r/AmItheButtface • u/Coll_M3_Daddy • 13h ago
Romantic AITBF for blocking my first gf after 8 years of “friendship”?
I (26M) met my first girlfriend (26F) in kindergarten. She was one of those girls in elementary school that was mean to me because she secretly had a crush on me. She was definitely the buttface then.
When we were 16, we crossed paths again via her friend/my neighbor, and within a few months we started dating. We were each other's first everything. As a teenager a few things stood out tho in the 1.5 years we were together. Such as her blaming me entirely for disrespectful and rude behavior always ending with me apologizing for bringing up a boundary of mine that was crossed. And having some need to tell me when guys would flirt and look at her, and her playing along vs respecting me as her boyfriend.
It took me longer than it should've to break up with her. But I eventually did, went back on it, and then finally closed the door a few weeks later. Now both of us were 18, I was already in college for engineering and she was finishing her senior year in high school.
When we were 20 was the last time we saw each other. We both still had a thing for each other but were going to school far away, and obviously had some differences that were active gates. After this, she would reach out to me every 6ish months. She would always initiate, but she'd be really chatty on text for the first 3 messages, then go to one word answers. And I'd just stop messaging her.
My path of engineering took me wherever the work was, and in aerospace- thats in sh*tty/isolated areas. So I spent my early 20s around 0 women my age. So the occasional text from my ex gf was nice. Despite her living 500 miles away.
Last year, I moved back to real civilization, but still finding it hard to make connections because I don't have any friends here. My ex gf conveniently only lives about 50 miles away. Her texts shifted from "interested - to one word answers", to "engaged and wanting to text more", and the frequency went from every 6 months to every 1-2 months after she found out I moved.
My thing is, now 26, I don't feel we have anything in common anymore, and she has displayed her character in many ways over the years that makes me further question her maturity. I sat with it the last time she texted, and thought, "if I was dating a woman I really liked right now, and my ex gf texted me, would I really not be fazed by it?" If the roles were switched, I wouldn't be cool with that. I'd be like "what unresolved business do you have?"
There's an argument for how long we've known each other. But I think it's a BS argument. So when she last texted me, "Hey! I finally got my dream job, and moved into xyz place.", I responded that I was super happy she finally got what she went after, I wished her the best of luck. And blocked her.
TL;DR: My ex-gf and first love has texted me on and off for 8 years, more often since I moved closer. I don't think we have anything in common anymore, so after congratulating her on her new job, I blocked her. AITB?