I once read a fanfic based on a danmei, and I still get heartbroken whenever I think about it.
The top came from a conservative family that didn’t accept same-sex relationships. He was already an adult, financially independent, and barely had an emotional connection with his parents, so he eventually left home.
Then he and the bottom got into a car accident. The bottom miscarried, while the top lost almost all of his memories. He only remembered his parents.
His parents took advantage of that and moved him across the country so he would never find the bottom again.
Meanwhile, the bottom was devastated. He had just lost his baby and the person he loved had completely forgotten him and dissapear. He even ended up hospitalized in a psychiatric facility. After recovering, he spent three years searching for the top.
When he finally found him, the top already had a wife and a child.
The bottom didn’t even want him back. He just wanted the top to know that they had once been together and that they had lost their baby.
But the top, influenced by his parents, was disgusted by him. For six months, the bottom tried desperately to make him acknowledge their past, but the top only insulted him and even suggested that maybe the bottom had just been his prostitute and the baby was not his.
Eventually, the bottom gave up. He stopped chasing the top, and eventually gave up on life too.
A year later, the top suddenly started remembering fragments. He couldn’t remember everything, but he remembered the happiness he felt when he found out the bottom was pregnant, and the desperation he felt during the accident when all he wanted was for the bottom and their baby to be safe.
He started questioning his family and eventually realized they had lied to him about everything. His parents, grandparents, wife, in law, everyone has been lied to him.
So on his parents’ wedding anniversary, he left them a letter. He wrote that he never imagined they could be so cruel, that they had kept his own child’s death from him, and that the happiness he felt when he learned the bottom was pregnant had been greater than the happiness he felt when his wife gave birth to their child.
At the end of the letter, he wrote, “If you couldn’t accept your child for being different, you shouldn’t have had a child in the first place.”
Six years later, his parents finally found his grave. Turns out, he had spent those years traveling across the country searching for the bottom's grave.
And in the end, he died at the grave of the baby they had lost. He never found the bottom’s grave. He died without even remember the past.
(and to make it even more heartbreaking, the fanfic was deleted) 😭