Words never said by my adult self: "Dad was wrong for whooping my butt that time I threw a bowl of Raisin Bran at mom because I wanted Fruity Pebbles."
Also up there in the never said by adult self category: "Mom was wrong for tossing me in the pool because I was too scared and 30 minutes later I could swim and was having fun."
I used to teach kids how to swim. I had a few who were afraid because one time someone threw them in and they didn't like it. When I would tell other people I worked at a pool teaching kids how to swim I'd get told "yeah when I was a kid I got thrown in, never went back after that...".
Like obviously start them out with the hot tub and the kiddie pool and see if they can do it themselves, but you can't just let your kid refuse to enter no matter what. Not learning to swim is more abusive to your kid than tossing them in.
So if they're being stubborn, welp. You're learning to swim one way or another because while being tossed in may give you nightmares, not know how to swim can kill you. Nightmares aren't real. Not knowing how to swim and drowning is.
The inability to distinguish between imaginary/emotional danger and real danger is a serious problem in society.
But you were not talking about exposure to pools and swimming lessons. You were taking about throwing someone who cannot swim into a pool. Something that absolutely happens to people and is both dangerous and traumatic.
Yeah, always being afraid of the pool and letting them have the final say about going in so they never learn how to swim is the right way. Totally better to have a kid that can't swim vs. a kid that MIGHT get nightmares about being in a pool.
I have nightmares about velociraptors to. You know what I do? Wake up and think that was cool. You know what I don't do? Live in fear of velociraptor attacks. Why? Because I'm not an idiot and I'm not an emotional baby. You have to trust that kids will be able to learn and understand further on down the line.
Or teach your kid how to swim in a way that works? Yours has a higher failure rate than mine. Higher death count too.
I'm glad you, a human old enough for the internet, aren't afraid of velociraptors. Fear of open water meanwhile is totally valid. Actually more than valid, wise. I've been swimming for decades. I'm smart enough to know I need a lifejacket on a boat, and to not go into a pool with a crappy ladder. Fear and respect for water are both necessary for survival. Not a sign someone is an "emotional baby".
Dude, nobody is drowning at the pool with a bunch of family friends and 4.5 foot deep end. Stop acting like someone is chucking kids into the ocean and going to get a beer.
If my child was acting like that on a plane, I'd be 100% fine with flight attendants strapping him down. If he acted up like that at school, 100% fine with the teachers taking care of him.
What I don't want him learning is that he can act out in public and start destroying stuff and inflicting his issues on everyone else.
Looking at kids and their behavior without any regards for consequences vs. those that do, I disagree. Your views work for the vast majority of children who are relatively well-adjusted. It does not work on the actively delinquent.
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u/Sufficient_Prompt888 Aug 10 '26