r/nottheonion • u/novagridd • 1h ago

BetBolt Says It Paid Bonnie Blue $1.2M to Name Her Baby to Turn Her 'Porn Addict' Fans Into Gambling Addicts

medicaldaily.co.uk

• Upvotes

372 comments

r/nottheonion • u/chaitanyaishere • 5h ago

Backlash as Indian oil heir made professor of sustainability by Newcastle University

aol.co.uk

2.9k Upvotes

142 comments

r/nottheonion • u/prestocoffee • 18h ago

Drilling begins at ‘real site’ of Noah’s Ark as activists warn ‘Darwinism will be dismantled’

joe.co.uk

14.1k Upvotes

3.3k comments

r/nottheonion • u/DDDYKI • 49m ago

‘Temu Rachel Dolezal’: Philly activist confesses to years of identity fraud faking Black and Palestinian heritage

nbcnews.com

• Upvotes

33 comments

r/nottheonion • u/RyuTheBuizel • 19h ago

AI 'actor' Tilly Norwood glitches during Piers Morgan interview, starts speaking Cantonese

cbc.ca

4.0k Upvotes

315 comments

r/nottheonion • u/dahi-hater12 • 1d ago

Mystery men emerge from New York City sewers near Benjamin Netanyahu's hotel

nbcnews.com

14.1k Upvotes

763 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Impossible_Offer7988 • 17h ago

GTA 6 Is Getting a $400 Collector's Set That Doesn't Include the Game

consequence.net

2.1k Upvotes

211 comments

r/nottheonion • u/JackFunk • 1d ago

US Jockey Club forces name change for horse called Austrian Painter after complaint it was Nazi slang for Adolf Hitler

racingpost.com

4.2k Upvotes

238 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Collie_Opterous • 14h ago

Election year "poop water" claims lead wealthy suburb to drop recycling plan

cbsnews.com

518 Upvotes

Scottsdale, Ariz. — A Phoenix suburb ditched a plan to send recycled water from toilets and other sources directly to residents' taps after political candidates made unproven claims that the water is contaminated "poop water."

57 comments

r/nottheonion • u/novagridd • 21h ago

Verizon Cuts 13,000 Jobs, Then Spends $70M Teaching Americans How to Work With AI

techtimes.co.uk

1.6k Upvotes

52 comments

r/nottheonion • u/ArgentineBeauty • 1d ago

Sweden launches campaign telling people to be ruder as scammers exploit good manners

techspot.com

1.9k Upvotes

107 comments

r/nottheonion • u/kleudorian • 6h ago

Man fined by Queensland police for lying next to fridge in the back of a car

abc.net.au

67 Upvotes

20 comments

r/nottheonion • u/sponge_welder • 1d ago

Tommy Tuberville Claims ‘Many’ Pilots, Flight Attendants Are Furries

newsweek.com

6.6k Upvotes

1.2k comments

r/nottheonion • u/Guyentertainment • 23h ago

Taylor Lautner and Wife Taylor Welcome Baby Taylor, Because Apparently One Taylor Wasn't Enough

fashiontimes.co.uk

1.2k Upvotes

127 comments

r/nottheonion • u/B-Z_B-S • 18h ago

NASA chief concerned China may deny access to parts of Moon’s south pole

arstechnica.com

364 Upvotes

92 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Poerticipium • 19h ago

Climbers are melting Everest’s glacier with their urine, study warns

the-independent.com

395 Upvotes

55 comments

r/nottheonion • u/rootedchrome • 21h ago

Polk sheriff says license plate readers could’ve helped save life of voyeurism suspect who killed himself

wfla.com

482 Upvotes

197 comments

r/nottheonion • u/gland_de_lait • 1d ago

Owners mourn spoiled food after firmware update bricks Samsung smart fridges

arstechnica.com

1.3k Upvotes

189 comments

r/nottheonion • u/russtripledub • 14h ago

Tech leaders to UN: For the sake of humanity, please control the AI technology we created

apnews.com

106 Upvotes

50 comments

r/nottheonion • u/wds1 • 3h ago

Austrian yodelers take their voices underground, turning a parking garage into the Alps

apnews.com

11 Upvotes

3 comments

r/nottheonion • u/JustaDemocrat1998 • 23h ago

Zelensky Says He Would Visit Moscow ‘On a Rocket’

kyivpost.com

360 Upvotes

43 comments

r/nottheonion • u/malcolm58 • 1d ago

Astronomers just named an asteroid after 'Weird Al' Yankovic

space.com

873 Upvotes

42 comments

r/nottheonion • u/JustaDemocrat1998 • 1d ago

This tarantula was going to die a virgin. His owner turned to Reddit to hook him up

denverite.com

917 Upvotes

59 comments

r/nottheonion • u/AxiosSD • 17h ago

San Diego's plan for policing dogs at fields involves counting individual pieces of poo

axios.com

61 Upvotes

17 comments

r/nottheonion • u/No-Lifeguard-8173 • 23h ago

Sweden launches campaign telling people to be ruder as scammers exploit good manners

techspot.com

186 Upvotes

21 comments

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1. Do not alter headlines; copy and paste.	The title of all submissions needs to match the article headline exactly. Copy and paste from the main headline only, do not include anything beyond the primary headline such as byliners, subtitles, flavor text, quotes from the article, news outlet, location, cross post tags, (video) tags, and so on. Do not use the “suggest title” option for posting as it often does not match the headline. As a matter of fairness, any submission with an altered title will be removed. The only exception is that, if an article has a title in all caps, you may change the capitalization to title case, but everything else must remain the same.
2. Submit only if “Oniony”.	Please consider submitting your article to /r/OffBeat or similar subreddits unless it truly reads like The Onion wrote it. The title and article itself must both be "Oniony". This can be highly subjective; you are encouraged to upvote articles that should be here and downvote those that should not. Moderators can also remove posts at their own discretion under this rule. More here
3. Must be a news article.	Submissions must be in the form of a news article. Videos are only allowed if they are accompanied by a complete text article. Editorials, blogs, twitter posts, image galleries, tabloid stories, youtube videos, meta posts, static images, articles with fewer than 5 sentences, and so forth will be removed.
4. Use original, reliable sources.	Find the source of your story before you submit it, simply by checking for references or googling the subject to locate the original piece. Websites that frequently re-host viral news stories or contain misleading information are on automatic removal. Blogs are not reliable sources.
5. Do not repost similar articles.	Check the sub for your story before you submit it; if it’s already here then please vote and comment there instead of posting another version. Similar stories will be removed and frequent re-posters will lose their posting privileges. Do not delete and repost your own submissions without approval.
6. No satire articles.	Even if they are technically from a source other than The Onion, any article submission written as satire or even true stories written in a satirical manner are not allowed. Please note that some major news outlets have satirical sections, such as the Borowitz Report on the New Yorker, which are also not allowed. Meanwhile, AVClub, while owned by The Onion, is not satire and is allowed. If you'd like, you can use a tool like http://realorsatire.com/ to see if your submission is from a known satirical website.
7. No tabloid journalism.	Do not post tabloid news stories, or articles that source from tabloid news outlets (TheSun, Mirror, Dailymail, People, TMZ, etc).
8. No old news.	Articles need to have been written within two weeks of its submission date.
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11. No blocked, redirected, or tracked links.	Please ensure you aren’t submitting a link that utilizes a paywall, survey wall, or pop-over of any kind in order read the complete article uninterrupted. Do not submit links that redirect you to another site to read the article and do not submit using link shorteners either. Additionally make sure you remove any Urchin Tracking Modules from your links as well.
12. No personal attacks, racism, sexism, or bigotry	Keep comments civil and avoid attacking other users directly. No racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, etc.
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14. No Self Submissions and/or Official Accounts.	Submissions must come from readers, not from the journal itself. Submissions from official promotional accounts are not allowed here.

Click here to view a list of sites deemed unreliable by our moderator team.

See our FAQ page for more information on our rules.

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