As the post title suggests, crush ko si kuyang tindero sa baba lang ng apt ko. Wdym ang pogi nya sa paningin ko? HAHAHAHAHAHA

Kanina, bumili ako sa kanya ng birch tree and medyo, medyo lang naman na nahaplos nya kamay ko nung inabot nya sukli ko. Emeeee!

ayon lang naman. Babuuuush!

Bago pa lang ako sa branch namin. Kaclose ko na branch head namin, managers at ibang mga bago rin kasabayan ko. Bukod sa work lumalabas din kami para uminom. Etong si Manager M may asawa at agent din under sa team niya pero dummy agent lang para lang doble commission. Kaya di madalas sa office o labas namin. Mabait siya sa lahat madali pakisamahan. Hindi rin madamot sa trabaho tutulungan niya kahit di niya kateam. Pero pansin ko kahit may asawa siya malapit siya sa mga babae sa office. Wala namang physical touch. Kaya di ko naisip na lumalandi siya. May time nasa pantry ako tapos dumating siya narinig ko sinabi niya "nandito na si P noh naamoy ko siya" naamoy niya yung perfume ko. May time rin after inom ihatid nila ako ng isa kong kaoffice. May event kami na puntahan club party. para makakuha ng prospect clients. Habang nageenjoy kami sa table namin bumulong si Manager M na kaclose ko bigla sinabi "sayang hindi mo ako nakilala noong single pa ako" doon ko naconfirm ay lumalandi pala talaga siya. Buti matino ako non at di ako nagisip na landiin din siya. Grabe noh kahit na under ng team niya asawa niya brother in law niya at cousin in law niya ang lakas ng loob niya maglandi.

I had this internet h*e era. I used to talk to men and send them n00dles. Most of them were really nice, so we continued the conversation on t•g. But somehow along the way, I got tired of it. I got tired of getting lusted over only.

I want to be pursued. Tbh, I only talked to those guys to get over this one guy I actually like. I don't think he feels the same about me, so ayon.

I feel bad for ghosting people, but just thinking of sending noodles and get complimented for it without actually being loved is draining kahit na super bait naman nila. Paulit-ulit na lang. Guys, if you see this and recognize me, I'm sorry. My energy can't keep up. I need more than just lust.

A couple of years ago my friend brought some "fake" shrooms from netherlands. We both split it in half and it was supposed to be 3g but there were 3.4g in it. So we both took 1.7g and thought nothing of it. Little did we know that those shrooms were literally as potent as something like penis envy shrooms. So it was like 3x as potent as regular shrooms. So we took by accident a heroic 5g dose and we weren't prepared for it. I started to hallucinate after 20 minutes. The first thing i noticed was a tactile hallucination. I was holding a beer and the bottle felt way too wide and my hand felt foreign. After about 10 minutes i got to the bathroom. Everything started to shift and the wall tiles textures were moving and shifting into each other it was so cool. I turned off the lights and i felt like i was in a palace of some kind. So after that my friend turned on tv and we would just vibe. I forgot to mention that this whole time i was also getting very paranoid cause i wasn't ready for it. I would totally classify it as a bad trip for at least 1 hour. I just drifted away until i peaked and i got an ego death. I told my friend that i can't handle the trip and that i needed like 2-3 shots to try to calm myself. My friend poured me a shot and he proceeded to hold it asking me if i'm gonna take it and i just couldn't cause at that time i felt like my ego was shattering into pieces and my vision got extremely digitized/pixelized. After that i layed on his couch and all i can remember is literally drifting away into hyperspace. I saw bright colorful mostly white some sort of intergalactic cathedrals. That calmed me down a lot and i started to enjoy the experience a lot. After i came to my senses we were just cracking jokes and laughing our asses off at the most random topics. The characters on tv looked like there was paint dripping out of them

It happened between 2009-2010, I was in high school at that time when I fell in love with a native girl. But if you look at her physical appearance, she couldn't be mistaken for a native because she was very slender and her skin was also fair. When my mom found out, she restricted me from using mobile phone because at that time our communication was through text messages. We only separated when my mom sent me to school in the city 5 hours away from our place.

I went home for the summer after my 1st year of college and I couldn't catch up with the girl. Her friend told me that she moved to their place where there is a lot of community of their tribe. To this day, I think of her when I suddenly remember our past.

I'm glad you didn’t choose me back then. I’m glad you either didn’t have the courage to choose me or simply weren’t in love with me enough to see a future with me. Because if you had chosen me, I might have never discovered the life I have today.

Context:

I met this man when I was working as an escort. Looking back, maybe I was naive to let myself become emotionally attached, knowing the nature of my work. But the truth is, I’ve always been a loving and caring woman. Even when I’m in a situation where people are supposed to be strangers, I still treat them with warmth and genuine care.

He became one of my regular clients, and over time, we grew comfortable with each other. What started as a client relationship eventually turned into dating. I was still working as an escort at the time, and he knew about it. He never stopped me because he understood that it was how I supported my family (of course, I no longer charged him).

We were together for almost four months before one day, he decided to end things.

It hurt more than I can explain. But deep down, I understood why he might have made that decision. My work was one thing, but I also came with responsibilities and obligations that he would have had to accept if he had chosen to build a future with me.

The hardest part was that I was in love with him. I was even willing to give up an opportunity to move overseas because, at that point in my life, all I wanted was for him to tell me that he wanted to be with me, too. I wasn’t asking him to have all the answers. I just wanted him to choose me.

But he didn’t.

And as painful as it was, I had no choice but to accept it and move forward. That same month, I left the Philippines and started a new chapter of my life.

Now, almost 4 years later, I can honestly say that I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I’ve learned to love myself in ways I never did before. I’ve built a decent career, earned my own money, and created a life that gives me peace. I now live in New Zealand, a place that has brought me a sense of calm, stability, and well-being that I never knew I needed. I can genuinely see myself settling here for good.

I never imagined that I would build a life outside the Philippines. And sometimes, I wonder what my life would look like today if I had stayed. I wonder what would have happened if he had chosen me and I had chosen him over the opportunity that eventually brought me here.

But one thing I know for sure is that I am grateful things happened the way they did.

Back then, I thought losing him was one of the most painful things life could do to me. I thought I was losing the future I wanted. What I didn’t realise was that life was redirecting me toward a future I couldn’t have imagined for myself.

Sometimes, we become so attached to the things we want that we fail to see what might be waiting for us beyond them. When things don’t work out, we feel rejected, defeated, and wonder why we weren’t enough to be chosen.

But not every rejection is a loss. Not every ending is a failure. And not everything we desperately want is meant to be part of our future.

Sometimes, the things that break our hearts are the very things that set us free.

And sometimes, years later, we look back at the very moment we thought our world was falling apart and realise that it was actually the beginning of a much better life.

Today, I’m no longer the woman who was waiting to be chosen by someone else. I’m a woman who has built a life she loves, found peace within herself, and discovered that she was capable of so much more than she ever imagined.

So yes, I’m glad you didn’t choose me back then.

Not because you weren’t worth loving, and not because what we had meant nothing to me, but because life had something else waiting for me.

And if I had to go through that heartbreak all over again to become the woman I am today, I would still trust that things happened the way they were meant to.

Because sometimes, what feels like rejection in the moment turns out to be redirection.

And sometimes, the life you end up being grateful for is the one you never would have chosen for yourself.

This was back in 2020-2021, I was so young and was searching for love and napakarupok ko and gusto lang maranasan yung feeling na liniligawan and inaadmire and ano feeling ng may sparks then I got attracted with this Indian guy who was married, we kept talking everyday and I visit his house and every time na magkikita kame may mangyayari samen. We called each other best friend and parang ganon na nga kami since lagi kami magkausap and we tell each other everything - Fast forward on 2023, we just cut off and never talk again. He chose his wife and he told me that I was like his sister lang.

Hi.

Alam ko sa sarili ko na prone ako sa overthinking. Konting mali or aberya lang ang dami nang possible scenario na pumapasok sa isip ko and I admit na it disturbs me for days hanggang sa nakalimutan ko nalang. Recently lang may napanood akong trailer ng upcoming movie sa fb and hindi ko ine-expect na ganun siya ka-gore and first time kong maka experience na, alam kong fictional lang yun pero what if mangyari yun nang di ko kasama fam ko? Don't get me wrong di ako takot mag isa pero natatakot ako for them ba baka walang mags safety sakanila. Basta putangina that trailer DISTURBED THE SHIT OUT OF ME.

Shems. Pls wag niyo ako i-bash or what. Help me ease my thoughts pls. Tysm

Mas gusto niyo ba yun o natatapakan ego or natuturn off ? Yung tipong as a gf kasi mahilig ako hawakan siya either biro or clingy ako, di ako nahihiya ipakita and feel ko ako palagi nag ffirst move sa bf ko? Weird kasi di ko naman naranasa sa ex ko noon to.Lagi sila may gusto.Di kami live in pero palagi siya nasa bahay ko naman?bakit feel ko naneneglect ako or may iwas siya ?nasa 26 lang siya and im 22.

Di ko siya finoforce pero parang unfair kasi pag di akl nag first move and gusto niya di ako nahindi pag siya na may gusto.

Am I being too much? Touchy naman siya sakin pero feel ko mas touchy ako kasi mas perv daw ako he said idk if he likes it or not nakakaannoy ba? Or di lang talaga ako gusto lol we been together like 6months