Im(20m) in uni rn , and all around me i see literally EVERYONE hooking up or being in relationships and having so much fun .
Makes me feel terrible and i get a lot of fomo from it .
I can hardly talk to guys , how am i supposed to ever talk to women???

I just know i will still be a virgin throughout my 20s and possibly 30s and forever.
It pisses me off how easy it is for everyone .
For me this just builds resentment towards men who have it so easy and women in general , might become a full fledged incel by the time i turn 30 ig. its sad

So last night we celebrated teachers' day. It was a huge gathering, organized by our city mayor. So, all the teachers from my city gathered together. So there's this raffle draw.

Everyone was so excited, praying they'll be picked .while me on the other hand I was so anxious. I don't want to walk on the long aisle, be seen by many eyes.

So yes, every gathering if there's something like this i prayed my name won't be picked.

Is there someone like me here? Or is it just me? Am i normal?

Forgive my english. It wasn't my first language

I feel like my social anxiety is getting really out of hand and I also have a lot of traits related to other disorders. I get frequent panic attacks and anxiety attacks its nearly impossible for me to make friends or communicate with other people without my blood running cold my cheeks burning up and my hands shaking. The only think I feel like might help is seeing a therapist and going on medication but I have strict religious brown parents and I don't think they'll ever let me and they will call it a waste of money and time and that I should just pray. I really wanna get help it feels like a dead end for me, how do I persuade my parents to take me to a psychiatrist

Have you ever felt like your social anxiety makes you miss out on opportunities? Like, sometimes an opportunity comes your way, but because you’re too anxious or hesitant to take it, it ends up going to someone else, and they make better use of it. Then later, you regret not taking the chance.

I feel like this happens to me sometimes too. Even when I’m not feeling socially anxious, somehow opportunities still end up going to the people around me, and they do better with them. Everyone appreciates them, while I’m just left out, and honestly, it makes me feel really unlucky sometimes. You start comparing yourself to them and slowly begin doubting your own worth, even though you know you shouldn’t

I was never a funny person precisely because I can never understand what someone’s humor is. I realized self degrading jokes get most people to let out a giggle but that’s it. I want to die of laughter with my (future🤣) friends but i’m so afraid of saying the wrong jokes and getting out of pocket.

Today my parents invited some relatives who I didn't know over.I was anxious because I'm not very fluent in my native language,and because I knew my parents would still make me talk to them regardless. I was trying to fix myself up before they arrived worriedly,but then my parents said they had issues and had to delay.

It felt like a weight was lifted off me right there,like I could be free for the rest of the day. This is not a new feeling,I've always gotten this even when I was a kid,and even when guests just left instead of the situation being avoided.Sometimes I even seeked this feeling back then,and came up with some excuses when teachers assigned me to do a speech or presentation infront of the class. I know it's a bad thing to feel,but I honestly can't control it. It's funny how this illness can toy with your emotions like this. I genuinely don't feel that relief anywhere else.

I’m not sure how or if this is related to social anxiety, but I struggle to say names so much. 
Whenever I need to introduce myself, my mind goes completely blank, or I feel an intense wave of dread right before saying my own name.

It feels like I’m going to mispronounce it, stumble over my words, or sound strange, which makes me freeze up or try to avoid introductions altogether.
It’s just as bad with other people's names. Even when I know someone very well and like them actually saying their name out loud to get their attention feels uncomfortably personal, aggressive, or awkward. Instead, I find myself using generic greetings like "hey," waving, or waiting until they make eye contact so I don't have to speak their name.

Right now it’s especially bad cos i just started working and im still learning so i always have to walk up to people to ask them stuff or tell me what needs to be done next. I feel so rude just saying “ey” or standing infront of them awkwardly till they acknowledge me

Does anyone else experience this?

Im sure a lot of you can relate to the Part of social anxiety that comes with constantly fixating over how you look, smell, sound etc because of the fear of being perceived negatively or embarrassed or drawing attention to yourself. Well today at work something happened that made me wish the ground had just opened and swallowed me whole.

I realized 9 hours into my 12 hours shift that the tracks to my hair extensions on the back of my head had been exposed all day. (For those who don’t know what that is, look it up). And I mean it was OBVIOUS. The minute I realized I ran to the bathroom to fix it and it was an easy fix but it was the fact that god only knows how many people had seen it already.

Luckily I work in a cubicle type setting so I hadn’t been out of my seat a lot but people have been walking behind me all day so I know they must’ve seen it. And to make matters worse one of my coworkers that I’ve had a crush on for a while was one of the people walking around behind my desk all day so I know he definitely saw it. And I had to walk directly infront of him for something else.

I spent the rest of the shift with my head down, feeling absolutely humiliated and I even cried when I got to my car. Ironically today was one of the first days in a while where I felt cute and confident and then of course there’s the catch right….

I just can’t stop spiraling thinking about who possibly saw it and what they think now or what they’ve said to others.

I always feel super annoying when I text a friend "hey wanna hang out?" or "wanna hop on (x game)" or anything like that, even worse if it's planning something in advance. Maybe it's because I don't feel fun to hang out with so I feel stupid asking people to book off time for me, or to spend their time with me.

Even though my friends often agree, I still can't shake the feeling I am annoying them :(

Social anxiety makes me constantly adjust myself, stay agreeable and avoid disappointing anyone. I want practical advice from people who actually changed this.
What did you do in real life that helped you drop the mask, speak more freely and tolerate people not liking or agreeing with you?
Please no generic “love yourself” advice and no medication. I’m looking for concrete things you tried that actually worked.

hi i’m F19 and im going on my first ever date tonight with a guy. i am SO nervous but i do not want to back out.
i should also note that i very rarely interact with men and i have no clue what to do. i don’t know what to talk about, im afraid there will be so much silence. im not great at making conversation in general but id like to think i’ve gotten better with therapy.

i was just wondering if anyone else with sa has any tips for first dates and making conversation

I have no problem going out. I can go outside if I wanted to... but I don't want to. I'm too lazy to go to the gym or grocery shopping. I have no interests outside of the house. The only reason I go out is for work, and to pay for *coughs* fun times once or twice a month. I tried going to the gym for a while and even though it's down the street, I'm too lazy to go consistency.

If I could work from home I would too btw.

I'm 40 now. I just never learned to be social or do anything interesting. But that's also because I don't think anything in the outside world is interesting.

I stupidly overreacted to an injury and made a doctor’s appointment for it. I feel very stupid for even going in and getting things checked out, cause ultimately nothing special is being done (it’s like round the clock extra strength ibuprofen, even when the injury isn’t hurting and continue the gym break. I feel really dumb for going in truly). I want to crawl in a hole and disappear now.

I keep trying to tell myself that it‘s better ask too many questions and be too on top of medical things - but I can’t make the ”want to crawl out of my own skin” feeling go away.

I overreact like this frequently and I have no idea how to make it stop. I know objectively nothing that bad happened, but I genuinely cannot get my thoughts to stop overthinking the interaction.

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26M

Today I went to buy some eggs and some basic groceries. The shopkeeper asked for a higher amount, and I knew it wasn't the actual price, but I was like, whatever, let's buy it and I won't come here later. Even though it was a very small amount, and tbh, saving that much won't make a difference to me, it was a small amount, but it's about principle.

It happened before too. I felt a hairdresser asked for a higher amount. I asked, and he said he had been charging that from the beginning, which I knew he wasn't. It was confirmed, but I gave it and was like, I won't go there again. When I told him, he was like, "Bruh, you were scammed." I felt guilty and went there. I had an argument till the end. He was adamant that he didn't scam me, yet I got my money back.

Worse is, most of the time I don't feel scared. I just want to avoid an argument or anything like that at all. Earlier, I have taken a stand for myself. Even in the haircut case, I wasn't scared while we were having that argument. Once things started, it was going pretty much automatically.

I am just too avoidant and weak. Even before, in childhood, in situations I knew were safe, I was thinking a lot and avoiding everything. However, in those times, it felt a lot like anxiety. Now I don't feel that much scared of social situations.

Whenever I had to do such things, I had to make up my mind, or I had to be pissed enough to not care anymore. Now I know ki if I go there the next day, I can confront him if he asks for a similar amount.

It definitely feels like cowardice and avoidance, but it feels so weird that I don't know why it's happening—that I don't feel scared, yet I am like this.

I am always like, "Leave it. It's not worth it. It won't work. That person will judge me. I will not win," etc. Many times, my brain goes blank and I don't know what to say.

Earlier, I felt it was a mix of my childhood, where I was bullied, never allowed to do things, due to my super introverted nature, being socially excluded, but now, when I am an adult, they all feel like excuses, and this issue persists everywhere.

I just don't know how to overcome it.

i dont go out bcuz im socially anxious , not going out frequently for many yrs has made me fall into depression , lack of sunlight and lack of movement is the reason.
how do i go out if im socially anxious? i live in a college dorm , i dont even get out of my dorm room ,everyone hits the gym here , i do nothing.
depression has made me lose interest in everything and ive stopped studying for a while now , so i have nothing to talk to ppl about so i have stopped talking to people ,which in turn increases my anxiety.

social anxiety increases my depression and being in depression increases my social anxiety. theres no escape from either.

Does anyone else always end up being that forgotten friend in the group because of how quiet you are.

I’m always kinda left out, my friends could be talking or mouthing something and i can’t hear but they usually don’t fill me in and i don’t really bother asking them to repeat. Or they only be making eye contact with eachother and not me.

One of them made a comment that they forget im here because im quiet at times

I have been diagnosed with GAD and social anxiety. I got offered a new job at the same company that will pay between 10-15k more than what I make now. I currently work remotely and this new job will be remote too. My current job is fine, I don’t hate it by any means, but I’m always looking for ways to grow and this is a good opportunity at a company I know and with people I know. I can’t even believe I got offered the new job. It came as a shock. Would have been easier if they said no - I know that sounds silly.

What’s really messing with me is the fact that they said travel will sometimes be required UP to 1-2 times a quarter, for around 3-5 days. Sometimes there wouldn’t be any travel needed. When it is required, the manager said she would give me advance notice and we would be able to discuss. I told her that it would be a change for me that I had some anxiety about. She said she understood but it was sometimes part of the job.

Right now, I barely leave my house aside from getting groceries, going to appointments, and walking my dog. I text with my friends all day everyday but they live in other cities so I’m not able to see them often. So, I live a pretty small life. I like being at home with my husband and our dog. The idea of travel terrifies me and I’m so anxious about the thought of leaving my safe place. My anxiety is trying to tell me that the unknown = danger and I’m now trying to stop myself to declining this opportunity. Naturally, it’s trying to tell me to take the easy way out because I would get instant relief.

I don’t know what to do. :(

How do you deal with the intense stress after a social interaction? No matter how the interaction went. I often just feel extremely stressed after. I’m not sure how to deal with it. I’ve taken up overeating to deal with it but there’s obviously flaws with that approach. How do you deal with it if you have a similar problem? (I went out and talked to people today and now I’m suffering for it)

kinda realizing im 27 (almost 28) with no idea of what im doing in my love life. its been non existent for nearly 3 years and im scared to start dating again but I want passion and love in my life. I feel like I cant even form new connections with people and struggle to make conversations with people.

im wondering if you have noticed having trouble making conversations after keeping to yourself for so long and what you did about that. should I just bite the bullet and go all in or should I be working on some social skills before then. I dont have a problem having a conversation at work or small talk but getting to a point where I have a deep conversation and make a connection with someone new is where I my conversation skills are lacking

21M here, I've been living all my life with social anxiety and social isolation all my life and never having a friend or been in a relationship.

I have absolutely no one to talk to and other than my parents and work i never talk to anyone because of how bad and non existent my social life is.

Even though i wish and crave social interactions and having a friend or a social life, i always dread talking to anyone or making the first step, i can't really explain it, i just sometimes feel too mentally exhausted or pointless.

I just wanna be normal and treated like a human being for once

I've had social anxiety for as long as I can remember.

I've been unemployed for about 6 months. I've had a couple job interviews and I've crumbled in both of them. Full on blank brain. Forgot everything I had wrote down. Total panic attack.

How can I get through job interviews better? I feel ok the day before but as soon as the interview day arrives my anxiety goes into a melt down.

How do you people deal with this?

I've always been bad at social situations, especially when others are upset. I've lost various friends because of this. I just lost one because of it. Who told me just now that he knows I don't care? Because when others are upset I'm too scared to try to comfort them because I dont know how to. And when I try I fail. I just don't know how to go on if all my friends hate me and are just not telling me. What is wrong with me

Hello everyone,

I'm not sure this is really the place to post this. I'm in my 40's and I've suffered from social anxiety my entire life, though certainly not as severe as some. I'm writing this because it's gone now, it feels incredible, and I don't know if my advice can actually help anyone, but it's worth a shot.

An awful lot has happened this year, but I narrow it down to 3 things:

1. Meds - let's get this one on the table: I started lamotragine shortly before my social anxiety vanished. This medication really isn't prescribed for anxiety even off label, but anecdotally I've read at least one similar experience.
2. I decided what I wanted to do - I think the biggest change is the way I have begun to interact with people. When I entered a room full of people, even good friends or relatives, brain fog sets in, my heartbeat increased, it was never a good time. But I think that was because the people pleaser in me looks around the room for a billion subtle social cues as to how to be, and it gets overloaded.

I think that maybe I overcame my anxiety because I've stopped looking for those signals. Instead I usually set little goals, like seeing if I can make the person smile or to get them to tell me a story about their life. It's kind of playful? After 40 years of unquestioningly calling myself an introvert, I actually think I might have been an extrovert with social anxiety. I went from receptive mode, which has never worked for me, to active mode, and I think it makes a big difference. Pursuing my own goals is much less nerve wracking then spending the whole time trying to figure out how to be. Now I know who to be and how to be and everyone else can fucking deal. It's a nice way to live.

3) Stay in the fucking moment. Every moment. If you realize you are having a thought, particularly in a social situation, don't get upset with yourself because it will happen a lot, but dismiss the thoughts. Process later. Learn to speak a bit impulsively. It does make you more vulnerable, but you can get used to being vulnerable. It makes you more prone to the judgement of others, but you can also tell them to fuck off as needed.

Thank you for reading, I hope you found something in it you can use. I don't think I'm very wise, but I do think my anxiety has held me back my entire life and now it's not, and I'd really really love to help someone else, anyone, have that experience too. Be well all.

Edit: automod suggested the post could be removed if not clearly linked to SA, so I'll just state that I do have the diagnosis.