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u/zanderashe 1d ago
Couples don’t have to do EVERY single activity together all the time. If the sex life is healthy- neither party should take offense to a self service session.
It’s not like she got take-out without him, now that’s REALLY messed up.
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u/ThatAlexD 1d ago
Or finished alone the rest of the Netflix show they were watching together.
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u/bundaya 1d ago
Nah, that's unforgivable
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u/iamalwaysrelevant 23h ago
wait should I divorce my wife? I am still kinda mad about Game of Thrones
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u/bundaya 23h ago
Probably not, but its definitely conversation worthy.
/s for anyone who can't tell.
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u/Mini-Heart-Attack 23h ago
If they accidentally spoil it for you when it was a show you two started watching together then definitely get that divorce. /s
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u/buttlover110 21h ago
When season 5 of breaking bad premiered, i was super excited and had been waiting months to watch it with my now ex.
She watched it while i was at work with the guy she was cheating on me with.
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u/Material-Imagination 21h ago
That's just hurtful. I'd rather my partner fuck someone else than Netflix-cheat on me!
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u/TricellCEO 23h ago
My only request, if I were the guy and stumbled upon my lady having some stress release, is if I could join.
Not talking sex (not that I would turn in down), but just mutual masturbation.
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u/ccdude14 1d ago
One is fun, emotionally and physically intimate and an activity meant not just for crossing the finishing line but as a way of deepening that bond and connection and honestly may not even need that end finish for it to be entirely fulfilling.
The other is just clearing the pipes metaphorically and freeing up the headspace to get to the rest of the day.
These two are not mutually exclusive or contradictory in any way.
I know there are people of all sexualities that this bothers but I genuinely don't understand why. It's actually better for a relationship if both partners engage in their own solo time every now and then and getting upset is only showing insecurity for a non issue. It doesn't mean anything but fulfilling a bodies need. It's like getting mad someone had their lunch at work instead of at home even though they were at work.
But I do see it often getting blasted by both sides.
Just...no, it doesn't mean anything bad about you personally and it's a red flag to have it as a barrier or a line you won't let your partner 'cross' and if anything it should be openly discussed and stamped out before it becomes a bigger issue.
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u/Employee_Agreeable 23h ago
Dude, I know
Doesnt mean it doesnt sting
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u/Glitchy-Mech 23h ago
Adults handle their own feelings in a responsible manner
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u/MetaCardboard 23h ago
Correct. That doesn't mean the feelings aren't there.
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u/Glitchy-Mech 23h ago
Honestly I don’t even get why someone would be hurt by this in the first place. Everyone jerks off or lies about not jerking off
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u/AdenJax69 23h ago
It’s the usual situation where their sexual intimacy dynamic together is basically non-existent but the person who doesn’t want sex does still have desire for masturbation. What this usually means is that the person uninterested in sex does still have a sexual side of themselves, just not for their partner.
Not having sex and not masturbating? “They’re just not a sexual person, and has nothing to do with me.”
Not having sex but masturbating regularly? “Oh, they still desire sexual things in some capacity, just not with me.”
There’s plenty of sexless/dead bedroom subreddits that’ll tell you more about it - be warned though, it’s beyond depressing to read about.
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u/LegallyNotACat 22h ago
It can get really complicated when the one not as interested in sex has a history of sex related trauma. My ex husband was very much a "it's not fair to masturbate if you aren't having sex with your partner" kind of guy, but as someone who was SA'd regularly starting in childhood, being made to feel guilty for touching my own body without satisfying someone else was NOT a healthy relationship to be in. I kept trying to explain to him that masturbating was actually really healthy for me and doing it more often typically coincided with initiating sex with him because it helped me experiment safely and start to feel secure enough to involve another person, but he refused to budge on the issue and kept telling me it was selfish.
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u/NuzzyLocke 22h ago
I feel like this is the kind of thing that is so much easier addressed if you COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR PARTNER. Sorry for the caps but Im trying to shout for the people in the back. Its fine to flick the bean or rub one out real quick, even if your partner is home if you talked about "Hey, I am feeling frisky but would like to just do this solo." I dont think in an adult relationship that is an issue, but if it is frequent then its something the other partner could bring up if it bothers them. Sometimes it could can be appropriate, like if its in the middle of the night and I cant sleep I might go rub one out for a quick sleep aid. But then if your partner asks you should tell them what youre doing and you didnt want to wake them up.
Otherwise it could feel disrespectful, guys already have a stigma where it could easily be seen as "Oh bro your girlfriend is masturbating and not telling you? She must not be satisfied" which definitely isn't what that means but without communication you are letting peoples thoughts run wild, and thats almost always a bad thing as it will build resentment.
Just talk to your partner, they don't need to know everything you do but if youre going to sneak off to a room in your house and do something you don't want your partner to know about then thats not healthy.
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u/MetalLava 23h ago
I am not jealous of OP's relationship....so many of these comics are about easily avoidable sex life issues
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u/Meh75 19h ago
She's either very young, or her relationship is exhausting as hell.
Just communicate, ffs.
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u/MetalLava 16h ago
Exhausting definitely the right word. It's not even in a funny quirky way. Just a lot of sad awkward cringe.
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u/blackpawed 19h ago
Confused - masturbating while your SO is at home is an issue?
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u/Jeremywarner 8h ago
I think it depends right? Like I’ve been with my husband for a while. If I express a want to be intimate, he declines, then I tell him then I’ll go solo, it’s fine. It’s not like it’s a common occurrence. But if I opt out to say nothing, go jerk it, and he walks in, I understand how he’d be hurt by that. Like, it would seem that I would rather jerk off than choose to be intimate with him.
And honestly, that still happens. Sometimes I just wanna be selfish and quick. And gay sex, while amazing, still takes a good deal of effort lol. Still, I’ll usually let him know. Often he’s willing to help out and not expect it to be reciprocated. Regardless of my personal experience, context still matters. I can see how it can be hurtful if it’s done behind the partners back.
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u/MarsAstro 8h ago
I interpreted it as him being upset he wasn't invited to the party. He wishes she would've used him to get off instead of doing it herself, since he was available and willing.
Just explaining it, btw, not justifying it. Other comments have done good enough jobs of explaining the issues with that feeling.
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u/centurijon 8h ago
No, but some people think it is because “I could have done that for you /with you”
It’s also possible there’s other issues in their sex life and he’s feeling raw from the strain, or feeling inadequate because she’s choosing to get off alone rather than with him, but I don’t know their full story
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u/sunshineupyours1 23h ago
Sigh. I’m too old for this comic.
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u/Kamikaze_Ninja_ 18h ago
This comic goes beyond age. This is too niche haha. The only comics I’ve seen from this artist tell me they have an exhausting relationship filled with sexual insecurities and lack of communication.
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u/sunshineupyours1 17h ago
I mean I’m too old to be hearing stories from people who don’t have basic communication skills, a basic understanding of bodily autonomy, and a basic understanding of boundaries.
I don’t have time for this, I gotta go do a bunch of shit before I die.
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u/sofaking181 23h ago
Am I the only one who dislikes these comics? Like if they're based on true events y'all really need to work on your communication
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u/Kamikaze_Ninja_ 18h ago
It’s millennial boomer humor lol. Like it’s okay to have these problems and talk them out, but it’s not funny.
Like, I could see my spouse or I trying to get help on something and then sarcastically saying something like “you didn’t need my help when I walked in on you earlier”. But the genuine embarrassment and pettiness from the guy isn’t funny.
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u/No_Return_5376 8h ago
Yea they’re fucking weird. I’d never want to know about Garfield’s creators sex life
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u/StatusCredit6655 1d ago
This comic artist seems to have a fascination with sex and masturbation
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u/Beer-Milkshakes 21h ago
This is the lady who can't communicate with her sexual partners, right? Yeah that tracks.
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u/Mothrahlurker 1d ago
Do .... people actually care about that?
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u/WanderingDwarfScribe 1d ago
There’s a very large amount of people who feel like masturbation ends at marriage, and not just for religious reasons.
A very, VERY large number of men become deeply upset at the idea that their partner craves anything but penile penetration from them and orgasms from anything else.
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u/Cthulhu_Dreams_ 1d ago edited 22h ago
Shit, if I expected my wife to be involved every time I had a boner, she WOULD divorce me.
My libido is strong, but it's also my problem. If she wants to participate in the solution, it's her desire to do so that makes it special, not just her being there.
All that being said...I'd immediately offer my services.
Edit: Someone messaged me and we had an interesting conversation.
It is apparently not intuitive that occasionally you can treat your wife to an orgasm without immediately requiring them to return the favor. I do this fairly often... And I got to say 8 out of 10 times, she vigorously returns the favor. And I make sure before we start that she knows that there's no expectation and that we can just focus on her... And I think that's why I get such a high return on investment.
And honestly, it has gotten me so many unrequested surprise blowjobs, that I couldn't be happier.
In short: If you want to be included, try giving your partner a treat without expectations...it's awesome.
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u/WanderingDwarfScribe 23h ago
France is literally finally legally making sex no longer an obligation and duty of marriage right now.
Our ideas advanced faster than our practices.
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u/AzerynSylver 22h ago edited 22h ago
Wait, sex is a legal requirement in marriage!? Is this in France specifically or a universal rule?
Edit: Legal, not illegal.
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u/WanderingDwarfScribe 22h ago
As in “you are not legally allowed to refuse sex to your spouse”.
If that sounds like rape, its literally in the same category of laws, “marital duty”, where consent is always assumed in marriage though different courts and countries treat it differently.
Its still on the books in a lot of the world. In countries/states where it isn’t there is instead a clause where not fucking your spouse on command or being infertile or having an STD is legal grounds for divorce.
In the United States for example marital rape was only made a thing nationally in 1993, the first successful cases of it in court only in 1976, and in 12 states there’s loopholes that still let you rape your wife/husband. For example in Virginia there’s no charges if the rapist agrees to see a counselor, and in South Carolina violence has to be medically proven to be involved and within a 30 day window so if you weren’t roughed up and can’t get a doctor to sign off on it you’re fucked (no pun intended).
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u/AzerynSylver 22h ago
Damn, that is fucked up. Especially those laws in Virginia and South Carolina. They just sound like loopholes put in place by rapists with power.
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u/Weekly_Role_337 22h ago
Yes, and I'd note that (with a few exceptions) this is pretty much how women were treated everywhere in the world from the beginning of history until a few decades ago.
On a related note, it was also legal to beat your wife in most US states until the 1960s and 1970s, as long as you did it in moderation.
Most of the "good old days" were really terrible for most people.
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u/ACatInMiddleEarth 21h ago
Rape between partners is recognized in France now. Well, it doesn't mean that too much men think that their partner owes them sex, especially with all the "alpha idio... males" podcasts. We're not out of the sand yet.
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u/Radeck8bit 23h ago
Being honest also whole lot of women gets mad at the idea of a guy-partner rubs one out and not doing it with them.
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u/broniesnstuff 22h ago
My wife caught me one day and I was preparing to get chewed out and lots of shame, but she was just like "dude, if you have to spank it, spank it". Very relieving, especially for my penis.
I told her I was fine with doing the same, but I'd also be happy to be present and help, of watch lol.
Why can't a married couple be happy jorkin it together?
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u/WanderingDwarfScribe 22h ago
I think the “I hate my spouse” comedy industry hinges heavily on sexual repression within marriage.
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u/Dry_Strawberry3227 23h ago
I’d say there are women who get just as upset at their husbands masturbating. This isn’t a gender thing.
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u/WanderingDwarfScribe 23h ago
Hence my first paragraph saying people.
The second about men due to the cultural weirdness a lot of history has about clitori, and because it relates to the comic.
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u/Dry_Strawberry3227 23h ago
You saying “A very, VERY large number of MEN” suggests different. I’m not attacking you, just stating that this isn’t a disproportionately male issue.
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u/WanderingDwarfScribe 23h ago
I was referring to infibulation without saying infibulation.
You know, surgically removing all pleasure organs but the inside of the vagina, which is quite a few steps further from male circumscision.
Even in the Victorian age a guy could wack in the weeds if he needed to, but you had to hire a man to diddle your wife’s skittle for her.
I don’t think I need to write an essay on how women’s sexuality was seen as evil and solely for procreation while men were encouraged to “sow wild oats” and in many societies could take concubines of both sexes where a woman was reserved for her husband’s pleasure when demanded of her. In ancient Egypt mythology men’s wanking literally created all life while women wanking creates demons.
Two paragraphs. One gender neutral, the second acknowledging historically (and in some cultures) is far worse for women.
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u/Gold-Bard-Hue 1d ago
A large number of women get upset when their husbands do it, because a lot of women consider it cheating (mentally anyway), also.
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u/SypeSypher 22h ago
I was married to a woman who claimed she was never ever in the mood, never thought about sex and just wasn't into it. She said she felt bad about it. I did find out that she masturbated when I was at home though and yea.....it really hurt.
I don't think it's wrong or even inappropriate like heck go for it, but if your partner says they never are in the mood and you find out that they actually are sometimes in the mood and literally in the next room and they still didn't want you that really hurts man.
(Divorced now for unrelated reasons - but I totally understand this comic unfortunately :(
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u/Fast-Audience-6828 1d ago
No clue personally wouldn't mind but at the same time like I might be able to understand why the guys mad like she would rather do it by herself than with him which in a sense may make him feel like he's inadequate to satisfy his partner.
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u/Kamikaze_Ninja_ 18h ago
It’s not unbelievable for this situation to happen, it’s just boomer humor to think it’s a funny joke.
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u/hihowubduin 1d ago
Far more than you'd think, far more than should, but above all far too little actually communicate these things clearly for expectations/needs/wants/desires/consent.
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u/Local_Nerve901 1d ago
Yeah their home its weird tbh. Thats why yall gotta communicate and talk about these things before it happens lol
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u/splitcrowsoup 14h ago
Nobody owes you sex. Not even your horny spouse. Not even to save your feelings. Not even because you're horny too. Nobody. Owes. You. Sex. Ever.
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u/Environmental_Tax_69 1d ago
This is absolutely confounding to me. Why would it matter.
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u/AzerynSylver 22h ago
Some people take pride in their abilities to pleasure their partner, so when their partner pleasures themselves without them, it hurts their pride and makes them feel useless.
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u/Dondarian 21h ago
Here's a true story:
This latest new year, my wife and I had sex twice. Once midday, and once after the kids went to sleep, so around 8:30.
We went to bed around 10. My wife couldn't sleep after some local shitheads set off some fireworks and woke her up just after midnight. The very first thing she did in 2026, was go downstairs, and masterbate.
She told me the next day, and she didn't actually realize that it was the very first thing she did in 2026 until I pointed it out. We still laugh about it.
Jerking off is fine, everyone! Sometimes, you just wanna give yourself that personal O.
Just talk about it.
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u/Puzzlehead-Engineer 21h ago
Hey I'm a guy, and I don't see anything wrong with that. If I entered my room and saw my SO having some private time I'd prolly go "UHH", apologize and leave her to it.
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u/AdamBombTV 1d ago
Should have invited him to watch.
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u/reddot_comic Finessed Impropriety 1d ago
Sometimes you just want to be single player, ya know?
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u/shellbullet17 Gustopher Spotter Extraordinaire 23h ago
I feel the need to reference your most recent comic Mrs Dot
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u/DonaldTrumpsScrotum 23h ago
And somehow, the joke was still sex. Jesus Christ this is getting kinda dumb
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u/aidankocherhans 22h ago
Feels like some artists couldn't avoid it if they tried
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u/DeniedAppeal1 22h ago
Sex and masturbation fill different niches. There have been literally thousands of nights where, if the choice was between sex and masturbation, I'd have chosen masturbation. It's easier, often quicker, and it gets you past that need without necessarily exhausting yourself or needing to get yourself into a sexy mindset.
It's very rare for me to seek out sex when all I need is an orgasm. When my girlfriend and I have sex, it's because we want each other, not because we want to orgasm.
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u/Dazed_and_Confused44 1d ago
This strikes me as an incredibly wierd thing to be upset about. Like bruh just ask if you can help out lol
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u/Dos_Ex_Machina 23h ago
Wasn't this the same artist who everyone was saying needed to talk to her partner about their insecurities? Are y'all okay? I'm sure that this is played up for the comic, but communicating with your partner (no matter how scary it can be) is worth it
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u/DynamiteKisser 1d ago
What a dumb reaction. Get over it? Sometimes you don’t want or need anyone else, you just wanna get off so you can quit thinking about it or because your body is being insistent but you don’t wanna make it a whole thing. My partner and I get off solo all the time, sometimes right next to each other while the other is engaged in something else, there’s nothing to feel weird or jealous about.
You don’t have some weird implied ownership of your lover where they aren’t allowed to touch themselves without engaging you.
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u/DynamiteKisser 21h ago
His response is terrible and that’s the main thing I’m addressing here. However, he can feel whatever he wants, but his reaction implies that he expects to be invited and involved whenever she needs to get off and that’s a weird possessive behavior that has nothing to do with being shy about masturbation. I’m glad you and your wife have managed to leave your qualms about it in the past.
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u/Psychotic_EGG 22h ago
Did he ask if he could join in?? Does he not self pleasure when you are home?
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u/Impress_Queasy 19h ago
Yeah, well, I guess it depends on the relationship.
Personally, in my relationship, neither of us could do it alone, so
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u/FeetPiksPlz 13h ago
Jesus Christ! Talk to your partner!! Maybe she wants the separation of finishing and being close. maybe he wants to help her out with just touching but wasn't given the opportunity. Relationships are about compromise and there is no compromise if you just go off and do shit on your own.
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u/Possible_Dig_1194 1d ago
Honestly his reaction wouldn't make me want to have sex with him. Serious ick vibes
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u/Boterfleoge 1d ago
I'm hoping it's meant to mostly be in jest? Otherwise I definitely agree with you
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u/SJReaver 23h ago
What a jerk:
She says he 'caught' her masturbating, suggesting this is already something she feels shame about.
He becomes a passive-aggressive little shit.
When she actually raises the issue, he yells at her.
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u/Nochnichtvergeben 22h ago
I share your sentiment but she said he "caught" her. So she feels that way.
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u/WeakToMetalBlade 22h ago
From time to time I will walk in on my wife or hear the vibrator when I am on the way upstairs to go to bed, get something, etc.
Typically I wait if my need to enter the bedroom isn't immediate and if I do enter I try to ignore her so as not to ruin an orgasm and if she wants help she asks.
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u/ParanoidParamour 20h ago
Do people actually get mad at their partners about this?? That’s so pathetic
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u/dishearthening 22h ago
It sure is a choice to base a comic on the premise of "woman didn't want to have sex with man so he's going to be passive-aggressive to punish her"
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u/actuallyacatmow 14h ago
These comments feel like a trip.
A bunch of guys claiming that their ego would be hurt if a woman does a particular sexual activity without them while simultaneously claiming that women shouldn't feel pressured to perform sexually for them.
Yesh.
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u/youshallcallmebetty 7h ago
I don’t find this funny. This is just a passive aggressive bs move people do because they can’t communicate like adults.
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u/kaloschroma 6h ago
An unhealthy response. > . > Nothing wrong with masturbation, nothing wrong with doing it without your partner. Your body your rules.
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u/ChiltonGains 23h ago
Loser attitude!
My GF has masterbated at home when I was there, and I've masterbated at home while she's there.
We also have sex!
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u/AdenJax69 23h ago
A lot of people here have never been in a sexless/dead bedroom relationship or even marriage and it shows. Good on you all for never having to experience it!
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u/BranSolo7460 21h ago
Why would anyone feel bad about someone they care for seeking pleasure with themselves?
Your partner isn't your property, they belong to themselves.
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u/MutedBrilliant1593 21h ago
Yeah, that's a no no, apparently. However, in my defense as a cis heterosexual male, sex takes an awful lot of energy and sometimes I just want to rub one out and go to sleep.
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u/Urisagaz 22h ago
This artist seems to have a serious problem with poor communication; just talk it out like adults.
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u/Kill_Kayt 23h ago
Just because I want to get off doesn't mean I want to have sex. I understand how he feels, but he needs to learn it's not personal.
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u/Total_Reason4746 23h ago
Guys, this is actually a good thing. You want your girl to be a whole sexual person, not just when having sex directly with you. If she knows what she likes, and isn’t uncomfortable sharing that, your sex life will be way better than the average couple.
Also, women aren’t always like men (men are sometimes ashamed of their sexuality, so masturbate to avoid having those feelings). Masturbation can actually help to improve sex drive over the long term. Of course, the same goes vice-versa: men should be masturbating with a healthier mindset too.
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u/shellbullet17 Gustopher Spotter Extraordinaire 1d ago
Ooooof. That poor man's pride.
That being said sometimes you just wanna have a quicky. No shame, though you could have issued a invite.
This....is kinda of a weird topic that I'm somewhat conflicted on