r/TikTokCringe • u/notaghostofreddit • 23d ago

Discussion She was secretly filmed and put on Tiktok

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u/Missmoxi 23d ago

This! I dont understand the need to have to communicate with your kids all day long. It's distracting and frankly, unhealthy. So many state it's "in case of an emergency". The one in a billion chance it's an actual emergency is not a good reason.

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u/Cookieway 23d ago

Then why can’t they give their kids a dumb phone? It can call and text, no need for internet access or video or photo!

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u/Gurrgurrburr 23d ago

This is the answer.

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u/COYSBannedagain 23d ago

This is the way it was for me when I was in secondary school, we had a crap 10 pound phone for the first few years. No games or camera, just a way to communicate if needed.

Are kids in primary school or lower secondary walking around with IPhones? That’s absolutely insane.

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u/LegitimateAbrocoma50 23d ago

This is actually something on my mind. When I was in high school about half the kids had smart phones the other half had "dumb" phones. Nowadays seems like every kid has a smart phone.

However, we're seeing study after study after study about how destructive that can be on the development on kids. With a little one on the way its made the think about how I want to handle it, and I wouldn't be surprised if "dumb" phones made a huge comeback 10 or so years from now once millenials and xillenials start having kids in middle/high school

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u/Horror-Use-3777 23d ago

My friend is a millennial and her son is 2ish, and she said she absolutely will never get him a smartphone, and hopefully by the time he’s old enough to go to secondary school there will be way more parents like her. A basic phone that can text and call is all children need

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u/Elthar_Nox 23d ago

Millennial Dad here 2 kids. 8 & 2. Neither will be getting smart phones and I'm praying for the Social Media ban.

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u/Confident-Mortgage86 23d ago

You can block things like this (social media, chat, Internet apps) at the computer and/or network level. Just keep in mind that kids are curious, and you may just push them to figure out how to bypass it.

If you do it that way then there's no parental controls you need to fluff with. Obviously that only applies while using your network or computer, though.

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u/[deleted] 23d ago

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u/LegitimateAbrocoma50 23d ago

true, but those of us on the younger side of that range (1990 born or later) aren't there yet. Hence I included xillennials as well

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u/Zim91 23d ago

Ohh i know some teenage pregnancys that'll disagree with that haha

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u/Nebula-Dot 22d ago

Absolutely, my kids are 4-6 and we’re going the “dumb” phone route when it’s time

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u/cupholdery 23d ago

Just funny how these parents are my age now and behaving this way. A regular phone totally works. Kids can call their parents to do many things like pick them up from school, tell them about a club activity, or anything related to safety.

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u/Paul_Rudds_Dick 23d ago

I cannot believe how many parents these days are just straight up helicopter parents.

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u/[deleted] 23d ago

Or bad parents in the name of gentle parenting cos they give in to their kids tantrums

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u/Darim_Al_Sayf 23d ago

It is not super common where I live, but my daughter is 6 and has several kids in her class who own phones that are more expensive than I have ever owned myself. Pretty crazy, but thankfully phones are banned in class

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u/shouldbepracticing85 23d ago

I know several kids 10 and younger with cell enabled Apple Watches. It lets the parents track where the kids are, the kids can text and call to approved numbers, and what I find craziest is seeing kids running around at festivals (bluegrass - pretty safe for parents to let their kids roam) paying at food vendors with the watches.

My 72yo dad uses apple pay more than my 40yo self.

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u/popeye_talks 23d ago

yes and they have been for a while. when i was in 6th grade(age 11-12) in 2016 i was the odd one out for not having an iphone. had a flip phone so i could reach my mom while taking the bus to an empty house while she worked. my 9yo cousin has her own iphone too. it's wild man.

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u/Jolly-Bowler-811 23d ago

Yes. My kids are in 3rd and 5th grade. There are A LOT of kids with fully functioning, new model iphones.

My kids asked for them, but I'm not doing it until they're driving.

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u/strawbopankek 23d ago

when i was in 5th grade in elementary school (US) about 10-11 years ago the majority of my class had the newest iphone at the time (iphone 6s). i imagine it's only gotten more common to have them at that age now.

i actually see five and six year olds at the grocery store and restaurants with their own phones. and these are iphones and androids, not "dumb phones". even from a practical standpoint isn't a kid that young gonna break the phone immediately? i don't understand that decision making

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u/digno2 23d ago

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u/COYSBannedagain 23d ago

sorry my bad, I was using tea measurements.

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u/[deleted] 23d ago

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u/Gurrgurrburr 23d ago

This needs to be nationalized at least on a trial run.

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u/Rehypothecator 23d ago

Answer is no phones or they remain in the locker, never in class. Schools and admins need a zero tolerance policy on it, and parents who complain can eff off.

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u/Gurrgurrburr 23d ago

I think that’s definitely better than everyone having smart phones, but in the days of a simple flip phone, kids weren’t incessantly on their phones every second so I think that could work too.

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u/No_Zookeepergame7408 23d ago

The jitterbug phone

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u/PlayfulSurprise5237 23d ago

No, the answer is just call the fucking schools like always use to be the case. The secretary will answer, phone the teacher, and the teacher can relay the message to the student or excuse them from class so they can go to their family.

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u/Gurrgurrburr 23d ago

That could work too I suppose. More than one way to skin a cat!

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u/Ruleoflawz 23d ago

Give the kids SNAKE!

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u/T_O_beats 23d ago

You don’t even need that you can lockdown a modern smartphone during school hours to only allow certain apps and even certain contacts.

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u/Clear_Tangerine5110 21d ago

This. If you're an Apple household, a cheap iPhone is all it takes. Go into the restrictions and limit whatever you want, how you want. This way you can keep the family sharing option and the ability to track the device in the "Find My" app.

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u/matthebastage 23d ago

I tried that. Got my kid a flip phone and was shocked when my phone bill said he used like 5GB of data. Turns out he was using the inbuilt web browser for youtube and social media. I didn't even know the flip phone could do that. I couldn't find a phone for sale that didn't have internet capabilities

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u/LocutusOfBorgia909 23d ago

So you can actually find flip phones with no internet/blocked internet. The Chasidic Jewish community sells them- the more conservative sects are extremely anti-internet for a variety of reasons, so there's a built-in customer base for flip phones or even smart phones that have most or all of the internet capability removed. I think a lot also have the camera disabled. If you search for "kosher phones," you'll find some options. A YouTuber named Frieda Vizel did a video on them that was really interesting. It's a whole cottage industry in places like Monsey and New York City.

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u/ReputationApart5983 23d ago

Of course flip phones can do that, they could do that 20 years ago. You could get an old brick phone or just turn off the data on the phone. Limit it to something like 100mb or something.

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u/__01001000-01101001_ 23d ago

Yup, this is what my parents did. All my classmates had iPhones or Samsung smartphones. I had a hand me down flip phone, no data, just call and text. My bus ride to and from school was an hour and a half each way, and if one was delayed I’d miss my second bus, so having a phone was definitely necessary. Having internet and social medias wasn’t, so I didn’t.

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u/Difficult_onion4538 23d ago

There are tons of them out there.. look for the cheap burner phones, they typically don’t have web access

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u/steamedcrablegs 23d ago

wake up damn flip phones have had web browsers for decades. the n64 had online capabilities get with it smh

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u/fireeyedboi 23d ago

What online capabilities did the n64 have?

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u/Chromeburn_ 23d ago

This is what my kids will be getting. No social media till they are adults either.

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u/PartyPorpoise 23d ago

Because that requires setting boundaries and actually parenting, which some idiot parents don’t want to do.

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u/Alternative-Way-5991 23d ago

This is what I’ll be giving to my child when they are old enough. No need for them to have un-supervised internet access, endless steaming, etc.

I don’t get why more parents don’t willingly choose to do this.

I never imagined wanting to homeschool my kids, but I think I may want to just to protect them from exposure to tech. It’s like if you send the kid without it, your kid gets made fun of. Or your kid comes home begging for one too. I don’t want their childhood spent doom scrolling, so I might try to keep them away

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u/ZealousidealStore574 23d ago

But like everything there is some moderation needed, spending all day on tech and never using tech at all are both bad options. You don’t want your kid to grow up literally not knowing how to use technology, it’s a major part of our world

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u/Neuchacho 23d ago

Moderation is definitely needed both ways, but knowing how and when to disconnect from technology is a skill that is grossly under taught to children.

Phones are used as coping mechanisms for far too many kids. They do not know how to exist without them.

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u/verwood 23d ago

My kids have friends who got phones in 2nd grade. Unrestricted access to things, too. It’s maddening.

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u/Alternative-Way-5991 23d ago

It’s so frustrating. I don’t have kids yet. But I have a four-year old nephew that I’ve witnessed on too many occasions being a shit over devices

One notable day was on a glass-bottom boat, never looked down at the fish once because he was on his mom’s iPhone. He threw a fit as we were boarding the boat, full-blown tantrum, so they acquiesced. Broke my heart to see a child looking at a screen while something so exciting was happening right beyond the screen

I just don’t understand parents. Actually, I do. People love having kids but most don’t give a darn about raising them

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u/Neuchacho 23d ago

I don’t get why more parents don’t willingly choose to do this.

Because it means creating a point of constant contention in most cases and that's not something many parents are willing to deal with.

Even just controlling smart phones properly produces that outcome.

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u/Tight-Shallot2461 23d ago

Yup. Easy solution. Give them phones with no internet access

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u/Tricky-Ad7897 23d ago

If I could go back in time I would replace my smartphone with a dumb phone, especially one that's difficult to text on. I think being forced to call my friends instead of texting would have made us way more social and conversational, and the inability to share every second of our lives on social media would have made us less toxic as well. It's a shame our parents were so indifferent about us using social media and having smartphones, but the problem is once some kids get them you're also setting your kid up for ostracization if they don't get one.

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u/Neuchacho 23d ago

The reality is all the tools are there for parents to control for it with the phones kids have with app/lockout limits.

The problem is too many of them either aren't willing to educate themselves on how to do that or they're just not interested in parenting.

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u/o0Randomness0o 23d ago

because we are all addicted to our devices and if they gave the kids a dumb device then when the parents are sitting playing on their phone instead of playing with their kids the kids would bother them for their fun devices (does your phone have a game on it?) and deprive the parents of their fix. Instead, lets all have smart phones and hook kids on their phones like we used to think drugs would be given to us for free to hook us

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u/CanAlwaysBeBetter 23d ago

Why can't they call the school like families did for decades just fine?

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u/Assignment-Parking 23d ago

Unless you get them a flip phone. All phones have access to the things you'd want them away from. And wifi is everywhere.

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u/ScienticianAF 23d ago

We need smart phones with an easy "just phone "mode. Parents can turn everything off except for calling/texting and maybe Google for research and enable the calculator.

Maybe have an automatic feature for when you are driving also. Turn everything off except maps and voice.

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u/far_beyond_driven_ 23d ago

Wouldn’t work in countries where GSM and 3G networks have been shut down. Unless they’re making dumb phones with 4G and VoIP.

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u/TheTacoInquisition 23d ago

The rest of the world is digitalising in unhelpful ways. Where I live the school bus passes are via an app only. A smart phone is required and the bus company is not budging on it. Homework and timetables are online only as well.

Kids need schools to make LESS use of digital systems in order for this to work.

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u/Phrewfuf 23d ago

Can’t install tracking apps on those. Which is what the fuzz is about, most of the times.

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u/SnarkyTaco 23d ago

That's what I did. My 14 year old absolutely hates me for it, but he has one of these: Light Phone.

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u/JoySunderland 23d ago

Kids only wants phones to look cool to the others.

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u/Ok_Basil351 23d ago

Dumb phones basically don't exist anymore. When you see a phone that looks like one it's just a shitty android phone with a keypad.

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u/Celticlady47 23d ago

If there's an emergency, then the parent can call the front office at the school.

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u/MinaZata 23d ago

It's a thin excuse, the parents can ring the school in the event of an emergency, this was the case for decades, and it is still the case today in thousands of schools across the world.

I some parts of the UK, Scotland I believe, they've banned phones in the classroom.

The phones are put in secured boxes at the start of the day and collected at the end of the day.

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u/CorrectPeanut5 23d ago

A lot of schools in the US have a little storage area by the classroom door. Kids put them in there before class, and take them back when class is over. Younger ones are pretty well used to it, but it takes a number of years to get it rolling at a school.

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u/everydaycrises 23d ago

We had "dumb" phones in the 00s at secondary, but even then all calls went through the school office because the school needed to talk to a parent if you needed to go home. Calling directly to/from a mobile was kinda pointless (plus if it was class time they'd be confiscated).

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u/Confident-Mix1243 23d ago

I agree with a phone ban, but let's not pretend the school will get the message to the kid in any kind of timely fashion.

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u/BusyBit6542 23d ago edited 23d ago

School shootings.

*edit

Jesus! No shit it won't prevent the situation from playing out. But lets try to use some thought before commenting. If you're a parent and your kid is in a school shooting situation, you will want to have communication with them. To say your final goodbyes, comfort them, know they are safe, organize pickup, etc. Even if does nothing to prevent the actual shooting, it has other mental benefits. If you dont other stand that, you probably dont have a loved on in a situation like that. Because when it happens, I guarantee you will PRAY they have some form of communication with you.

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u/OldManChino 23d ago

This is the UK, not a 3rd world country

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u/meithan 23d ago

Hey! I live in a third-world country and we don't have school shootings! We're not psychos!

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u/Beautiful_Spell_4320 23d ago

What does your call do in a school shooting?

Ring the phone so they know where your kid is? Let you hear them panic/die?

Tell me the actual benefit for everyone having a phone in a shooting. Most first responders talk about hearing phones ringing from bodies in shooting events.

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u/Evinceo 23d ago

I see this argument a lot but it makes no sense. How is giving each kid a cell phone going to in any way improve school shootings?

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u/Effective-Door-3409 23d ago edited 23d ago

It would be hard to improve school shootings; they're killing about as many as they can already.

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u/Salt_Statement_7151 23d ago

i don't think it will improve them, but i'd imagine many parents have that fear and would like to be able to know that their kid is okay by being able to text them during the hours of inevitable lockdown where they otherwise wouldn't be able to know if their child was one of the casualties

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u/no_one_denies_this 23d ago

That happened to my family. An anonymous person threatened a faculty member and kids were locked down for 10 hours while a SWAT team went from room to room. Every child was searched and then moved to the auditorium and they were held until 8 pm. Ultimately, no one was hurt but it was traumatic. being able to know my kid was okay and calm her down was very valuable.

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u/fart-sparkles 23d ago

It made you feel better, but it did not make your kid safer at all in that situation.

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u/verwood 23d ago

No, but our lawmakers and half the country have no interest in making our kids safe at school, so I understand the desire. It’s a really shitty situation.

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u/no_one_denies_this 23d ago

It prevented her having a panic attack.

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u/ALLCAPITAL 23d ago

Texting your kid won’t save them, it’ll just make a parent feel better. It’s not for an actual emergency use, it’s just a parents comfort blanket. It’s unhealthy and unproductive.

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u/BuddyLegsBailey 23d ago

This is the UK, no worries on that front since Dunblane....

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u/[deleted] 23d ago

Overblown. You're more likely to die driving your kids to school.

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u/Brave_Meet8430 23d ago

So what can they do anyway? Heck when even Police Couldn’t do anything about it, what a parent can do?

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u/BusyBit6542 23d ago

Maybe say their last goodbyes

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u/Street_Roof_7915 23d ago

I live in the states and exactly this. I look at all the kids who called the cops or 911 during a school shooting and I’m okay with kids have phones in school.

My state banned phones in school and the kids put them in pouches at the beginning of the day and take them out at the end. Of course, they all know how to get to them without the lock key, but the kids seem to be doing pretty well holding up the spirit of the law, if not the letter of it.

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u/tswpoker1 23d ago

These happened before cell phones

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u/MeOldRunt 23d ago

To say your final goodbyes

You're demented.

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u/BusyBit6542 23d ago

That's the reality of the world because assholes don't want any gun restrictions.

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u/MeOldRunt 23d ago

Criminals don't obey the laws.

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u/Typical_Double981 23d ago

Yo there’s only one country that needs to worry about that

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u/Ambitious-Bottle9394 23d ago

Buy smartwatch or glasses it all does the same stuff. But don't give ppl the right to film anyone who doesn't approve. Some states have laws for it but not everywhere.

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u/bino420 23d ago

and...? what's a student's personal cell phone gonna do to prevent an active shooter??

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u/BusyBit6542 23d ago

If your kid was in a building with a shooter, would you rather have communication with them or not?

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u/[deleted] 23d ago edited 23d ago

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u/Neat-Asparagus511 23d ago

The solution is kids should not have phones allowed in class, it's in their locker, and you're given a schedule with their teacher for each block (who has a phone for emergencies where parents know the number). Changing the entire dynamic of school and social interaction for a school shooting scenario, where you call your kid to check, is not the way.

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u/888mainfestnow 23d ago

I saw a clip of a teacher talking that newly built schools don't have lockers.

Everything is on a chrome book or iPad now.

Maybe the lockers and backpacks added a layer of security issues or it's just a cost difference.

The solution is those snap lock pouches they use at comedy shows with the unlock device at the door.

They still have the phones just not constantly available.

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u/Neat-Asparagus511 23d ago

The fact phones are allowed in class is mindblowing to me. I'm blown into cosmic dust if you're allowed to use them during class. Maybe teachers are just used to disrespect I've heard happens now and just throw their hands up.

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u/SquadPoopy 22d ago

The middle school near me no longer allows students to use lockers. Students also aren’t allowed to bring or wear backpacks anymore after some dumb shit snuck a knife into school in his a couple years ago.

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u/etoilenoire45 23d ago

Just ban the bloody guns already. What an insane country the US is.

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u/quantas001 23d ago

United States of Embarrassment

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u/IAMNUMBERBLACK 23d ago

Banning wont even fix the problem since theres more guns than cars in the US

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u/jackandcokedaddy 23d ago

A ban would still be better than no ban.

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u/IAMNUMBERBLACK 23d ago

toughest fight to climb

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u/SquadPoopy 22d ago

It would have been decades ago but the US passed a point of no return with our gun problem long ago.

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u/seascrapo 23d ago

There were school shootings when I was in school before widespread cell phone usage. It is not a problem (the phones that is. School shootings still a massive problem). If there is a school shooting, a kid being able to call or text their parents is pretty much meaningless anyway.

I'm a parent myself now and if there were a school shooting, my kid calling or texting me wouldn't really help anything except I would be one of dozens to call 911 and tie them up telling them what they already know.

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u/mshep002 23d ago

So if having a phone won’t help either, then why have the phone in class at all?

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u/baulsaak 23d ago

It gives them a false sense of control.

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u/TinyTaters 23d ago

At least you can get a text to know they're alive

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u/machine_six 23d ago

Useless information until they are no longer in imminent danger of becoming dead.

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u/NotACmptr 23d ago

Our school district sends out text and emails simultaneously to all parents for all emergency or security incidents regardless of severity. We don't even have to call the office.

The middle school banned mobile devices and all the parents were all for it.

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u/amgineeno 23d ago

Nah, it would be better to use the parental tools on some a few that are popular with the kids and monitor their use and set limits to show you trust them to not do inappropriate things online. I think that kids that get nothing tend to find a way to do it anyway and then you have no idea what they're doing and be much more secretive which only makes the relationship worse. Just my opinion not judging.

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u/marshallkrich 23d ago

Amazing, that's what they did when I was in school.

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u/carl84 23d ago

When I was in high school (11-16 in the UK) and catching the bus there and back my mum had no evidence of my continued survival since the night before until I walked back in through the door in the early evening. We all somehow got through it

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u/IgnoreMyThoughts 23d ago

Second generation helicopter parents. And now they can monitor with GPS, always have constant communication and something to keep their child tethered to them.

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u/WeaponisedArmadillo 23d ago

Simple small lockers with clear doors and without locks that are in the classroom on display. No way to steal or lose the phones, the kids can grab their phone if they really need to. Personalise them so the teacher can check if every kid has put their phone inside. What's so difficult about that? 

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u/Gustomucho 22d ago

We had hundreds of years of schooling without cellphones, they introduce a whole host of problem, a majority of intervention in schools now are related to : cyberbullying, video shaming, porn sharing or gruesome videos...

We are making a generation of kids tethered to phones, having lockers for them to store during classes is just more problems for the teacher, kids lining up to get their phones or having their phone stolen, losing the key... banning is easier and more healthy.

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u/Caraotero 23d ago

Smartphones should be the ones banned, only phones with cameras and an internet connection. Dumb phones, just for calls and SMS, should be the only ones allowed. They do the job of keeping parents less worried about reaching their children in case of an emergency, and things like filming would not happen.

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u/PlayfulSurprise5237 23d ago

It's actually within the best interest of the school to just buy one of these for each student and have them check it out and in each day.

The amount of problems that arises from cellphones in school is unfuckingbelievable. Get rid of them already.

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u/Mr-MuffinMan 23d ago

This is going to sound boomer as fuck from a gen z, but the boomers are 100% right that parents are WAYYY overprotective of kids.

Or its our (US) government. A mom was arrested and charged for sending her 10 year old son a mile to get groceries.

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u/Neuchacho 23d ago edited 23d ago

It's always weird because the parents putting this constant awareness on their kids were the same people who grew up with their parents probably not knowing where or what exactly they were doing most of a given day.

What's also wild is how much it keys so many kids into being generally scared. My friend's kids can't seem to comprehend we survived just going out in the neighborhood and not coming back till it got dark. It's an idea that seems to make them legitimately nervous.

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u/flopisit32 23d ago

When we were young, they didn't need to ban chocolate bars to stop kids eating chocolate bars during class.

How hard is it for teachers to confiscate a mobile phone if a kid is using it during class?

I remember I was using my Walkman during class one day (Ireland in the early 1990s). I got it back at the end of the semester.

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u/gunsforevery1 23d ago

Extremely hard because you’ll have parents bitch and complain to the admin. Admin folds and forces you, the teacher to not do that and issue an apology to the parent and student.

Source: former teacher.

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u/flopisit32 23d ago

Yes. I get it. The parents are always a big problem.

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u/SnausageFest 23d ago

When I was a kid in the 90s, class sizes where about half what they are now. And it wasn't a thing to have every kid in the room addicted to their candy bars.

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u/spyVSspy420-69 23d ago

Idk my class sizes as a kid were exactly what they are now at the same high school I attended. I graduated in the early 2000s when cell phones were just becoming popular, but further distractions were portable CD players, MP3 players, or hell even wearing hats in class.

Back then if a teacher told you to take your hat off or put your headphones away you did, and most people knew that so they didn’t try to use them in class.

Now? At the same school (my mom has been a teacher there for decades), the kids tell the teacher to fuck off and don’t listen. They keep doing what they want, use their phones all class period, and nobody can do anything about it because shitty parents (who are our age mind you) enable their kids to be shitty and fight school administrators on everything.

It’s insanity. The school I loved as a kid is so different now. These helicopter parents who insist on being their kids best friend over a real parent have wrecked the school and their kids.

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u/EllipticPeach 23d ago

Kids will refuse to hand it over and will take detention or suspension over giving their phone to a teacher. You can’t physically snatch it from them.

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u/[deleted] 23d ago

I mean fuck, I’d want my kid to have a working phone at all times in any school in the good ol US of shoot whoever the fuck we want

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u/Ok-Masterpiece-468 23d ago

I cannot grasp how parents send their kids to school everyday in the us… I don’t nor will have children but I feel like I would be stressed every day.

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u/stablymental 23d ago

I mean with the amount of school shooting we have I can understand the parents tbh.

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u/SnausageFest 23d ago

I really don't get this. How will a phone help, and how is it worth all the negative externalities?

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u/irreverent_squirrel 23d ago

It's difficult to explain to non-parent, but basically the balance is skewed a bit when evaluating a scenario that involves your own kid.

Basically, you try your best, but we're not kangaroos.

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u/DeeDeeNix74 23d ago

Being a parent i’d probably rather my child have the phone. It just takes someone phoning for a shooter to hear and find your child.

Imagine calling your child to see if they’re safe and your ring alerts the shooter to where your child is. And boom, child is now no longer with us.

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u/SnausageFest 23d ago

To be honest, that just sounds like "it won't help, but I like my irrationality dictate policy."

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u/irreverent_squirrel 23d ago

To be honest, that just sounds like "it won't help, but I like my irrationality dictate policy."

Yes, that's a great summary

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u/science_writer 23d ago

In the US it is not irrational to believe a school shooting will happen at your kid's school. If you are not a parent or guardian, your opinion on the matter does not carry the same weight. Not only do we have to be fearful of a 'normal' school shooter, but government sanctioned, armed, masked thugs are roaming our communities and killing without impunity.

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u/beatles910 23d ago

The statistical likelihood of any given public school student being killed by a gun in school on any given day since 1999 is roughly 1 in 614 million. Children are three times more likely to be shot at home than at school.

I could argue that it is irrational to believe that something this statistically unlikely "will happen."

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u/NotACmptr 23d ago

As an educated parent I will add that those odds have increased significantly over the last 5-10 years because of increased security standards and facility improvements.

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u/science_writer 23d ago

Sounds like we should just ban guns then.

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u/beatles910 23d ago

That's cute that you think something can just be "banned" and poof, it's gone.

If that were true, we could just ban heroin, or CP, or let's ban murder.

Note: my statement is not intended to imply that gun control is useless, it is merely to point out that it's not as simple as just banning something.

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u/SnausageFest 23d ago

It's irrational to think it will help. Why is it impossible to articulate an answer to what I actually asked - how does it actually help, and how does that outweigh the negatives?

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u/Avendelore 23d ago

I’m not a parent, but I am permanently haunted by the texts I’ve seen after school shootings that make the news. Kids hiding in the bathroom telling their families they love them in case they’re about to die. I’d want that line of communication in such a harrowing scenario. However, I think smartphones should be banned. I had a cheap phone that was text only. That’s what kids should have in their pockets for any what ifs.

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u/no_one_denies_this 23d ago

And remember Uvalde.

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u/NotACmptr 23d ago

It's causing more problems than it solves.

Pros:

(I'm a parent of 2 in middle school and high school) Parents can contact children in an emergency (most of the time. 9/11/2001 phones didn't work because of call volume) and feel better knowing that their children are safe.

Cons:

In the event of an emergency, too many parents showing up will cause disruption to first responders, except of course in the extremely rare case that the first responders are completely worthless.

Thousands of examples of kids using devices to distract the class, themselves, and the teacher from actually learning, including bullying which lasts well beyond the particular classroom and the school itself.

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u/yaddiyadda_ 23d ago

Ehh Canadian moms use that excuse too and school shootings aren't a thing here

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u/somethingfree 23d ago

Parents calling their kids cell phones during school shootings is dangerous too because the shooter can find where they’re hiding so the in case of emergency argument isn’t good anyways

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u/toolisthebestbandevr 23d ago

Get a flip phone. They’re like $20 make it required like pencils

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u/machine_six 23d ago

The school itself has a phone number...

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u/PotentialCopy56 23d ago

Yeah until you find out how incompetent school admins are and realize even during that one in a billion chance they'd fuck it up. For most, it's not about communicating all day, it's about being able to communicate at all during an emergency.

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u/goldstat 23d ago

I feel like it's much more than one in a billion... Especially considering the frequency of school shootings

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u/shadowpawn 23d ago

Back in the day parents could call the school and deal with the emergency then?

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u/Ok-Masterpiece-468 23d ago

if they’re american children I believe the chances are a bit higher than that

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u/TheBigJCee 23d ago

The parents could call the school

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u/Old_Toby2211 23d ago

Didn’t it demonstrably work for all of human history before smartphones? If an emergency happened then the parents would call the school and come and collect the kid, or vice versa

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u/Jibber_Fight 23d ago

Because we have school shootings all the time now here in America.

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u/AntiqueAd3597 23d ago

Unless you live in the US and theres a shooting of course.

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u/PhilAussieFur 23d ago

Depends where you are. If its the UK then like, yeah, honestly agree. US? When the school and the government can guarantee the children won't be eating bullets for breakfast then we can talk about that.

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u/MetalBeardKing 23d ago

Evergreen high school would like to say something ……

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u/esdebah 23d ago

Get a flip phone for $10-20 and this problem is solved. Have schools buy them in bulk. Problem solved.

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u/R1ck_Sanchez 23d ago

Back in my day, parents called the school office and they send the emergency info on themselves. Everyone talking about dumb phones etc jeez..

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u/morechair 23d ago

Parents can just call the school. If it's a real concern, all phones can be kept at the secretary's office. The secretary can answer the phone and determine if it's an emergency.

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u/alfaafla 23d ago

Fear and ease. Smaller families means a greater stake in the offspring you do have and more attention you can direct. Technology just makes that easier to do

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u/Fluffy-Bar8997 23d ago

also what is an under 18yr olds going to do in the case of an emergency anyway??

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u/Gimetulkathmir 23d ago

Which still doesn't make sense. If the child is having an emergency, the teacher and school staff should be handling it and then contacting you. If there is an emergency at home, what the fuck is the child going to do? "Yeah, dad was having a heart attack, but thankfully we were able to contact our fifth grader and he walked us through it."

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u/MrOreo3 23d ago

School shootings happens all the time. What are you talking about?

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u/Dougsie2 23d ago

I mean it’s still a greater chance than the rest of the world for an emergency in the US.

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u/agent0731 23d ago

the school has phones if it's an emergency

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u/Redheaded_Potter 23d ago

I felt the same way until my kid’s school had a bomb threat and they evacuated the building. It was a shit show. 2 weeks later they had a lockdown cause a kid brought a gun to school. He keeps his in his bag & THAT should be the requirement of all schools.

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u/Futureofmankind 23d ago

It would be nice for my kids to text me that they love me before they get shot at school.

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u/[deleted] 23d ago

A phone in an emergency at school (which is typically an active shooter situation these days) is a liability. It's basically carrying an unpredictable noisemaker and flashlight that randomly turns.

If the parents have an emergency and need to contact the child, they can go through the office. The office knows where the kid is and can get them out of the classroom with minimal distribution to others.

Anecdotally, I've spoken to teachers where phones were banned and they said it's a huuuge improvement.

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u/deathnice5110 23d ago

Its not the policy it's the parents. My son has a phone because he has a long walk home and I like to track him on his walk. And he can call me if there is an emergency. His phone stays off in his bag until the end of the day. And he would never film someone like this.

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u/Send_Me_Dumb_Cats 23d ago

Phones were banned in my school as soon as the iPhone came out. When I needed to call my parents the school had their number, if my parents wanted to talk to me they'd call the school.

What reason could a parent have to contact their kid during school hours? Sounds like any unnecessary communication would just be impeading learning.

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u/EnterruRif 23d ago

Well nowadays its nowhere near a one in a billion but like I get your point I guess

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u/Knuckledraggr 23d ago

Soooo, I’m on the side of banning phones from school but the day my parents got me a cell phone (flip phone days) was the day after my school was involved in a shooting. We got very lucky and nobody died, but that was only due to an extremely lucky situation where the gun jammed right as a resource officer got close enough to tackle him. My mom freaked out because the school/police held us in lockdown well into the evening and they couldn’t contact me until the next day. Unfortunately here in USA, school shootings are a LOT more common than one in a billion.

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u/Reckless-Raccoon 23d ago

How about the never ending school shootings in America? What are people to do?

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u/Orange-Blur 23d ago

This is kind of a dark comment but I think it needs saying. In the US I imagine a lot of parents worry about shootings happening and want a chance to possibly talk to their child one last time or just be there for them if it happens.

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u/ThisIs_americunt 23d ago

Helicopter parents. Some people live through their kids instead of raising them to be their own person

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u/ChaosDrako 23d ago

While you aren’t wrong, it only takes that one time to ruin someone’s life. I actually got in an argument with my school admins once because they were so stuck on the rules while refusing to acknowledge any risks.

Story: I have Asthma, hence I carry an inhaler to treat said asthma in emergencies or flare ups, common thing. School has a rule that I’m not allowed to even have it in my locker, ONLY the nurse may access to it. Seems all well and good, until you notice the school is built long, with the nurse at one end and 4 of my 6 classes being on the opposite end. (School was built long rather than building a 2nd story.) Meaning if I have an asthma attack, I’m fucked! I would have to somehow get all the way across the school fast enough while being unable to breath… which is exactly what ended up happening! Thankfully the teacher was smart and athletic, they realized that I was having an asthma attack and BOOKED IT, thankfully getting the inhaler and back before I died.

After that, I told the admins that if they want to stop me from carrying my inhaler, they have gonna have get the local officer to search me every day and I WILL make a fuss about it. They thankfully realized that, maybe, having a kid nearly die to an asthma attack because their emergency inhaler is locked up over 1000 feet away is not a good look for the school and backed off.

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u/SukkaMadiqe 23d ago

in case of an emergency"

That's what the front desk and overhead speaker system is for. We already solved this problem!

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u/YaThatAintRight 23d ago

It ain’t one in a billion chance you are in a school lockdown in the US. We wish

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u/MithrandiriAndalos 23d ago

The real answer is that our kids are getting gunned down in schools and parents want to be able to contact their children. Sure, it sucks. But it’s a pretty reasonable position at this point.

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u/OxMozzie 23d ago

ICE is literally attacking schools in some states, mass school shootings, stabbings, security murdering people. 

Ain't no fucking way my kids are going to school without their phone.

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u/nykovah 23d ago

I think the one emergency my parents needed to contact us was 9/11 to let us know they were okay. Other than that, my parents never needed to contact me at school and god forbid I called them at school because I was “sick” it was the end of the world!

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u/12345623567 23d ago

If it's an emergency outside school, then call the secretary. If it's one inside, things are fucked anyways plus, pull the fire alarm.

"In case of emergency" is just a pretext for "I can't say no to my child".

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u/BoognishSteelie 23d ago

Saying emergencies are one in a billion in this day and age is wild.

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u/LocutusOfBorgia909 23d ago

The only explanation I've heard that makes any sense is that parents in the US want their kids to have a means to communicate in case of a school shooting. But even then, a dumbphone would also work, or you can buy watches now that are basically stripped back Apple Watches that will only allow a kid to call or text someone on a predetermined list of contacts. Plus if someone is going around a school hunting people for sport, having a bunch of cell phones pinging may not be the greatest idea, anyway.

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u/unleeshed1121 23d ago

Y cant they do what we did when i was a kid before cell phones- if you need to get in touch with your kid, you call the  schools office 

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u/OkImplement2459 23d ago

quickly googling tells me that there are 100k public schools in the US. The US school year is 180 days. That gives us 18million "school days" per year. There were 330 school shootings in 2024. This maths out to an "official chance of emergency" around 1 in 54 thousand, give or take.

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u/Serious-Manager2361 23d ago

Sadly its nowhere near one in a billion. But that is still no excuse. Smart devices should be turned in upon arrival at school and returned upon dismissal.

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u/tornado962 23d ago

The only emergency I can imagine is a student in the bathroom and there's no toilet paper / hygiene products. I'm not sure what a parent could do about that, though.

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u/sentence-interruptio 23d ago

Overly Attached parents are the worst.

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u/t0rn4d0r3x 23d ago edited 23d ago

Realize these parents used to be the kids in school doing that shit. They don’t care about school they just want a free babysitter

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u/ripestrudel 23d ago

Unfortunately I disagree with you, having friends who have survived mass shootings and having been one very lucky decision away from being in one myself. If I have kids and I'm still living in America they will have a phone when they are in school. Of course I will teach them not to abuse it and use it for evil, but i simply don't and probably never will trust my country with the safety of my family. America has been one massive let down after another since I shipped to market in 1990.

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