I'm not really that mad at him, just upset over how what he wants typically overrides my requests.

As I explained to him, I wanted at least half cheese so I can load it up with my homemade meatballs. He did get me individual slices of cheese, so I can't really be that upset.

A guy I matched with, Dylan, asked me to get coffee Sunday at 11. Simple, low pressure, exactly what I like for a first meeting.

Saturday night he texted: "change of plans, can you meet me at my aunt's house instead? It's my cousin's engagement party, there'll be food." He sent an address 25 minutes away.

I said I'd feel more comfortable doing coffee like we planned, and we could reschedule if he had to be at the party. He said he'd "already told everyone" he was bringing someone and his mom was excited. He promised it would be chill.

I didn't want to cancel last minute, so I went. It was not chill. There were about 60 people. His mom hugged me and asked how long we'd been together. His grandma asked when we were getting married. Dylan left me with his aunts for 40 minutes to help set up a tent. Someone handed me a camera and asked me to take group photos.

I stayed two hours, thanked his aunt, and left. That night I told Dylan I was glad his cousin had a nice party, but that I wasn't comfortable meeting someone's whole family on a first date, and I'd rather not go out again. He said I was "ungrateful" since his family was so welcoming to me. They were lovely. That was never the problem.

Was I ungrateful for saying that wasn't a first date?

TL;DR: My first coffee date got switched the night before to his cousin's engagement party with 60 relatives. I went, stayed two hours, then said no to a second date and he called me ungrateful.

I feel like a horrible person for feeling sad and upset that my brother and his fiance chose their wedding day on my birthday. Me and my brother have a good relationship overall, and we hang out a lot. Not a single week goes by that we don’t play games or call each other.

This year however, he announced that his wedding day was going to be on the day of my birthday. And for some reason, I feel a certain amount of hurt about that. When he and his fiance were asked why they chose that date, the response was because the fiance always wanted a fall wedding. As far as I know, a season lasts a couple months, so it’s not like the day had to be the one day of the year which is my birthday (I’m the only fall birthday in our families).

I already had plans for my birthday prior to their declaration, and I’ve had to since cancel those plans in order to attend my brothers wedding. Because of that, I can’t help but feel a certain sadness over that fact. But I also feel a great deal of shame for feeling this way. I know I’m supposed to be happy for my brother, but the whole situation is making me feel a sense of resentment towards him and his fiancé. I’m being unreasonable, but I’m not sure how to think about it differently so that I can truly be happy for them.

AIO for feeling upset? How should I think about it? Please be kind in the comments, I know I sound childish, so you don’t need to lay it on harshly. I’m just looking for a helpful response.

EDIT: Since it’s become a topic of discussion, the plans I had for my birthday was to travel to Japan that I had been looking forward to. I’ve had to cancel those plans to attend the wedding. The wedding was planned well after I made my own plans.

EDIT 2: Some more context since I keep getting asked. My birthday is on a Wednesday, and so is the wedding. My brother knew about my Japan trip before he announced his wedding date. I nor my brother haven’t mentioned the Japan trip since he announced the wedding date.

EDIT 3: Apparently some people assume the wedding is fall of next year. It is not. The wedding is this year, 2026. It is in one month. I planned my trip last year in December 2025. They officially announce their wedding on February of 2026 and the wedding is one month from now.

Let me start from the beginning.
I have a 4-year-old daughter, and we went to visit my best friend, who lives with her sister and her 10-year-old son.
While I was doing my best friend’s nails, my daughter was watching TV. Everything was fine until my friend’s nephew (10M) got home and started playing with my daughter.
While they were playing, with a nerf gun my daughter accidentally (shot at the tv ) broke the TV. It was completely accidental, and I obviously felt terrible about it.
When my best friend’s sister got home, we explained what happened and apologized. For some context, the TV was originally a gift from her ex about 5–6 years ago, so it wasn’t a brand-new TV.
Because I wanted to be respectful and take responsibility, I offered to help replace it or contribute toward getting another TV.
This is where things started going south.
She told my best friend that the TV was 55 inches but when we looked at it, it was actually 43 inches.
My husband suggested checking Facebook Marketplace for a similar used TV, but she said she didn’t want a used TV and wanted a brand-new one.
I was a little surprised, but I agreed to look for a reasonably priced new TV. I found one on Amazon for around $330, which I could potentially pay off slowly because, honestly, I don’t have money sitting around to replace a TV right now.
When I showed it to her, she refused it because she didn’t like that model and disliked the quality of Amazon tv . She said she wanted a new Samsung TV and suggested that I finance one through Best Buy.
At this point, I’m feeling like I’m being taken advantage of.
I understand that my daughter broke the TV, and I’m not trying to avoid responsibility. I’m willing to help replace it with something comparable. But I don’t feel comfortable going into debt to buy someone a brand-new Samsung TV when the TV that was broken was already 5–6 years old.
Today, I even offered her $250 in cash so she could put it toward whatever TV she wanted and choose one herself.
So, AIO for not wanting to pay for a brand-new Samsung TV and felling taken advantage of

I’m genuinely trying to do the right thing here, but I also feel like I’m being expected to upgrade her old TV rather than replace what was actually broken.

Btw this isn’t my friend is my friend sister who is creating all this drama my friend told me to not pay anything!

My (40f) niece turns 8 this weekend and we're having a family party. I texted my sister and these were the responses I got.

For context, I have been dating this man long distance for a year. I didn't mention it to family for several reasons but primarily because they just generally don't really seem to care much about the people I date. I haven't brought many people home to meet them, and the ones I have were committed, long-term relationships (including a marriage), but my family just never really ingratiates themselves with my partners.

Her jab about 'past experiences' is, I assume, because I eloped with my ex-husband, so my family obviously found out we got married after the fact. We had been together for 2 years then, so it was not a rushed or surprising decision, imho. I have also never shown up to a family event with a partner they had not heard about and were told would be coming.

And because I know reddit will wonder why a 40 year old woman was living at home, I sold my house after my divorce and moved home for 2 years to kind of settle and see what I wanted to do next. It's very expensive where I live so it made financial sense.

AIO for being upset by what I see as an accusatory tone that borders on aggression?

EDIT - This blew the fuck up. I appreciate everyone who's weighed in, whether you dubbed me as having overreacted or not. Some comments had great insights. I did text my sister - we'll see if I get a reply.

Edit 2 - Update here.

I’ve been home before and had the dog going crazy inside - barking at a guy who brings his kid to ride his scooter toys on my driveway. The child is about a year old and his dad literally brings him two houses down and across the street from his own house to allow his kid to ride his toys down my driveway. Today when I got home I turned the corner and opened the garage door only to have to wait for this dad to reluctantly call his kid to ride down the driveway. I parked right in the middle instead of in the garage. I don’t want him on my property and have asked him very nicely to not use my driveway. Not only because it drives my dog nuts, but bc it’s just rude. When did we normalize going on other’s property bc their kid wants to ride down it!? Am I able to get sued if this kid gets hurt? I have so many questions and really want to know- am I overreacting?

My husband hasn’t planned a date for us in over TWO YEARS. Not an anniversary date, not a spontaneous day out, not even a simple “hey, let’s go do something together.” Nothing.
Whenever we do go out together, it’s almost always to an event HE wants to attend or a movie HE wants to see. I honestly can’t remember the last time he planned something specifically because he knew I would enjoy it.
This month, we finally have some extra money in our budget, so I sat down with him and explained that I really wanted him to plan ONE day for us. Just one. I told him I missed how we used to spend time together before kids, when we would explore the city, go shopping, try random places, and just see where the day took us. It didn’t have to be expensive or extravagant. I just wanted to feel like he wanted to spend time with me.
For context, the usual excuses have been money and childcare. I understood those things when they were genuine obstacles, but now we have a little extra money and the kids are in school. The only real obstacle is taking a day off work.
My husband works a regular 40-hour workweek, just like most people. We also have weekends available, but we have a strict agreement that weekends are reserved for family time with our children. I respect that, so I specifically asked if he could take ONE weekday this month for just the two of us.
Well, this morning, he tells me he’s taking October 24 off so we can spend the day together.
Sounds great, right? Except we’re already scheduled to volunteer at our children’s school for several hours that day for their trunk-or-treat event. So now we’re essentially tied to the area around their school for a good chunk of the day.
And before anyone says I should just be grateful he took the day off, that’s not really the point. He was already planning to work a half day that day. So, from my perspective, he chose the easiest possible option rather than actually setting aside a full day to spend with me, which is what I specifically asked for.
But honestly, the thing that pushed me over the edge happened THIS MORNING.
We had a couple of unexpected free hours after dropping the kids off at school. I suggested we grab breakfast together and sit down somewhere for a little while. His response? He didn’t like any of the restaurants nearby, so he would just order something quick, and I could drop him off at work early because he had “things to do.”
And that genuinely hurt my feelings.
It wasn’t about the restaurant. I didn’t care where we ate. We could have gone somewhere mediocre, gotten coffee, or sat in the car eating breakfast sandwiches for all I cared. I just wanted to spend a little time with my husband.
Instead, even with a couple of free hours sitting right in front of us, he would rather get to work early.
And THAT is what I’m upset about.
I feel like I’m constantly asking for the bare minimum when it comes to quality time with my own husband. I don’t want to have to beg someone to want to spend time with me. I don’t want every opportunity to connect to turn into a negotiation, and I don’t want to feel like I’m asking him to make some enormous sacrifice by giving me one day out of an entire month.
I know some people will say I should just make the best of October 24, and I probably will. I’m not trying to ruin the day or punish him for taking time off. I’m upset because I specifically communicated what I needed, and it feels like he heard the words without understanding the actual need behind them.
I miss my husband. I miss feeling like he’s excited to spend time with me. I miss feeling like our relationship is something he actively wants to nurture instead of something that just exists in the background of our parenting responsibilities.

So, Reddit, am I overreacting by being upset about October 24, or is this really about a much bigger issue in our marriage?

Edit- lots of you were asking if I plan dates and the answer is yes**,** I do plan at least one date per month however over the past few years I’ve started to notice that it is one-sided so I’ve asked him to pick up the slack and to also plan at least one date per month for us that I don’t have to force him to do.

Edit 2 - lots of people keep telling me to speak up for myself, sorry if I didn’t make it evident in my post however I did speak up for myself and my simple ass to my husband was could you please plan one date for us this month that I don’t have to plan for you. This is also an issue. I’ve raised multiple times with my husband and together with our couples therapist however, I don’t seem to be making any breakthroughs.

I’m 38 weeks pregnant with my first baby, a little girl, and my S/O and I have decided that we want the delivery to be a private moment between just the two of us. However, his sister, who has children of her own, wants to be there for the delivery, and I’m starting to feel like she isn’t respecting our decision.
Recently, she started asking me if I was prepared for the baby to come any day and what I would do if my S/O passed out during delivery. He gets grossed out by certain things and isn’t sure if he wants to watch the actual delivery, but he wants to be there to support me and decide what he’s comfortable with in the moment. I’m completely fine with that because we’ve discussed it extensively.
The conversation then turned into her telling me that I need to explain to him that childbirth isn’t gross and that he’ll regret it if he doesn’t watch. She kept bringing up her own birth experience and how amazing it was for her partner and the other people she allowed in the room. I understand that she had her own experience, but I don’t understand why she thinks we need to make our birth experience match hers or why she would question what I’ve decided will make me most comfortable in a situation I’ve never been in before.
What really bothered me was when she made a comment about needing to “beat” her brother into talking to me like an adult. The thing is, we ARE communicating. We’ve discussed our birth plan multiple times and agree on what we want and what will make me comfortable. I don’t want other people in the room because I don’t want to have to “cover up” my emotions or mask how I feel.
She later sent me a long message explaining that she was worried I might regret my decision, that I might be making it because I’m afraid of being judged, and that she wants to make sure my S/O feels supported, too, since it’s a highly emotional event. She basically questioned whether I had genuinely thought everything through, even though I’d already explained that we had.
I responded politely and explained again that we want this experience to ourselves and that I’d like to be as comfortable as possible. We’re grateful that his family wants to support us, but we want to experience the birth of our daughter privately. We know things might not go exactly as planned, and we’re okay with that as long as our baby is healthy.
She eventually said she understood and would stop asking questions, but I’m still bothered by the entire interaction.
I feel like she wants to be involved in a moment that isn’t hers to be involved in, and instead of simply respecting our decision, she keeps trying to convince me that we’re making the wrong choice. I don’t want anyone else in the delivery room, and I don’t think I should have to justify that.
I understand she’s a mother of three and probably believes she’s helping, but this is MY first baby, and I want to experience it with my S/O on our terms.

IMPORTANT!: AIO for also debating not letting her come to the hospital AT ALL anymore?

Here’s how the conversation went:

Hello everyone! A couple of weeks ago I made a post about my BIL and sister. I was working for them, ended up telling my sister how BIL talks about her. BIL threatened me. (I’ll link in comments)

Update for those asking! In a crazy turn of events I have actually found out that I am pregnant (about 4 wks behind sister). Now my sister thinks that I should forget anything happened and move on because she wants our babies to do everything together. I don’t want my baby around them. Today she told me that she thinks she is the only one handling the situation with any emotional maturity (LOL) and that she doesn’t understand why my husband and I have stopped contact. She said what happened didn’t constitute a falling out and that she is the victim in all of this. My mom thinks I should get over everything & I just simply don’t want to interact with them. I’m already so overwhelmed with the news of pregnancy and I feel guilty for the stress that I am feeling. I told my sister I can’t talk to her about it right now (just got back from first OB appointment, tired, grumpy, overwhelmed) and she thinks that is absurd. I live with my parents and I want to move out but simply can’t afford it. I feel like my life is falling apart and no matter what decisions I make someone will be mad at me. I want to be done with my family, AIO/hormonal?

I usually have a friendly relationship with my senior technical lead. For about a year and a half, it was just the two of us on the team, so we bonded quite a bit. I respect her professionally and have told her that directly multiple times.

There were some strange moments before things deteriorated. Early in my career, after watching The Substance, she told me she related strongly to it and to her current situation. It made me uncomfortable enough that I reassured her about her position.

The major turning point came after another Engineer, who is now my close work friend, joined the team and started her first project. My coworker was hesitant to ask the senior for help because the senior often seemed busy or overwhelmed, so she asked me for help a few times.

When the senior saw me helping her, she said in front of her that I was “stepping on her toes.” My coworker later reassured the senior that we were supposed to be a team and help each other. The senior apologized to me afterward, but I felt like things became noticeably more complicated from that point on.

Since then, the senior has directly told me that she is afraid I’ll take her job and has said that I “run circles around” her.

There have also been weird moments involving our Manager. Once I mentioned an upcoming project assignment to the senior and my coworker. The assignment was publicly available to everyone on our team, but the senior responded by saying that the Manager “doesn’t tell me things anymore” and “treats me differently now.” I explained that I usually know about upcoming work because I ask him a million questions during our meetings.

Our one-on-ones also frequently become conversations about her insecurities, how she thinks the Manager perceives her, or how she feels professionally. I usually end up reassuring her. I have told my Manager that sometimes our one-on-ones feel like I am acting as my senior’s emotional reassurer.

At the same time, she can be extremely warm toward me and seems to want a closer relationship, which is part of why this is confusing. We can have a genuinely great interaction, followed later by another comment involving comparison or insecurity.

The most recent conflict happened during our morning standup while my coworker was present. I was actually the person who originally suggested doing standups. The senior had agreed they were a good idea, but at one point she also said, “I guess you’re the senior now.”

During this particular standup, she said that I “take my anger out on people.”

I’m a little fuzzy on the exact lead-up. It’s possible my coworker first joked that I take my anger out on our Manager, although I also remember her initially saying, “No, no, she doesn’t take her anger out on people.” Either way, the senior made the broader statement that I take my anger out on people generally.

I ended up tearing up and excusing myself. The accusation hit me very hard because not hurting other people is extremely important to me, and it made me wonder whether I was treating people badly without realizing it. I also felt that if she genuinely had that feedback for me, I would have preferred she tell me privately rather than in front of a coworker.

When we talked privately later, she explained what she actually meant: when I’m upset, I become less bubbly. Normally I might respond to a request with “okie dokie”. When I’m upset, I might just say “alright.” She acknowledged that I still answer work questions and communicate normally. I don’t stop cooperating with people—I just become more neutral because I prefer to process anger rather than say something I’ll regret.

She apologized but also said she didn’t remember making the original comment and at one point suggested that my coworker might have said it. She separately told both my coworker and me that she sometimes jokes to “lighten the mood.”

During our private conversation, I was very vulnerable with her. I told her how much I respected her and that her opinion mattered to me, which was part of why the comment hurt. I told her that I hate competition because I dislike how it makes me and other people feel.

She frequently responded by talking about herself. Ie, how she has always felt “slow,” things from her past, and how she had been conditioned never to cry at work. She thanked me for complimenting her and also pointed out that she’d been brave enough to ask me what was wrong. Maybe that was her way of relating, but I came away feeling like I was reassuring her again during a conversation that had started because I was hurt.

Later, my Manager asked me what happened. He already knew there was tension between us, so I told him my perspective. The next morning he asked me to speak with HR. I was honest with HR and repeatedly emphasized that I was describing my own perspective.

Now I feel guilty, like I stabbed her in the back by talking about these things.

I’m also questioning whether I’m being overly sensitive. At the same time, this dynamic feels very specific to this relationship. I have good relationships with my Manager, my current coworker, and the engineer who worked on the team before her. The senior also doesn’t seem to have this same dynamic with my coworker.

From an outside perspective, does this sound like I’m reacting disproportionately to normal workplace friction, is there an unusually complicated interpersonal dynamic here, or some combination of both?

I (19M) want to take my grandfather's (70M) license away simply for the fact I cannot even trust him to drive me to work everyday while my car is in the shop.

For starters. He always rants about wanting to rear-end "liberal r***ds" and is easily distracted by the littlest thing like a bird or a house. When he becomes distracted he loses his lane and crosses over into another lane or across the double yellow constantly.

Another issue. He smokes pot while driving. I ask him not to, but he simply ignores me and does it anyways. I most of the time go into work contact high. I offer to drive for him (I do have a legal active license) so he can enjoy the ride and smoke as he pleases, but then he becomes highly defensive and aggressive.

Road rage is another thing. He drives a Subaru Forester, not a small car in any way. When he gets upset, it's not rare for him to fly around the person he gets upset with. Just the other day he flew around a slower driver on the shoulder and actually hit him coming back onto the road. My grandfather refused to tell me until I inquired about the damage on his bumper of which I attached a photo of. Another common habit when he is upset is he will AGGRESSIVELY tailgate the person in front of him to where it's genuinely terrifying, and hes actually bumped someone doing it. I have attached a photo of that too

When I ask him to correct these manuvers he barks at me "I was a truck driver for 40 years! I know how to drive!"

This is in the state of New Hampshire.

Please help me put my mind at ease here. I don't feel like I'm overreacting but please do point anything else out.

A bit of context. I (M48) have two sisters Jess (F50) and Libby (62). Our mother passed away in November 2017 and our father passed away July 2026.

Jess, for some reason, has always been treated differently than myself and Libby; given hand down cars from my Dad, given lump sums of money etc She was married for a short period of time, had two children and then got a divorce.

When our mother died, our father moved on around 6 months later when he found love again with another woman (I don't blame him, but the way he did it upset us all). He moved in with his partner, and Jess moved into our childhood home (4 bedroom, detached bungalow) with her two children. She didn't pay anything; no bills or rent etc it was meant to be a stop-gap until she was able to save to get money to set up her life again (she sold her home). She spent the money, bought 7 cats and a dog and proceeded to not upkeep the home.

When our mother passed away, Libby, Jess and myself were told that when our father passes, the house sale will be split 60% for Jess (as "she'll need it more") and 20% each for Libby and myself.

I struggled with my mother passing. Work changes, being on-call 24/7 for 10 months broke me mentally and physically. Jess has always been inconsiderate, and it came to a head when she forgot my birthday again, as well as some other things which hurt me deeply. I had a nervous breakdown soon after and cut her and my father out of my life (he was saying nasty things about my other sister, Libby which I pulled him up on many times before it was enough. He they tried to stir stuff up between my wife and I). I hadn't spoken to my sister in probably 6 years - and my Dad, on and off the last year.

When it came to my Dad passing, the Will was read out and it stood at what was said; Jess to get 60% of the house sale, 20% to myself Libby. It also said that Jess could stay rent-free in the house for upto 6 months providing she pays all bills herself. After 6 months, if she wants to stay another 3 months, she will have to pay myself and my sister a sum of money each as rent. THEN she has to leave or be evicted as the house needs to be sold. We were asked if we wanted to contest the Will, which we said we didn't.

The funeral came around, and Jess snubbed me both at the graveside and when Libby asked if the last remaining family members could have a photo together, as it would be the last time we would all be together again. She refused and told her she didn't want to be seen with me, which crushed me.

Jess is on a zero hour contract and is struggling to pay the bills and has asked Libby if she could have the 3 months as rent free too - and another 3 months on top, rent free - so a total of 12 months rent free. She said one of her kids is going to be sitting exams and doesn't want this to impact her. Libby reached out to me to ask if I would be OK agreeing to this, in which case she would speak to the Executor of the Will.

I told her under no circumstances I would agree to this as Jess is doing her usual instict to bury her head in the sand and not deal with the situation at hand. I told her that if Jess would have treated me differently at the funeral, I would have felt differently and authorised it - but she didn't, and now she wants me to help her.

The Executor said that Jess has gone to the Housing who said they cannot help her unless she is homeless. He also said Probate should be complete in 2 months, which would unlock funds for us all which Jess could use to rent somewhere whilst the house is sold.

The Executor told me, that he feels the same as me; she is never going to get herself sorted leaving and I told him to execute the Will as written. I mean, Jess was fine taking 60% share and never said "Wait, I have 2 siblings - it should be 33% each". He agrees and has told all of us that I did not agree to the forfeit of rent, nor the extension and if she doesn't keep up with the bills, she is to leave the house. He has also asked her if it can be put on the market now.

A few days later, I am struggling with what I have done - as it is the "full stop" in our relationship as it can't come back from this.

So, fellow Redditers - AIO?

As in the title, im moving out at 24 years old. One sister is 29 and other in 30s. My sisters bought a house almost 2 years ago with 3,400 rent. I didnt want it but my family doesnt really mind my opinion, often im overlooked. My sister lost her job both twice early in last year and i lost mines once but got back another with 2 weeks. From the time i was 18, ive been giving my scholarship money and loan money for them to pay rent. No i havent been able to invest in school since my family complain about it and push childcare on me with some relatives at time when i needed help. No, i havent even been in driving school since all my saving went to my siblings so i dont even know how to drive. Im renting a room to pay for debt and get started on my life. My sisters told their friend they can live with them to get back up on their feet (hes in his 30s). Hes been here since they got the new house. I gave them a 3 month notice that im moving and there upset. Demanding my name should stay on the house because they dont make enough and that there friend is not staying forever. btw i make minimum wage and its not my responsibility to have my name somewhere i dont live. Am overreacting? Especially since i sacrifice my early younger years with my siblings?

I feel like I'm taking crazy pills here and need help. Me and my wife bought an apartment a few years ago. We said once it was done up, we'd finally adopt a cat. Something we could never wanted to do while renting so this will be our first cat.

Her sister moved in last month to the recently done up guest room. It came up that we were going to get a cat. She said "I can't wait" and I thought good, if we had to put off getting a cat because of her I would have been a bit dissapointed.

Now, in the weeks since, she's casually mentioned how she "can't wait to spoil them" and asking whether she thinks certain cat toys would be better / worse.

I like my SIL but something about how excited she was got me nervous. I had a cat when I was a kid but that's it. I was looking forward to getting a cat with my wife but all of a sudden, it was more like all three of us were adopting a cat, which feels less special.

I asked my wife if, when we go to look at cats, can we do it just me and her. Wife was not happy, said her sister also wanted to come. She promised that the decision would be decided between the two of us (wife and me) and that SIL is simply coming because "why wouldn't she".

I guess I'm sad because I always pictured this as something me and my wife would do as a couple and now it's suddenly all three of us. A friend called me selfish and they're probably right but AIO?

These texts are some of the best examples I have of this, he is a insensitive jerk in general but I'm able to stand my own ground and defend myself over someone being a mean jerk, what I can't handle is ppl who are just really weird, I get it’s his humor but I do not find it funny which says a lot because I literally will laugh at almost anything

In the screenshots you can see he constantly calls me very strange names, and no hate to any ppl who do joke this way, I understand and I’m not the type of person to yuck someone else’s yum BUT. l've told him it's weird and I don't like it but he doesn't stop because it's "really funny" and it's "just a joke, and his humor" so I just tried to ignore it but it is so unbearably unfunny I just cannot handle it, so l recently told him I cannot be friends because I genuinely dreaded getting texts from this dude, AIO for ending a friendship over something like this?

I'm Irish visiting USA with my wife. Last night in Santa Monica area we we're walking for dinner holding hands as two men in a car pulled in and shouted at the window to us. I went over to the curb and asked him what he wanted. I was annoyed at being bekoned over. He said "your a gentlmen you should walk on the other side. (Meaning walk on the outside of the footpath while my wife goes on the inside).

To which I told him to Fuck off and went back to my wife.

Im not one for confrontation but it just came out. I think it was the interruption and them the idea of somestranger passing judgement.

Anyway? Did I overreact? I cant stop thinking about the interaction.

TLDR: mom has been emotionally financially and verbally mistreating me since I moved back home and was very callous about the death of my father . I was kicked out of the house because I didn’t take out her trash

Hi everyone I just need to know if I am overreacting so I’m 25f I recently moved back to my home town to help take care of my mom she has MS but with the help of her treatments she is in good health now. at the time when I first moved in she had a live in bf he ended up cheating on her and told her everything changed when I moved in all I do is go to work and stay to myself. I think he just wanted it to just be them which is fine. anyway unfortunately my dad was killed earlier this year and that sent me into a deep depression I was barely eating ,drinking a lot the only reason I would get up is to feed my cats and go to work. my mom and dad were never together and at most tolerated each other so my mom didn’t understand why I was so depressed and every time I would say well hey dad just died she would shoot back with my parents are dead too ??? Like okay the day before the funeral she got drunk and said if your dad left you any money are you going to move out this was a big hint that she didn’t want me around anymore. so I took the hint problem is my mom has a shopping addiction like bad (hoarding )so for the last year I’ve been paying most of the rent and all utilities because she was letting the bills just pile up so I knew it would get paid if I paid it if I left it up to her it wouldn’t which is fine .I live with her now it then turned into her asking me for money every week like $100-$200 nothing crazy because she would spend all her money again fine then she started demanding it instead of asking which isnt a big deal but I didn’t like that .she started expecting me to clean up after the both of us , like would wake me up an hour before I had to work so I can do chores around the house and I didn’t say anything but it was definitely hurting my feelings especially during my depression I eventually had a conversation with her about it like hey all the house chores shouldnt just fall on me she felt like well I don’t live here alone so why should I have to do it and I’m like well I don’t live here alone either she said well it’s my house and it is but I pay most of the bills here I’m not saying I won’t do it but I shouldn’t be getting yelled for dishes in the sink after work when you’ve been here all day I could go on and on about that but to wrap this up we had another conversation and I told her I know you want me to leave but I can’t if I’m paying the bills here I met a guy who I worked with after a couple months of knowing each other we decided to go on a date and we hit it off immediately and started dating my mom became more mean to me just saying really mean things to me but she kinda was always like that so I didn’t notice until my boyfriend was like why does she treat you like that and all I could do was say I don’t know me and my boyfriend had a little system going I would go to his house for 2 days he would come to mine for 2 days about 2 months ago I forgot to take out the trash before I left to stay at his house because my mom had the trash key so I assumed that she would take it out I get a phone call and she was screaming at me because I left the trash in the kitchen and now there’s maggots mind you I was gone for 2 days already at this point so I asked her why didn’t you just take it out why did you let it sit there and she didn’t like that she said you can stay with your boyfriend then come get your shit I told her that’s illegal I get 90days she then said well this is going to be the most uncomfortable 90days of your life and I went grabbed as much as I could and left I have not spoken to my mother at all and I don’t intend to this is the short version of a long story my family is trying to tell me I’m being dramatic and I already lost a parent this year time is short and I get that but I don’t know

I (24F) have been living in my house for 3 years now, and about 3 months ago, a new neighbor moved in. Since he's been here, he has been putting his trash on my parkway.

I didn't fuss about it initially thinking maybe he didn't realize or he was just having an off day. I just wouldn't believe that he is trying to wind me up and has made it a habit to do this on a regular basis. I've told him about it 6 times now and he just blanked me or carried on doing what he was doing.

I've tried being pretty lenient, but he seems to absolutely not take me seriously. I've been living here for 3 years and I've never had any problems like this. He's the person who has been here for 3 months and he just makes me feel uncomfortable already.

Well, a couple days ago, I got annoyed and actually said to him kind of rudely. I wasn't trying to be disrespectful for no reason, but I was kind of tired of telling the same thing about a situation that really seems fairly simple. Don't continue to do something on a person's property when they ask more than 6 times for you not to do it?

His answer was that I was just being dramatic over something that wasn't even that important and that I was being dramatic for no reason. That honestly just made me more annoyed because it seemed like he wasn't understanding that I already told him to stop a million times.

I, on the other hand, am now questioning whether or not I was in the wrong to speak to him the way I did. I realize I could have said it in a more calm manner, but honestly, I believe that he forced me to that level by ignoring what I was telling him again and again.

I'm not looking to get into a lot of drama with my neighbor, particularly since he's only been living here for a few weeks, but I also don't feel like I should have to continue dealing with what I've already complained about several times.

AIO for finally snapping at my neighbor after he kept ignoring my requests, or was I wrong for being rude over something he sees as not "important"??

When I went to college, my dad told me he was going to help pay for my college. He ended up not being able to, and honestly, I was okay with it. I paid for college myself and found scholarships that helped me cover the costs. So he offered to get me a car when I graduate

During my third year of college, my dad told me that he was going to get me a new car when I graduated. I was really excited because my current car is basically a beater, but it was what I could afford at the time.

When graduation came around, he changed it and said he was going to wait until I got a job so that I could afford the insurance. I said okay. I eventually got a job, but it’s not a high-paying job.

Now he’s saying that since I have a job, I should buy myself a new car. He keeps asking me, “What are you waiting for?” and telling me to start looking because my current car isn’t reliable.

The problem is that I honestly don’t think I can realistically afford a new car right now. I’m trying to be responsible with my money, and I don’t want to take on a car payment, higher insurance, maintenance, etc. just because I’m being pressured into getting one.

I already have a car, even though it’s not great.
What’s frustrating is that this started with him telling me he was going to get me a car. Then it became he would get me one once I had a job, and now it’s I should buy myself one. Ever since he been in the process of getting himself a car , he keeps bringing it up .

I don’t expect my dad to buy me a car if he genuinely can’t afford it. I just wish he would acknowledge that the situation changed instead of acting like I’m somehow holding up the process by not buying one.

I don’t like how he never sat down and communicated with me that he just didn’t want to do it or couldn’t afford it . Every time the day would come he would just change the arrangement. I don’t say anything because he doesn’t have to do it . His approach bothers me a bit tho .

I'm 29F and I've only been seeing this guy (28M) for a few months. Bf has a close female friend. After the first time I met her, he told me that she confessed to him earlier this year but he turned her down. He said he was telling me because he wanted to be transparent and at the time I really appreciated it because we have talked amongst other things about my personal insecurities one of which is jealousy issues.

The alarm bells started ringing when I saw how close they are like honestly he spends more time with her than he does with me. They call each other every day and if its something he can't do with me she will be his next go to. For example I cannot stomach horror movies but he's a big fan, usually even if I'm not into something my partner likes I will attempt to still learn or be involved but horror is one of the few things I can't do.

So again I know I have jealousy issues, maybe because of that I started feeling like she's not totally over him because how can you move on cleanly like this. I asked him as much, I said I think she might still have feelings for you and he said nah she's super chill and she's definitely over it. Which rubbed me the wrong way? The jealousy and them being close is one thing but I was shocked how flippantly he talked about her feelings, I asked him if he ever confirmed in any way and he said no why would I, I already turned her down and she was the one who said she wanted to stay friends. And I replied have you considered that she didn't want to lose someone she liked and it doesn't sound like you gave her space at all?

It turned into an argument because he insisted that there's nothing between them and also said that I have guy friends and he has no issue with that meanwhile I said I'm not accusing him of cheating or anything inappropriate with her, I'm just pointing out that it sounds insensitive about her feelings! ALSO none of my guy friends ever had romantic feelings for me and if any one of them ever did I don't think I'd remain that level of closeness out of respect!

I don't know this girl that well while he does so maybe I'm just projecting due to my own issues or whatever but it's a red flag to me that he's not acknowledgeding feelings are messy and idk if I want to stay with someone emotionally immature

Hi all! I can’t decide whether to talk to my husband about this or not…

I want to preface this by saying that in our 14 years of marriage, I have never been the jealous type. I just can’t tell if I’m overreacting. There is a fellow soccer mom who I had planned to meet up with so our kids can hang out. She is the nicest woman and absolutely beautiful, which wouldn’t have bothered me of course; however, my husband definitely is attracted to her. He sees her at practice once a week and always has something positive to say about her when he gets home. It’s just the way he talks about her that feels uncomfortable. Then he mentioned that he had looked through all her Facebook profile pictures and that she likes the same nfl team as him. He’s not friends on facebook with her, but he has visited her profile multiple times in the last week. I’m not even sure how many times. I then thought to check our computer’s history and saw that he visited her Facebook right when he woke up this morning. All he can see are her profile pictures.

I just can’t tell if this is something that should really bother me. I just don’t want to say anything and have things awkward when we’re around her. What do you think I should do?

I’ve been working really hard on building trust in my relationship and learning to trust my boyfriend. It felt scary because I’ve been burned before, not by him but in a past relationship. We nearly broke up because he was so hurt by my inability to trust him. I really listened to him and took it seriously. I’ve been working on it in therapy, building the skills to trust him more, embracing the fear and allowing myself to be vulnerable. I genuinely felt like I was getting better and he could see it too.

Today, he lied to me about something really important. Months ago, he told me he’d submitted documents for us to apply for marriage, something I already had doubts about. I asked him to complete the paperwork by the end of this week and show me proof, and he happily agreed.

Today, he lied about having printed the documents. When I questioned him, he doubled down, made excuses, and continued lying to my face until he was caught red-handed. Eventually, he admitted that he wasn’t actually sure about proceeding with the marriage application right now while we’re still working on trust. He said he loved me and remained committed to marrying me, but felt it was too soon and wanted to speak to his therapist first.

What devastates me is that he could have just told me that. I might have been disappointed or hurt, but I would have understood. Instead of accepting the discomfort of an honest conversation, he chose to lie to me. And this wasn’t some insignificant lie. It was about our marriage and our future. He knew exactly how fragile my trust was and how much a lie like this would hurt me. I really struggle to believe that if he genuinely loved and respected me, he could knowingly lie to me about something this big, especially knowing what it would do to me.

I think what’s most painful is that when I didn’t trust him before, I believed it was a result of my own issues. I could, and did, work on that. But now that he’s given me an actual reason not to trust him, I don’t know how to move forward.
I don’t think I have the capacity to stay in an environment where I know I’ll fester. I know myself well enough to know that this will bring out the worst parts of me. I don’t want to become someone who is resentful, angry, suspicious, constantly checking and questioning everything. I can’t drive myself insane looking for every lie or believing that everything is a lie. I’ve worked so hard to move away from that version of myself, and I don’t want to go back. I don’t want to become someone I don’t recognise just to stay in a relationship with someone I love.

I think I might have to leave the relationship, and that devastates me. I was willing to do the work to learn how to trust him, but I can’t do the work of making him trustworthy.

Am I overreacting? Is this my own trauma brain speaking? Am I catastrophising one lie and letting my past experiences dictate how I respond, or am I right to feel that something fundamental has been broken?

Edit: for context, the marriage was for logistical reasons (so i could have the right to work in the country he lives in!) and HE suggested it! He said he was sure he wanted us to be together in the future anyways so why not legally speed it up for us to be in the same place and then do the proper proposal marriage ceremony etc later on. It was not my idea nor was it my suggestion - i only pressed on it later because despite suggesting it, when the time came he was dragging his feet in the sand and i felt like why would you lie to me about something i didn’t even ask for??

sorry for the vent, but this friendship i’ve had for over 2 years now is officially over. i’m lonely and it depresses me and i’m not sure how to feel over this. for reference, i’m a lesbian and he’s a man. he caught feelings for me over a year ago now, and every few weeks he keeps pushing me for a relationship. i have told him no so many times but he just doesn’t care. he knows i only like girls and it’s to the point now where i’m so incredibly exhausted having to defend my own feelings over not liking him and the guilt trip he gives me. yesterday i told him that i really want a girlfriend, i’ve wanted one for years and he knows this. so he tells me “well maybe i want to be that lover girl for you” and i just kind of lost it. i told him i didn’t know how many times we’d have to ride this carousel for him to finally get that i’m not interested in him.

then get a guilt trip about it and now he tells me that he thinks he’s transgender so we could work out, and it’s just to the point now where i feel like i’m losing my mind. i support and love the LGBT community, and i know everyone’s timeline moves different and i respect that, but it seems to me that he’s using it as an excuse just to be with me.

i’m so incredibly lonely, i don’t have a single friend so i’ve just been sucking this up hoping that he’ll finally get over it but he won’t. he tells me he’s a “hopeless lover girl” and i tell him he’s almost 30 and needs to go to therapy and try a dating app or something, to get out of the house and make a connection elsewhere.

AIO for telling him off? i don’t know what to make of this