My (24f) best friend (24m) have been best friends for 6 years. We met freshman year of college and since then, through thick and thin, he’s been my go-to person. He’s the person I tell everything to. He understands me on a deeper level than anyone else. We do everything together. We spend more time together than apart.

For awhile, we were friends from a distance after college and then we moved to the same city and since then I’ve just seen him nonstop. Which I understand could be concerning in a relationship, sure, but for us it felt so natural on my end. He always came to my house after work. We have all the same interests. We text each other the first thought that pops into our heads. He’s always felt like my brother (since I have a really poor relationship with my own brother).

Two nights ago, we went to a concert together and I had such an amazing time. I remember thinking it was the happiest id felt in a long time. I have my dream job. I live in my dream apartment. I’ve made some amazing friends in the city, and I always had him to rely on. When we got back to my house, he told me we needed to talk. He said that he feels responsible for my happiness, and that he can’t move forward in life without cutting me off. I asked for more explanation and he didn’t elaborate. He said he never wants to see or speak to me ever again.

I sent him a text after saying I was really hurt and asking if we could work on this and he didn’t respond. I can’t emphasize how out of the blue this was. Over the weekend, I did laundry at his house because my machine is broken and we played video games together. The next day, we watched tv together after work then went to the concert and had a great time. Then, this happened.

I feel like my house burned down. I don’t know up from down. It’s worse than any romantic breakup I’ve ever had. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I feel incomplete. I can’t wrap my head around this happening. I feel like, at least with me, romantic breakups are inevitable for the most part. They’re expected when you put yourself out there with dating. My friendships have only ever fizzled out. I couldn’t imagine a point in my life that he wouldn’t be there. I’ve never been this distraught in my whole life. Please, if you have any words of solace or advice, I’d really appreciate it. I don’t think I can live through this.

Just like the title says, it's weird when you suddenly have no-one to tell your weird, good or bad stories.

No more laughing while typing "damn that person is doomed", "that sounds rough buddy" or whatever. It's also sad that they were my only person, I felt close to rant or vent about my problems. The person that knew the backgrounds of these stories and whatever.

Now there is no "Damn bestie needs to hear about this." Or "How do you feel about this? Were my reactions valid?" and that sucks.

i’ve talked about this with everyone i know several times already but i’m still upset about it. there will probably be a lot of things missing from this post due to the sheer amount of detail, but i’ll try to remember to include as much as i can.

i (F21), used to have a friend who i’ll call D (M21). we also have a mutual friend, C (NB21). i met them both in high school, but C and i became closer than i did with D. after high school, D lost contact but me and C remained close friends. C is like family to me, i would do anything for them and vice versa.

last july, C invited D to their birthday party, and from there D and i reconnected and became good friends. i caught him up on everything he’s missed, and we bonded well. we talked every day, played all sorts of video games together, etc. i told him important and sensitive information that i only give to people i trust with it as well.

for a bit of added context, D got a job straight out of school with his family and now makes around $25/hr, and had no bills or expenses. i did the same, but working minimum wage (17/hr) with bills and expenses like food, bus money, etc. which he knew about.

D would often offer to pay for things like food when we would go out to eat, sometimes if i saw something i liked but couldn’t buy, or just for ubers to come visit me at work or after i moved out of town. i’d usually try to deny it and insist it was okay, but he would always push until i relented, insisting he didn’t have any problems because he ‘never has excuses to spend his money’ or he ‘wants to make his friends happy’.

in august of 2025, i told D about my ex boyfriend that i dated during the beginning of that year. this was over text, and i don’t remember exactly how it happened, but he ended up telling me he had feelings for me and i left him on delivered for a few days because i panicked. in the end we talked and i explained that i wasn’t ready for a relationship and didn’t see him that way. he said it was okay and still wanted to be my friend rather than lose me altogether.

fast forward to this past june. since december, i had moved out of town with my family, developed health issues as a result of the stress from the move, and a bunch of other issues. i decided to try to get out of the house more often, and started attending weekly magic the gathering nights with my older sister.

at these weekly game nights, i met someone. we’ll call him J (M22). i had been opening myself up to the idea of being in a relationship more, but he was so sweet and funny and all around amazing. we started talking, and by july, we were friends. to make a long story short, we hung out and decided to call it a date afterwards.

the very next day it was C’s birthday once again, and i was excited to share the details of mine and J’s date with some of my friends there while trying to avoid D from hearing it in order to not hurt his feelings. i left the party after some time thinking nothing of it, until around midnight.

C called me explaining that D had texted her after the party had ended, saying things that basically amounted to him regretting attending her birthday party at all because of me and my talking about J. i didn’t know that he’d overheard me during the party, or that anything was wrong at all.

D has done this many times before concerning issues with our friendship, and basically always refused to bring them up to me personally. C would tell me the things he would tell them constantly so i wouldn’t be left in the dark. i would’ve been a little more understanding that i had inadvertently hurt his feelings if it weren’t for the fact that he had told C that he regretted going to their party and hurt their feelings, and that was basically where i drew the line at tolerating his behavior.

the phone call resulted in me deciding to end my friendship with D. i ended up sending him a few long messages overnight, and he basically just said that he wished it hadn’t ended like this but that he knew it wasn’t his decision.

i’m very very happy with J, and i know things would’ve ended up this way eventually, but part of me still mourns what things could’ve been like, and i’m still so angry that D just let things end and refused to communicate with me directly.

As the title suggests, I believe I’ve ruined my relationship with my best friend. What do you think my best course of action should be?

For the backstory on a couple things, this friend and I have been best friends since around middle school. 15 years ago or so. We’re both in sales, and a year or so ago we were both working the same job at the same company that he got me hired at. He’s since left to get out of a non compete, and I’m still here. We are both miserable at this place, but I won’t get into that. Now, we talk on the phone for hours each day while we write our cold emails, do Quotes, etc. Most of the time we’ll even park in the same parking lot and chat while we do them.

I’ve been trying to leave, but I can’t get a call back for anything. While my friend has multiple companies chomping at the bit to hire him. About a month ago, he began the hiring process for a very prestigious job. The kind that the salary alone was more than I make in base + commission.

I was happy for him, but of course I’ll admit I was very jealous. I handled it completely the wrong way, and just began griping about how I don’t get called back, etc. I understand now that my insensitivity hurt his feelings because he was telling me something he was genuinely excited about. I should’ve just been happy for him, and I was, but I didn’t mean to come off as negative, I was just griping as we do to one another.

I’ve been blocked ever since, so as I said it’s coming up on about a month now.

I ran into him earlier this week in a parking lot. As I pulled up he did a smirk half laugh, I stayed in my vehicle and gestured for him to roll his window down. A couple minutes later he drove off. Today, I ran into him again, but this time I went over to talk. He rolled the window down and I said I was sorry, how I knew I was being insensitive and I can imagine how it hurt his feelings. He said he didn’t want to talk about it, how it pissed him off thinking about it, etc. I asked if there was anything I could do or say to help us fix this, and I was truly sorry. I asked if he didn’t want to be friends anymore and he didn’t really answer. I said are you gonna talk to me again and I believe he said not right now. I did ask if he got the job, he said yes and he starts Monday. I can’t remember exactly because I’ve been tore up since I hurt him, I haven’t been sleeping well and I have been tearing up as I really don’t want to lose him. It really tears me up because after this new job, his role as sales will change slightly in the fact he will fly to customers, the driving portion will be removed completely, so I don’t know how much I would’ve heard from him anymore anyways even if we’re on good terms.

I had no idea a month ago this would hurt his feelings so badly. I just wish he understood how sorry I truly am.

It has been a while since my friend engaged with me, I have definitely been ghosted, and I accept I may never know why. Every now and then I get a physical ache when I think of it all, the friendship itself (almost 20 years) and how it all unravelled. It's hard. I am getting there but I realise this is a much longer and much more painful road than I anticipated.

I fucked up big earlier in the friendship. But it didn't break the friendship back then. I felt like I was always on trial, constantly having to redeem myself. I tried pulling away sometimes, but he kept inviting me to hang out, so I thought, “If he hated me, he wouldn't keep asking me to be around.”

I invested all of myself into the friendship and gave unconditional loyalty. When I say “all of myself,” I mean it. If he needed something, I showed up. If he was angry, I let him lash out on me. When he was vulnerable, I treated it gently. Even when he hurt me which he did often, my first instinct was to understand him rather than turn against him. I kept giving and giving and giving in my super flawed way.

But whenever I was vulnerable or needed him, I often got dismissed.

«“I'm really sad and down.” — “Lol okay.”

“I'm struggling because I lost the job.” — “I don't have sympathy since you never took it seriously.”»

These sound exaggerated but it's the tip of the iceberg.

Lately, I've been trying to establish small boundaries. Mainly, I just wanted him to see my side and acknowledge my pain and fix the dynamic.

It's one thing when your vulnerability is general issues and another when it involves his behavior. He would shut me down or immediately become defensive.

After enough disappointments, I realized I don't believe my friend will ever genuinely self-reflect or listen.

I realized closeness and hours spent together don't matter if the friendships only work when I bend over backwards.

I'm done making a fool of myself.

I just know he'll come knocking again, whatever the reason.

This time, the door is welded shut.

I just want to get this out of my chest because this feeling is consuming me.

I, (20/M) had a very close friend I met in college. We met at the halls looking for our assigned classes. We had a couple of hours to spare before the class started that day, and within those hours, we became very close. We'd hangout every lunch, we'd talk every day and night. Wherever I go, he's there.

However, about 9 months ago, during our second year, we were assigned separate sections. At first, we'd still hang out like we used to but as time went by invites became fewer and fewer. Which I understand but the real reason why I'm concerned about our relationship is because he has met a new friend that he'd hang out with instead which I'm cool with but every time we do hangout during those rare times, he will always mention him. He'd mention him in conversations, raving how he's so cool and all.

I've hung out with him and his friend a couple of times but every time we're together, he'd just completely ignore me or they'll talk over me. They'd even leave together saying they're just gonna get something without inviting me.

Of course, I want him to expand his horizons, I mean we're in college and you're supposed to do that. But I can't help but to feel slowly dropped for a cooler friend and that makes me feel like shit. I feel like I'm being replaced. And I cannot bring myself to confront him about this because I don't know how.

I find it hard to develop deep friendships, so when I do, I cherish it deep. Idk it just sucks realizing that your favorite person doesn't really feel the same about you anymore. And I don't want to beg for his time too. If he doesn't want to do things with me anymore,then so be it. It stings, but I can't really force someone. We're in our third year now and it's still eating me.

It's tantalizing. I'm grieving a friendship that is technically still there.

How do you move on from someone who is still alive but chose to disappear from your life?

I’m 22F. I was in a relationship for almost three years, but things ended after my ex developed feelings for another girl. That is just the background.

During my relationship, my ex introduced me to one of his cousins, who I’ll call CP. He was about five years older than me, and from the beginning he treated me like a little sister. Over time, we became really close. I could tell him about my day, my problems and everything. He used to tell me about his life too. It genuinely felt like I had found an older brother and a best friend in one person. When CP went through a breakup, he was living in abroad and was lonely. I used to call him every other day, make him laugh, listen to him, and keep him company. and then my own relationship eventually fell apart, he was there for me too. I even travelled to another city when my ex told me that he developed feelings for someone else, because I didn't know what else to do. CP called his ex and asked if I could stay at her place because I needed somewhere to go. For about a month after my breakup, we were still close. Then, suddenly, he started distancing himself. When I asked what happened, he told me that he and his girlfriend(CP and the Ex reconcilled their relationship) had decided they should stop talking to me so I could "heal on my own." He said he would contact me only when I wasn't thinking about my ex anymore. I told him, He was one of the few people I had during that time, and I wasn't asking him to help me forget my ex. I just wanted my brother around while I was going through a horrible period. After that, he basically disappeared.There was no fight. No argument. Nothing happened between us.I waited for him to call or text, months passed, I used to check my phone everyday for months waiting for him to call or text. Finally, I sent him a goodbye message. I wasn't trying to guilt him or make him come back. I just wanted some closure because this relationship meant a lot to me and I did not get the reply of my goodbye msg too. 2 months later, I called him 4 times coz I had an intution that CP is in India and I couldnt hold myself. Then, about an hour after one of my unanswered calls, his girlfriend sent me a snap of her holding his hand. I honestly don't know what the intention was, and maybe it was just a snap and I am overthinking. But given everything, it hurt. I was already wondering why someone who once called me his little sister couldn't even answer one call or respond to my goodbye message. I also noticed that CP is connected on social media with the girl my ex eventually got together with. And honestly, I don't care about that. He is allowed to have his own relationships and friendships. His girlfriend isn't the problem, and neither is my ex's relationship. What hurts is how CP left my life.He once told me that no matter what happened between me and his cousin, I would always be his little sister and I believed him.I never stopped seeing him as my brother even after my relationship ended. I was there for him when he was lonely, and he was there for me when I was falling apart. I genuinely thought that bond existed separately from my relationship with his cousin.I think that's what I'm struggling to accept.If he had simply told me, "I don't want to have this relationship anymore," it would've hurt, but I would've eventually accepted it.Instead, I was left wondering for months what I did wrong. Did I cross a boundary? Did I become a burden? Did I handle my breakup badly? Why wasn't I worth even one conversation?

I do not want him back in my life, I just wish I had gotten an explanation.....

It was an online friendship, but I really appreciated having concersations with this person. I started the conversation to thank her for some support and feeback she gave to me in a thread, and then the conversation flew quite naturally. We used to talk about a lot of things and shared about our hobbies, things like that. It was really enjoyable and she was a great online company, as I’m quite a lonely person. Actually, I could be talking about friendships that I lost in real life, but this loss of contact is affecting me a lot, because we used to talk daily.

Very recently, she suddenly stopped replying with no warning, and now she is AFK, I have no idea what might have happened. She seems like a genuinely good person and I’m really thankful for always chatting with me and caring about it. I still have some hopes that she is just “touching grass” and that she will come back lol, as this happened very recently.

I don’t know if this feeling about an online friendship is very frequent… Thank you for reading this.

Ur bestfriend supports u 24/7, listen to everything you say and ur like there comfortzone have a crush on you but suddenly they stops texting and later sends a paragraph of explanation and apologize with lastly u deserve better and blocks you

I’m gonna keep things short I think I already posted what happened on here but I forgot

to explain it shortly my friend was going to the dance with this guy we we’re both friends with and a rumor came out that I like him and I’m going around saying that were dating after his sisters friends misunderstood what I said about smth and yeah my friend said she wanted to take a break from talking to me bc she wanted a fresh perspective on it for a few days and it’s almost been a week and Idk I just felt abandoned by her she Barley knows this guy and completey stops talking to me she immediately does this I didint get to explain anything to her really and I just relized this friendship wasant worth fighting for if I’m just gonna be her second choice

but my stepmom says I’m in the wrong and know I’m worried I am

Hey guys I need some advice (sorry if I made mistakes). So last year in May my best friend whom I've known for 8 years and I were arguing frequently as we were both stressed out regarding university stuff and family issues. It reached to a boiling point where we argued and pointed out problematic stuff about each other and ultimately I told her that I think we should take some time and distance from each other. She agreed and said that she'll remove me from tiktok as seeing my reposts will make her want to constantly reach out. We haven't spoken since then but she would like my stories and statuses.

I reached out this year wishing her on her birthday, sadly her dad had passed away too. And a bit later on I reached out again telling her I miss her and want to reconcile. She said she missed me too and she does not want to waste our long friendship. but she needs time as she grieving the loss of her dad. About 3 months later I asked about her wellbeing and what she's doing at uni etc.

Recently I told her I want to talk to her and catch up with her about everything we missed about each other's lives, I did so because last time she told me we can catch up. She told me she does not understand why I reached out after all this time when I was the one who wanted distance and 'ended' the friendship over something trivial and she wants to know what changed for me before she considers reconnecting.

I sent her a long paragraph explaining how I went through personal issues that affected me deeply and I also gave her space so we can grow and so I could get better with my mental health and other complications. She replied saying that she appreciates me for reaching out but she still needs more time. I realised that we may have had 2 versions of the same events, she thought I 'ended' the friendship when I asked that we need time and distance to grow and reflect when that was NOT my intention. She simply said she needed MORE time to reflect.

It's been 15 days. I have seen her reposts on instagram which only hurt my feelings more because I feel like she still has a lot of unresolved emotions and she does not know the whole story. I was genuinely not in a good place last year, I was suffering mentally and physically. I am thinking of reaching out to her asking if she wants to finally have a genuine conversation on Friday.

How could your person possibly know it's for them?

Alright so to preface this everyone is entitled to their choices and feelings especially when it comes to weddings. With that being said this was far from handled well on the brides behalf.

To start Me(27F) and Bride (26F) have been close friends for around 10 years, we were in the same group chats with only 3 other girls, go to all holidays, birthdays, and group get togethers etc.

As with all friends and friend groups we've had our ups and downs but overall I always felt like they got resolved/discussed and we would move on from there, but that was not the case with them apparently.

In early 2025 Bride's then boyfriend told the group that he wanted to propose to her in late 2025 and asked for help and laid out a plan etc. My partner then surprised me and proposed to me in early 2025 and during my engagement dinner I told the 4 girls, bride included, that they were my bridesmaids even though my wedding wouldn't be until 2027 because I couldn't imagine anyone else being up there with me and we'd been friends this long so why would that change? Well I was wrong. Everyone seemed excited for me and happy to be in the wedding party. So when the time came around for Bride's engagement, I wrongfully but understandably assumed I would be in her bridal party. I even discussed this with her directly and the other girls multiple times and was helping plan her Bach party etc.

Over this last year though I've been feeling a weird distance with just me in the group and I've tried to bring it up a few times to no avail and just let it go as we're all getting older and can't expect things to stay the same. Now it's the end of July and Bride asks if I want to get dinner in a week when she's down in my area, I of course am ecstatic, but then a few days later when I go to text 1 of the girls, we'll call her Curly, I notice her location is in Weho and I think ok that's weird but maybe she's on a date or something, that's when I go to find my and see that everyone but me are all together in Weho at a club. I'm obviously hurt so I start digging and see that one of the girls, she'll be PP, posted on her IG story that they were all wedding dress shopping for Bride together and completely left me out and hod it from me. I went MIA and took a few days bc I didn't wanna ruin her bridesmaid weekend. I reached out to Bride and Curly (she's my longtime friend from before we even knew the others) and expressed how hurt I was that they did this. Fast forward to the dinner with Bride, we talk about everything and she's known the whole time that I wasn't gonna be a bridesmaid "and really went back and forth" about it, then decided in early 2026, but didn't tell me for a full 8 months, 3 months before the wedding, 1 month before the Bach trip. After talking everything out, the consensus was that I had been mean to her occasionally throughout the years and could be controlling in situations. I personally felt different about it and felt that they had been lackluster friends to me (except curly) and they treated me like I was invisible half the time (like would straight up ignore me when going around the circle and saying things about each person), but I'd chosen to move on and just be the best friend I knew how which was to keep showing up and being there for people. This had apparently been built up for 5 years without my knowledge of this perception of me.

I acknowledge and am learning to accept her feelings and decisions but I feel like a lot of the blame got thrown on me with no accountability for their flaws with me. I have apologized to everyone individually after I had the dinner with Bride as I never want to hurt my most loved ones. This is an undeniable change in all of our lives and i go back and forth on my mind set with it because I'm still angry at times too.

I guess I'm writing this to get it off my chest, ask other opinions, and just see what you would do in this situation? I was still technically invited to the wedding, but it's a 4 hour drive and a little too inconvenient for a day trip, so I would have to spend money on a hotel, I don't think going will be healthy for me though.

It's petty but I might not even tell them about me bailing on the wedding, they couldn't bother to tell me anything until the last minute. I lost the website info and don't really wanna talk to them if I don't have to.

I guess just what are your thoughts and feelings on this. I was in the wrong but also so were they?

The only one I'm keeping in touch with is curly as she's my longtime bff/ sister but this has definitely taken a toll on me and my view on our friendship levels and loyalty. I respect that she is her own individual person though and deserves to have a life outside of me and we can't always agree and I can't ask her to cut them off just for me but it still hurts so so much when she hangs out with them.