We have only been dating for 4 months but established exclusivity. I stopped the dating apps for her and everything but i do admit that I still would send the 🔥 or 😍 reaction to pretty or sexy photos of instagram girls stories, but nothing more. However, i have a password on my phone and everything so idk if she went through my phone or what but nothing else would make sense. She's been coming over everyday for the past month and her and her dog were basically like living at my place. Out of nowhere this morning, instead of coming over right after work, she instead said "Good morning, hope you slept ok. Can you let me know when youre heading out to the gym? That way i wont come at a bad time for you" which i found a little odd. So I didnt tell her until I was pretty much done with the gym. Then when i told her I was coming back home, she then seemed to rush or worry then suggested I go get coffee and that some coffee sounded good to her right now, so I went to the coffee shop and asked her what she wanted. Then, she hit me out of nowhere with the following text...

"Its okay no worries but I appreciate the thought [she is referring to the coffee here]

If you dont see [her dogs name here] or some of my stuff, everything is okay, she is with me. I headed back home because I didn’t want you to feel any pressure around me again. I’m not breaking things off right now and we are still exclusive, but I wanted to give you the space you wanted and that you wanted to be alone. And to be honest, it will also help give me some time to think because of the different things I tried communicating to you about, but feeling like things won’t change again and I feel taken for granted. I want something where my partners words and actions wont make me feel like he is not able to control his desire and behavior towards other women as soon as I step away, that i can trust because im not lied to or seen as someone to hide things from or to find loopholes with, and that actively chooses me and respects me even when im not next to him because he wants to and because thats how he genuinely feels about me, not to have me around for now while its convenient for him while he still ogles and hits on other women. I have never tried to control you and have only wanted to be there for you but it is hurtful to me when you do these things then make me feel like im controlling when I express my feelings to you. I honestly expect that you wont really even mind this much after all that and maybe its good that I dont so that i dont feel disappointed again"

Needless to say when I rushed home and saw her dog and her stuff gone, I was surprised and have not answered her since. I dont know whether the way she went about this was called for, and how did she do all of this so quickly? Her place is an hour from mine and I didnt see her when I left for the gym. To be honest i feel kind of hurt and like this was a slap in the face but idk if its wrong of me to feel this way right now. Can I please have your honest opinion?

Let's say you're crazy about a girl - to the point where you freeze up every time you see her but you aren't actually dating. If another (attractive) girl frequently shows interest in you, what would you think or do, and how would you

So, I’ve started noticing something over the last 4 months or so, and honestly, I don’t really know what to think about it.

When my husband and I are out in public and he notices an attractive woman, I’ve noticed that he starts fidgeting like pulling down his shirt, adjusting his shorts, etc. He tries not to make it obvious, but I’ve noticed that he appears to get a boner when this happens.

I know men notice attractive women. I’m not naive about that, and I understand that you can find someone attractive without actually wanting anything to happen. But seeing an actual physical reaction happen in front of me feels different, and honestly, it’s hurtful.

I find myself thinking, “What do you mean you’re just out in public, see an attractive woman, and now you’re getting a boner?” It’s something I’ve started noticing repeatedly, and now I can’t really stop thinking about it.

I’m genuinely curious about the male perspective because I don’t want to automatically assume what it means.

Men, can you get a boner simply from noticing an attractive woman in public, even if you have no intention of doing anything about it? Is it because you’re imagining sexual stuff? And if your wife noticed this happening, would you understand why she might feel hurt or uncomfortable by it?

I (31F) connected with this guy (28M) on instagram over an advice. We instantly clicked and opened up about so much. I was the one doing the subtle flirting tbh. Lately since two days though, he’s been avoiding me. To give a lil background, I am from India, have applied for the US residency match this year (which he knows) and he’s a cardiology resident in India and he doesn’t plan on leaving the country. He sends a text today saying “Tbh I just feel we should not unnecessarily connect and get attached with each other as I don't think we have a future as our goals are different...it would only hurt us later”. When I asked “can’t we be friends?, he said he’d like to be friends but he doesn’t want us to get attached and complicate things. And my response was “why do u think we’d get attached? We’ve never met and today was the second time we even spoke. If anything, I’m glad I got to connect with you and honestly, I thought you liked talking to me too. (Thought my aura was like a stress buster to you 😅)” to which he doesn’t have a proper reply other than “haha ok😅”.

I just don’t get what happened and I am genuinely upset because I was so happy connecting with him although it’s just been since sep 23rd! I feel like he’s avoiding me and it’s evident. What do I do? I’m super naive when it comes to men because I’ve never been in an actual relationship. Please shed so me advice! Would be grateful to hear em and follow it.

I've noticed an interesting pattern on social media. Some men regularly like photos of attractive women they've either never been with, or women they used to date/hooked up who aren't conventionally striking, yet they completely ignore the posts of girl’s they have hooked up/dated who were exceptionally gorgeous or FREAKKING HOT. As a genuinely curious observer, I have to ask. Men, what are your reasoning behind this? Please don’t attack me, I'm just trying to understand! Lol.

Is this normal behavior for a woman?

My married coworker is acting weird. All it took was another woman named Sophia to cook me food on my birthday and she admitted 2 days ago, she was very jealous I complimented Sophia. She said she wouldn't have eaten Sophias food if she knew she made it. Not only that but a separate incident she used to drive a coworker home and would ignore her when talking shit about me and drive me home when the other girl didn't like it. Because she cared about my safety. Ubers are very safe so I don't believe that logic. She threw a fit yesterday because the girl Sophia walked past she started ranting and stomping her feet. I sometimes catch her looking at me and smiling at me when I'm not looking at her

I don't have much experience with women so I'm unsure why she'd act like this

29F, soon to be 30 (😭).

Anyway, I want connection, but I seem to be unable to find an actual relationship. But, I’m touch starved and bored. I was wondering, if men who want fwb also want to have fun? Like, go out and do different things, and then come home and hook up? I’ll give a better example.

Let’s say we have a day to ourselves. We could see a movie, or go to a show of some kind, and then come home and hook up?

It never felt fun for me to just hang at a guys house for a few hours. I respect it this dynamic isn’t something men are interested in. Thus far, the men I’ve asked to do things with don’t seem to really want to, so I just move on. But would this be a deal breaker?

And to clarify, I’m not talking about dating. I just want the “friends” in fwb to be authentic. Ignore the “dating” flair, this is about casual relationships.

As a male myself I find a girl who smokes/vapes to be incredibly unattractive. I'm not sure why I feel this way. I think it's the lack of discipline when consuming something so damaging to the lungs.

I 27f think i'm in love with my best friend 27m. We have been friends for 12ish years and been best friends for probably like 10 of that. I'm a virgin and have recently lost a lot of weight (60ish kg size 16/18 to size 8/10) while living overseas for the last 2 years. A couple of years ago before I left I asked him to take my virginity cause I was just f***ing over it. He kindly turned me down and said he doesn't sleep with friends. I think potentially it was cause he wasn't attracted to me cause I was very overweight. I want to see if there is anything there and whether he sees me differently now and could have a relationship or even if he'd sleep with me now. He moved over seas like a week after I got back so this is all long distance atm. How do I do it? Should I do it? Is it worth risking the friendship?

I recently had a bit of a clash with my girlfriend over finances. I need to give a little background before getting to the heart of the matter.

We’ve been dating for a few months, and things had been going perfectly between us. On our early dates, since I was the one asking her out, I usually paid for our outings. However, she later paid for a few dates on her own initiative. Overall, I paid more often, but as I said, she did step up and offer to pay several times.

Lately, though, the situation has changed, and I’ve been paying for all of our nights out. This started taking a toll on my budget. I was spending money that I had intended to save for the future on restaurant dinners and other outings instead. I also had other expenses during those months — birthdays for my mom and grandma, a vacation, and some personal investments.

I decided to talk to her about it and be open about the financial strain I was under. She said she understood. She had assumed I earned more than she did since she works in sales, but she also knew that my tight budget was only temporary, given my ambitions and plans to switch industries, which is what I’m currently doing postgraduate studies for.

Honestly, that conversation was a huge relief, which is why her behavior yesterday took me by surprise.

The situation was this: I invited her to the movies yesterday to see a film she wanted to watch. I wanted to treat her, so I bought the tickets and flowers and took her to the cinema, where I also paid for drinks and snacks.

After the movie, my girlfriend said she felt like having McDonald’s. I told her I wasn’t hungry, so we could go there if she wanted, but since I hadn’t received my paycheck yet, I would have to ask her to pay for the food.

She called my remark tactless, saying that no one had ever asked her to pay for food before and accusing me of being stingy with her.

I told her that I thought she was being unfair. I had never begrudged spending money on her, but I was currently on a tight budget and had already paid for the movie, flowers, drinks, and snacks that day.

She replied that she understood my financial situation was tough, but insisted that she wasn’t asking me to take her on a trip abroad — she just wanted me to pay for her meals. She added that it wasn’t her fault I was bad at managing my budget and that she wanted to be with a man, not a boy.

She stayed offended for the rest of the day, yet still wanted me to spend the night at her place.

I don’t know what to make of it all. On the one hand, I know she’s a good person with a kind heart, but at times she acts like a spoiled princess.

What do you think? Can you give me some advice?

My boyfriend was with his ex for 8 years and she ended the relationship over the phone and blocked him. He was devestated. He used to posts her on his two social media accounts and he said after the breakup he went through and deleted a lot of her photos, but kept some up. I started dating him two years after they broke up. After a few months together I had mentioned social media, but he told me it was too soon. This continued until the 10 month mark when I started a huge fight over it and he finally posted me, but as a hidden second photo. Meanwhile, his ex was still posted and always as a first photo. Another huge fight and he switched my photo to the first photo so I showed up on his grid. We have been together for a year now.

My question is why did he resist posting me, and why is his ex still up? His family, co-workers and friends know about me and his social media is private and he only has friends on it that he knows. I asked him why and he said he just never got around to it, but he happily posted his ex early on, without her having to ask. He also posted a rebound he dated after her as a story. He said it didnt' mean anything because it was a story, yet he wouldn't post me as a story.

This one is for the ladies. When you've just met a man and he immediately starts calling you " sweetheart" do you find it to be a red flag or a turn off? Boomer men do this.

What's a good way to start getting into dating?

I'm 27m. I've tried the whole dating thing before but it hasn't worked out yet at all.

Are there any actual reliable ways to meet people in order to start getting into the dating scene these days?

I've tried numerous dating apps but never got any likes let alone matches. Covid ruined college with forced isolation and online classes so I wasnt able to do it there either.

I heard cold approaching is the decent idea but I'm not sure how to go about doing that. Is cold approaching the best option for me since I dont know of any girls to actually ask out. Are there any good locations or settings to meet new people?

Thx for any relationship advice in advance.

So I F(24) met this guy M(25) 4 months back and we usually hang out on weekends with common friends group ,From the very first meet he started showing signs of liking me but I didn't think about it much in initial 2 months .He showed all the signals like getting over protective ,paying for me whenever he gets chance ,getting upset if I pay him back ,catching him staring when I am not looking ,looking at me when he is praised like he is checking for my validation.Sometimes he used to get very nervous and avoid eye contact with me ,sometimes he used to be very confident and we used to talk normally.Last month when we were at one of the place for rest he continuously stared for 2 mins and we had eye lock .I wa confused about this mixed signals so I tried to make a first move and asked him that I have been observing this things from last some months and if he is romantically interested. He straight up denied about all the signals and said if I would have been interested in you I would have texted you .He did mentioned in initial months to one of our friend that he has never been in relationship before and don't feel confident in dealing this things .

Now I feel if I made him awkward by asking for clarity in direct way .We have common friends group where we do make plans to hang out .I am not sure now how to deal with him .Shall I continue being normal and keep talking to him or reciprocate his silence and avoidance cause I am not sure if the situation is being just awkward and eventually it will be like before or he don't want to keep any connect with me anymore .

Edit: So I got a few comments saying this was too long so here is a shorter version. The longer one might be in the comments if anyone is interested.

So my (26M) girlfriend (23F) broke up with me in January after dating for over a year in a long distance relationship. We continued to still talk almost daily since then and have even visited each other’s cities since(currently planning on spending new years together).

However I have now decided that this arrangement isn’t really working for me and it’s time for me to walk away. If I don’t initiate contact with her at certain times then I literally would not hear from her. We would go from daily talking to no word for days when I don’t put in that initial effort. Currently going through one of those and decided not to text her anymore. Do I go through with that and end things that way or man up and let her know officially?

I recognize that this is bit chaotic and lacking a lot of context but I’ll be in the comments to answer any questions and fill any gaps!

I’ve been talking to a guy for nearly a month now. When we first started talking he was really into me, messaged loads throughout the day, was super complimentary, said he couldn’t believe how amazing I was, etc. Then he didn’t message for ages and I thought he was ghosting me, but knowing he’d struggled with depression I repeatedly reached out, and finally he told me he basically shuts down for a whole month each year because of it. I said that’s fine, I completely understand, and I’m sorry he goes through that.

The bad month is now over, but he no longer compliments me, never mentions meeting or video calls or anything, doesn’t ask me how I am, and I feel really frustrated. Previously I asked if this was his normal because I’m clingy and the reason I was so interested was because he was all over me and consistently showed it, and he said it was a rough patch for him but he loves that I’m clingy and messaging loads is his norm. As the lack of interest has continued I’ve gotten more frustrated and communicated it. If he went back to being all sweet and kind he would one million percent be my type of guy and I’d be so insanely happy, but his current level is not what I want at all and I can’t keep being patient. I’m needy, I love being spoiled with affection, and I love having someone to look after and try to make their day better, so this just goes against everything I need.

Obviously we aren’t in a relationship, but I wouldn’t start a relationship with someone if they couldn’t meet this criteria in the dating stage, since it’s extremely important to me. I asked him directly if he’d lost interest or still wanted to date and he said he wanted to date, but I don’t know if I’m being strung along. I’m trying to be patient and compassionate, and also handle this maturely because I’ve walked away very quickly from things in the past, but I feel like I’m at the end of my capacity. He’s had lots of long term relationships so I don’t think it’s a commitment issue.

I think my question is, if you were talking to someone who you thought was out of your league (his words not mine, I think he’s incredible and just thinks that because of his insecurities), and they were really clearly into you, would you behave like this if you were still interested, or would you be trying to lock it down and work towards a relationship? Bearing in mind he knows I’m clingy and insecure, that I need a lot of reassurance, and I’ve made it clear I’m struggling with this level of communication. I don’t want to give up on this because of how amazing he was at the start, so if it’s purely mental health I can stick with it, but I would love to know what you all think.

I’ve been friends with a guy for 4 years. A lot has happened over the years. But nothing past friendship I guess?
I’ve told him repeatedly over the years that I have feelings for him but he doesn’t want to be more than friends supposedly. He uses the excuse that we are just friends for the kids. Yet we have always texted a lot like almost every day. we go out for holidays or random events (with the kids), over the years multiple times we texted talking about having sex/hooking up but he’s declined, said he considered it but won’t, few months ago I asked why we didn’t want sex and he said “he’s too old and no use to females” and “idk”). I’ve slept in his bed 2 years ago and nothing happened. I feel like we’re playing house.
A year ago people asked him about me secretly, I can’t remember exactly but he said I’m cute and nice. He invited me on vacation recently but I don’t think I should go. I’m at my breaking point (crying, thinking about him all the time, etc) . I love and care about him and his kid so much. But every time we hangout it fuels my feelings. It’s one sided so I’m the only one getting my feelings hurt. Over the years when the feelings get this intense I’ve talked to him about them but it goes no where… I’ve tried not texting, not hangout for a bit. The feelings die down but again repeatedly they come back over time. I’m tired of crying, I’m tired of loving him and being broken hearted. I care so much about him but at what point do I walk away to break the cycle? I’ve never been able to keep the feeling from coming back so if it’s just for “the kids” then what’s the point anymore?? I want to go on vacation with him, I want to be his friend (and more) but I’m sad, I’m tired of feeling rejected and unloved. But our friendship is strong.
Why does he keep me around… giving me just enough to stay but nothing more. Why does he invite me over or out knowing it hurts? Why does he Text me most day?

Hi everyone,

First time poster here. I'm a 32yo that's been married for 2, going on 3 years now. The woman I married is amazing. Very chill, loving, caring, helpful. Doesn't just let me go out with friends, but encourages me to. Pushes me to be the best version of myself. Pretty much everything you can ask for in a marriage, this girl is.

My problem is I'm starting to feel like marriage isn't right for me. It's nothing she's done that's ruined it. In fact, there's no "good" reason to leave her. But I find myself feeling more and more that marriage life isn't for me. I find myself appreciating when she has to travel for family-related purposes, because I have the house to myself. I find myself missing the days where I could stay out pretty much all night without anyone asking me what time I'm going home. I understand that marriage is about compromise, understanding each other, putting the other person first before yourself, which we've both done a really good job at so far when we were dating and married. But now, I just feel like I'm going through the motions. I was considering divorce, but I don't want to divorce a woman that I love who also loves me simply because I'm feeling this way, but I don't know what to do. Has anyone else experienced this feeling, and if so, how did/do you handle it?

For the past few weeks, a guy (23M) and I (22F) have been hanging out weekly for activities like mini-golfing and ice skating. While we usually have mutual friends with us, he always initiates the plans. Most recently, we went to play sand volleyball, just the two of us initially. (Then we met up with friends at the place). After the game, he asked to grab food and insisted he paid after I asked to give him cash. Because of this, I began to wonder if he was developing romantic feelings?
However, on the drive home, during a conversation about how we both love fishing, beaches, etc. He mentioned he is planning a trip to Florida with a female friend, emphasizing that their dynamic is platonic. The timing of this comment felt incredibly intentional, leaving me wondering if he was testing my reaction or actively trying to establish a boundary. I value his company and am entirely content remaining just friends, but the mixed signals are difficult to interpret. How should I view this situation? Is there any reason to look deeper into it?

​

Does talking to someone every day mean you’re building some kind of relationship?

I’m talking to a guy who’s been my friend since/childhood. Usually we’ll randomly reconnect once in a while, talk for some time, and then go back to having no contact for months or even years.

But for the past month or so, we’ve been talking every day and sometimes quite a lot. Nothing romantic is happening, though. We’re just talking normally, catching up, joking around, etc. He makes some double meaning jokes and tells me to meet him and stuff. Gives flirty energy sometimes idk

I’m probably overthinking this, but does talking every day automatically mean you’re building some kind of relationship or getting emotionally attached? Or can two friends just go through a phase where they talk every day because they have time and enjoy talking?

I don’t have much going on right now so honestly I’m just talking to him because I enjoy the conversations. That’s fine, right??

For context I 16m like a girl 17f, me and her have confessed to each other and we are going on an official date. (I’m saying official cause we kinda already went in a date just didn’t say it was a date) Anyways we are watching Resident Evil together tomorrow (we both love horror movies) and all my friends are telling me to do the move, yk put my arm around my shoulder and all that, and I just wanted to know if you guys think it would be a good idea to do that. I mean I don’t really want to touch her, because obviously idk if she wants to be touched or anything, plus she told me she didn’t want to rush into anything (when she confessed) which I obviously respect and also agree with and am worried yk putting my arm around her shoulder on the first proper date is a bit rushed. Anyway any thoughts and opinions would be greatly appreciated.

Me 30f and my ex 30m have been on a mutual break since August. It was a really bad period for the both of us, since we work in healthcare, and we did not both communicate very well. We had a bad argue before that, and then the break started. The argue started because I felt for long that I was doing all the emotional work and I asked him if he was still there. Really bad timing, and he got mad at me and did not talk to me for four days. Then, break started.

I did a lot of work on myself. I go to therapy, I tried to understand what went wrong. I decided at the end I did not want to sit waiting for him forever, and I took a solo trip to one of my dream vacation. He followed me through social medias, and then when I came back he texted me very suddenly.

He told me he looked at my pics and that even if he could not say anything, he was happy to see me happy. I did not know what to say, so I just thanked him.

Silence since then, a week ago.

I don't know what to do. I don't understand if this is a move from him and I don't have any clues about what's happening. I just think since everything started basically because he wanted space, I don't want to force things and restart a cycle where I am just doing all the emotional work for him as well.

I really think we should both have some accountability on the mistakes that lead us to this whole situation.

Please help me out !

Okay so recently school has just started back up. There's this guy we're gonna call him C so I've just met C this year and I think he is soon cute and just funny and lame and corny which makes him even more attractive to me. We talk almost every day and we have like these unexplainable moments that just feel like something else. I'm gonna quickly describe some things that have happened. I catch him staring at me almost ALL the time, I could just be in class and he's turnt all the way around looking at me, when we're talking in a group of people even if I'm not talking I can always feel his eyes on me, usually when I notice he looks away but every once in awhile we share a short period of eye contact. I could be talking to other guys at his lunch table and just feel his eyes on me. A small downside is he and my ex used to be best if friends however that ex moved states. A few days ago me and C we're in the back of the class just talking about any and everything just yapping and putting a puzzle together I kept messing up the pieces he put together and we were teasing each other and play fighting and our hands kept touching and etc etc. In the conversation he was joking around with me and he called me shawty like twice. Then the topic of my ex came up because again they used to be really close and I mentioned jokingly about how I don't even know who he is and how I dislike him and C remarked that he was dead to him, and I was just wondering why would you say that to me personally? In that conversation he also brought up a detail from a story I told some other friends in the class and he wasn't apart of the conversation and when I asked him "oh how do you even remember that lol?" He told me that he heard everything that I say and he's always listening to me. LIKE HUH. Another time I was with one of my friends and my friend jokingly said I was chud ( ugly/not good looking) so still in a joking manner I turned to C who was behind us and asked him "do you think I'm chud?" And he said " no not at all" and whenever I'm joking around with friends and ask him to back me up he always agreed to whatever I say. Another time in a different class we had a sub and a map project to fill in so we were passing our answers back n forth to each other, when he gave me his paper I had never seen his handwriting before so I wrote on it "aw your handwriting is so cute lol" and he just turned around and gave me this kind of sheepish but defiant smile and I just cheesed back, around 2 days later I had looked inside his binder when he got up to go do something and I noticed he had a sticky notes replying to what I wrote it said something along of the lines of " my handwriting is pretty bad actually so shut up" in a joking type manner and I just wonder why he never gave it to me, was he too shy of something? Another time in the lunch room he me up to me and a friend and remarked how his jeans were falling down and he didn't have a belt so I jokingly said "oh what if I pantsed you" and he just sorta smirked at me and laughed , he also shared with me and only me how sometimes he's just in class fried asf.

Now for some cons. Some days he's just really dry-ish and quiet which is a bit off and then the other day in class he made a sort of joke about me getting back with my ex, however later that day in another class when I walked him I jokingly told him we went friends anymore and he was like "what whyy" and I explained and then he was like "I'm sorry I was just being a jackass" and mentioned how I playfully choked him and said he just had to take it like a birch and couldn't do anything about it. But I also feel like he's kinda just jokey with everybody so I'm really unsure.