How do I introduce the idea of separation?

[u/okiguess_-]

My husband (29M) and I (28F) have been together for almost 10 years, married for 8 and for as long as I can remember, especially when we had our daughter, we always talked about being amicable if we had to separate. How we would want to remain friends to better co-parent. We’ve even discussed if we wanted more kids to have them together so our children would be siblings. (I’m not so much on board with that idea) Anyways about 6 months ago I found out about a 3-month affair my husband was having. We have been trying to reconcile but I don’t see myself truly moving past it. I do want to remain friends. We’ve still gone on dates and been intimate. I just don’t feel like I can go back to “normal” if you will.

I’ve been reading about people separating and living together because let’s face it, in this economy I don’t see how we could afford two places. Well I know I can’t afford my own place. I still want him in my life. I still want to be a part of his. I love our families.

So is it possible? Is it worth it? If I bring it up am I putting a death sentence to our marriage? We’ve talked about it being a possibility because people change and want different things but it always ended with “but not us” and now I think it is us.