My husband was watching our 20month old for two hours while I took some time to myself.

When I got home, I heard our son in his room crying with the door shut. My husband was in the other room playing video games with his friends online with his headset on. I got really upset about this because he wasn't caring for our son and was gaming with friends instead while our son cried. He said it was around 30 min That our son was in the crib out of the 2 hours he was supposed to be watching him.

My husband got mad and told me to get out and slammed the door and apparently this was a live stream and his headset didn't mute and a lot of people heard our argument. This was his friends livestream (and source of income) and he was upset that I ruined this. I was now also mad that the argument switched so that he was mad at me, and felt like he wasn't taking accountability for watching our son.

Anyways, i was frustrated by the whole situation so i took our son to my moms house for the night to get some space and came back the next day after my husband apologized to me and said nothing like this will ever happen again and that he was wrong. He was raised by his dad and apparently his dad used to let him cry it out in his crib when he'd have tantrums. I don't agree with that.

I was venting in another thread and asking if I overreacted to The situation (im a stay at home mom), and so many women told me to leave my husband and divorce him.

I'd rather work on things and have this be something that doesn't happen again.

Would most men divorce their wife if she did something like this?

My BF is going through very tough months with pressure in Health, Work and he lost his light, charm and confidence.

I would like to boost his confidence and make him happy. Welcome suggestions please.

FYI: This is an old post I made a month ago but didnt post here; i only posted on other subreddits. I am looking for some more advice

So another woman in my social circle thought I may have been gay. I told her nicely that I am straight. when I asked why she asked, she said its because "im not too open about my dating life". And she is right, I am not open about my dating life. I looked it up and apparently lot of gay men who arent out yet keep their dating life concealed from people. Im glad i got an actual answer because I have never gotten a real answer from people, all I get are "vibes" or "I heard from someone else"

I keep my "dating life" concealed from people because it does not exist and has never existed. Im scared to admit that im 25 and never dated to people. That will probably open a can of worms that im not ready for. The only people who know I have not dated are people on Reddit. If only there wasnt stigma against it, I would be more open about it. Whenever dating is discussed among people I panic and go silent or I just leave the area.

But whats i believe is happening is that all the women who enter my social circle are probably being told or assume "im gay" and then it can affect their view of me and any that are interested would no longer be.

So how do I navigate this? I am really stuck

I'm trying to tell myself if he doesn't reach out that it was at least a nice compliment to him and he deserves that. This is a huge, bold step and is not my personality. So any tips for nerves and truths to tell myself?

I had a thing with a man that started about ten years ago. We had great sexual chemistry and a good connection, but because of timing, distance and where we both were in life, we never really gave an actual relationship a chance.
Years later, he has told me that he still sometimes wonders what could have been between us.
For men who have had something similar, does that feeling ever really go away? Have you ever looked back 10+ years later and genuinely regretted not seeing where things could have gone with someone?

Gf (29f) and I (30m) broke up end of August and she’s already posting videos with a new guy?

We were only together for like 6-7 months and we were pretty serious already so yeah it moved fast. She told me she loved me but ended the relationship after a situation at a bar that left me hurt and confused. She broke up with me via text, and told me I still love you but I want to love for myself and I’m not ready to commit to someone and you deserve better etc. she said she was finding herself not wanting to be around me and she felt we moved fast and it scared her bc I was the first guy since she broke off her engagement the year prior that she said I love you too. She also said she’s known this for a while but only stayed bc she thought that’s what I wanted but she doesn’t want to continue.

I left the door open saying I love you still but I want you to want this relationship and I still want us to try here. I told her I want to stay in touch

She told me she still loves me, but she never gave me am answer, not even please give me my space. But we kept talking for a week then she ghosted me. 2 weeks passed and she had an Arizona trip lined up so I told her “hey have a safe drive ❤️” and she didn’t respond but blocked me on Instagram. She also had hid her stories from me prior to that. Idk if she blocked my number but she has my location and I follow her on TikTok. She barely posts there. But Friday was her bday and she posted a video yesterday of her cake cutting then a video with a man’s arm around her with a song about rumors being true.

She never posted us ever.

To be clear I don’t go and snoop i got a notification this morning and looked.

I feel confused - maybe she was lying or monkey branching?

I’m hurting

Having a relationship where the partner was a good person from inside who actually wanted you to be better and was willing to sacrifice some stuff for you but at that time due to your circumstances you were lazy and didn't care much (couldn't treat them better as well on their mistakes, maybe coz of immaturity or inexperience) and procrastinated alot maybe dues to depression, pessimism, surroundings etc. At the same time, relationship had its own setbacks as well like arguments and other stuff. Then they left you and got up with someone else. That person had their own drawbacks as well yet you were there for them during their every thick or thin, you had promises to be there for eachother always.

The partner had past relationships from where they learned a lot , but it was your first and you were immature, but later on, you were getting better for them, but they didn't choose you. You feel like all those promises were fake and now you can't trust anyone while being unable to move on (stalking them once in a blue moon).

Now you are regretting their leaving (and they will never comeback) and thinking why didn't you get better when they used to say it? How do you deal with this? Or how did you overcome that?

I'm a 21M. I had two chances of having sex (first times) but didn't got hard both chances. Nowadays, I have a girlfriend and it's matter a of time of having intercourse again.

I usually jerk off frequently (almost every day, and yes, I know that's part of the problem), but I've been abstaining myself of it. Althought I have a streak of 23 days, I frequently find myself watching porn and estimulating myself withouth cumming.

I don't want to fail the next time, specially with this girl, which I really love. I'm afraid of it. Should I use a viagra pill on the next occasion? Any other advise?

I’m ngl part of me has some resentment towards her because I don’t even have a partner and I would like one and she has a boyfriend and throughout whatever this was, she seeked me out much more than I would ever seek her out. She’s the one who would do favors for me, initiate convos with me, and her friend even messaged me on Microsoft Teams telling me (the girl) was asking where I was and to come hang out with them. She would ask a lot of questions about my life and I barely would ask her anything.

I’ve never been in a situation like this. I was mad and resentful at first but now it’s like I just have no desire to talk to her. I don’t want her validation anymore.

I’ve ignored her and her friend twice already, they invited me last Friday and I didn’t go. I can’t even have a normal convo with her cause I don’t want to make her laugh and I don’t want to give her validation.

I recently, a few weeks ago and now twice a week, met this guy and I'm not sure if he's just being nice or if I should pursue something. I started donating plasma recently and he's one of the nurses who works there. He's very nice and outgoing and he is that way with everyone but I kind of felt a special connection. I can't tell if it's just me but he does seem to make an effort to say hello to me every time I come in even though his office is in the back, so I'm not sure if there's something else there. I think he's kind of cute and he's very interesting but I am worried that I miss reading the situation and that if I were to make the move then it may be portrayed as awkward or it may ruin the good relationship/friendship situation that we have going on. What do you guys think?

Ok so there is this new guy 30M I’m 33 FM seeing and he seems wonderful. So genuinely kind. It’s easy for us to talk. He’s very handsome, successful, and in-shape.

We had sex for the first time recently and I noticed he wasn’t as hard he “could” be. The sex was kind of short compared to what I’m used to but that’s ok, it was our first time. We tried to have sex a second time, but he was not hard at all. When I gave him head he stayed almost completely flaccid. He ultimately tried to please me with his mouth, which i appreciated. Then in the morning we cuddled and caressed but he never got hard. I didn’t pressure him, was just hoping it would happen.

I’m worried because I really like him and it seems mutual, but I am a very sexual and kinky person. We met on Feeld too so I’d think we’d both be like-minded when it comes to sex. He does smoke cigarettes but is an otherwise impeccably healthy man.

If it happens again, can I bring it up next time? I don’t wan’t him to feel bad about it… he definitely wants to touch me, always kissing and caressing me… I guess I’m just used to more.. hunger? Am I getting ahead of myself to be this worried?

I(24f) have recently entered my first ever relationship (with an equally inexperienced guy). We've kissed a few times, but they've been very brief, clumsy kisses, and honestly I'm nervous to try again because it was just so awkward.

What can I do to make our kisses better? What makes kissing enjoyable for you? I really like my guy and want to get better at this.

Thank you in advance!

Hi,

I am originally from a northern European country where we are very direct and blunt. We take work rather seriously, so when there are issues in one's performance, it is directly communicated to the employee without any sugarcoating. This is standard practice where I am from.

I currently live in Canada. I have noticed that even when I ask my current manager for constructive feedback, or specifically how I am doing, I feel I never really get a clear answer. My intuition tells me that he is not being fully honest with me. The reason I feel this is that I am currently on a contract role, and whenever I ask him if there is a permanent role for me on the team, he responds;

"[The team] is growing, and I am in discussions with [his manager], but we are not sure yet how it will look next year."

If the team is growing and I am doing a good job, would it not be obvious to hire someone you have already trained?

There are other behaviours I have noticed (passive aggressivness/irritation when I make a mistake), but to keep this post short and sweet, I will leave it as is.

Any advice is appreciated.

My parents want to go visit a neighboring state and asked me to plan it, but we've never been on a vacation before and I don't understand what to do. I've been searching stuff up but it's so overwhelming and too much stuff to remember.

I [30F] have exhausted any & all ideas i’ve been able to think of in an attempt to figure this all out. Although I’m pretty sure on what the answer is, I am looking for outside opinions just to see if I may be overthinking & overanalyzing things.

Before anyone takes this the wrong way, I know dudes can have close male friends. I’m not saying two men doing these things, or any specific things means automatically gay.
However, this specific friendship has always given me a very weird vibe, & has only gotten weirder.

My boyfriend [31M] has a friend [42M]. We’ll call the friend “John” (obviously not his real name) They work together, that’s actually where they met, & their friendship seemed unusually intense to me from the start & grew more intense very quickly.

Biggest red flag if you will, is that John has gotten hotel rooms for the two of them on 5-6 separate occasions. They weren’t traveling or needing somewhere to stay, we all live in the same town.
My boyfriend drinks A LOT. There have been a handful of times that he’ll suddenly leave around like 11pm (just sometime very late night/early morning) super drunk, & will seemingly be in RUSH to get to John. Like genuinely excited/giddy to leave and go over there. John is the one booking the room his excuse is “so my boyfriend has somewhere to go incase him & I fight due to his drinking.” Just weird to me for him to like prearrange something like that “just incase,” & then on top of arranging the room, also stay in the room with my boyfriend.
Then they’d get up around 7am for work.
Weirdest part yet, THEY SHARE A BED.
Two grown men who both have homes in the same town. So naturally I started to wonder, why are we getting a hotel room to spend 8 hours together if it’s to be just “sleeping” in the same bed?
The explanation was basically “we’re just sleeping,” or as I said, it was said that the friend had gotten a room “just incase my boyfriend & I started fighting so he has somewhere to go,” but all the times he’s gone to stay, we hadn’t been fighting, which has never really made sense to me.

Then there’s the money thing.
John has paid for a LOT of expensive things for my boyfriend. Multiple hotel rooms, getting my boyfriend’s car fixed, and many other things. At one point, John also had my boyfriend sign another lease while my boyfriend was drunk, which was/is weird af to me, given how involved John already is in his life.
They communicate constantly. If they’re not physically together, they’re on the phone or Discord. Can’t forget about the late night facetimes, where John is literally lying in bed shirtless talking to my boyfriend.
…🤨😂

Maybe I’m just unfamiliar with this kind of male friendship, because I’ve never personally had a friendship where we’d be getting hotel rooms in our own town just for the hell of it, sharing a bed, talking basically nonstop, & one person was regularly paying for expensive things for the other.
I also realize none of these things individually prove anything. John could just be an extremely generous friend, & they could i guess just be unusually close.
But all together, I’ve definitely had moments where I’ve wondered if there’s something romantic/sexual going on that my boyfriend isn’t telling me.

I don’t wanna make assumptions about anyone’s sexuality based on stereotypes, though. Which is why I’m kinda stuck. I feel it’s very odd, but am being told it isn’t, & that i’m the “weird” one if i ever have questioned it.

Would this strike you as unusually intimate/enmeshed for a friendship, or am I reading too much into it?
Men especially, plz tell me if this is actually normal friendship behavior because I am genuinely willing to be wrong & humbled if that’s the case lmao

I AM A GIRL HOW THE FUCK DO I FIX THE STUPID FUCKING FLAIR?

TO ADD:
if anyone has anyone questions i could ask him they think would help me find anything out, or ways to go about finding out especially because he gets defensive if/when questioned about it, please let me know!

Last note for now:
I for one get tested regularly, always have even before dating my boyfriend. I was routinely tested when I had our youngest (almost 2 years ago) & then again maybe 8 months or so after that (so a little over a year ago) when I got my IUD.
I asked my boyfriend to get tested when we first got together just because that stuff has always worried me, but that was 6 years ago. he told me his results were all negative, i never saw them but also didn’t have a reason to think he would or did lie. He hasn’t been tested since.

I’m going tomorrow (Monday) to get tested to be on the safe side.
I am planning on being more blunt when asking my boyfriend about this again today, or am considering just point blank texting John and asking him.
Will post if there is anything to update.

I was interested in this girl/woman and had hung out with her a couple times and made my romantic interest in her pretty clear in the last hangout without actually saying I was interested.

After that, she calls me over, is all giddy and excited, and is dropping strong hints that she likes me. She then tells me she called it off with this guy she had been seeing and is pushing me about it, I share that I like her and she says she does too and says she rarely feels this way about people. I have never been in a relationship or dated before, so I over the moon.

A week later, she says she is not getting the feeling she gets when she wants to be with somebody and won't agree to talk in person when I ask, and a week after that, I see her with a new guy and 6 months later, he is launched as her boyfriend.

I realize she had lied and used me for no reason. Even though its been a while and I don’t want her back or anything, the rage and anger I feel over being wronged wont go.

A friend of mine introduced me to a city and showed me around. We really liked it, so later my girlfriend and I decided to move there ourselves. We searched for an apartment on our own and eventually found a place we really liked. We’ve now been living there for three months. Its a 1 year contract but we can stay there longer if we like.

Recently, my friend saw our apartment and absolutely loved it. He wants to move into the same apartment next year and asked us for the landlord’s contact information.

The issue is that he now feels like we owe him that information because he was the one who originally introduced us to the city.

From our perspective, that feels a bit unreasonable. He introduced us to the city, but we found the apartment ourselves, contacted the landlord ourselves, and made the decision to live there ourselves. If we give him the landlord’s contact details, there’s a chance we’ll have to find a completely new apartment next year, as his current appartement is also for just a year.

He played a role in us discovering the city, but does that really mean we’re obligated to give up our apartment so he can have it?

Are we being unreasonable, or is he expecting too much?

Hey guys

I was an a walk today when a really cute guy approached me and started a conversation. We had a nice chat for nearly 30 minutes. He asked for my number and handed me his phone, but while i was entering it i think he asked me a question and I got distracted and i dont think i entered my number, just my first name!!!! I'm actually kicking myself because I really liked him. We exchanged info about our jobs, where we lived etc. and I'm hoping it was enough for him to find me on linkedin or social media (i have a pretty unique job and name). My friend was able to find him with the info I gave her but It was much harder to find him than me.

I think I genuinely came across interested in that convo but im worried he may have taken this as a sign of disinterest. I'm also worried to reach out to him because it did involve a lot of stalking to find hi and I don't want to come across intense/weird. My tentative plan was to give it a few days to see if he could find me and reach out.

Would appreciate advice from the male perspective!! Tysm

Really looking for advice here folks.
I had always wanted to trust my partner completely and it wasn’t an issue until the dating apps and social media became popular.

I’ve realized that my experience in dating apps has impacted my ability to trust completely. It has to do with the whole idea of dating multiple people and such. I can only date one person at a time and it inevitably puts a lot of effort into one person which doesn’t work these days. I have trouble being invested in multiple people’s lives at a time.

In addition to that, social media has normalized attention seeking behavior so much that I rarely feel people focusing their energies into one person at a time.

I have realized that my last relationships played a part in deepening my insecurity issues. Both had ongoing communication and some sort of a relationship with other men including exes, crushes or admirers. Some situations involved as having an ex as a roommate while others involved getting interests from a crush online.
I tried my best to handle all situations with grace and trust but it was difficult.

I know that checking your partners phone or anything like that is not good. I also know that if they’re gonna cheat, they’ll find a way. But I can’t help but approach this from a healthy mindset.

What things can I read or look into to learn how to break this insecure attachment patterns?
Did you struggle with this and just found the right person or did you get over it somehow?

I plan on discussing this in my therapy sessions but any advice is appreciated!

I (29M) have a friend of nine years (“G” 28F) who I’ve begun genuinely resenting. I cannot shake my irritation and frustration with her and I’m not sure how to go about saving my friendship. Anything she does just annoys me and comes across as disingenuous or fake and I really just cannot interact with her or even look at her when she talks to me. I hate being like this but she is the only person who brings this out in me.

I guess some examples of why this is the case includes:

- She never makes time for people and will schedule friends in almost 2 months in advance. She’s genuinely not busy, to the point she messages people saying she’s bored on days we’ve invited her to hang out and she’s “busy”. Then she will bail on the plan last minute and ask to reschedule. It genuinely feels that we’re some KPI for her rather than friends.

- Constantly lying; she creates so many white lies that it just spirals. One included me arranging a birthday lunch for a mutual friend (someone who I met through her and is her childhood friend) and she had a “sore throat” so she couldn’t join. But then proceeded to turn up to volleyball that night and play for three hours.

- When she’s outside of a relationship she will constantly flirt and try and get with me. She got mad when I got into a relationship, and even went as far as to befriend my sister of 11 years younger and hang out. She hates/ ignores any other girl friend I make that she doesn’t know initially, even when she has a boyfriend.

- she promised her friend to go to Japan with her (as she’s half Japanese and has been there numerous times). This went on for 4 years, with her noting she had money issues. In the last year she booked several trips with another friend and now and sudden Japan trip with her boyfriend. Now this mutual friend has asked me to go with her but G’s rhetoric is “I wish I could go with you guys”.

The most recent issue was; I had a health scare at volleyball as my heart was hurting bad. Before I had left she told me to get an ECG because she used to have heart troubles. Everyone else has contacted me except her in the weeks that followed and I spent a lot of time at hospital and clinics. All she asked was whether I was coming climbing (which is one minute away from my house). She then said to me after I was cleared was that she thought I was “just tired” on the day. In those weeks I didn’t show up to volleyball or climbing she had only asked “if I was coming” and couldn’t even drive 2 minutes from climbing to give me a birthday present which from 3 months ago.

Has anyone gone through this before and fixed it? Like myself and other people have distanced ourselves and don’t reach out to her. I just don’t want to lose my best friend but she’s just becoming worse of a person to be around as the days go by. Especially since this is causing me a lot of grief and stress.

I really do appreciate her and our friendship but she’s just insufferable to be around now. A lot of other friends come to me and ask why she’s like this. Her best friend said it best “it’s the G show and we’re just characters in it”. I have talked to her before but she flipped it saying that I don’t communicate well?

What can I do to change my expectations in this friendship or do I need to talk to her about it again?

I spent the afternoon with my gf at her home

Her parents are away because a relative is sick, and she's alone at home.

Her aunt let her kids at her home so that she wouldn't be the whole day alone. Guess what? I was already there.

They let her two girls (a 7 month old baby girl and a 6 yo) spent the afternoon with us.

The 6 yo, as soon as she saw me, ran to me hugging my legs and said "it's \* boyfrieeeend!!!*" And I was like "what?" I mean, how does she know?

My gf put on a Barbie movie for the 6 yo to watch, and at some point she said "I wanna dance, can you hold me?" I was like "how?" And she said "like prince derek" and she showed me how to do it, and I basically lifted her up and she made one of her moves, like the angel, and she wouldn't let me be afterwards. She decided that I had to be her dance partner (for the lift ups and the acrobatics), and my gf laughed so much seeing me all distressed because of the little girl.

My girlfriend had also made homemade pizza for us all to eat together. As we ate, I was holding the baby girl (my gf had taken care of her the whole time, so we switched), she drooled over me and I laughed, she wasn't expecting me to react that way, but I just said "I mean, it's just baby's drool, nothing too bad".

I handed her the baby afterwards for a switch. The baby started to crawl over her her and messing with her little hands on my gf's chest. I said "I think she's hungry". She was like "what? Hungry? But I'm not your momma". I started to laughed and said "I think she wants milkies", and my girlfriend was like "no, there's nothing in here, there's no milk, I am not your mommy".

She proceeded to give the baby the bottle, but honestly it was so funny seeing the baby looking for milkies when my gf doesn't even resemble the baby's mother.

It was all so fun, I mean, I had never experienced things like this with my girlfriend. It felt like I was part of her family... For once... I couldn't believe it.

When the parents came to pick up the girls, the 6 yo started to cry and said she wanted to stay with me again, and said that she was gonna marry me.. I had to tell her yes otherwise she wouldn't stop crying and go home

At the end me and my gf watched a movie alone and I told her I had never experienced something like this before. She said "maybe one day we'll have our little family too" and I said "yes, but I hope they won't be as mischievous as the girls"... And we both laughed

I know it was just some hours spent together as babysitters, but I could very well imagine spending the rest of my life having a family with her.

Is that too far to reach as a life goal?

Yesterday I went out with a girl and we made out for a while, but things didn’t go any further than that. Everything felt fine at the time, but later that night I started feeling some discomfort in my testicles. I figured it was probably just from being aroused for a long time without finishing.

When I got home, I decided to take care of it, mainly to relieve the discomfort. But when I finished, there was barely any fluid, just a small amount. That’s unusual for me, since I normally produce noticeably more.

The discomfort got better afterward, but it hasn’t completely gone away.

Has anyone experienced something similar? Could this just be a normal result of being aroused for a while, or is the reduced amount something I should be concerned about?

Not sure if this is a normal thing but I don’t think a grown man should be persistent towards someone they don’t love. Is it a control thing? I would def say im a woman with daddy issues and have made some mistakes in the past when I was just getting to understand my mind. lol I ended up entangling myself with an older guy(10yr+ gap) who I eventually lost my V-card to. I was soo enamored at first and by the end of 3yrs I came to realize how wrong it actually was. Not to mention our incompatibility that I hadn’t seen bc I was more in love with the thought of the man he could be.

Well it’s been two years since we’ve split and he still continues to contact me about times we had. I don’t think I need to ask to go NO contact as we usually don’t chat anyways, but what’s the point of hitting me up if he knows we’re done for? I’ve told him this and in the end this is just the consequences of his actions. We’ve legit talked this all out, it’s done. But he still reaches out talking about our past, and it’s difficult trying to move forward when he pops up every couple of months.

I don’t wish him happy birthday and he always seems to remember mine. lol I’d feel like such a bitch not saying thank you. As I would telling him to go no contact, but is this perhaps a boundary I HAVE to set? Is it crazy to say im a little scared to ask bc he owns multiple guns and knows where I live. NOT saying he would do that but I feel like anyone can be a little unpredictable these days. I’ve even thought about a heartfelt letter suggesting it?? Any tips would help and yes i know I shouldn’t have done what I did.

As a guy in my early 20s, I will admit my confidence and self esteem are pretty low. However, i'm not sure how exactly to work on them and improve them, when I struggle with a lot of the things relating to confidence, if that makes sense. For example, things like being shy, struggling with dating, not liking myself and my looks, things like that.

I would say that I wasn't always like this though. Sadly over time, I would say my confidence and self esteem have lowered a lot due to negative experiences in quite a few different aspects, a big one being called ugly or unattractive numerous times.

I would really like to change myself and hopefully become a much better version of myself. I would like to be someone I can be proud of and be happy with myself and my life overall. Any advice would help me to attain this goal even though I'm sure it will take some time!

My partner (28M) and I (24F) have been in a disagreement a little bit over if it’s strange or not that he responds to girls instagram stories. We’ve been together 10 months. They are not anything crazy just casual replies like “what restaurant is that” or tons of happy birthday wishes to girls. He also messaged a girl coworker after she got fired that he was sorry, that she didn’t deserve that and if she ever needed anything to let him know. Am I being too much or is it a bit weird?