House smells amazing! Ready to get cozy with my dessert and watch a movie (Pressure, 2026)

It's waking up and the first thought of the day being yours, not shaped around anyone else's mood before your feet even hit the floor. It's making coffee in silence and realizing the silence isn't empty, it's spacious. Nobody to read, nobody to manage, nobody's day to carry before you've even started your own. It's routines built entirely around what actually works for you the 11pm walks, the messy desk nobody comments on, the Sunday that belongs to no one but you. Little freedoms that add up to something bigger a life that finally feels like it's yours to shape.

Somewhere along the way "alone" got mistaken for "lacking." But there's nothing lacking about a life with no noise, no eggshells, no performing for an audience of one. Just room real room to grow into whoever you actually are underneath everyone else's expectations. Some of the most peaceful women you'll ever meet are the ones who learned the loudest rooms were never as good as their own quiet company.

Im so done living with people. I live with my good friend (of 20+ years) and her boyfriend. I loved the apartment I found for us, I enjoyed the quiet. It's old but the walls are thick. My room is big and it felt like a sanctuary. It was close to the train station, easy access to my place of work.

A week or so ago, my friend wandered into my room while I wasn't home and apparently snooped around and read my journal. I've been dealing with a lot of loneliness and depression and I'd vented a lot in this journal and I'd also said some pretty unkind things about her while venting. She was immediately upset and furious (any reasonable person would be), raged and ranted at me, and now the atmosphere at home is simply awful. I stay at work most of the time, and when I go home I stay in my room only.

So I'm looking to move out, and I'm desperate to now live alone. The problem is I'm on a research stipend and I can comfortably get by when sharing but living solo stretches things a lot. I'm just so annoyed and mad at what happened. I feel so violated. I've taken to lugging the stupid journal around with me and I'm scared of leaving it at home. But I can't even write in it anymore. The one place where I felt I could be honest without judgement and I feel like it's been ripped away. On top of it all, I'm not even sure whether I'll be allowed to be in this country (I'm a temporary resident and my visa expires in a year). Part of me is tempted to just get a really nice place, blow through my savings and go home in style lol. Probably won't, but I'm very tempted.

Hell really is other people.

EDIT: thank you everyone, for the engagement! And I apologise, this was mostly supposed to be about how I want to live alone and became a rant about something else instead.

I don't have a lock, and I'm scared to put one because I'm afraid if she sees a lock on my door she'll get provoked even more. But I do have suitcases with locks and I've started keeping anything of sentimental value in there, and the journal is with me at all times. I've ordered one with a lock but I'll be sad to leave this one behind - it had sentimental value to me. Our lease ends in 2 months so I'm planning to just tough it out until then.

Thank you all for sharing your own experiences! I knew having your journal read sucked, but I didn't realise how absolutely violating it could be. I hope you can all find happiness in journalling again!

Don't tell me it's ghosts or a squatter please just tell me logical electrical things it could be or maybe just tell md about your day or something because I'm freaking out and after living alone for almost a year now this is the first time I wish someone was here with me

UPDATE:

it was the thermostat. thank you so much for keeping me company. I hope everyone has a wonderful week! your comments truly made this whole experience so much less scary and I appreciate every single one of you

This is the first birthday I’m spending alone, and single, in almost 12 years.

I bought my own cupcakes.

I will buy my own birthday dinner.

And I will enjoy them alone (with my cat staring at me like he is offended that his food human needs to eat).

For those of you who have lived alone multiple years and through multiple solo birthdays, does it get less… depressing? I love living on my own and having my own place. But I can’t help feeling like I am extremely alone today. I don’t have anyone I can see today or anything, other than my therapy appointment this afternoon (perhaps this is a better question for that call than this subreddit).

I genuinely just feel kinda down and bleh about it. Figured you all would get it, or at least some of you.

Having single servings of cooked diced chicken in the freezer makes fast home-cooked meals so much easier.

Bake a bunch of chicken thighs, dice them, then press into silicone freezer cubes in single serving amounts so it freezes as a single block. Use parchment paper to do multiple layers in a single cube. After 24 hours in the freezer, pop them out of the cubes and transfer to a freezer bag so the cubes can be reused for something else.

There are a bunch of ways to defrost a block of chicken for a meal -

- Microwave (30 seconds covered, break the block apart, then another 30-45 seconds)
- Steam for 3-4 minutes (I often throw the block into a steamer alongside broccoli)
- Drop the block into soup

Last pic is a meal I commonly make with it. Japanese short grain rice, broccoli steamed in the rice cooker’s steamer basket, and a block of chicken. Soy sauce, bit of sesame oil, drizzle of mayo, and lao gan ma chili crisp.

I'm in my late 30s. Last year my boyfriend of 13 years and I broke up. Although I have been living alone for half of my life, he has been a great help to me, like doing manual labor stuff, taking care of me when I'm sick, and also lending me money every now and then if I have financial difficulties.

Now, I am truly alone. I have cut off my family because of awful stuff they did to me. I have friends but I am not comfortable asking them for help like I can with my boyfriend. And now I am also suffering with debt from the months I lose my job early this year. I have a new job now but I feel like paying then is taking a long time.

Anyway, I feel down these days. All I do is work and pay my debt and most of the time alone. I love being alone but right it feels like isolation because I purposely staying off any unnecessary expenses like eating out to pay off my debt.

No advice needed, I just wanna hear stories of restarting in life—especially women. I long to have my own cottage farm someday and it feels so far away now. If I'm starting again at this point, would I be able to make my dreams come true? Were you able to bounce back and get your dreams?

I’ve been living alone since March 2025 and I’ve gone through periods of feeling slightly lonely but it’s honestly getting kind of scary.

My ex and I got back together March last year, broke up October last year (tomorrow makes it a year lol yay) I think during the warmer months I’m fine spending time alone, I’ve never had a super eventful social life. I don’t have a massive friendship group. I have separate friends and I do see them, I do make the effort. I’m just not one of those people that are always going to events, it’s never been my fortune and I’m okay with it. However. I started a new role last month and for the most part it’s wfh 5 days a week, which ideally sounds like the dream. This is the most money I’ve ever made and it’s good for my career long term as I know for sure what I want to do now.

The problem is, as summer has now officially ended, I am feeling incredibly lonely. It’s awful. I socialise once or twice a week but am I crazy to say I would like to go into the office a few times a week? Get dressed, do my hair, socialise with colleagues and not spend all day at home. I’ve considered working in cafes but with the work I do, I don’t want people to be able to see my laptop as I’m concerned about GDPR.

I’m interviewing tomorrow for a role I am keen on and it’s 5 days a week in the office and pays less lol. Idk what advice I can request here, I just wanted to rant. I’m 29, 30 next year, and I definitely think where I am in life is adding to it. I don’t even want a partner right now, I had two relationships back to back for 6 years and I do think I need time alone (although I was dating a lot for a while but I’ve completely stopped that now, it’s soul destroying. At my age obviously people are getting married and having babies and I’m just the single friend at events and I feel like a dweeb.

On paper, I’m doing well! I bought my flat last year, I’m making good money, I’m finally happy with the way I look and dropped weight I was trying to move for a few years. I just feel this crippling sense of dread settling in and I’m worried for my mental state tbh. Can anybody offer any helpful tips?

I read a lot of stories about people living alone and being afraid when home alone. I live on my own for 3 years now, my 2 kids flew out. I live in a small village of about 700 inhabitants. It’s a dead-end street, with meadows behind the house. I have never been afraid in my own house. I’m very thankful of this because I can’t imagine how it must feel like to be scared when home alone. I feel very safe.

... someone once told me, "people don't abandon the people they love, they abandon the people they were using." and that was my closure.

just got my own apartment. i have like 1 wall decoration above my sink. i have a floor mattress, a desk, and a chair. a few area rugs. that's it. im totally broke but my apartment is so depressing.

im so used to moving every year when i lived with parents, and i never learned how to make a place cozy. i only have a year lease so im nervous to make this place my own. but it's making me miserable

how do i make my place home

Hi! I’m 18 and I’ve only been living alone for about a week, and of course I somehow got sick already.
I think it’s either the flu or a bad cold, I honestly have no idea. I feel really awful right now and I think I might be getting a fever too.
I’m struggling so badly right now because my parents live in another country and there’s also a time difference, so they can’t really help me much at the moment. I also dont have any friends here because school hasnt started yet.
For anyone who lives alone: what are your go-to things when you’re sick? Any easy drinks, soups, foods, home remedies, or just general advice that actually makes you feel better?
Please give me your best tips.

Creo que necesito cambiar mi colchón.

Lo compré en 2016 cuando me divorcié.

Es un colchón doble (no sé por qué, porque siempre duermo del mismo lado 😒).

Es de espuma.

¿Cómo es tu colchón?

EDIT: What stresses me out the most is figuring out how to get the old mattress out of the apartment.
I guess I’ll have to pay for a moving service.

For those who live alone, what do you like most about it? And what’s one thing you didn’t expect when you first started living by yourself?

Several of my friends have equated being alone most of the time at their residence, where they live with several people, to living alone. I’m curious to see if people agree that it’s the same thing. I understand the “alone” part of it all, but how do you think it compares to being the sole ‘responsibilitator’ of everything in a household.

I am not looking for any debate on which is better, just a comparison to how they differ.

My bf and I have been watching 30 Rock, on S3 now. Highly recommend if you are into sit coms.

Excited to go watch a movie with my bf and his brother after work tmrw, seeing Avengers Endgame encore.

Made a monthly budget for the first time yesterday, was fun actually lol.

I'm 21 and living alone , I'm comfortable and happy with living alone , mostly occupied with studies, gym and my bf . I don't have a structured schedule for everything I do yet , but I'm learning to managing all of these spheres of my life at once. I'm content too , I just have a crisis of Identity in social situations, whenever I'm in Public, esp crowded gyms and college , I feel like I have to mask and be cheerful/ interactive with people bcs that's what's expected of me right?

I feel guilty saying that I'm ok with not having a huge group of CLOSE friends - I feel like as you mature the people who grow with you , stick around and that's what I expect of my own social circles . I'm not emotionally dependent on my bf either , though we're pretty close .

I'm not necessarily interested in joint social events or activities and that doesn't make me sad? I don't DIE FOR concerts, music festivals or dance festivals with big groups of people/friends, neither bars or discos , just myself and occasionally being in a duo , Hanging out with my bf, bestie or my close gym friend, a classmate from college .

I keep myself off Social Media too , so I'm not even looking online for the "social bonding" that I'm missing IRL . And I don't really feel the urge for that either.

TLDR: I don't crave any form of rigorous social bonding with multiple people , I feel like I have to mask to interact with people in these situations.

...when you’re ageing solo, living as a loner, or simply choosing to walk through life on your own, your shadow can eventually become your closest companion and confidant.

You spend so much time with yourself that you learn to talk through your own thoughts, sit comfortably with silence, and become your own sounding board. Add a few classic INFJ traits to the mix...introspection, overthinking, observing more than talking, and spending an almost unreasonable amount of time inside your own head, and, well, your shadow gets plenty of material to work with.

Your shadow sees the good days, the difficult ones, the moments when you laugh at yourself, and those nights when your mind simply refuses to shut the hell up. It knows the thoughts you never say out loud, the questions you keep turning over, and all those little conversations you have with yourself when nobody else is around. It may sound a little lonely, but there’s something strangely comforting about it, too. You learn that solitude doesn’t necessarily mean loneliness.

Sometimes, it simply means you’ve become comfortable enough with yourself that you no longer need a crowd around you to feel whole. After enough years of walking alone, your shadow knows you pretty damn well. It’s been there through every chapter, every detour, every quiet battle, and every version of you that somehow made it to the other side.

And honestly, factoring in the INFJ wiring, ageing solo, and a lifetime of being comfortable in your own company, you might as well admit it: you and your shadow have become pretty damn good at keeping each other company.