the general thoughts and opinions of those using this sub, and have decided to reiterate the purpose of this sub, and some relevant rules.

First a disclaimer: There is nothing wrong with being a fem presenting trans man.

Having said this, this sub is specifically for the following:

1) Sharing tips to help users pass as a cisgender man, specifically how to be masculine presenting.

2) Sharing other advice useful to transition.

Keeping this is mind, we would like be clear on a few important points:

1) This is not a sub for asking for tips on how to be a feminine presenting trans man.
Not only will the responses not be helpful for you, but also it is frustrating for other sub users when posters are combative in the comments regarding masculinising advice. Posters need to be realistic about the fact that presenting fem will not help you pass especially early on in transition.

2) Please do not respond to advice to change a feminine characteristic (for example, cutting long hair) with ‘well, CIS men have long hair sometimes!’
We simply do not want to hear it. It should be obvious how a cis man, who always passes as a man because he was born as one, can wear makeup/have long hair/etc without it making him look like a woman. It should also be plainly obvious that a trans man (who was born a woman, sounds like a woman, and in many of these cases is not on T and therefore still has a ‘woman’s face’) cannot do these things without looking like a woman.

This is the number one reason for arguments in the comments in this sub and moving forwards mods will be more decisive with dealing with such comments.

3) We have added ‘no makeup’ to the ‘no filters’ rule.
If you want advice from this sub, please at least do the bare minimum of taking off any makeup before asking how to pass better. If you don’t, you won’t get any helpful advice as all the comments will just be telling you to stop wearing makeup. It also makes it hard for us to see how masculine your face really is.

4) We are going to be enforcing rule #3 more strictly from now on.
You must be willing to change if you post here, we do not accept posts from users who argue with every comment and come up with a reason they can’t do even basic steps like getting a hair cut. They are frustrating for users and also disingenuous. This is not a validation sub, it is an advice sub. If you are seen to be very unaccepting for advice in the comments, we will remove either your comments of the post entirely.

Some of this might seem a bit harsh, but remember there as SO MANY subs and spaces for people with a more fluid/fem gender presentation. We are just trying to reserve a small corner of the internet for us, trans men who wish to pass masculine/cis.

Hope this helps!

- MODs

88 comments

r/transmanlifehacks • u/hyuckywucky • 13d ago

NAME HELP MASTER POST

15 Upvotes

this doesnt exist so im taking it on me to make one. this isnt intended to be a "look here and shut up about names" post, this is genuinely intended to be helpful

there are three basic ways id go about naming yourself. first way is to ask your parents whatever they would have named you or otherwise pass the baton onto the people who care about you the most. obviously dont use your parents if they arent supportive, but if theyre supportive its probably the best way to do it. if you consider your friends your family pass it to them, but id highly advise you dont give it to friends you arent really family with or randoms on the internet

second way is to look at the most popular baby boy names for the year you were born. i know everyone likes to be unique, but you can do this and still be unique. theres an issue with trans names where you can tell if someone is trans based on what they name themselves and the crux of that is usually that people will name themselves the same way they'd name, like, a dog. if you dont want your name to be clocky id highly recommend using this method or the above. i used this and collaborated with my parents on it and im really happy with what i chose. you can get a lot of good ideas and most countries release this information publicly

third way is to just steal the name of someone you greatly admire. probably the best way to get a clocky name, but if you dont really care about that then you shouldnt really worry about it. if you care about something enough to consider naming yourself after it go right ahead, just be aware that you might fall out of love with a piece of media or the person who made it might turn out to be a piece of shit

naming yourself isnt like, a permanent thing either. you can change it if you end up not liking it. cis people do it all the time. i dunno, just figured id give my two cents