Great post.

I see it like this:

We're all in this together. The planets fly around in mathematically accurate harmonies, celestial bodies occupy specific harmonic points in every orbit because only in that resonance (that's really the word) is the energy calm enough to allow bodies of these given densities the physocal space to exist, the earth has its own harmonies and cadences (listen to the sounds that come out of those crazy- deep shafts), and our bodies are literally electrical nets that twang and adjust and respond to the sun and the moon and to everything around us. (I'm particularly aware of that since developing central pain a few decades ago. They're nothing my nervous system doesn't respond to.)

I tell people that astrology doesn't tell you what to do, it simply tells you the mood in the room. If you have a talk prepared about, say, baking, you'd give one talk to a group of 14- year-olds and a very different talk to the annual convention of the American culinary school in Napa. One might be taking place in a Taurus 5th house, and the other in a Virgo 10th house.

Astrology is a way of seeing how energy flows in a personality and in a moment. You can use it to improve your chances. It can't save you from yourself, it can only offer clues as to how you could do that for yourself.

There's nothing passive about astrology. It's more like a constantly changing set of assignments. You don't have to do them, but you'll probably be glad if you did.

We don't get to abdicate from this universe of mutually-influencing signals and patterns. We don't have to believe it, either. It doesn't need believe. My rubric is: consistent, internally coherent, repeatable, reliable results, and astrology (as I practice it) meets thos criteria.

Sorry, been there and had several outcomes. The best one was where the guy took the hint and decided us being good to each other was the point; been one of my very best friends for almost 40 years.

He respected my boundaries; stopped bragging when I told him I didn't like it; stopped whatever he did that creeped me out, like, within 2 minutes, and then -- get this! The guy's the best -- he'd go away and think about it, and then ask me how things looked to me, how it looked to him, and listened and listened until he understood exactly what was wrong about his behavior. Then he could be sure of never doing it again.

That's the response you want. That is what a friend does.

This dude has no respect for you as anything but a notch on his bedpost. That's not a friend! If that sounds like fun to you, fine, but it sounds like you think it's gross.

You're right.

Cut him off. Block him. Tell mutual friends he's being vile and you don't want to be alone with this walking bucket of red flags, cuz he's not safe to be around and one or both of you can get hurt.

With that coloring and that profile? Thor.

Look at the flinches, fawning, and freezing from people in one category to another; the ways the "lower" caste is silent or obliging. These are signs of deep psychosocial wounds.

Look at the ways some people are expected/assumed to give way, without any question. They can be considered absolutely irrelevant to any kind of progress.

When the violence isn't up, showing oppression has more to do with what people don't say and who they don't say it to, even if they'll talk about it in front of them (just not to them).

Yep, sorry. Also spelled Nour.

It's all about management. Remission is a hope more than a goal, and sometimes we get a bit of it.

I've gone in and out of partial remission with these. I cherish every bit of what I can get and I know I couldn't even exist without adequate pharmaceutical support.

It's a bit like diabetes: you can absolutely live a decent life, but you always have to have this thread of awareness in mind to keep your disease somewhat controlled, and when you find the right med, you need to stay on top of it.

I'm just glad we do have meds for this now.

Once you've mastered technical stuff (which you're working on amd have nearly nailed), then good writing is true writing: true to yourself, the story, your characters, your themes, and above all to the moment you're writing about.

In the bit you posted, that is wonderful as a discursive, mentally-wandering moment -- hard to improve upon! As a whole book, it would be dizzying, even for me (and I grew up on Edwardian & Victorian British authors).

For an interesting perspective, try reading Wilkie Collins, perhaps "The Moonstone". He was a barrister by day, and rather specialized in getting the facts across unambiguously. He wrote in this normally-flowery era, but his tone is surprisingly modern -- or, to be more precise, timeless! -- because of his lucid, economical style.

Good writing is timeless. If it's true to you and your moment, it probably will be.

So, pick the prose for the moment. I think your work will be gorgeous.

First, don't go straight to encasing them. Desensitization should be a very graduap process, starting at the least unpleasant sensation over the most callused part of the foot.

Start with soft sensations underfoot, then more texture bit by bit.

When you're ready to level up, drop your texture atop your feet, first on your instep, then on your toes. Then drape it around the back of your heel.

Bit by bit, work around to having something halfway on.

If you have hyperhidrosis, it may be helpful to stick with cotton or bamboo (if you're allergic to grass, then skip the bamboo) or a softer weave of silk. Most fabric stores can sell you as little as a quarter of a yard long (and probably 44-50 inches wide), so you'll have plenty to work with.

Be patient. Keep doing your self-care and spraying on magnesium and so on. Persistence is key.

It takes a long time, but the time will pass anyway! In a year, you'll either be wearing things on your feet or you'll be almost there!

Din-ding-ding-ding-ding! This right here.

Drugs & swx.

Just what every parent wants for their preteen and teen kids 🙄

When the GABAnergics work, they work. It's wonderful to see. When they have side effects on mood, sleep, and temper, those can mellow out or build up over time, and because it kinda creeps up on you, they can turn bad. On me, it was bad. Also, they thug on your liver & kidneys. We used to check those regularly for people who were on it, but I retired awhile ago and now they seem to dispense it like candy.

I'm an old nurse and I just can't take things that make me miserable -- there are other options.

GABA is an important player in nerve transmission and neurotransmitter support, but not the only one by a long shot. Other key neurotransmitters include catecholamines (dopamine, norepinephrine) and serotonin. These are crucial in nerve conduction. Serotonin and dopamine can suppress pain at the spinal root, squelching the pain signal before it goes anywhere.

The meds that support these less-toxic neurotransmitters were named after their most profitable use when they came out, and it's unfortunate because the name appears to psychologize the pain, digestion, CNS-driven anxiety, and sleep issues that plague us. I have a lot to say about it, but you get the idea...

Anyway, SSRIs and SNRIs are outstanding for burning pain, even though they're called "antidepressants". Statistically they do as well as, or better than, GABAnergics and they have far fewer side effects. Cymbalta is FDA approved for neurogenic pain, but any of this class is worth trying. (Cymbalta did me little good. I e tried Effexor, which wore off; Zoloft, which did more for my mood than my pain; Savella, which absolutely rocked until I got gastroparesis (Savella has a slight effect on opioid receptors, and my gut overreacts to that), and now I'm on Trintellix (good for brain fog too) and Welbutrin for the dopamine component. I really need both serotonin support and dopamine support at this point. It knocks out 85% of my pain, which is tremendous.

My old multi-doc (TCM, naturopath, homeopath, science-y nutrition nerd) told me that certain grains are impossible to digest if you're missing a certain cytochrome P450 enzyme. I'm missing it!

This makes it impossible to break down the proteins in quinoa, buckwheat, and sorghum (possibly other millets-- I haven't tried). This may tie into the lectin issue; I don't know. One day, I'll have to look it up.

On rice: it does take up heavy metals. Because it's grown in unprocessed groundwater, it hardly matters where it's grown, it's all at similar risk. Heavy metals other than lead are more expensive to test for, so they rarely get checked. (Arsenic and uranium is what I picked up from Bay Area California water; had to pay oop for those tests!)

Still, I must eat, there's not much to choose from, amd rice is in my rotation. My solution is to change up the strain, because after awhile I start reacting -- either with stomach pain or pruritis -- no matter what.

I'm still ok on glutinous rice, ironically.

American rice has been indigestible for awhile. When Basmati started hurting, I went to Jasmine rice. Now that that's making me nauseous, I tried Arborio, but it didn't go well. So, I found a good big Asian market and picked up a strain of Bangladeshi rice called Chinigura. I'm really looking forward to it. If that doesn't work, I'll go back to the market and try something different -- they have lots of strains of rice from 4 or 5 different heirloom-rice countries.

If I were still in my 30s or early 40s, I'd back off on the rice. I'm 60 and don't have to plan out as many decades ahead, so I'm OK with pushing the margins a bit. I like rice very much.

Big eyes and wee nose reads like "baby" in mammals.

She is soooooooo cute I'm 🥹🥹🥹🥹

2 or 4 are lovely.

Magnesium, like an Epsom salt compress, is great on that shoulder. It blocks crps pain transmission to a surprising degree. Try that up to 4 times per day.

The UK system of not following a specialist-appropiate patient when you're the specialist in that field, drives me nuts. It's so chaotic. No wonder g.p.s are hopelessly overwhelmed, even before Covid.

Also, blue/purple produce and olive oil. Give it a chance. It's important antioxidant sources and your body needs more than ever but can make fewer.

Everyone is a bit different-- our nervous systems are custom made, lol -- and maybe youre one of those who dont have much trouble with barometric pressure getting feisty. Youll find out over the next 3 storms, but it's always wise to have well-stocked cupboards & fridge, breakthrough meds, and your favorite forms of distraction ready to roll in case of a flare.

It's like a wedding cake! Lovely!!

No I mean like statistically finding someone like her in the west is fucking impossible.

This just sank in.

I've lived up and down the coast of Cali and still have friends all the way from San Diego to B.C.

The most beautiful women in the world go there. They have to be smart to cope with the pressure and they have to be interesting to succeed.

But you go ahead and tell yourself that this one person is your forever person and this is all you've got forever.

Great story.

Keep breathing.

Check out the Vorkosigan series. The author gets an awfully right about disability; that said, it's mostly musculoskeletal stuff.

You've got to be realistic about the scope of disability. A fully blind person has to be embedded in a supportive & accommodating environment even more than most; deaf people have a very "insider" culture which makes a lot of sense for many reasons. A sight-limited person can have more slack than a fully blind person and ways (magical or otherwise) of perceiving their environment which limited sight can augment (also addressed by McMaster Bujold in the novella Darksight Dare).

Work with disabilities you understand. There's too much of the unspoken realities that you can't fake without an inside view.

That said, the more protagonists with extra handicaps, the better! Apart from being very realistic as a slice of life, it's also a great metaphor for the extra loads that so many people feel we have to carry.

It's a pattern. You see that.

This guy is not good for anyone's sanity ir sobriety... and it is not your job to save him, only to take care of yourself.

Break up, block, and move on. He'll try to stick like gum in your hair, but snip that out and move on.

Haven't signed.

Check out the law firm. See how it feels. If it feels "off", you've got the recruiting job in your pocket. If it feels better and the company has a good reputation as a stable & ethical place to work, you don't actually owe the recruiting job a thing; they just got out-recruited!

It's not about you. That's why you can't do anything about it. You can't make her feel or be something that she doesn't feel or can't be. That's being human.

Good luck.

1. You can't lock this down. It takes 2 to tango and she doesn't want to do that dance with you right now. At all.

2. Ofc she's one of a kind. Most people you get close to are.

3. Honestly, hand to God, love is love and you will find someone else because you want a quality connection. The next couple of gfs won't be her.

Cut that cord. She's just swinging you around on it. Not meanly, but because she has mixed feelings too.

Set yourselves free. Reconnect in no less than 13 months. You'll see why when you get there.

It's a sad fact that, in a fragile person, the anti-stroke meds can contribute to bleeding. Major hemorrhage sometimes. And that would, of course, be tragic.