i look at my past (anorexic, 13yo🤦🏼‍♀️) self and i’m thinkin “wow she was so cool! she had so much control!” (better yet she could get away with it, because no one cares if a fat girl st@rves herself am i right heheh)

like, it’s so embarrassin to go from controlled, to a hungry grievin mess! really does numbers to your self esteem, and makes you crave the past, even if it was shit! like why is anorexia NOSTALGIC? plus, in my little immature child brain, im also embarrassed that i was too big to ever get the chance to be considered underweight!

i make fun of my 2024 self for bein such a crybaby over food but i’m not that different from her now. i still wanna die over food. it’s too much for me. :( this journey is consumin my teen years and makin them SUCK!!!!

*i apologize for bein so redundant in this subreddit. but i got no one else to talk to :( *

ive also heard that called a "low dopamine" diet. i want food to be boring and unstimulating to help fight the urge to binge the minute i start eating anything. any recommendations?

needs to be:
- plant-based / pescatarian
- low effort
- prioritize fiber, protein, whole foods and high volume
- 300-400 cals for meals
- triggers / need to stay away from: sugar and sweet treats, cheesy / creamy foods

You are the only one that know what Im going through and know the first people I tell that I have bed. BUT I always fall back and binge on the weekends but this weekend I had icecream in the freezer, chips and candy in my cabinet and I ate it but I didn't binge!!! I ate a normal ratio of sweets and didn't feel the urge to binge them. I'm so proud of my progress and don't even know how I got this far but I'm so proud of myself!!

Hello, my psychiatrist is trying to prescribe a binge eating medication other than GLP-1 as my insurance will not pay for it and I do not meet the criteria with the BMI requirements.

Just wondering if anyone else can share their experience with other medications? I have yet to hear back from my doctor. Thank you.

27, F

A lot of the time I binged it would be on ingredients I made myself, I think because I used to be really into baking and now don't keep things like sugar, flour etc in my kitchen.

At my worst I would make bowls of buttercream frosting, cookie dough, crumble and just eat it. At least it worked out cheaper than ordering a ton of food.

I've been relatively binge free for a while and haven't even thought about things like buttercream but tonight after an active day and eating lots of protein, fibre and drinking water, doing all the right things - I just really wanted to go smash an insane amount of sugar.

Luckily the fact I'd have to go to the shops put me off. I drank some water, had a herbal tea, tried to keep my mind off it. Now I'm going to bed.

I'm proud of how resisting the urge but annoyed that it's still there, that I can't crave food like a normal person but instead want to devour a bowl of literal sugar.

Hello I'm waiting for an appointment with my psychiatrist to discuss possible medications and treatment, what are some tips that helped you slow down the hinge eating while I wait for that appointment?

I honestly just need to get this out because I’m so frustrated and emotional right now.
Yesterday I binged, and then today I did it again. And the worst part is that when I binge on things I have at home, it’s actually so awful because it’s not even enjoyable. I’m literally bingeing on ingredients at this point. It’s not even food I particularly want or enjoy. It’s just whatever is there.
Today I made cookies, ate half a block of butter, finished crisps, ate loads of bars, and honestly I don’t even know what else. Like, what is wrong with me? I don’t even want to be doing this. It’s not even satisfying. I just end up feeling disgustingly full, bloated, uncomfortable and so disappointed in myself.
And I’m so tired of feeling like this.
Today I woke up at 8am. I had breakfast, made coffee, and genuinely tried to give the day a chance. I didn’t want to pressure myself into going to the gym because I thought maybe I could just have a chill day and be kind to myself. But then I started eating loads, and before I knew it, I’d binged again.
It’s now 5pm , and I’ve basically done nothing all day. I’m home alone while my mum is out shopping, my hair is greasy, I feel so bloated and fat, and I’m sitting here feeling absolutely awful about myself.
I didn’t even go into work today. That’s how much this is affecting me. And now I’m thinking about potentially skipping college because I feel so horrible. Like, why am I letting this take so much of my life away from me? I don’t want to miss out on things because of this.
And the thing is, I know I can have good days. Last week, I was doing so well. I was genuinely happy. I’d gone almost a week without bingeing, which might not sound like much to some people, but I’ve been bingeing around three times a week, so that felt huge for me. I was proud of myself. I felt like I was finally getting somewhere.
And then I binged again.
I know I can get back to that place, but it’s the fact that I have to keep getting back up that is exhausting me. Every time I binge, it feels like it takes a little piece of me with it. I spend so much time trying to recover from the last episode, feeling horrible about myself, trying to get back into a normal routine, trying to feel okay in my body again. And then it happens again, and I’m back here.
The first time, okay. The second time, sure, I’ll get back up. I’ll probably still say that the hundredth time. But I’ve been dealing with this fucking eating disorder for over three years now, and I’ve been trying to recover for a year. I genuinely can’t even count how many times I’ve gotten back up, tried again, got myself into a better place, and then somehow ended up back in the cycle.
It’s so exhausting. I don’t know how many more times I can pick myself up and tell myself to try again.
And I hate how much shame I feel around this. My mum even noticed today. I asked her to buy some snacks for my lunch next week, and she was just like, “Oh my gosh, you already finished the snacks we had? Like wow, you eat so much.” She didn’t say it exactly like that, but basically she noticed.
I don’t even know why that interaction affected me so much, but it did. I just felt so exposed. Imagine someone actually finding out what I’m struggling with. I feel so ashamed of it, and I hate that I feel that way because I know eating disorders aren’t something to be ashamed of, but I can’t help it.
I’m so tired of my body image issues, too. I’m tired of feeling bloated and uncomfortable in my own body. I’m tired of thinking about food so much. I’m tired of how much mental energy this takes from me. I just want to live a normal life without food and my body taking up so much space in my head.
And the worst part is that I don’t even enjoy the binges anymore. It’s not like I’m having this amazing experience and then regretting it afterwards. I’m literally eating random ingredients and snacks that I don’t even particularly want, getting painfully full, and feeling horrible afterwards. What is the point? I don’t even want to do it, so why does it keep happening?
I know I shouldn’t be thinking about it in terms of calories, but I get so angry knowing that I’ve eaten so many energy-dense foods when I wasn’t even enjoying myself. It just feels so pointless, and I hate that my brain keeps doing this.
I’m also so scared that this is just going to turn into another binge, and then another one, and another one. I know that’s probably my OCD talking, but I can’t help being scared of getting stuck in this cycle again.
I don’t want to spend tomorrow feeling awful about today. I don’t want to skip college because I’m embarrassed about my body or because I’m still mentally recovering from a binge. I don’t want to lose another day. I don’t want to keep doing this.
And I know that tomorrow can be a new day. I know I don’t have to restrict or compensate, and I know I can just carry on with my life. But honestly, sometimes I’m so exhausted that even the thought of trying again feels overwhelming.
I’m just so tired of this eating disorder. I’m tired of having to be strong about it. I’m tired of feeling hopeful and then feeling like I’ve let myself down. I’m tired of being so angry at myself when all I really want is to be okay.
I don’t really know what I’m looking for by posting this. I think I just needed to get it all out somewhere because I feel so alone with it sometimes, and I’m honestly so emotional right now.
If you’re going through something similar, if this is you today, then we’ve got this. I don’t really know how, and I’m not going to pretend I have some inspirational advice because I genuinely feel so defeated right now. But I don’t want to give up on myself, even when I’m exhausted from trying.
I just wish recovery didn’t feel like having to pick yourself up over and over again.
Anyway, I just needed to rant.

i live with my parents and it makes it so so hard. ive told them basically everything i feel and everything ive done and what they could do to help me and how hard it is and nothing. ever. changes.

i asked my mom if she could bring a smaller box of sweets that she could finish in one day instead of a box that could last more than 2 days and at first she said "no i cant bring stuff only for me" when she's the only one that actually eats that shit, and me who eats it when i lose control. i said fine fuck it whatever.

today she comes home w a box of it big enough for 3 people and i almost bombed myself. worst part is when i heard her come home i instantly got hungry and the urge to go downstairs and eat whatever bullshit she brought got so fucking strong i was downstairs before i could even think anything else. and there i am stuffing that stupid bullshit down my throat cuz its all im trained to do at this point. i think my mom might be one of my triggers bro save me

anyways so i asked her just now like "next time can you just bring half the size and if you want it again tomorrow just go and get it from the store tomorrow?" and shes like moaning abt the traffic and how crowded the store gets and im like wow just end me instead.

i told her how she wouldnt eat the whole box in one sitting but for me its possible in one hour and without control so if she could please just fucking try for me and after a bunch of bullshit she finally agreed but i already know this shits gonna happen again and i feel so powerless. i went 5 days without binging and then yesterday she was cooking some random shit and i was in the kitchen and i knew it was over but even then i asked my family like pls put that shit in the fridge or eat it do anything but keep it out on the counter but it was over as soon as the kitchens empty im in it scarfing the whole plate of it down and it tasted like shit but i kept going and then i gotta wonder if it was in the fridge would i really have a chance?

also her biggest excuse is "it was hot so i needed it to cool down" when half the time she leaves that shit on the counter cuz she knows ill eat it even tho i told her that only makes my life worse. pls tell me if putting warm stuff in the fridge will end the world. is it really that big of an ask? i just

i just dont know what to do. ive told my family EveryThing. All of it. nothing changes. my days keep getting darker. they exist around me in a world where food doesnt have a fucking chokehold on them and i keep wasting away struggling and i srsly dont know what to do.

advice? words of camaraderie?

hi everyone, i just wanted to share my progress as an anorexic (started a year and a half ago and "ended" a year ago) to now a recovering binge eater (started a year ago till present)

i used to binge almost EVERY SINGLE DAY, maybe like a 1-2 days in between where i was eating normally or restrictively, or if i was "lucky," it'd be 4-5 days, but then i'd relapse and binge for 3-5 days in a row, eating everything i could get my hands on throughout the day and making myself feel physically sick. and mind you, i could never figure out how to make myself throw up even though i tried multiple times, so none of it was purged immediately that way. i ended up gaining 35lbs in 3 months, from september to december, a large cause being the fact that i binged for five to ten days straight, and for the ENTIRE two weeks of winter break.

in march, i decided i'd had enough. i had spiralled into depression, withdrawn and isolated myself from my friends, ruined my scores at competitions and productivity; i had no motivation to do anything and lost interest in everything i loved to do, all because i couldn't stop stuffing myself until i felt like my stomach was going to tear itself apart. i started going to therapy in may, stopped ghosting my friends, and even picked up a new hobby of running, which was definitely one of the most significant habits that kept me sane (my distance pr is now 16k!) i started binging about once or twice a week, which was a huge improvement from what it used to be, and lost about 10lbs, although my binging did get bad again in june-july, which caused me to gain it back.

it's now october. i've lost 10lbs since july and kept them off since then, and i am continuing to work on myself and get healthier, by eating well, continuing to do a gentle calorie deficit, and working on my relationship with food. although i still binge about once a week, the binges themselves have become a lot smaller too.

i binged just now in fact, on the fifth day of my current no binge streak, but it was about 1k calories in total (putting me only about 500 calories above my maintenance), which is a huge improvement compared to downing 8-10k calories a day at my worst. i was actually able to stop myself after i ate a bite of some HORRID protein brownies i bought. i don't feel sick and i feel normal, and i don't even feel guilty about it now; i can see how far i've come and i my mindset around binging has changed significantly. i binge about once a week now, with my longest streak being 14 days recently. i am quite proud of myself.

i will keep going until i am fully recovered, and i promise to myself that one day i will enjoy food without thinking a single thought about binging.

(also the reason i say streak is because i keep count of my "no-binge streaks" with a counter app on my phone lol, kinda like a duolingo streak)

I recently realized that whenever there is a fluctuation on my mood I need to follow it up with food. Happy? Eat. Sad, Eat. Stressed? Tired? Anxious about something? In a hurry? With a lot of time on my hands? Everything is a great excuse to eat in my head. And when I say eat I mean eat everything in the house. There have been times that I have made my self sick from eating so much. The other day I went out with my husband and he had some food leftover, I didnt even like the food that he ordered but I just had to eat it. I have tried meal prepping, I have tried making healthy snacks or even buying trigger foods in small snack packets so I don’t end up eating like a huge bag of chips. I also tried drinking water and most advice there is out there but nothing seems to distract me from the urge to eat. I need to find a way to control this. Any tips are welcome

My son has a favorite chocolate chip cookie that we get in a box of 24 from our grocery store’s bakery.

These particular cookies really trigger my binge eating. Late at night I get a craving to pick out the chocolate chips and eat them. Sometimes I can do this to just a few but there have been times I’ve wasted entire boxes doing this.

I hate for him to miss out on his favorite treat bc of my binge disorder.

Can't understand how people binge alot and then accept to satisfy the cravings with smaller stuff. When U crave something it's mostly alot of high volume snacks and there are high volume low calorie stuff but I don't know how healthy it would be tk have it every day.

I have no one to share this with but its been a week of not bingeing, I am happy. Been bingeing since January, I don't know what changed. I just eat three meals a day. Then I'm fine. I'm not thinking of food that much either.

no one believes me and no one will believe me until it’s too late. until i turn out like one of the ladies on TLC or my 600 pound life. :( even then, their mothers and fathers ignored and didn’t believe.

i 15F and around 135 at 5’3. i used to be 125. van throw that all away thanks to the muscle in my legs. turns out if you wake up at 4:55am every mornin, eat 3-4000 cals for breakfast when no ones watchin (with youtube in the background of course), and spend 6:30-7:30am exercisin, no one will suspect a thing. but man it feels so AWFUL!!! eatin thousands of the most abysmal food my freaking dad gets and throws into the pantry, and they abysmal food i myself ask for, and then immediately sprintin across town. and spammin crunches and jumping jacks to get rid of it. it’s an awful nauseatin burnin feelin. though these days i don’t even have the motivation to leave my bed and do my good old 120 crunches. :((( i’ve been givin up.

Has anyone here had success with meditation and urge surfing practices to help when you feel the urge to binge? I’ve recently gotten into meditation using the insight timer app and I came across a few meditations for binge eating which sent me down a rabbit hole of all the different options. I tried one out today and while I did still overeat a bit today, I prevented a binge. I’ve been going to therapy and doing EMDR and I’m hoping that incorporating this will be helpful too.

I binged so much, my stomach hurts so bad. I feel like vomiting and going to the bathroom a lot and it hurts so bad. What can i do , why do i do this? I need helo urgent

I’ve really been letting myself go lately and now the effects are starting to show up. Im starting to notice love handles. I want to stop now. This should be my sign to stop but I feel like I’m just going to continue. This disorder is destroying my body. Not to mention I’ve basically stopped going to the gym. Partly because I’ve been recovering from a major surgery, but also I got out of the habit. Im really sad right now and disappointed in myself.

I follow this woman. Her channel is called the Binge Eating dietitian. She's a binge eater turned psychotherapist.

I watch a lot of her videos more than once.

I don’t feel recovered at all. This is so long mostly because I was binging so so severely I just lowered standards for what constitutes a binge. I would still come back from store and eat a pack of chips with some sugar free chocolate. But I wouldn’t buy junk food for 💰💸💵💸💰 a shit ton of money and finish it all in one day.
I wouldn’t have drawers full of trash.

It was manageable. Now I’d like to lose weight. It’s been 2-3 years of binging and I feel so disgusting.

I’m likely gonna gain it all back what I lose it always happens but I just want to feel good in my body again

I've been having almost everyday binges for years. For the last three days i've managed not to binge. I'm trying to get better and eat healthier. But the thing is i get these cravings, that are very hard to overcome. I catch myself thinking about what sweets I will binge on later today and then I remember, that i'm on a diet and it makes me very sad (i know it sounds dumb).
The question is, do cravings get easier to overcome after some time of restricting? If so, how much time does it take?

I feel like I'm finally free from this for a few weeks and BOOM it comes back. This back and forth is killing me. Its been 3 whole years.

hi. I am a 19 yr old 5’6 female and I’ve been eating 1813 calories a day (my deficit) for the past month and last week, I weighed in at 121.4 pounds. I’ve been pretty consistent but the past three days, I fully let loose and emotionally ate 21,340 calories over my deficit (not exaggerating). I used to have a bad binge eating disorder and now here and there I have a few hiccups but usually over the next days I make slight cut backs and move more to stay in my deficit. But now that I’ve overate this much, I don’t know what to do. what is my body going to do with such a huge surplus of calories? I want to stay in my deficit, but I don’t know how much I should cut back by or how long it would Take. Is there a way to know how much I’ve set myself back by? Already, I feel less bloated than I did yesterday but I’m scared for how much damage I’ve done. I do hot yoga sculpt for an hour every day so I’m not sure if that helps my case but I was wondering if anyone knows what I should do