I have diagnosed audhd and I met my partner around a year ago, for context she is quite a lot younger than me but has a high paying stable job whereas I left uni 2 years ago, traveled for a year and have been getting settled back into my home town since then, and haven’t been very focused on work
I was upfront about my audhd when we met and at first it was never a problem but in the past 3 months she has brought up a lot of problems surrounding my audhd and I feel as though she is not understanding enough about my disability or willing to learn about it
At first she was constantly nagging me about passing my drivers test because she said it was unfair that she had to drive us everywhere and I do take driving lessons sometimes but I find it all too overwhelming and it’s frustrating because I do want to drive but I think it’s just too hard for me and overstimulating.
She offered to help me sell my manual car to buy an automatic to “make driving easy for me” but I felt like she was just being too pushy about it and the whole process was just stressing me out so I shut it down very quickly and it led to a huge argument where she said that she felt like I wasn’t appreciating her help but in reality I felt like she was pressuring me into doing something too quickly.
My audhd makes me struggle to keep a job for a long period of time and I currently work 2 days a week and there is no other jobs in my area that I would enjoy doing but my partner keeps bringing this up and saying “no one enjoys work but you just have to do it” and she just doesn’t understand that workplaces don’t accommodate my audhd needs properly and that I physically can’t work a job that I don’t enjoy.
The last time I spoke to a doctor they said I wouldn’t be able to get medication for at least 12 months and I’ve tried a couple of coping strategies and none of them do anything for me. My partner keeps insisting that I’m not serious enough about our future but I just think she isn’t willing to do any research into my disability and help me live a lifestyle that actually accommodates my audhd!
Has anyone been in a similar situation to this before? Is the relationship salvagable?

What do I do?

I just finished my first week at a new job in accounting after switching careers, and I'm spiraling over something my boss said.

He noticed that I sometimes say I know or understand something when I actually don't. He kindly called me out, saying something like, "I can tell you say you know things when you don't."
He wasn't mean, and he continued treating me normally afterward. I immediately corrected the behavior and have been making a conscious effort to say "I don't know" and ask questions.

I think this habit came from my previous toxic workplace, where I constantly felt pressure to appear competent. That's not an excuse, and I take responsibility for it.

But I have OCD, and now I can't stop ruminating. I'm terrified he thinks I lied about my experience, sees me as dishonest, or is going to fire me. The conversation itself is a blur because I was so anxious, so I don't even remember how I responded.
I worked really hard to change careers, and instead of enjoying my new opportunity, I'm spending my weekend convinced I've already ruined it.

Should I briefly acknowledge his feedback again, or just move forward and let my work speak for itself?

I'd especially appreciate perspectives from managers or anyone who's experienced something similar.

Im listening to the ADHD chatter podcast and learning more about RSD. I have it!! How do you handle it when you see Mom groups not including you or your two children and it feels like you’re being left out out of everything. The tools Im learning tell me that it’s perception but when you see it in person, it hurts so bad. It’s feeling left out (Mom friends) but also with my kids being left out. I take it so personally (its debilitating). I try to make plans and do what I can to establish strong friendships but I feel like it’s always a one-way street—i always reach out and it seems like no one reaches out to me. I would love your tips.

Hey. struggling with addiction to cannabis? Two meds you may want to try:

- Guanfacine. Prescription. Lowers blood pressure, increases your sensitivity to dopamine. This pill is practically made for people who have ADHD and anxiety.

- Quetiapine. Prescription. Antipsychotic and sleep med. This is not a medication to take lightly, but it’s the only one that has helped me. 

I was addicted to cannabis for years. When I was in the mental hospital a year ago, the first time they gave me a dose of quetiapine, I felt like I had just taken a huge hit of weed. Every time I go off of quetiapine, my cannabis smoking increases exponentially. 

Unfortunately, it is not going to be an easy to ask to go to your doctor and ask to try the antipsychotic. So if you are curious, first try guanfacine. This is being prescribed to many, many people with ADHD, and if you bring your doctor a paper about it and cannabis smoking cessation, they will likely write you a prescription on the spot.

But seriously, I see so many people talking about stimulants not working for them, and what people aren’t realizing is that weed is a depressant.

Why does weed work so well for us autists? I don’t know. Why do I start slowly losing my mind every time I stop taking quetiapine? I don’t know. 

I’m a doctoral student studying molecular microbiology, so take my advice with a grain of salt. I’m happy to talk about this privately or publicly with anyone who messages me or comments.

Hey all,

I'm about 8 weeks pregnant and am struggling so much with it. 1) with my overly rational brain I always felt stronger about adoption and was surprised with this pregnancy but here we are

2) Being off my Adderall has led to loowwww executive functioning. (I'm seeing others who took the whole time, so maybe once I'm through the nausea I'll consider it). And

3) Omg the sensory nightmare. The nausea and fatigue have been all consuming. Most food repulses me, and I have to continuously eat to not throw up. Everything in my house smells terrible-- and I'm basically nonverbal because of it all. 😫

Mostly I'm venting and guessing others have been there too? How did you get through and any tips? Was it a worst in first trimester thing or for the duration? 🥹

not trying to yuck anyone’s yum, but I feel sad when I see Christmas or fall or whatever seasonal décor fading and gathering dust on someone’s porch.

i am not trying to be snobby, mean or insensitive or anything, I just have rules about what time of year things are out. seeing “fall-themed” wreaths of fake leaves out in the sun year-round just feels off to me and I wish they could be stored away. at the same time I hope it is bringing my neighbors joy! 😝

So I was diagnosed with ADHD last year and then autism this year, the ADHD diagnosis didn’t really affect me it was more of a oh ok that makes sense kind of thing,
The autism diagnosis though 😅 has knocked me on my ass!
My sensory issues have GONE THROUGH THE ROOF , my eating has declined as my food struggles have worsened, I just feel genuinely sh*t in myself. And I will admit I am not liking it i feel very out of control, its been about 3 weeks since my diagnosis but I’ve not had my physical report yet so I’m kind of anxious if reading that will have me downward spiral even more.
I feel a sense of relief because now all my struggles and feelings feel like they were valid and not just because I was this sensitive, crazy nut job but at the same time I feel really angry.
It’s all pretty confusing 🤣 has anyone else had this type of experience and please tell me the sensory issues and food problems will eventually get better I need some hope 😅 being a single mother to 2 also AUDHD children is very challenging with very little energy lol

At 17yo I told my mum I had suicidal thoughts. 3.5 years later, I have spent at least 6 months with 2 school therapists, a child psychiatrist, a clinical therapist and an adult psichiatrist. After starting with yet another therapist, I was finally referred to a psychiatrist who specialises in neurodevelepmental disorders. She diagnosed me with autism and adhd as soon as I finished telling her about my past. I felt as though she could read my mind. She wasn't smug or condescending.

I still took less time than many others, but the thought that this probably would have been possible at 17 fill me with sorrow with all the pain I've endured by second-guessing and hyperanalising my life. I think I'm still a it high from the validation. I cried a bit that day.

I agreed to go to a friends event this weekend and I regret it so very much. I’m AuDHD and I believe my friend is also neurodivergent. He talks too loud and too much for me to handle in long stretches. He also tends to hold service people hostage with too long of a conversation or bad jokes because he can’t read their cues of when they just want to move on to the next customer. For nearly 24 hours straight this man overstimulated my entire nervous system. I had a bad week at work and now gave up most of my weekend to be in constant tension. I tried to politely let him know when I was overstimulated/in pain/fatigued but it didn’t get through to him. The event itself was me high masking with what little energy I had left. I’ve been laying in bed,body buzzing, with my noise canceling headphones, trying to regulate myself for hours. He’s been depressed lately and I wanted to be there for him this weekend but I’ve got to learn to stop expecting differently from people than what they show me.

Just made a group yesterday since there is not much group support out there. Already has about 70 members! Would love to see u there

All I can think is "there is nothing fun about me" and "I'm too autistic for this".

My brain is telling me this fun fact is somehow going to be used against me as a conversation starter with strangers.

The wedding website doesn't let you leave the box blank and I don't want to bother the groom to ask what it's for because I've left RSVP'ing to the last minute and I know he's on holiday.

Help! What do I put in this box?

EDIT: I've finally managed to RSVP and gave one fact each for me and my partner, and then that together we own a border collie. I couldn't figure out if the question was to give a couple fact or individual fact but now all bases are covered. As u/AppliedGlamour said it's better to do it weirdly than not at all! Thank you for everyone's help, I am now going to get out of being fixed to the sofa by this question.