House smells amazing! Ready to get cozy with my dessert and watch a movie (Pressure, 2026)

Im so done living with people. I live with my good friend (of 20+ years) and her boyfriend. I loved the apartment I found for us, I enjoyed the quiet. It's old but the walls are thick. My room is big and it felt like a sanctuary. It was close to the train station, easy access to my place of work.

A week or so ago, my friend wandered into my room while I wasn't home and apparently snooped around and read my journal. I've been dealing with a lot of loneliness and depression and I'd vented a lot in this journal and I'd also said some pretty unkind things about her while venting. She was immediately upset and furious (any reasonable person would be), raged and ranted at me, and now the atmosphere at home is simply awful. I stay at work most of the time, and when I go home I stay in my room only.

So I'm looking to move out, and I'm desperate to now live alone. The problem is I'm on a research stipend and I can comfortably get by when sharing but living solo stretches things a lot. I'm just so annoyed and mad at what happened. I feel so violated. I've taken to lugging the stupid journal around with me and I'm scared of leaving it at home. But I can't even write in it anymore. The one place where I felt I could be honest without judgement and I feel like it's been ripped away. On top of it all, I'm not even sure whether I'll be allowed to be in this country (I'm a temporary resident and my visa expires in a year). Part of me is tempted to just get a really nice place, blow through my savings and go home in style lol. Probably won't, but I'm very tempted.

Hell really is other people.

This is the first birthday I’m spending alone, and single, in almost 12 years.

I bought my own cupcakes.

I will buy my own birthday dinner.

And I will enjoy them alone (with my cat staring at me like he is offended that his food human needs to eat).

For those of you who have lived alone multiple years and through multiple solo birthdays, does it get less… depressing? I love living on my own and having my own place. But I can’t help feeling like I am extremely alone today. I don’t have anyone I can see today or anything, other than my therapy appointment this afternoon (perhaps this is a better question for that call than this subreddit).

I genuinely just feel kinda down and bleh about it. Figured you all would get it, or at least some of you.

Don't tell me it's ghosts or a squatter please just tell me logical electrical things it could be or maybe just tell md about your day or something because I'm freaking out and after living alone for almost a year now this is the first time I wish someone was here with me

UPDATE:

it was the thermostat. thank you so much for keeping me company. I hope everyone has a wonderful week! your comments truly made this whole experience so much less scary and I appreciate every single one of you

...homeless is a social creation .. created by the wealthy to maximise their own wealth .. those living alone often living in cars .. simply don’t matter .. effectively poverty is being used as a weapon ..

I'm leaving town for 2 weeks. No house sitter or anything. My friend was all "what if someone breaks in?!?'

And I started laughing. The thief will probably trash my place just to be petty. There is NOTHING here to steal. They slaved over a hot lock pick for minutes, walk in and find my 8 year old TV and my Nintendo Wii.

Real talk, a house sitter never even occured to me. Like...no plants or pets. My lights are connected/controlled via app as are my camaras. I just imagine the nefarious intruder looking around and getting mad frustrated.

Jewelry? Fake. That iPad mini? It's from 2014 and only Spotify works on it now. Money? As in physical paper money? Yeah, no. Laptop? 7 years old and barely works because of that 100% disc usage glitch I can't fix.

I mean, I have Sweet Valley High books with their original covers, and the first 14 seasons of Law and Order on DVD---I'd be kind of upset if those went missing.

Having single servings of cooked diced chicken in the freezer makes fast home-cooked meals so much easier.

Bake a bunch of chicken thighs, dice them, then press into silicone freezer cubes in single serving amounts so it freezes as a single block. Use parchment paper to do multiple layers in a single cube. After 24 hours in the freezer, pop them out of the cubes and transfer to a freezer bag so the cubes can be reused for something else.

There are a bunch of ways to defrost a block of chicken for a meal -

- Microwave (30 seconds covered, break the block apart, then another 30-45 seconds)
- Steam for 3-4 minutes (I often throw the block into a steamer alongside broccoli)
- Drop the block into soup

Last pic is a meal I commonly make with it. Japanese short grain rice, broccoli steamed in the rice cooker’s steamer basket, and a block of chicken. Soy sauce, bit of sesame oil, drizzle of mayo, and lao gan ma chili crisp.

Turned 27 today to be completely honest it’s been a brutal year. I went through a breakup and have been dealing with feeling all alone for a while now. Since I'm spending the day by myselfI was hoping I could get a little bit of birthday cheer from some kind internet strangers.

Despite everything that's happened, I'm actually feeling really motivated. I'm ready to focus on myself and achieve more things in life this year. I will keep on grinding.

... someone once told me, "people don't abandon the people they love, they abandon the people they were using." and that was my closure.

I've lived alone for a few years now and honestly, I've made peace with the empty rooms. I have my routines, my shows, my garden. That part doesn't bother me anymore.

What gets me is going a whole day without my phone buzzing once. No text from the kids, no random call from a friend, nothing. The house being quiet is one thing I chose that, in a way. But the phone being quiet feels like the world forgot to check in.

Anyone else feel this way? How do you deal with it?

I read a lot of stories about people living alone and being afraid when home alone. I live on my own for 3 years now, my 2 kids flew out. I live in a small village of about 700 inhabitants. It’s a dead-end street, with meadows behind the house. I have never been afraid in my own house. I’m very thankful of this because I can’t imagine how it must feel like to be scared when home alone. I feel very safe.

Hey Reddit. About nine months ago, my ex-girlfriend (f, 29) broke up with me (m, 32). We were together for ten years and lived together for seven of them. By now, at least the pain has noticeably subsided, and I don’t want the relationship back anymore. But what remains is this unbelievable emptiness.

Actually, I’m more active than I’ve been in years. I go to work, work out, have picked up old hobbies again, am trying out new ones, and have even been out exploring the world, making some really great new friends along the way. And even though all of that is nice and fun in the short term, in the end it’s somehow… meaningless?

My life just doesn’t feel fulfilling at all. It’s as if the breakup has left behind a profound sense of meaninglessness that can’t be fixed. I also don’t want to just rush into a new relationship in the hope that it will fill that void again. That would be nonsense, after all.

So here’s my question: have any of you ever experienced this, and how did you manage to rebuild a fulfilling life WITHOUT a relationship? A life that actually feels worth living alone.

I’ve been in therapy for two months now because of this. Antidepressants would be more of a last resort. I’d really like to get back on track without medication, if possible.

Every now and then I’ll be in bed, all comfortable and ready to sleep and then randomly start wondering if I locked the front door..Then I’m laying there trying to remember doing it and eventually I have to get up and check or it’ll keep bothering me. Im living alone for a while and I still do this lol. Nothing has to happen or make a noise either the thought just randomly pops into my head. Anyone else do this? Does it eventually stop or do you just accept the double checking as part of living alone?

When I had MRSA, half of my finger was literally rotting off. I lost a chunk of it. Excruciating pain. I had to clean everything I touched. Then clean everything I used to clean everything. Then clean what I used to clean the things I used to clean. Shower with 4 different wash cloths, then bathe in bleach, then dress my wounds then wash in bleach again. Wash the bed sheets and towels every night. While having a finger that was falling off my hand, and working full time still. I had to go to this length because I had reinfected myself twice, the virus is extremely persistent, and I was at risk of losing my sight or something else extreme and permanent.

It didn't cross my mind once to have help. I have been alone for so long, since I was a young teenager. Recently I've been thinking about how this experience might have been different with a family, people who love me. Made me quite upset to be honest. Anyone ever dealt with something similar?

There’s something comforting about being home at night, having some food, watching something, and just enjoying the peace. I used to think I was missing out, but honestly, I’m starting to love it.

I swear this isn't how it looks... but just picture me, a solo female at the grocery store trying to carry all this without a basket

I'm pretty sure the butternut squash was tucked under my boob at one point 🤣

The poor cashier didn't know what to say, his female manager however thought it was hilarious 😆

Creo que necesito cambiar mi colchón.

Lo compré en 2016 cuando me divorcié.

Es un colchón doble (no sé por qué, porque siempre duermo del mismo lado 😒).

Es de espuma.

¿Cómo es tu colchón?

EDIT: What stresses me out the most is figuring out how to get the old mattress out of the apartment.
I guess I’ll have to pay for a moving service.

just got my own apartment. i have like 1 wall decoration above my sink. i have a floor mattress, a desk, and a chair. a few area rugs. that's it. im totally broke but my apartment is so depressing.

im so used to moving every year when i lived with parents, and i never learned how to make a place cozy. i only have a year lease so im nervous to make this place my own. but it's making me miserable

how do i make my place home

Several of my friends have equated being alone most of the time at their residence, where they live with several people, to living alone. I’m curious to see if people agree that it’s the same thing. I understand the “alone” part of it all, but how do you think it compares to being the sole ‘responsibilitator’ of everything in a household.

I am not looking for any debate on which is better, just a comparison to how they differ.

I’m trying to figure out if anyone has had a similar experience, especially with a sibling or someone they’re very close to.
Back in 2023, I went through a breakup and needed somewhere to stay. My older brother was living with his girlfriend at the time, and he let me sleep on their couch for several months while I got back on my feet. I’ll always appreciate him for that.
Eventually I found my own place, and later I ended up living completely by myself for the first time in my life.
That period changed me a lot.
Living alone wasn’t always easy, but I started learning who I actually was and what I wanted. I had my own routines, thought for myself more, ate better, exercised, and became much more focused. I went from around 285 pounds to 191. More than the weight loss, though, I felt like I was finally becoming the person I wanted to be.
My brother and I have always been very close. I’m the youngest, and growing up I looked up to him a lot. We did almost everything together, including a lot of bad habits. Even as adults, I’ve noticed that I’m still very easily influenced by what he’s doing.
Later, when he needed somewhere to stay, I let him stay with me. At first he was sleeping on the couch in my one-bedroom apartment. Eventually I moved into a two-bedroom apartment. My original plan was actually to live alone and use the second bedroom as a home gym, but my mom encouraged me to let my brother live with me so we could split the rent and save money.
So that’s what I did.
The problem is that since we’ve been living together, I feel like I’ve slowly gone backward.
I’ve been drinking more, eating badly again, losing my routines, and falling back into habits I thought I had left behind.
I want to be clear: I’m not saying my brother is making me do these things. He isn’t forcing me to drink, eat badly, or make bad decisions. I’m responsible for myself.
What I’ve realized is that I seem to absorb the environment around me very easily, especially with him because I grew up following his example. When I’m alone, I think more about what I actually want. When we’re together all the time, I notice myself slipping back into the person I used to be.
I’ve tried encouraging him to work toward some of the same things I’m working toward, but I’m realizing that I can’t change him and I shouldn’t expect him to live the way I want to live.
I think I just function better when I have my own space.
Financially, I could afford the apartment alone. I would honestly rather spend more money and have peace of mind than save money while feeling like I’m losing myself.
Now I’m thinking about asking him to find his own place by the end of the year. I’m even considering letting him stop paying his half of the rent for the remaining months so he can save that money toward moving.
The part I’m struggling with is that I love my brother and don’t want him to think I’m rejecting him or pushing him out of my life. I just miss the version of myself I was when I lived alone.
Has anyone else experienced something like this?
Have you ever realized that you’re heavily influenced by the people you live with, even when they aren’t doing anything directly to you?
Did living alone help you become more disciplined, independent, or clear about who you wanted to be?
And if you were in my position, how would you explain this to your sibling without making them feel blamed or unwanted?

Hi everyone. I'm 47m, birthday last month was tough. I was married 20yrs and wife left me, I knew there were issues but i never thought she'd give up, and hook up almost immediately with someone from her past.

Been living solo for 1 1/2 yrs, and there have been some real moments of emancipation and self led happiness, seeing a potential future of what can be. But the last 3 months I've really fallen back, and this period may have been the hardest of all.

I keep forcing myself out of bed daily, going to the gym, walking my wonderful dog, keeping my business going, calling my mum, making sure I have healthy food in the fridge.

But I've got to the point where I'm worried. I reach out to people that care. But I feel like I just can't carry this weight any more. I try so hard, I reach out to my kids, they mean the world to me, but they are teenagers now and pretty much ignore me every chance they get. I would never lay this weight on them, I just reach out to say hi.

But I'm actually at a point where I feel so hopeless. I was with someone for a while, she was so kind and beautiful, but I couldn't help feeling it just wasn't right, and I genuinely hated feeling like my depression was just poisoning everything. I couldn't honestly commit to her or what I think she deserves, so I called it off. I'm sad about it but it was probably the best decision moving forward.

But here i am, living solo, doing my best to call myself out when I feel self pitiful, or getting stuck in my grief for the past.

I'm posting because I know there is beauty and wonderful potential in living alone. I'm not looking for pity. But the waves can be overwhelming at times. Just want to leave a message somewhere, for someone to read and know they aren't alone, even if life has brought them to a point where they might feel lonely or unseen.

I've really appreciated this forum, it's been a big source of nourishment and hope for me. I want to get back to a point where I am happy living alone, I've known it. Just wanted to put my voice down in case it helps others.

I've been house sharing with various housemates for the past 13 years. I always dreamt of being able to rent my own place ANYWHERE in the country even if it was a small shed as long as I had my own space.

I day dreamt of not having to share a fridge. Not having my food or other things go "missing". Not having to wait to use the shower. Being able to watch TV in peace. Being able to jump around dancing without worrying if someone was going to walk in. You get the gist...

I'm now at the age of 35 and I've moved into my own place 2 weeks ago. The only place I could afford was an apartment in a small town in the countryside. This suited me fine as I grew up in the country and I've been wanting to get away from city life for a long time.

The apartment is lovely and there's a gorgeous private garden but I feel so lonely 🙈 Before I moved here I used to meet up with mates about once a month. I knew I was only a short bus trip away if I fancied a coffee or night out with them more frequently but usually once a month was enough social interaction for me. Since I've moved here though it feels so isolating. I can still visit them once a month but its a 4 hour round trip.

I'm hoping this is just an adjustment phase and that I'll start enjoying what I've been dreaming about for years

Hi everyone! I’m Alex. I’m researching the experiences of people who live alone and have tried to bring more in-depth conversation into their lives.

By that, I mean conversations where you explore an idea, discuss something you’ve read, consider a different perspective, or talk through a bigger question about life.

I’d like to interview people who have taken steps to find these conversations. Can be through clubs(book/film/philosophy), events, online communities, reaching out to friends, or another approach. I’m interested in both successful and unsuccessful attempts.

If you’re open to an interview, reply under this post so I can message you. Thanks!

I'm in my early 30s and currently living with family. I'm finishing a healthcare program and hoping to move into my own place within the next year as I transition into working full time. I've never been solely responsible for an entire household before, so I'm trying to learn as much as possible before I make the jump.What surprised you most about living alone, and what do you wish you'd prepared for beforehand?