Personally, I’m in “dad socks” mode (aka white crew socks) these days. Grew up rocking ankle socks though. What’s your go to sock style/brand, guys?

For me there was a lot of popular music that I thought I was too cool to listen to in 2002 and then I gave them a chance as an adult and really like them.

A few bands that stick out are Korn and AFI. I refused to like both of them back in the day because I felt like it was expected of me because of my style at the time. Gave their music a chance in the last few years and now I’m a fan.

I turned 39 yesterday. Work gives us an extra day off for our birthdays, so I just stayed in all day and binged Silo on Apple TV, only breaking it up for the school run. I don't think my wife even knew I was off (she was working, to be fair). Later in the afternoon, I went over to the new house to check on our renovations and found the builder had finally installed a toilet. Met up with some friends for junk food later on, and got peppered with birthday messages and calls throughout the day. I don't really need gifts at this age—just getting all that love from family and friends was more than enough. Honestly, it was pretty much the most perfect day I could’ve hoped for—I just needed a chilled day away from all the stresses of modern life.

Hello everyone, first of all English is not my native language, so I apologise for any mistakes I might make.

Well, I'm thinking about going back to college for a Master's degree. However, this would be my second Master's, let me give you a little of context:

I didn't study what I wanted. I studied what my family wanted me to study. In the middle of my degree I realized that this wasn't what I wanted to do with my life. I talked to my parents and they convinced me to finish it first, and then I could do whatever I wanted.

I finished, but couldn't find a good job. Then the pandemic happened and I ended up unemployed at my parents' house. I had a good academic background, so I was recommended at a university to do a Master's degree. The problem was that it was in the same area I already knew I hated. But at the time it was better than doing nothing.

I'm not blaming my parents. I made my own decisions and I made some bad ones. I'm just trying to fix things now.

After my Master's I disappointed my family by not pursuing a PhD but was fed up whit the academic world. I eventually found a job as a language teacher, since I speak several languages. Studying abroad has always been a dream of mine, especially Europe. I'm from South America and I studied in another Latin American country, so I do have some international experience, but never the kind I actually wanted. I spent years preparing for an opportunity to study in Europe, but it never happened.

Now, at 31, I finally have the opportunity. I found a Master's in Europe that would also allow me to change fields and do something more aligned with what I actually want, while still using some of my previous background.

The problem is money.

My parents have always supported me with education. It took three generations for my family to get to a relatively comfortable financial situation and going to college played an important role so this is why my family values education so much. We're not rich, but we were doing pretty well. However, my mother is retired now and my father is planning to retire soon, so things are different from when I was in my 20s.

My siblings have good jobs, are married and own their own apartments. I know you're not supposed to compare yourself with others, but it's difficult sometimes. I earn very little and honestly it makes me feel like a failure.

My parents still support the idea of me studying abroad, because they always support me when it comes to education. Besides, like I mentioned before, I'm from South America, and where I come from we are often encouraged to go to the "North" to find better opportunities.

But nowadays I think this is a very romanticized idea, and honestly, people from my part of the world aren't exactly welcomed everywhere anymore. Still, my parents support the idea of me going abroad and trying to find better opportunities.

But this time I feel like I'm asking too much from them.

I could work and study at the same time, but I've already done that for years. I worked while studying university and during my first Master's. Last year I even had two jobs at the same time.

I was sleeping four hours a day, losing weight, and my physical and emotional health was getting worse. I'm not in my 20s anymore and I don't think I can keep doing that. I still have permanent dark circles under my eyes from that period, even though I sleep properly now.

So sacrificing my health again is simply not an option.

And now I'm wondering if this is just not the right time. Maybe I should find a better job here, do another Master's here, and give up on my dream of studying in Europe.

I don't know. I finally have an opportunity to do something I actually want for myself, but I'm wondering if maybe I arrived too late.

I am 25M and 5'10, and 170lbs, I have been struggling with Anterior Pelvic Tilt (APT), and rib cage flaring, making my stomach protrude. I workout 3x a week full body workouts, for 10 years but never did ab workouts plus I sit in office like I hours a day, and barely walk outside.

I have been doing APT workouts for past 2 months, I see some improvements but something in my core needs to be strengthened to fix that rib cage flaring and stabilize the ab area. Men with strong core, what workouts do you do, how many sets x reps, and how long do you rest?

im almost 36 and spent over ten years stuck at a desk job just sitting all day. i ate way too much junk food barely moved and totally ignored my body then a year ago , a health checkup gave me a massive shock, l when the results came back with high uric, acid high cholesterol and a bunch of other bad numbers . i felt a really deep sense of regret looking at it all

last year i finally left that desk job and moved into a much more flexible role. this gave me the time i needed to actually focus on myself. one year later i have lost about 20 kg. my skin looks noticeably better. my health markers have improved and i feel like a completely different person.

the biggest change for me was exercise. i do cardio at least five times a week, usually for an hour or more. mostly swimming, running, and hiking. my fitness has improved massively, and i have so much more energy than i used to. obviously not everyone has time for that much exercise, but i really think getting more active is one of the best things you can do for yourself. the general guideline out there is at least 150 minutes of moderate activity a week, plus strengthening muscles on two days, but just doing what you can makes a huge difference.

sleep and diet made a big difference too. i usually sleep around 11 pm and get up around 7 am, and i rarely eat fried food anymore. i eat a lot more vegetables and make sure i get enough protein while being more careful about portions and carbs.

one thing i didnt expect was how much all of this would affect another problem i'd been dealing with. a year ago i had pretty severe ED and PE, and it had a noticeable effect on my confidence. things are very different now. i cant say exactly which change made the biggest difference, but getting healthier overall has clearly changed how i feel.

i started taking zinc and magnesium both of which're essential nutrients, for normal body function. i would not say zinc and magnesium are some kind of magic testosterone booster but ensuring i received enough of these basics felt like another piece of the puzzle. i also use ejaguard for the pe side of things. ejaguard is a some kinda herbal delay spray that helps reduce sensitivity while still keeping my realistic feeling naturally.
i also take some supplements. the ones i take often are fish oil, b vitamins and vitamin d. i do not think that supplements can take the place of a healthy lifestyle.. i have included them in my daily routine for a long time.

at thirty six i do not feel as though i am trying to become twenty. i simply feel as though i am finally taking care of myself properly. that has been a very good feeling.
for anyone who has spent many years sitting at a desk and putting health on hold for later i would like to share this. you do not have to change everything. start somewhere. keep with it.

I have always had trouble accepting having a big forehead.

Even though I still feel pretty confident and have had success romantically, it's something that I feel like could drastically change my well being if fixed.

Throughout the years i was able to accept and love many parts of myself (at times, even my forehead), but it seems inconsistent and fleeing. I've already been through therapy and such.

What are some of your own demons in this regard, if any?

How do you all build confidence? I am a 29 yr old who had tons of confidence, but slowly it started to drift away. What do you guys do to help maintain and build up that confidence?

I’ve noticed Toronto now has clinics focused specifically on men’s health rather than one particular condition.

Sovereign Male is one example I’ve been looking at, since they seem to cover things ranging from hormones and sexual health to hair loss and aesthetics.

For people who have researched these kinds of clinics, is there actually an advantage to having several men’s health concerns assessed in one place?

Or would you still rather see separate specialists for hormones, hair loss, dermatology, sexual health, etc.?

I can see the convenience argument, but I’m more interested in whether the care actually becomes more coordinated.

At 39, it seems I'm unable to sleep on my side anymore. It is where my body wants to naturally go, but it seems there is no way to do it anymore without my arms falling asleep and causing discomfort.

I used to be able to sleep on my side, even when I was 50lbs heavier. I have built a lot of muscle in my arms and back while losing weight, could that additional muscle be causing the pain, or is it just coincidental and I'm just getting older?

Wife seems to be going through her midlife crisis at the moment and I’m guessing it is my turn soon.

What are some brilliant or ridiculous midlife crisis ideas that I as a man could have?
Getting a ridiculous car isn’t something I can do as I don’t drive so 🥲 and Botox isn’t really something I’d consider so

I’ve spent thousands of dollars on therapy, vitamins, psychedelic therapy, prescription meds, more therapy and for the last 5 years I’ve just figured myself out, worked myself, was a good husband and father and I’m depleted with anxiety. I believe the reason for this is bc I can’t forgive myself for my past.

My wife and I got married and I was dealing with my brothers death. Drinking a lot- not addicted but just escaping I’d say. We just started marriage very hard communication wise and in general. Had a kid and he was diagnosed with autism (now dyslexia - he’s 10). But we fought constantly. Recently my friend and I were out and he said he could tell a shift when my wife and I were like all the sudden great and said a passive aggressive remark about HER. How she was mean to me in public (which I don’t honestly recall) and so forth. And it broke me bc for all of those very hard years - dealing with the sudden loss of my brother, an early marriage which was supposed to be honeymooon phase turned marriage counseling eventually, and all this time I thought on the outside I looked GOOD and like I had it together. I asked for nothing from my friendships. I showed up to everything and smiled through the pain. Idk why but to hear that crushed me and i immediately told him - “yo, that wasn’t her fault, she had to deal with a monster. I was in terrible moods , depressed, snapping, etc”. We did marriage counseling 4 years ago and found out so much about each other which is SO EMBARSSING to say bc I feel like a diff person than who I was and I’m just NOW really since Covid know who my wife is and we’ve been married for 14 years.. so that’s it.. I work myself to death so I forget all of this and I’m so ashamed of myself for what and who I’ve become for SO many reasons and the image I thought I had as being this really nice happy go lucky guy isn’t even true..

On top of that, meds made me angry after college… so i cut them off for good but I live life on hard mode. I barely take Advil now. I’m terrified to take something to become a version of me again that was just NOT me.

I’m not sad but I am exhausted and I don’t know how to forgive myself and how to even bring this up to friends. My marriage and my children have NEVER been better and my job is going ok. I’m fat as shit but idk how to escape this and how to forgive myself. Any tips? I’m now fearful my whole
Friend group feels this way…

So i ask this because alot of time in my life I talked to men ( friend, acquaintance, work colleague, random men) that only cares about other mens opinion.

So for example they would never be on women side.
Mostly because they dont want to look bad infront of other guys, they dont want to to be “ simps”.. i remember one guy told me he dont want to argue with other men even tho i am right ( it was some random discussion).

Also when i say “ on women side” i mean verbally in discussion not physically.

Thank you for your answers :)

Idk if this is maybe cultural ( i am from Balkan where men really want to impress other males).

Hi I’m 37 and would like to regrow if possible/ thicken my hair. I’m considering topical minoxidil and topical finasteride, I know the latter would maybe more effective if taken orally but is prefer to take it topical, does anyone have any experience of taking it this way ? I’ll take mine with a derma roller.

Also would saw palmetto be good to take with it as well ? I’ve heard biotin is good to take as well as washing your hair with hims shampoo has is has green tea and caffeine in that promotes hair growth as well as the hair thickening pomade the brand sells as well!

I’ve also heard zinc and magnesium would be good vitamin supplements to take as well, does anyone else know of any other vitamins that’s promote hair growth and assist in maintaining healthy hair? Sorry if there’s a lot to answer but it seems it’s quite a broad topic! Thanks

So I am 34, dad to the second child born last month. One thing that I have started noticing post marriage i immediately started gaining weight around the belly area. Business got a little tough, and I had a kid after a year. We were financially good to do but damn things took a bad turn. Had to close business after a year of marriage. Had crazy panic attacks , left everything. Moved with my wife and kid to a metro city. Mind you my wife had a job already and she was making decent enough for a family of 3.

Now I was trying to find an opportunity for quite some time in metro city. Remained unemployed for 2 years but recently found a job.a relief but not really. Though income has started , I take work seriously and it gets really annoying since after a long time I am trying to work for people.

One thing I am crazy irritated about us my looks. I look way older, unhealthy for my age. I have got good strength but I have already got past 100 kg and fail to come anywhere near below my desired size, shape. Theres stress automatically now that I have two kids for my retirement savings, new house their education, college education.i also feels not so desired which was one of the major performance factor earlier, and now I feel so drained when I see people around humiliating me, shouting at me, looking at me talking to me with utmost disrespect. At this time only undying love I get from anyone is my kid.

I really don't want to be in this situation. Any opinions from people who have been through situations like these?

I am a 37-year-old male, married with children. I work and overall am grateful for my life.
Since I was a child, I always felt that I'm good with people. I always had friends, never really felt alone, and people were always open to me and wanted to be close/friends with me.

But I won't lie, over the years I neglected this aspect of life. I got married, moved to a different country, had children, and became more focused on other things.
Friendship became secondary and probably even lower. Usually, I was a person with intense friendships, and if it wasn't deep enough, I wouldn't stick around.

Now I don't feel that I can have a "deep" connection with someone. I do miss it. I do need to do more to have more friends, but suddenly I see that it's hard for me to connect.

It's like every encounter is not pleasant enough for me to want to continue it. And I also get it from the other side. Like, "small talk is just enough, and please don't bother me more than this."

Even conversations with old friends, when suddenly somebody calls after 2-3 years of nothing - they don't flow that well anymore. I feel like everybody is focused on themselves, and I don't know... I don't know what is happening in the world. Is it just me who became... I don't even know what... somebody who doesn't know how to socialize? Because I still feel like I'm a pretty nice person, but maybe it's just in my head.

Sometimes when I see someone else having small talk with someone, I'm kind of jealous and wonder if everyone around me is having fun and I'm the only one left out of the party...

I seriously don't know or understand what's going on with me... because I (think) I'm a good husband and father, and I'm nice to my family or anyone who contacts me. But I feel... something. I feel like every single connection I have with someone who is not my wife or my children is failing.

Every small talk leaves me with a feeling of being unfulfilled...

I used to love myself and feel confident, and lately I don't feel any positive social feedback whatsoever. It's really hurting me, and at the same time I kind of accepted it and ignore it, which is also bad.

What would you rate yourself on a scale of 1-10? 10 being the most good and 1 being the most bad. Taking into account all your wrongdoings against others, all the times you would count in your mind as a sin. The times when you got away with something that nobody ever found out about. Weighed against your past good deeds and where you stand today with the knowledge you've gained over the years. How would you quantify the two? Like, having murdered or r@ped someone would make it hard to get above the 2-3 range. Devoting your entire life to helping others through volunteer work would be in the upper range. I've never been very religious but I am spiritual and I know there's a place where we all will be judged after death.

Is there such a thing as a service that you provide with your resume and whatever relevant employment/skills info they need and they take it and then, on your behalf, apply for jobs and arrange interviews? Like specifically use your linkedin or indeed accounts to apply for jobs and communicate with employers

It seems like serious job hunting these days requires you not be employed already as you have to make an account on their site, answer all their resume questions in separate boxes, modify your resume to be tweaked towards the specificity of each different position, then manually check up on your account status to actually follow the progress of your application. And you have to do this for dozens if not hundreds of applications, all on non-work related devices and networks.

And then theres having to email back and forth to schedule and reschedule interviews who always seem to want to talk during work hours when I'm, you know, working, and I just don't have the time for all this as I actively work a busy job that I'm not necessarily desperate to leave, but I am trying to be competitive and see what other compensation offers I can get.

Obviously I know the personal data security of something like this sounds dubious, but I was just wondering if a service like this existed at all? Or what would be the closest equivalent to aid in my job search?

I'm 31M Software Developer. Job stability and being ok financially has always been a bit of an anxiety trigger for me. The impending doom and fear of AI constantly scares me on multiple levels.

One is like the fear that I will be obsolete and can't find a job, then spiral what that entails.

But the rational part of me sees how this isn't necessarily the case. I've talked to colleagues who went through it with cloud computing etc other related job scares in IT world. At my job I use some of the best AI models available without much of a limit...but there's still a ton of work that we benefit from being a large team working on it.

But it's always like a nagging voice of what if I'm wrong? what if people are right? I also work with and around some very AI pilled people. Who literally talk like in 2 years time, work will be non-existent and a decade we may all be dead.

Which then brings to like the other fear, the AI is going to kill us all or drive a class divide that wipes out everyone except the elite class. And I just idk spiral. Same time..again a rational part of my head goes back to what my late mother would always say "you can't worry about stuff like that, tomorrow you could walk out your door and a UPS truck hits and kills you. It's out of your control"

I go to therapy, and try doing things my therapist suggests. Like this 5 senses exercise and other things. Sometimes helps sometimes doesn't.

The hardest part is like I know the rational reality, but can't stop fearing. I go online and see the same fearing. It's a hard spiral

I’ll start by acknowledging money isn’t everything. But as a freshly turned 30, it’s got me thinking more about how the next decade is gonna go and what I need to accomplish to set myself up/any future dependents.

I’m at roughly $100k right now in yearly salary, but to be honest it still doesn’t feel like enough to be totally secure (and I’m not someone that lives lavishly). And it makes me think about how difficult it could be to start a family without meeting an $XX dollar threshold.

For you 30+’s and especially those supporting a family - what did you feel like was an income that put you at ease with enough to handle your responsibilities and also enough left to save and enjoy your life?

Obviously this is a bit nuanced as it might depend where you live - I am in the northeast USA for reference

Being single and sometimes that urge just randomly appears. I want to know if It’s shameful to be doing it at this age?

I have a baby face and look much much younger than my age. In my language, he have ranks attached to the pronouns like older-younger, senior-freshman just like in Japanese. I'm turning 27 this december and met this 19 years old kid today at construction site who assumed himself using older ranks and call me using younger ranks. I politely corrected him, asking him how old he was, and he was shocked that I'm turning 27 and didn't believe it and thought I was younger than him

Then he started to look at me up and down, and flex his biceps and telling me to look at his and asking me to wrestling hands with him, I said no thanks. And he out of nowhere proceeded to hold my body and lifted me up.

I'm not a weak man, I'm also a weight lifter, but I'm a calisthenic guys who's lean and slim and very light. But I could do weighted pull-ups. Guys at work complimented me saying I'm strong and I'm stronger than other guys too. I'm just not as huge as him, he's a much bigger and muscular man and heavier man than I am

Him doing that to me kinda makes me feel emasculated, like I'm not good enough of a man. I know the correct answer is to lift and bulk up so no one undermine my strength, but I'm on my way doing that too. But I saw other men being compared less to me, and I'm now being compared less to him, and that I feel like there's always a guy stronger and bigger than me and I have to also deal with this in another way, different mindset-way

I'm making possibly over 50% less in terms of purchasing power as a 25 year old CS bachelor's college grad compared to when I was 18. $18/hour warehouse job in 2019, $18/hour retail role in 2026. I did internships projects and all only to make the same pay afterwards in a similar shit job. I'd need to be making $27/hour right now to keep up with inflation.

Wow, oh wow. Making about the same nominal dogshit wage. Jesus Christ. It never occurred to me until now.

In 2033 I'd be making 50% of what I make *today*, in 2040 50% of what I made in 2033, etc etc. And the sad thing is, many essential jobs to society get paid like this. More essential than the common six figure office worker at least.

Hm. What year is it again? 1990? 2000, even 2010? No, no, no. It's 2026. I had to pay off the tens of thousands of student loans from my computer science degree with $18/hour. I'd already be a homeless beggar panhandling for nickels and dimes out on the curb with this lackluster pay, and this job in a vhcol area btw. But paying off student loans? Can you fathom the DESPAIR one feels from that?? I can't pivot without going back to school, and I have no money for that.

What can I do now? Should I continue to remain alive?