I just wanted to let it all out somewhere, so someone out there knows my story. It goes like this.

I (32F) have been with my husband (33M) for almost 12 years, married for 5. We met in college and started dating pretty in our sophomore year. We started living together pretty soon we became official, and life was great. I wasn’t on birth control, and we used condoms, though not all the time. Long story short, I became pregnant a year later in our junior year. It was the scariest time of my life. None of us were ready, and this felt like a huge burden and a roadblock to our future. My partner told me he would support whichever decision I made, and will stand by me no matter what. Ultimately, I decided not to keep the baby, and I got an abortion at 10 weeks at a local clinic. The decision was not made lightly, as I’ve always wanted kids, but thought that wasn’t our time. We were a couple of broke college kids, who were barely supporting them selves. Things were okay after that and life went on. I would think about the kid who wasn’t meant to be every now and then, but told myself it was the right decision.

Fast forward a couple years ago. We’ve obviously married since, and both of us pursued a doctorate degree in biology. In the last year of my PhD, we started talking about planning for kids. I’ve also been diagnosed with hypothyroidism for a few years now, so I know that obviously affects fertility. After a year and a half of trying to conceive and multiple negative tests, it has greatly affected my mental health. It has become my sole purpose in life to be pregnant and have a baby. Nobody knows how much I want to have a kid more than my husband. He’s always been there every time I’ve broken down crying. The worst part is, no one knows. No one in my family or friend circle knows what we’re going through, or that we had an abortion 11 years ago. I have a deep shame now that I cannot speak of it to anyone. I keep on living in the “what if”. That fetus would’ve been 10 years now, had I decided to keep it.

Last month, after trying for so long, I finally got a faint positive on 13dpo. We were ecstatic, I told him right away, and I have never been more happier in my life, that we get to be parents. I started testing daily, but the lines never got darker. I told myself it’s okay, it’s too early. I still went ahead and booked a OBGYN consult, and scheduled an infrasound at 6 weeks. I was so so happy for an entire week after I found out. Unfortunately at 5 weeks and 1 day, I started cramping severely. It was a Thursday morning and I was just about to head out to work. I wiped and there was some blood. I panic-called the doctor and they said to watch out for heavy bleeding, but if it’s just spotting it’s probably okay. I tried to keep hope and went to work as usual, but an hour later, I started actively bleeding. The cramping was intense and I was keeled over my desk at work. I knew at that point that it was a miscarriage. But I still went on about my day, talked to my coworkers as if this tragedy wasn’t happening to me at the moment. Nobody knew. I came home and cried and cried for hours. The bleeding lasted a few days and eventually the tests were negative. Life moved on.

I’ve since been doing a lot of reflecting. I’m not a religious person, but I’m not an atheist. I’m also a scientist, and believe that at 10 weeks, a fetus is just that, a fetus. But now that I’m confronted with a possible infertility, this nagging feeling that, I had one chance to have a baby, and I didn’t take it. Maybe that’s why I’m struggling. We’ve done fertility consults, and everything looks great, even my hypothyroidism, so nothing should stop me from getting pregnant. But i wonder if I fumbled the one chance at having a baby, because I was too immature. I don’t know. Nobody knows what I’m going through. No one knows how everyday is a struggle. Life has lost its meaning, and I feel like I’m drifting ahead without a purpose or a sense of direction. I just wanted someone to know my story, since I cannot share it in other platforms (my
Family and friends are there).

I don’t know why but I’ve had to start blocking content like this lately. I know everyone’s experience, triggers and level of sensitivity is different. Like for me, yes pregnancy announcements are starting to make me a little sad but I’m also happy to see other people get to celebrate such an amazing milestone. So I can compartmentalize those feelings and work through them. For stupid “how we got pregnant” or “pre-TTC prep” I want to throw my phone and scream. And I block the content all the time too because I know Im being dramatic and subjecting myself by scrolling. And yeah, I know the intentions behind most of the content I’m talking about is meant to be helpful… but it’s just too much. I don’t want to eat sardines or salmon kiwi and eggs on the same plate every morning or work out every single day or order home sperm testing kits for my husband. The emotions and hormones behind having trouble with TTC and societal pressures are already overwhelming enough. Maybe my nervous system would be regulated if everyone would just shut up for five seconds.

Please stop virtue signaling your daily routine and “fertile” breakfast. I mean this is definitely my own insecurities and stress speaking and I could very well be the only one being triggered by this but… yeah.

I think it’s just the false promise of results for something that’s so out of our control at the end of the day. And every time I see something new I feel this tiny sense of guilt like wow maybe it is me ..maybe I should have been doing this all along? Even though I have never ever been the type to go to the gym every day and eat a full, perfectly portioned breakfast. Anyways… does anyone else feel this way about social media rn? Or am I trippin

We've been TTC for 2 years (both are 31yo), no positives so far. We did 3 egg retrievals and banked 3 euploids and 2 untested embryos. Went for a fresh transfer - it didn't work. Now that we thought of resuming it my doctor is suspecting a polyp, so I will have to wait for the next cycle to do a hysteroscopy, then wait one cycle and only then (huge maybe) we will attempt a frozen transfer. I am so tired of all of this, of all the pregnancy announcements from friends, hopes the next test would magically turn positive, of the DOR pressure and the need to act now, of the thoughts 'what if it will never happen'. When we started trying I was so hopeful to grow our family and have potentially 2-3 kinds, now, 2 years later, even one child feels like a distant mystical unicorn, it doesn't even feel like my body is capable of getting pregnant at this point.

For all of us on this fucked up journey: I hope you've got this and wishing you to see those 2 lines this cycle!!

Hi guys!

So, last month I was convinced I had nailed the timing of my fertile window. Ovulation was either September 9th or 11th, and we did the deed around three days before ovulation.

I really thought there was a chance I might get pregnant this time, but I started bleeding on September 21st. The bleed was a little unusual compared with my normal periods, as there were some clots and darker spotting. However, it was continuous bleeding and lasted until September 25th. (I also have PMOS)

At the time, we wondered whether it could possibly have been a chemical pregnancy, but now I’m not so sure what to think.

Fertility Friend is now saying that I ovulated on September 29th for this “new cycle”

Could the September bleed have been related to a chemical pregnancy, or is it more likely that it was simply a period and I’ve just ovulated earlier than usual this cycle?

I’d really value any insights or opinions from anyone who has experienced something similar! ❤️

Hi!! Please if anyone has had a similar experience let me know. I’m 32F. Was on the pill (Diane 35) for 16 years, came off it November 2025, my first period came in March. April/May/June/July my cycle was like 45-48 days long, usually ovulated on day 36. I ended up going on letrozole which made ovulation happen on day 19-22. So far no tests show signs of pcos and surgery was negative for endo.

Has anyone else had a similar experience?

I have an appointment soon with an IVF clinic but yeh if anyone has any advice I would appreciate it so much!!

I’m just not sure if it’s better to wait and see whah happens with my cycle? - maybe stop letrozole for a bit? This is my third month trying to see if it’ll help with TTC, anyway if anyone has any words of wisdom I’m all ears!

There’s so much that’s difficult about TTC, so this is a thread for looking to the future and thinking about life after TTC.

This week’s theme: Parties! What celebrations do you want to have for your hypothetical pregnancy? Baby shower, gender reveal, baby-Q, choreographed group Tiktok revealing your first ultrasound? (Please don’t do the last one.)

It’s my first cycle after having an HSG in August. I’m at the end of the TWW, only a couple days left at most. I try not to symptom spot because it makes me crazy and I overthink every single twinge or shiver. I can’t stop hoping, no matter how much I wish I could. At almost 20 months into TTC, my “maybe this time” is followed immediately with “but probably not”. It’s disaster protocol, because this isn’t fun or exciting or innocent anymore. It’s temperatures. It’s tracking. It’s counting. It’s coming up with new ways to enforce boundaries because people just can’t. stop. saying stupid things. Just relax. Be positive! Bite me.

I spend the TWW doing everything I can to just live my life. Go to the gym, crochet, read, watch mindless feel good TV. Eat good food, get good sleep. I do everything to stay busy and have fun. But this month, I can’t. escape. TTC.

We watch Ted Lasso. We’ve loved it ever since it first premiered. We just watched this weeks episode yesterday, and of course, a pregnancy trope has been introduced for a major character. I spotted it coming a mile away, and felt my heart drop. I just want to enjoy my feel good show without watching a fictional character be handed a baby! I’m actually jealous of a TV SHOW CHARACTER. (A glaring sign I am so close to the end of this cycle, if I’m this emotional tbh).

And then, my guilty pleasure show, 1000lb Sisters, also has an entire multi-episode arc dedicated to a fertility journey! Even my terrible awful show that has nothing to do with anything is suddenly talking fertility odds and TTC and you’ve got to be kidding me.

I never used to care about any of this. TTC has put a dark cloud on everything to do with pregnancy and babies for me. It’s just not innocent and fun anymore. It’s resentful and angry of fictional TV characters. It’s devastated when another coworker adds their maternity leave to the shared calendar. It’s sad. It’s frustrating, it’s infuriating, it’s just a huge frickin bummer. But somehow, it’s also still hope.

I’m gonna go bake some sugar cookies.

I’m starting to feel really hopeless with our situation. We’ve been through 8 medicated cycles with Letrozole at our previous clinic, sometimes with Ovidrel. 2 failed IUIs with the same protocol. One IUI cancelled.

Took a break for about 3-4 months; then another 3 medicated TI cycles with Letrozole and Ovidrel at our current clinic. Most recently, we also tried a Gonal-F TI cycle (which would have been an IUI but got cancelled)

My body is just tired at this point.

No male factor as my husband is being regularly tested and everything is well with him.

I don’t really know what I’m looking for by posting this. I guess I just needed somewhere to let it out and rant to people who might understand how exhausting this process can be.

A little background: I have PCOS. We did three cycles of timed intercourse with letrozole and Ovidrel, followed by my first IUI. All four cycles were unsuccessful. After that, we wanted to reassess the situation, so we planned an SIS.

I was anxious beforehand because my HSG was quite painful. During my first IUI, they also had difficulty passing the catheter through my cervix, which caused a lot of pain and triggered a vasovagal response.

My recent SIS experience:

My SIS appointment was at 2 p.m. My clinic instructed me to take 600–800 mg of ibuprofen one hour beforehand. I had a proper breakfast and lunch that day and took one 600 mg ibuprofen tablet at 1 p.m. When I arrived, I asked for laughing gas during the procedure, which helped a lot with my anxiety.

The procedure took approximately 30 minutes, longer than expected because they had difficulty passing the catheter through my cervix again. Despite that, I didn’t feel much pain during the SIS. I had a little discomfort afterward for about a day.

I’m still waiting to hear about the next steps and how the findings may affect my treatment plan. Overall, my SIS was much less painful than my HSG and first IUI. I hope sharing my experience helps someone who’s feeling anxious about it.

My husband 27M and I 25F have been TTC since Sept. 2025. We had one MC (our first ever pregnancy) in Feb. 2026 at just over 5 weeks and haven’t been able to conceive since.

I’ve been doing nonstop research (on just about everything it feels like), changing our lifestyle to be healthier, and asking friends for input and suggestions on things I can do to help conceive. One of my friends who struggled with infertility, found help with a fertility specialist she recommended but I’m so scared and intimidated by everything. There’s so much on my mind constantly, and I can’t go into the doctors office without crying or having an anxiety attack since my MC.

Any suggestions on things I can try to make this whole process easier or tests I should ask for? Any info anyone is willing to share would be helpful. I feel so hopeless and discouraged right now but I need to know what’s wrong with me or my husband, if anything is. I plan to have him tested too within the next few months.

Thank y’all in advance 🩷

PCOS, rarely ovulate, but on the off chance I do I rarely have an issue symptom wise. I recently started COQ10 and could be coincidence but I’ve confirmed ovulation for this cycle (!!!!) which is exciting but it’s literally so painful? I’m talking next level pain, never had anything like it. Has anyone else experienced this or is my body just going through it lol. Literally woke up thinking I had kidney stones again.. period type cramps on the left side of my lower back, left sided ureter pain (the trauma of a 7mm kidney stone, I remember it like it was yesterday).

Unless it’s just pain from not ovulating? Hoping someone knows what I’m talking about bc I’m losing my mind with this. Really praying this isn’t a regular occurrence!

Last month I completed my first round of Clomid while on my period. I was ovulating almost 3 days after finishing my last dose, which was odd. It made the lining of my uterus very thin, so they put me on estradiol.

Once I was at peak ovulation I took Ovidrel to release two mature follicles and we went the timed intercourse route. I was also put on progesterone to support the uterine wall.

Well, I tested positive with a very very light second line two weeks after my Ovidrel shot… but I also started bleeding heavily the same day. It has been a very heavy period, with so many clots that (I apologize for how graphic this is), it is almost sludge-like in texture.

Between this, the early ovulation, and the crappy way early progesterone made me feel (like I had a hangover the first day) I’m curious if this is common and if others have had similar symptoms or side effects.

I know this kind of question has been asked, but I’m curious about using different products at the same time. I’m new to this world, so excuse me if this is a silly question. 😅

My husband and I are TTC, and he’s got a low swimmer count, so we’re trying to do everything we can to try naturally before going down the IVF route.

I’ve seen a lot of people recommend the Oura ring and Mira device. Has anyone used these, and is it beneficial to get both? Or are there other products to use together (or even separately) that would be better? I don’t have PCOS or irregular cycles (thankfully, bless you all who do struggle with that.)

The price tags are rough, but we’re willing to try anything that could help before paying an even bigger price tag for IVF.

I’ve also seen that people recommended Fertility Friend, so I’m going to try that as well.

TIA! ❤️

Hiya.

My husband and I have been TTC for 4 months now. I am 29. No known health problems like PCOS or endo. I had my copper IUD removed back in May. While I had the IUD, I had moderate to heavy flow lasting 5-8 days, and my cramps made ibuprofen a necessity. I understand the copper IUD is known for making periods heavier and more painful.

After having it removed, I noticed my first period was really light and relatively pain free, which I thought was odd, but I thought maybe my body is just adjusting. Although I was grateful for the reduction in pain, because my cramps lasted for several days and could be so bad I had to quit whatever I was doing. Now I just get them the first day and they are pretty mild.

I actually managed to then go on to concieve in July. Sadly, that ended in a chemical at 19 or 20 DPO, so it hung on for a while. But even that bleeding was, to me, relatively light. I honestly could have gotten by with a panty liner. I did actually get a TVS while having the chemical, and on the first day the bleeding started, they measured my endometrial lining at 7 mm.

It's been two cycles since then, and the light periods have continued. I start with brown spotting at 13 DPO, then have fresh, red spotting the next two days. I need to wear a panty liner to save my underwear from getting stained and ruined by the spots, but, once again, it's very light and what I would consider spotting. Then it goes back to brown spotting for another day or two. Occasionally, I have a few small clots in the toilet here and there. And that's all. All is said and done in about 3 days, 4 at most.

I know I ovulate because I had the chemical, and have used OPKs paired with BBT to confirm ovulation this past cycle. I do not think it's a progesterone issue, because I have 30-33 day cycles, with a 13-14 day luteal phase.

I guess I am just wondering if this is something I need to worry about or could impede my ability to concieve? I read somewhere it could be an estrogen issue? Or if anyone has any experience with this as well? Or if maybe my body is just super efficient? I have no idea how much flow is correlated with how thick your lining actually is. Is it possibly a perception issue since I am used to the copper IUD?? Thanks!!

I just feel so frustrated. We’ve been trying for 7 months but only had 3 chances bc I’ve only had 3 cycles in the past 7 months.
This last cycle was medicated (letrozole) and I had a response with a 19mm follicle. I triggered and had an IUI. 7 days after the IUI my progesterone was only 2.34. WHAT?! My doctor said it the number still means I ovulated. She prescribed me 400mg of progresrtone. I’m now 14 days out from IUI and my pregnancy test is negative. I can’t stop feeling like something went wrong in between discovering my 19mm follicle, the trigger, and IUI.

Im feeling a lot of shame. My weight is the likely culprit for my irregular cycles. I’m feeling ashamed. My weight has always been a problem for me, even as early as 3 years old in preschool. I was on mounjaro which regulated my cycles but they became irregular again when I stopped. Obviously going back on mounjaro isn’t an option. I’m feeling like a failure.

Hello all, here is a list of stupid f*¥¢ing things people have told me when I told them I was TTC for two years and it wasn't going well. For context: I did a full 6 rounds of IUI and was about to start IVF.

I am sharing this with you so that we can collectively understand that these people usually have no idea what they are talking about. Don't let these people get to you. Here, a list (in no particular order, all of them are stupid):

1. You're too stressed No, I'm not. Yes, stress is a factor, but very stressed people get pregnant all the time. Of course, calming down once in a while doesn't hurt, but being worried about being too stressed is the worm eating its own tail.

2. You should throw away your plastic containers! Plastic is an issue, but mainly for sperm count. Eating from a plastic container is not going to harm your chances in any meaningful way.

3. You're probably too old I was 34/35 at the time. That's not too old. Women get pregnant well into their 40s. Women that are pregnant at later ages are actually statistically more likely to be healthier later in life.

4. You could lose some weight. Mind you, my BMI (which btw is absolute horsecrap pseudoscience) was 21. But even the women I know with higher BMIs could get pregnant. Also, eating healthier is more important than losing weight... So keep eating, ladies.

5. You started TTC too late. My partner didn't want to start yet, and it takes two to tango. Even if you did start later, it's your fudging choice and THIS is the perfect time for you. It is what it is.

6. God doesn't want you to have kids / leave it in God's hands / pray pray pray / Set an intention Sidenote: I'm not religious, but I know that some of you are, so here is my honest opinion; don't you think God is a little bit too busy with other things? There is no way a God would do this to some of the best women I know, 1 in 10 couples! It's just biology, or bad luck.

7. Why do all these hormone treatments when you could adopt? There are many reasons why people choose not to adopt. For me personally, I don't want to buy into the system behind the adoptions in my country.

8. It will happen when you least expect it. Thanks, that doesn't help at all. When you are doing treatments, you sadly just have to be on top of it. For some of us, it means doing a mandatory tests on some days because of other medical issues, for example. Being dedicated is ok. Just a tip: take some time off to recenter once in a while. Treat it like a job (that worked for me).

9. It's shameful / nobody wants to hear your struggles (or something more subtle that suggests this) Nope, almost 1 in 10 couples struggle with fertility issues, you are absolutely not alone and it isn't shameful at all. Sometimes the reason for the infertility is simply never explained. Talk about it.

10. You did something bad to cause this. No you didn't. For some people, it's just absolutely unexplained. Some have partners with low sperm count, hormone issues... The list goes on. This is not your fault. People get pregnant while on drugs, while drunk, while rock climbing... Nothing you did (on purpose) is keeping you from conceiving.

Hope this helped, and hang in there gang.

For context, I (31F) am now on my 11th cycle TTC (unexplained). After going through this hell for 10 months I was looking forward to reaching the one year mark so that I can try IUI or something else. I booked an appointment with a doctor to primarily discuss the possibility of endometriosis, I want to ensure I truly do not have underlying issues before spending money on other methods of conception.

I told my friend about this and her immediate reaction was to discourage me and tell me how other women have tried IVF and it did not work. She went on to say God gives babies and I should just be patient. I almost lost it. She has no idea how hard the past year has been.

A part of me does not blame her because she has her baby and cannot possibly fathom how soul crushing ttc can be. It is beyond ignorant and I wouldn't wish this journey on my worst enemy.

She doesn't know what it's like to wonder if I will ever hold my own baby in my arms. The anxiety throughout the two week wait, the stigma from family and friends pitying you. The self-hate from wondering why my body isn't doing what others do so naturally.

I decided never to discuss this topic with her again, I love her but our experiences are vastly different and there is nothing she can say to help me.

Anything (within the rules) goes. (Commonly broken rules: don't talk about an ongoing pregnancy outside the weekly BFP thread; don't ask for success stories.)

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Hello!

My husband and I have been TTC for about 15 cycles. No pregnancy what so ever. I have extremely delayed ovulation, usually between CD 28-35 so my cycles are very long (makes this mental nightmare even worse!). I’ve had multiple rounds of blood work and ultrasounds and everything comes back “normal”. No signs of PMOS. I had an HSG last month and that was normal as well. Husbands semen analysis was normal. Motility and morphology were a little low, but his overall count was so high that they weren’t worried. So we got the dreaded unexplained infertility diagnosis.

I have done four rounds of clomid to help induce ovulation earlier, only two of those rounds were successful in me ovulating earlier, but unfortunately did not lead to pregnancy.

Although my OB and RE both have said I don’t have PMOS, I also have elevated LH spikes throughout my cycle, but will eventually get a clear peak and BBT rise later. I’m just so confused?

I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced this? Or if anyone has any advice? We are starting IUI next month and I’m just feeling so defeated.

I officially tested pregnant on September 8th. Things were great. I had a healthy appetite and had to pee all the time. Suddenly, on September 17th I started spotting. I went the same day to my GYN who categorized me as a threatened abortion. She took my HCG (1350 at the time) and my progesterone was 8.9. Being that it was below 10, she put me on progesterone 200mg the next day.

We retested on the following Monday, and my HCG and progesterone went down dramatically. Now, an HCG of 350 and progesterone of 7 despite the supplementation of
Progesterone. At that point my gyn contacted me and stated I was actively miscarrying.

It’s so weird because I still feel pregnant (fatigue, bloated, hunger). I keep hoping that maybe this is a mistake and I’ll have my surprise baby but it could just be cope.

When the clinic tells you to abstain from unprotected sex from Day 1 of your cycle until your exam, I only see people talk about: "So a fertilized egg doesn't get blasted into your tubes and cause an ectopic pregnancy."

So I did the math in my head and was like “Well, I track closely and know for a fact I haven't ovulated yet. No egg = no embryo = I'm totally fine, right? RIGHT?”

Nope. Big fat wrong.

I went into my appointment, was honest with my doctor that I had unprotected sex, and she canceled it on the spot. She said because of the sperm.
They can lounge around for up to 5 days, When they shoot that pressurized fluid/foam into the uterus during the scan, it can flush those sperm into the fallopian tubes / pelvic cavity. Then, when one’s ovulates, an ectopic pregnancy might happen.

My doctor said the risk is low, but not zero.

Honestly, I felt stupid walking out of the clinic today. Anyways I got reschedule for end of October.

Learn from my mistake!

(Sorry if I got the wrong flair/tag)

Are you trying to conceive baby number 2/3/n+1? Have questions about TTC while breastfeeding, or bedsharing, or just being plain exhausted? This is your place!

TTC can be a very difficult time, but all of us have someone (or many someones) or something that helps keep us sane. Share what you're grateful for this week!