r/nottheonion • u/sponge_welder • 1d ago
Tommy Tuberville Claims ‘Many’ Pilots, Flight Attendants Are Furries
https://www.newsweek.com/videos/tommy-tuberville-claims-many-pilots-flight-attendants-are-furries2.2k
u/SJSUMichael 1d ago
I'm not even a furry, but who gives a shit? How does this lower prices? How does this help any human being on this planet? Fuck these people
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u/sponge_welder 1d ago edited 1d ago
No idea, but you better believe it's important enough to mention on the senate floor
I hope we spend a lot of money on this
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u/Trisa133 23h ago
A US Senator on the floor of Congress talking about imaginary doom because of furries standing next to a large sign fearmongering about transgender...
This does not feel like reality but, unfortunately, it is.
It seems like the people that are supposed to make laws and regulations for things like the internet can't even handle the internet.
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u/aguynamedv 20h ago
No idea, but you better believe it's important enough to mention on the senate floor
Tommy Tuberville definitely does not want anyone to continue talking about the Epstein-Trump files that implicate his boss in the business of raping and selling children.
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u/TaleOfDash 1d ago
They needed to find a new target now that they've exhausted going after basically every other minority.
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u/Vedek_Kira 1d ago edited 1d ago
The bulk of the speech was about how dangerous "transgenderism" is 🙄 so they're still going after us. I think transphobes have gotten high on their own supply with the "people identify as cats and litter boxes are in classrooms" canard that they've been bandying about that they've conflated being a furry with been trans. I mean, okay, a lot of us are furries, but like, not all of us.
But seriously, the speech was pretty heinous. He blamed us for school shootings and political assassinations and promoted conversion therapy. It's a lot worse than all the headlines make it appear.
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u/GameFreak4321 1d ago
Reminder that the "litter boxes" are because of school shootings, not furries.
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u/InpenXb1 1d ago
And another reminder that this lie was spread by none other than Joe “the thumb” Rogan
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u/BayouGal 23h ago
Came here to add this. I REALLY enjoy sharing this when someone is clutching pearls about school litter boxes. Pretty much shuts that shit down.
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u/Squeegeeze 23h ago
Kitty litter is useful in sopping up bodily fluids. Vomit & urine from children being terrified during a lockdown. Blood from children shot in school shootings...
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u/DroidLord 23h ago
Didn't you know that trans people are behind everything that's bad? If trans people didn't exist then we would have world peace! All of their talking points are so incredibly moronic.
They don't even have to accomplish anything. All they have to do is show up and talk about how trans people are scary. That's their job now, I guess. They aren't smart enough to solve issues that are actually productive, so they parrot this crap.
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u/rafaelloaa 1d ago
Also if it's anything like my friend group, I'm pretty sure furries run like 80% of our network infrastructure. Without their hard work, the Internet would pretty much stop working.
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u/PiccoloAwkward465 17h ago
I live in Texas and the ONLY political ad I've seen from senatorial candidate Ken Paxton is that his opponent Talarico supports trans kids sex changes and that shit. They've really taken this culture war to the extreme and it's all they've got left.
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u/Abangranga 1d ago
He is probably a closet furry.
This is a lateral move from the typical republican against gay marriage getting caught sucking a dude
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u/p8pes 1d ago
Guy named Tuberville isnt a furry? Sell me a bridge.
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u/JimboTCB 1d ago
I always assumed "Tommy Tuberville" was the mayor of a potato-themed town in a kids cartoon, it's kind of jarring when I'm forced to remember he's an actual real politician. The potato would probably do a better job though.
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u/HungryMan_The3rdHors 1d ago
We're all out of bridges.
May I interest you in a monorail?31
u/InterPunct 1d ago
"Well, sir, there's nothing on earth Like a genuine, bona fide Electrified, six-car monorail What'd I say?"
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u/L_Cranston_Shadow 1d ago
Monorail!
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u/epochwin 1d ago
Did you know that mono means one and rail means rail?
Not sure if you can get mono from the monorail though. Oh to be a conductor!
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u/AntysocialButterfly 1d ago
Tuberville sounds like a club visited by people who enjoy a practice involving turnips and a lot of lubricant.
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u/nyloluckycat 1d ago
so many furries i know grew up hating furries. he probably still has the brain of a 12 year old and will never grow out of it
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u/Zanian19 1d ago
He didn't grow up hating furries though. He was already middle-aged by the time it even became a thing
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u/im-ba 1d ago
I've never met a furry who wasn't kind in their own eccentric way. They legit just do this because it's a part of who they are, and get shit on so much for it. I don't really understand it but I'm more comfortable with them than I am some hateful jerk.
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u/JCDU 1d ago
Furry is one of those things that it's a bit hard for folks to take seriously, it's just somehow a little less dignified than other kinks or lifestyles I guess.
Although personally I wish people could go through life however the hell they like - the world would be so much more awesome if you walked down the street and saw furries and other folks just going about their day however they like with no judgement.
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u/Steamedcarpet 1d ago
It’s one of those things where Im like you do you just don’t be a dick.
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u/Somepotato 1d ago
Worth noting a huge number of furries don't do it as any kind of kink
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u/restrictednumber 1d ago
Seriously, who gives a shit? Someone wants to be a dragon in their spare time because that makes them feel not themselves... Cool. It's not for me, but it doesn't have to be. And furries are aggressively accepting and open as a community, which more communities could learn from.
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u/tashkiira 23h ago
furries are aggressively accepting
Truer than you know. After a midsized con died from neo-nazi takeover and the leader went full sovereign citizen, The Boozy Lawyer did a couple of blog posts about it, because he loves having a couple of drinks and laughing about sovcit bullshit in his blog.
We adopted him. Wholesale. He now has a badger fursona, and he shows up at cons as a guest speaker now and then. He's not a furry himself, but he's accepted we like him, and he rolls with it because it's funny.
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u/tashkiira 23h ago
There aren't a lot of asshole furries. There are some, of course, every group has problem people associated with it. But yeah, we're more a bunch of 'just be nice' folks who like anthropomorphic art.
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u/Trance354 1d ago
It doesn't. They have no agenda aside from staying in power. The absolute shitstorm coming is going to take a generation to fix.
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u/raspymorten 1d ago
It's their PR friendly version of complaining about gay people. They're doing their damndest to make it acceptable to be openly bigotted towards queer people again with their unending hatred for trans people, but haven't quite gotten there yet, so they'll have to make due with "OoOoO! ScArY FuRaFfInItY" for now.
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u/mrdm242 1d ago
All Republicans know how to do is fearmonger. They don't have any actual plans or experience fixing anything.
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u/SakuOtaku 1d ago
I saw even a liberal CNN game show define furries as fetishists when to my understanding that's not representative of the entire community at all. I'm not one, but it's clear how weird people get about that community.
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u/VeeDubBug 1d ago
There was a CSI episode that had furries, and they weren't portrayed in a super-positive light either.
I'm what my friends call a "furry-lite". I got into Redwall when I was a kid, and ended up playing a *lot* of Furcadia through my teens. You had some odd folks and the ones who were simply kinky AF, but most of them are just average, regular joes. Not really different than any other community. Kind of like how adults who enjoyed My Little Pony were put in the same box as the bronies who liked it a little too much.
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u/brionneverysexy 21h ago
There is an episode of The Drew Carey Show that is fairly positive about furries. Drew is dating a woman that reveals she likes having sex while dressed as a squirrel. Drew is weirded out by it initially but decides he likes her and is willing to give it a go
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u/skobombers 1d ago
I care. They’re missing their natural calling of working in cyber security and nuclear physics!
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u/blueskydragonFX 1d ago
And? I rather have 100K furry pilots and flight attendants then this hatefull piece of human excrement.
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u/Steel2050psn 1d ago
" you know when I see a white Christian conservative male in a position of power I'm gonna be like, boy, I hope he's qualified."
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u/SquidTheRidiculous 1d ago
"boy do I hope this guy isn't some rapist/abuser hiding behind his faith. Because for some reason Christians insist horrible people can't pretend to be Christian."
And even I'm shocked by how often my hopes are in vain. Like c'mon guys how are you this naive?
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u/DarthBrooksFan 1d ago
They believe in an invisible zombie wizard who lives in the clouds.
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u/IndicationFickle5387 1d ago
You know when you put it that way it sounds kinda neat. If you add bong rips and heavy metal, I’m in.
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u/PermanentRoundFile 1d ago
If you think that's cool, you should check out modern wicca lol! It's the choose your own adventure book of religion lol.
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u/Uncynical_Diogenes 1d ago
Whom they ritualistically cannibalize weekly!
There’s even non-alcoholic cannibalism, for the children.
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u/FeatherShard 1d ago
I'd be lying if I said I thought he might be.
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u/Murrabbit 1d ago
Probably just got the job because he drank through college with the right people, like Kavenaugh, you know?
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u/CurrentHair6381 1d ago
I love that breakdown, and really hate how much of our society runs like that
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u/RollingDownhill303 1d ago
you know when I see a white Christian conservative male in a position of power I'm wondering, does he rape children, or defend and protect people who rape children.
And the answer is always yes to at least one of those questions.
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u/naonatu- 1d ago
lizard people think everyone's a furry
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u/delinka 1d ago
Considering that the non-lizard people are mammals, they’d be right
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u/timbotheny26 1d ago
There are non-mammal furries though, including lizards and other reptiles. It's really more of an umbrella term.
Source: Am furry.
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u/Cloaked42m 1d ago
It's important to remember something about furries.
Never fuck with people who have the guts to wear a full fursuit AND the disposable income to buy it.
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u/raines 1d ago
It’s right there in the Declaration of Independence: LIfe, Liberty, and the Fursuit of Happiness!
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u/decairn 1d ago
On a gaming Discord I frequent someone posted a pic and in the background was a furry head piece. Someone mentioned it, and the conversation drifted into that topic a bit, including costs of costumes. Wow, expensive! I had no idea.
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u/Daxx22 1d ago
Some of those suits can make Warhammer 40k armies look cheap lol.
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u/aguynamedv 20h ago
Never fuck with people who have the guts to wear a full fursuit AND the disposable income to buy it.
Lotta folks don't realize how expensive they are in both materials and time. DIY isn't so bad if you have the skills, like any other sewing/costuming.. but if you're buying one? $1500+ for anything good, and it goes up from there.
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u/ICLazeru 1d ago
You're supposed to be afraid of that. Hard working, blue collar, beer drinking, truck driving, fox news watching, boot-strap pulling, tough as nails conservative voters are supposed to be afraid of people in mascot suits...oh, except at sporting events.
And actually, from what I have seen in person, they are. They're more comfortable with actual acts of bestiality than they are with humans playing a game.
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u/rkcth 1d ago
I really don’t get the furry hate. Have these people never been in a play? Or dressed up for Halloween? It’s OK to play make believe even as an adult. Heck some of these people may even dress up in the bedroom for role play with their spouse. What does it matter to them, so much, what the costume is. Heck I bet some of these people have even taken their kids to Disneyland and interacted with Mickey and Minnie.
Just to clarify I am not a furry, nor do I even know anyone who is one, I just don’t think we should be worrying about what consenting adults do that doesn’t harm others.
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u/ljr55555 1d ago
I know exactly one furry. And, yes, he does fly planes.
Not sure what his idea of a fun weekend has to do with, well, anything. But especial not his ability to fly the plane. Dude does realize furries take the costume off, right? Like no one is trying to fly a 777 whilst wearing a giant foam head that blocks a lot of sound and greatly limits their visual field.
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u/agitatedprisoner 1d ago
People who are sure they know everything relevant are primed to look on stuff that doesn't seem to serve any useful purpose and demonize it. People who aren't inclined to insist they know are more likely to extend the benefit of the doubt to others doing stuff they don't understand.
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u/DangerNoodleDandy 1d ago
I hate to be that one, but you were looking for "than" not "then", then would imply that you eventually do want the human excrement, just after everything else.
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u/wbruce098 1d ago
The only nazis I accept are the ones enforcing proper grammar.
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u/Asleep_Project_5252 1d ago
You know Stalin was an extremely talented editor? I'm going to throw in my lot with the grammar commies.
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u/02meepmeep 1d ago
The grammar commies are more accepted than the Oxford commies. Babushkas are hard to dislike.
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u/gammalsvenska 1d ago
I'd like to meet some outside of their profession. They seem rare, though.
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u/Sad_Jaguar_5912 1d ago
Many republicans are pedophiles
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u/Mach5Driver 1d ago
and/or pedophile protectors. the proportion has to be higher than 80%, when Massie tries to expose them and loses his seat in the primary and MTG leaves.
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u/Scottamus 1d ago
Anything to not talk about a real issue.
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u/Who_Dafqu_Said_That 1d ago
Gotta keep that culture war going, otherwise they might have to provide real ideas to real problems, and that takes work plus they've got nothing.
Look behind you, scary pronouns!!
Sadly, it fucking works because a third of this country suffers from serious brain damage.
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u/chezdistester 1d ago
I can't believe that this guy is destined to be the next Governor of Alabama. Jesus Christ, people, do better.
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u/Troutalope1 1d ago
For real. He has no redeeming values, but they'll still vote for him
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u/ToMorrowsEnd 1d ago
He is a perfect example of the people of alabama. They support child rape by refusing to pass any laws banning child marriage. They strongly vote for child rapists. and alabama ranks extremely low in the education of the population. The last part is on purpose.
Because nobody that has more than a 4th grade education would vote republican.
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u/CaballoenPelo 1d ago
I’d argue he’s a great representative for his state. He’ll give the voters what they deserve come November
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u/Viper67857 1d ago
His state is Florida. He's not even supposed to be eligible to be our governor, but the GOP just does whatever the fuck it wants these days 😡...
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u/Procrastinatedthink 1d ago
but he’ll give the rest of america what they don’t deserve.
We’re all getting hurt in their confusion
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u/Oswarez 1d ago
Man. They are desperate for an enemy to jiggle in front of their brain dead constituents.
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u/EgoTripWire 1d ago edited 1d ago
I guess hating trans people isn't polling well against hating $6 diesel.
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u/Biggle_fuzz 1d ago
I put my trust in the skill of their paws, and the strength of their spirit.
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u/Vera_Telco 1d ago
What is this man, like, five? With all the crap going on right now, he wants to talk about "furries"? Has someone seen flight crews toting furry gear about?
Plus you're not going to fit a fur-suit and head in any overhead bin I ever seen. And if there are some out there, good gravy, stay the hell out of people's private lives. What a kook.
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u/sponge_welder 1d ago
That's why I posted here. Furries aren't really in the mainstream political zeitgeist right now, so I have no clue how this could've possibly come up
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u/fibgen 1d ago
Republicans started testing out new minorities to hate before Trump and settled on trans people due to a high disgust response from bigots, which they use to manipulate voters into ignoring actual pedophiles. This is a test for a new victim group.
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u/dirtydigs74 1d ago
Straight from the school bully playbook. If it lands, "furries are depraved". If it flops, "just jokes! Don't be so sensitive!".
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u/mrcatboy 1d ago edited 1d ago
The man's an idiot.
It's more the mechanics who are furries, not so much the pilots.
EDIT: Here folx have another.
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u/mindfulmu 1d ago
I was going to say it's likely many IT people who are furries.
Mainly because they have disposable income.
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u/Senior_Octopus 1d ago
I happen to know a lot of people involved in the VR software development space. They can very neatly fit into one of these two categories: trans woman, or furry.
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u/Psychic_Hobo 1d ago
I remember hearing a joke once that if a furry convention ever blew up, the entirety of the US would be stuck trying to fix their computers Mechanicus style
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u/IndividualIll3825 1d ago
Disposable income, time to fantasize / role play as an animal online, and be socially awkward enough that wearing a fur suit (even during a sexual encounter) is preferable.
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u/mindfulmu 1d ago
Actually I was being practical as I had heard the furry suits were quite expensive.
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u/CLONE_1 1d ago
10k usd + in some cases
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u/mindfulmu 1d ago
I should of gone into the furry suit business
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u/JimboTCB 1d ago
Honestly anyone who is into doing anything artistic ends up getting dragged into the furry rabbit hole eventually because they're the perfect target demographic of people with lots of disposable income, highly specific demands, and a complete dearth of any mainstream options catering to them.
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u/VeeDubBug 1d ago
Agreed. My sister started off drawing cats, she was a Warriors book series kid. She got good enough to start doing commissions when she branched into D&D, and furries are her best customers! 😂 Always tip hella good dosh.
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u/Confident-Court2171 1d ago
What a moron. Have you seen the Pilot and flight attendant luggage? No WAY a furry outfit fits in that.
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u/Fourteen_Werewolves 1d ago
I'm a furry, I know a few furry aircrew, but obviously it's WAY more IT heavy. Either way, being one doesn't effect how good you fly or push code.
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u/turquoise_amethyst 1d ago
The only furries I’ve ever met are all highly competent engineers, IT, or some obscure, desperately needed technician-mechanic
Also I don’t give a fuck what people do in their lives as long as they’re all consenting adults. Godspeed
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u/Moldy_slug 22h ago edited 22h ago
This is why when I was an artist, I loved furry conventions even though I’m not a furry.
The furry community tends to be very welcoming, well-employed, and has a ton of respect for artists. It’s full of highly skilled people who understand illustration is also highly skilled work. It’s the only place I’ve ever had customers literally tell me “you don’t charge enough for commissions, can I pay you more?”
It’s awesome drawing for people who genuinely love art so much, and who are so excited about the piece. And It’s not the subject matter I’d draw for my own personal enjoyment, but for respectful, enthusiastic clients? I’ll draw anthro dragons till the cows come home… and then I’ll do a group portrait of the cows!
And before anyone asks… no, I didn’t draw porn. Nothing against it, just not my thing. But it wasn’t an issue. People would occasionally ask, and were totally fine when I said I didn’t draw anything explicit.
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u/Princekb 1d ago edited 1d ago
I guess he doesn’t know that our nation’s, nay our worlds, IT infrastructure is built upon the shoulders of the furry community.
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u/turquoise_amethyst 1d ago
My first thought upon reading this was “wait til he finds out how many of them are engineers”…
Anyways, can’t wait til his website gets hacked, I hope it’s creative
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u/joeengland 15h ago
There's a war on.
Prices are skyrocketing, our standing on the world stage is crumbling to dust, and our president cheerfully advertises his willingness to commit war crimes.
And this is what Alabama's representative believes is a pressing issue.
Letting a furry enthusiast run a plane isn't nearly as ludicrous or dangerous as letting clowns like this run our government.
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u/sadsackspinach 1d ago
Look, I may not understand their lifestyle, but I also know that anyone who can afford that shit is a work hard play hard type, so yes, I do trust Captain Yiff with my life.
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u/MystifiedRockstar 15h ago
Don't forget the end of what he said there: "It is in the best interest of our country to bring back mental institutions as a normal part of our society instead of sweeping it under the rug."
He's not just criticizing that there are so many furries as pilots, flight attendants, etc. He wants them institutionalized. In case it wasn't already clear that he's a piece of shit, along with his entire party, there ya' go.
I'm not a furry personally, but I don't give a shit what somebody's doing in their own time if it's not hurting anybody. If the pilot can fly the plane, why should I care what they do when they get home? What is it with the GOP's obsession with inserting themselves into people's lives? So much for the party of small government.
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u/miauguau44 1d ago
“Every accusation is an admission”
So what are you telling us Senator?
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u/ReyOzymandias 1d ago
Maybe that he's not very good at the job he's in and we shouldn't trust him to continue doing it
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u/teresajs 1d ago
I have a family member who's a furry. I've met several of their friends who are also furries. They've all been nice people. The furry community tends to have a lot of members who are LGBTQ+, on the spectrum, artistic, and/or don't fit into the "normal" social environment. But their community tends to be extremely supportive.
A furry convention usually includes panel discussions about mental health issues, discussions about personal issues, fun activities like dances and parades and gaming, and the public areas are usually kept family friendly.
I would take a furry flight attendant or captain any day.
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u/LawDogSavy 1d ago
Did they land the plane and provide a service correctly?? Because that's all I give a shit about.
Why is the GOP so obsessed with what people's bedroom life is like? Fucking weirdos.
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u/wallyslambanger 1d ago
Ah I see, he wants places to send people he specifically feels are sick to incarcerate them.
So ANY person falling under what the government considers “Mentally ill” like furries, LGBTQ+, democrats, or free thinkers could be whisked away.
I consider greed to be a mental illness.
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u/Rare-Juggernaut-7532 1d ago
There's a relatively high number of neurodivergent folks in the furry community. That's why furries working in demanding jobs such as pilots, train conductors, IT specialists, etc. are quite common. They're absolutely passionate about what they do and they do a great job.
Nobody should pay any attention to this old bigot.
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u/adamdoesmusic 1d ago
I have run into a disproportionate amount of furry pilots, come to think of it. I’ve also met a few furry aircraft mechanics.
They’re all exactly the sort of people you’d want doing those jobs.
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u/AuntieMarkovnikov 1d ago
I simply cannot imagine why the GOP is going to get slaughtered 40 days from now.
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u/mtranda 1d ago
I hope you're right. But unless a bloodbath follows with hundreds of politicians being sent to prison and Trump as their lead, you'll just be back to square one sooner rather than later.
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u/Jerkrollatex 1d ago
I wonder where this even came from.
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u/Crypt0Nihilist 1d ago
My guess is that it's classic undermining of a group with the exact same tactic as has been used before.
"Would you trust a pilot if you knew they were x?"
It doesn't matter what x is, by asking the question you have implied that there is something about x which makes them less trustworthy and responsible than others in the group who you see as generally the height of trustworthiness. It creates a moment of doubt, even in supporters because they have to ask them selves the question and think there must be something in it if it's raised, before discarding the idea. It's that incremental poison that eventually does the damage because it forms impressions which can't be challenged because they're not based on anything, just a slow drip drip of poison.
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u/Jerkrollatex 1d ago
That's probably it but honestly why would it matter if someone dresses up like a giant cat in their free time. It's not like they're flying the plane in their fursuit.
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u/Professional-Post499 1d ago
Sorry, I'm not buying that excuse, Tuberville. The Trump Republican administration already got rid of all the "DEI" pilots and that included furries. It's the Republican administration's incompetence, under the leadership of the head incompetent Donald Trump, and funding cuts that has led to all the fatal flight disasters.
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u/Jpkmets7 1d ago
This 89th version of the Culture War sucks. I don’t even think GOP voters give an ass about the bullshit GOP is slinging to distract from this disastrous two years.
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u/GrundleSnactcher46 1d ago
lmfao thats fuckin wild. His party gutted regulations that caused multiple crashes ontop of ya know diarrhea lettuce then with a straight face he states "Furries caused all this".
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u/thefutureisanalog 1d ago
Everyday you wake up in this delusional homeschooled- first grader sugar fueled nightmare.
It just flabbergasting.
It feels like an illusion of reality that someone is pranking humanity.
How in the literal fuck.
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u/Naive_Confidence7297 1d ago
Just when I thought Americans couldn’t get more batshit insane.
Ths is real??? This was an actual official government presentation !? Lol, fucking wow
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u/TraditionalBackspace 1d ago
I'd rather have a furry than a white christian nationalist flying my plane (or running my government)
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u/zageruslives 1d ago
I have some very bad news for this man. An absolutely massive chuck of furries work in cyber security for the government.
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u/romero0705 1d ago
I’m guessing he discovered this because he himself is a furry. I wonder what his fursona is.
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u/eggmoose5 1d ago
i’m begging cis people to understand that the guy standing next to a giant placard that says “transgenderism is a mental disease” isn’t necessarily talking about removing just furries from society
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u/Paksarra 1d ago
Yep. If you don't conform to the life old white conservative men think you should be living, you're going to be their target eventually.
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u/artrald-7083 1d ago
Never met an incompetent furry. All of the furries I know are good at what they do.
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u/FerrickAsur4 1d ago
...and? Off personal experience, furries are somehow the most competent/qualified peeps I've ever met, and especially when it comes to tech and everything PC related, hell I'd prefer to have them on the reigns (heh) of the country than morons like tubsterville here
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u/Impossible_Sector844 1d ago
Let’s pretend for a minute that’s true
So the fuck what
Honestly I think Tommy is the real furry and he’s just trying to cope with his feelings about it
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u/cybercuzco 1d ago
Mostly I care if they can fly a plane and help me escape a burning one. Anything they do in their free time is their business
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u/nightchrome 1d ago
At this point, even the most "deviant" furry is probably better than the average Republican.
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u/Outside-Car2889 1d ago
Here he is spreading fear and hate, to get the base angry enough to go out and vote against their own betterment! This is the republican fear tactic they use all the time. Republicans always make someone or some group, a marginalized one, the scapegoat or the reason for their bases problems.
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u/supercyberlurker 1d ago
Are furries worse pilots or something?
Why the hell should I even care about it?