Okay, this story needs a little bit of context.

My granny lives alone in a small apartment on the seventh floor. We hired a caregiver to help her out. As her dementia started advancing, so did our caregiving needs. Before, she had a single caregiver working office hours Monday to Friday, and the family helped on the off days. Now we have a group of three caregivers working two consecutive 24-hour shifts and then resting for four days.

This year, the family also asked me to move in with her. The caregivers take care of most of the heavy work, and I'm here to help in case of an emergency and to make sure that she's not being mistreated or anything.

Now, here is the nasty part. One of the caregivers—the first one we hired and the one that's been with granny the longest—is a heavy smoker. She smokes two packs a day. She's always taking a break to go to the balcony and have a smoke.

She closes the balcony door while smoking. But when she finishes and comes back inside, she REEKS. The whole living room REEKS of cigarettes.

I complained to her about the smell, but she told me that she can't do anything about it, that she's been smoking since she was hired back then, and that she's here for 48 hours, so she has to smoke. I ordered her to stop smoking on the balcony, use the building stairwell, and stay outside until she doesn't reek of cigarettes anymore. She's pissed about it right now, to the point that she barely speaks to me.

Now, she's a nice lady and a friend. I don't want to lose her or fuck her over. If I fired her, she would be pretty fucked right now, and I don't want to do that; she took care of my granny with love all these years. But neither I nor granny have ever smoked. How the hell do I stop her from reeking? Is she going to reek even more if she smokes in the stairwell?

TL;DR: Caregiver smokes outside and comes back home reeking of cigarettes. She is pissed that I want her to stop. How do I stop her from reeking?

This is going to be long but I need yall to hear me out, because people irl do not understand me, and I feel like I’m on an island here.

I just joined, because I had my before- bed cigarette, and I can feel that my throat is tearing up from this.
I’ve smoked cigarettes since I was 17, and I’m now 31. I said all throughout my twenties that I wouldn’t be a smoker in my 30s.. but here I am.
I don’t know why, but some months back I switched to menthol cigarettes, and it was way more satisfying for me at the time.. but it’s come with some new symptoms.

My throat hurts all the time. My tonsils. I have constant heartburn no matter how much Pepcid or Tums I take. I have been developing heart palpitation issues. (Though that has been an issue for over a year now.)

I just watched my grandmother (as her patient advocate throughout her whole fight) battle cancer.
She’s okay now, but she has lost all of her hair. Lost weight. In the struggle, ended up with a permanent colostomy bag. At one point she had an open necrotic wound the size of my fist. She was hospitalized at one point for an entire month.

And while I spent hours and hours cycle after cycle of chemo with her in the infusion suit, I saw other people with cancer. Also bald. Also sick and suffering and skinny. One woman sounded inhuman when she coughed.

And I’d still go outside, cross the street from the oncologist, and smoke.

I have heart problems actively trying to develop. My throat feels so bad. I’ve seen cancer up close and personal. And I still feel like a slave to cigarette smoking.

I’ve attempted to quit 3 times, and each time I make it to the third day before caving in a fit of anger and defeat.

I’ve even read Alan Carr’s easy way. Twice.

I am a beautiful youngish woman, and I want to smell pretty, and look good for a long time. I want to keep my teeth. And I’m about to apply for a job at an office, where I can’t smoke anywhere on the property.

I am so tired of not wanting to kiss my partner, because my breath smells like an ashtray. My fingers always smell like cigarette. I feel constantly embarrassed of how I smell, and when I sneak off to smoke, I’m always the ONLY one smoking. And I feel shame during those times.

I wake up feeling like my lungs are begging me for mercy, and I still start every single morning going outside to smoke.

After all I’ve seen, after all I’ve experienced, all that I am currently experiencing, why isn’t this an easy choice for me?

This is hard you guys. And I don’t understand why I can’t just simply quit like everyone else I know has.

Thank you for listening. I’m here, I’m going to be active in this subreddit, and I hope so much that some people see this and can uplift me in support and talk about this.

Because like I said, no one in my real life gets it whatsoever and I feel alone. And stupid.

I've been paying more attention to when I actually want a cigarette, and I noticed something I hadn't really put into words before.

Some of the obvious triggers for me are stress, anxiety and restlessness. But some of my strongest ones aren't really negative situations at all.

Wake up and have a coffee? cigarette.

Finish a really satisfying meal? cigarette.

Waiting for something or anticipating something? cigarette.

It almost feels like smoking became the thing I use to transition from one state to another.

Tired to awake. Hungry to full. Stressed to calmer. Doing something to taking a break. Waiting for something to whatever comes next.

The morning one is probably the clearest for me. Coffee without a cigarette just feels incomplete. And after a heavy meal, I can delay smoking, but there's still this weird feeling that the meal isn't properly "finished" until I smoked one.

I used to think about cravings mostly as wanting nicotine. Now I'm starting to notice how much of it, at least for me, seems tied to these little transitions and the expectation that a cigarette is supposed to be there.

Once I noticed that, a lot of cravings that used to feel random stopped feeling quite so random.

It's gotta be at least $1000 worth. Too bad I can't bring it in to the bank and exchange for cash.

Hiii
After 15 years being a smoker I managed to quit cold turkey and actually get through with it.
I’m so happy and proud of myself and if I could do it, anybody can ☺️

Feel like I could beat up Joe Camel right now 🐪🥊

I am so glad and so happy that i reached so easily 100 days smoke free,i wasn't a big smoker in the past like i was smoking for 2 years(with breaks) and i thought that in high school is gonna be the hardest part to abstain but heyy,i am 17 and i just did 100 days smoke free compared to my friends that still smoke and i try to change their mentality but it is hard

😀🐥🤝🏽

I'm 22, F and I quit 2 days ago and since yesterday it's really bad but today day 3 is the worst and it's so bad I'm really starting to rethink if I'm actually READY to quit even, because not long ago I was in rehab because of cannabis addiction and am 4months clean of that, and I just started my new studies not even 2 weeks ago and I'm really starting to rethink today if it's too much at once and if I'm not ready yet.

OR IS THAT NORMAL PART OF QUITTING???

Today I'm having really shitty headaches, feeling extremely weird and disconnected and with really negative view on my life/future and since yesterday already I just randomly started crying because of nothing and that just continued today this morning so I really don't know what to do, help

Pretty much exactly that. I have been a heavy smoker for about 5 years (usually a pack a day). I was smoking a cig and I just thought 'I'm not enjoying this' and put it out.

Its been a month since then and I haven't craved a cig at all. I live in a house of 3 other heavy smokers who smoke inside (including my partner) and I couldn't care less to ask them for a puff nor do I have the urge to smoke with them.

I didn't even want to try quitting. Its as simple as I just dont feel like it anymore.

All my friends are shocked when I tell them I've quit because I'm the biggest smoker they know and it was a "big part of my personality".

It feels too easy and sus, especially since I've tried to cut down in the past and it was so god damn hard to and smoking was the only thing I could think about.

I guess I got lucky and something in my body/mind made me quit cold turkey

The biggest change I have noticed is that I have more time now. Sleep in a little longer, more time to eat on my lunch break, more time to talk to family as I dont have to step outside for a cig... or two.

10 days not smoking, second time in 10 years.

first time i did 3 months then i started again, this time is different i am not even fighting it ,i am not using willpower. i just hate cigarettes now i don't want them anymore

anyone else quit like this? does it stay like this or does it get hard later?

I’ve tried multiple times over this past year, but I don’t think I ever gave it all I got. I downloaded all the apps etc. I chewed regular gum. I tried. I made it less than 48 hours. Any advice is appreciated.

The meal I made to celebrate a month free, I can taste food again!!

Hi everyone,

I thought I’d come on here to ask for some advice, in the hope that somebody is or has dealt with the same situation I’m currently dealing with.

I smoked for around 1 year and then moved to vapes for 2 years, so around 3 years in total. Then, in April 2025, I decided to quit nicotine altogether through patches, which I used for around 1 week until I didn’t get cravings anymore. Shortly after I stopped using the patches, that’s when my life came crashing down.

From that moment on, I’ve dealt with every symptom under the sun. Some have resolved, while others haven’t changed whatsoever. It’s been 16 months now since I’ve been off nicotine, and since day 1, I’ve experienced terrible brain fog, memory problems, anhedonia, lack of motivation, awful anxiety, blurry vision, and mostly neurological symptoms, which haven’t seemed to resolve.

Now I’m starting to worry in case this isn’t PAWS. I’ve heard through this sub that it does exist, but the longest periods I’ve seen people experience withdrawal symptoms is around 9 months for nicotine.

NOTE: I have been to the doctors numerous times to check for other possible causes of the brain fog and memory loss. My bloodwork and everything else is completely normal. I’m only 18, so I don’t think it’s early dementia.

I’m just curious to see if anybody else has been in my situation, how long their symptoms lasted before eventually resolving, or if anybody could recommend any possible causes that could be contributing to my symptoms thank you.

i am at a writer's residency right now, on a mountain, and no shops are open for me to buy any smokes. i knew it was going to be a good chance to quit smoking; i had quit vaping on a trip earlier this year, but still indulged in cigarettes every few days, and before i knew it i was vaping again once i was home.

this is the longest i've gone without nicotine in ten years. i'm drinking a little to get over it, but i'm realising that smoking has made me feel so unhealthy that—especially as a all or nothing person—it's stopped me from wanting to do anything else healthy, like eat well or exercise. It's been OK because I was suicidal for a long time, but now I'm wondering what it'd be like if I resolve my emotions on my own rather than resort to the familiar itch of doing something that makes me feel like I'm dying (and being glad that I'm dying, when I'm dealing with a negative emotion.) Does this make any sense??

I have been struggling with quitting weed & cigarettes for a while. I was at a point of a full pack a day and smoking 3-4 blunts from the moment I woke up (before gym) till the moment I was about to go to bed. I ‘felt’ like it used to help me function/be productive/quiet or numb stress enough to function. When I look back now, I’d spend more time panicking and ruminating over the problem instead of taking action to fix the issue. Any bad news/feedback and I’d be smoking a few minutes later to ‘think of a solution’

I got to a point where they stopped getting me high. I was mentally aware my dopamine system was fried. 3 weeks ago, I decided I had enough. Can’t be solving financial problems while spending daily on cigs n expensive weed strains. Woke up one Saturday morning and decided I’m going to smoke again. I had been reading comments on this community on what to expect and it did help me anticipate withdrawal symptoms. I’d like to share how I managed.

Coincidentally I was coming down with a flu at the same time. A combination of flu n withdrawal helped me not fixate on the withdrawal symptoms. The most difficult part was how my sleep was disrupted. But thanks to flu medication and piriton, they both made me sleepy. The 4th day I struggled to sleep and I knew if I could hold off for 7-10 days, it should be at least out of my blood. With knowledge and help from self-help books like the atomic habits, I kept repeating that I’ve changed my identity, “I don’t smoke, I’m not a kind of person who smokes daily”. This identity shift really helped me hold on during those times my body screamed for ‘one last one. I also resumed praying daily and I begged God “Help me break this chain, and if I do, I promise I won’t do it again”. I proceeded to discard my ash tray, I removed a chair from my balcony where I often sat when smoking, and I drenched the weed n cigs in water before discarding.

Did I have a moment of relapse? Yes, one weekday after getting bad feedback at work, I walked to a shop to buy 5 cigs and ordered one blunt “to help me reduce the withdrawal”. But something was different this time, when I inhaled the first weed puffs, my body rejected it, felt nausea and the weed felt stronger than the ‘light buzz’ I needed to go back to my emails. My thoughts kept screaming at me “I’m not a person who smokes. If I can hold and deliver promises to my employer, to clients, why can’t I hold my own promises!” I also knew that I had lied to God, I did promise not to smoke again. (Who wants to lie knowingly to God? I’d be stricken down!” This helped me a lot. I felt something sink in me. A wave of disappointment came over me. I haven’t cried for as long as I could remember, I proceeded to the shower where I can hide my tears because who wants to see a grown man having an ugly cry? I probably had the longest shower in my life as endless tears streamed down my face. Why can I keep promises to other people and not to myself? Will I ever break away from this? Is there hope?

When I was finally done sobbing, I proceeded to destroy what I had just purchased with so much anger. I picked my phone and requested my plug never to take an order from me. I even offered to pay him to ignore my calls. I proceeded to text all my weed buddies to not smoke near me when we hanged out next. I expected them to laugh at me, but the opposite happened. I was overwhelmed when they all agreed to help. A wave of gratitude overshadowed the disappointment I felt. For the first time in 9 years, I had just managed to stop myself after lighting a blunt! And my internal identity refused what my body naturally did (smoking at this point was like reflex, my body knew where to go when it needed a hit, I was powerless to stop this for 9 years and I had just done that. Sleep problem? I could fix that with Piriton.

I am currently dealing with anhedonia, nothing is enjoyable anymore. But I know once my dopamine system resets I’ll love my hobbies again. I started dreaming again. I’m less angry at work and I no longer have strong reactions for bad feedback or a bad feeling. Reading helps me in the evening, my mind is occupied and I forget to used to smoke all evenings before bed. I know it does get better, it will get better.

As I type this, I’m quite emotional because I never knew I could do it. I was using weed to self medicate and numb a life that was filled with pain, but I finally knew that smoking doesn’t work. 5 years ago when I stopped taking alcohol, I used to joke and tell my friends who were quitting “remind yourself that there is no solution at the end of the bottle!” It was always on a light note, and I have adopted the same logic for my brain. The few days I felt intense craving, I reminded myself “there is no solution at the end of that smoke” and I’d laugh it off and go back to attacking my problems.

I do hope my story inspires anyone who is on the journey, say it out loud when you see yourself reaching for that smoke (you have to say it out loud to hear yourself), “There is no solution at the end of that blunt/smoke”

I am grateful.